WILMA

I'm in Washington, D.C., this weekend with my family. We were planning to fly home tomorrow morning, but our flight is canceled. So unless the forecast is even more inaccurate than usual, we're going to miss Wilma. Good luck to everybody down in Florida. We wish we could be there. But at least we know our house is well-protected.

Comments

[KOW]

You can always count on Walter!

[Walter]

Dave,

I'll do my best to keep Wilma away from your home. Please bring me back something valuable from our nation's capital. Perhaps an intern?

Love,

Walter

[Lt. Woman]

*sends Walter a bottle of Jose Cuervo to chase the Bacardi*

If you're gonna stand guard for so long with no break, you need something to keep you warm.

[Guin]

My parents live right around the corner from Gene Weingarten, in case you feel like stopping by.

[scat]

Dave, you horrible person! How could you possibly leave Walter lying in the gutter, helpless against Wilma? I'm calling the Department of Oosik Services.

PLUS, Walter will be permenantly scarred, (IF he survives) by the shame of being found in American Girl clothing.

[PeeJay]

Well Dave, since you no longer right a regular weekly (JOB) column, I guess it won't be a big deal if you get back or not. The way things look now on the weather future I suppose you should be checking out the great plains as your next permanent base. Unless "W" says not to. He's omniscient, ya know

[PeeJay]

Write, not right.

[PeeJay]

Write, not right.

[tropichunt.com guy™]

scat: Hey now, underneath all that newspaper Walter IS strapped down!

[PeeJay]

Oops!

[Theresa]

Dave, Well it's a good idea that you left Florida in case the hurricane hits in some fashion. Walter looks to be enjoying his view waiting for Wilma

[Dr. Sigmund Freud]

First, a toilet blog, now, a phalic blog; next we must expect an oral blog -- oral, anal, phalic.
. . . and all of you thought it was I who was obsessesed!

[Dread Pirate Shermano]

Oh, is it finally here? Huzzah, the waiting is over!

[U.O]

All this talk of the hurricane blowing into Florida reminded me that I had an ... interesting? ... experience/thought this weekend when traveling ...

We'd stopped for lunch prior to the last 50 miles of our trip. I had iced tea to drink. The straw was one of those with the little wrinkles in it, to make it so that you can bend it, without breaking or crimping it ...

The straw was a little too short to reach the bottom of the glass, so I stretched it out by popping all the little kinks to their limit ...

When I then tried to "use" the straw, it wouldn't work ... seems the kinks had all sprung leaks, and a lot of air came through the cracks ... which thereby rendered the utensil non-functional ...

What got me was this thought:

The straw sucked (to use the common vernacular), because it didn't!!!

Sorry ... back to your regularly scheduled stuff ...

[scat]

tropichuntguy, I am SO relieved! I'll cancel that call.

Hope Walter doesn't drown. I love Walter.

Go Sox.

[KCSteve]

U.O. - you could have just turned the straw upside down - it would have worked until the 'popped' wrinkles were above the level of the drink.

[louis gehrig]

Straw repair.

Wow.

This Blog has so many levels.

[Brad]

U.O. You may have had an Australian straw. On the other side of the equator, they suck the opposite direction.

[U.O]

Well, Dang!

Yeah, I thot of the upside-down trick, but when I pushed the wrinkles back together, it pretty much worked OK ...

r.e. the Australian model:

I did NOT (not knot) know (not no) that!

(Musta been a pretty classy restaurant, to have imported straws from Australia, eh, Mate?)

OMG!

I love the informational improvement made available to my mental processes by the bloggers here ...!

[Mr. Completely]

I can't help thinking that out there somewhere is a despondent walrus.

[Novanglus]

Yes, when someone very famous once said that "the meek shall inherit the earth", I feel very emotionally that Walter, humbly fits that well deserved catagory of the meek, and will get his just due in the near future. Brave Walter, on the battle front while his master runs to the bunkers of D.C. (just teasing Dave)

Why Dave did not take his family to Chicago, where his great humor is needed at this moment in time, we can only guess. Speaking of humor:..I saw Gorbachev thank Shirley McLaine tonight (on C-Span) for showing up to his NEW WORLD ORDER party, in which he commended himself for saving and changing the world. Straws were not allowed on any of the tables, because in the New World Order only the peasants will receive straws. We must practice sucking right now. U.O. is way ahead of (her/his) time.

[Walter Jr]

I sure hope that Walter knows how to use that generator.

....Whut?

[davidclaytonthomas]

Will you be attending any million men marchs?

[MeeM]

Has anyone heard from judi lately? Hope that Walter is protecting her too.

[scat]

I hope judi has rescued Walter and that they are relaxing where the weather is delightful. Maybe Chicago :-)

[elle]

Wait, Dave's in my hometown???

DC BLOGGERS, UNITE!

[jt]

Knowing Dave's ability to attract hurricanes, should I now be worried that he's in DC, where I am as well?

[Boo Augustus]

El Presidente Supremo Elle, requesting permission to activate SUPER SECRET OPERATION BLUE SHIRT CODE ALPHA THREE.

***KLAXON HORN***

***KAZOO***

ALL DC BLOGGERS ASSEMBLE AT THE CAPITOL STEPS AT 1200 HOURS WHERE WE WILL PROCEED TO CHAIN OURSELVES TO SENATOR FRIST UNTIL DAVE CONSENTS TO MEET WITH US FOR LUNCH AND BUYS US DRINKS.

BRING CASH TO BUY SOPHIE AN ICE CREAM.

***COW BELL***

[MOTW]

Hurricane Magnet does have a nice ring to it, at that.

Novanglus - U.O. is a guy, a manly man writing manly things in a manly manner.

P.S. BTW, I am a female.

[Tamara]

"Yeah, I thot of the upside-down trick, but when I pushed the wrinkles back together, it pretty much worked OK ..."

*SNORRRRKKK!!!*

...I was reading the comments from bottom to top.
...You know what I thought.
*hides face*

[lmd33]

Judi, please check in so we know you're okay.

[snif]

Yeah, well-protected...by an alcoholic pud! Maybe next time you'll lock up the liquor cabinet...

[just sayin']

"Judi, please check in so we know you're okay."

I'm thinking the power is probably out all over south florida.
would be great to get an update from
anyone who might somehow be in touch.

[Novanglus]

God, how I love a manly man who says manly things. Likewise, Only a real man can wear pink ties, use a fan, and suck on a straw.

[TG]

You should have had Jason Whitlock stay in your house during the storm. With him there the house could never blow away.

[El Presidente Supremo Elle]

Corporal Boo,

Commence SUPER SECRET OPERATION BLUE SHIRT CODE ALPHA THREE at ONCE!

Make sure you MOAT-issue uniforms of propeller beanies and coconut bras are in top form.

ONWARD!

[Down in Texas]

El Pres. - I have NO idea what you are talking about. I am curious...and you don't have to answer this but....are you drunk ?

[Brainy Jello]

Tamara - Here.

*Hands Tamara a Mind-in-the-Gutter award*

Congrats - that's like...what, 3 this week?

;)

[elle]

Texas-

It refers to Dave's last DC booksigning, at which a group of DC bloggers showed up wearing coconut brassieres and propeller beanies, which His Daveness most graciously signed.

As for the MOAT, well, you kinda have to be drunk for that....

[Scott in DC]

Dave isn't going to completely miss the effects of Wilma if he's in the DC area tonight and tomorrow. We're supposed to get heavy rain and gusty winds (interaction between Wilma, Alpha, and a cold front) for most of the day. At least this time, FOR ONCE, the hurricane remnants are passing to our east instead of to our west, so we probably won't get a swarm of tornadoes out of it, as has happened several times earlier this year. But we may see snow in the mountains to the west. Betcha didn't know that tropical systems could spawn snowstorms, did ya?

[Charlotte]

We heard from one of our sales reps in the Orlando area and he was on generator, so I'm thinking most of Florida is without power.

[Down in Texas]

Elle - That make sense....in a weird sorta way, although I have a VERY disturbed picture in my head.

[Mr. Completely]

I hope Walter is happy wearing those clothes, because THIS little girl could sure use some.

[Mr. Completely]

Just experimenting to see if this will work. Trying to get a picture to post. If not, then please ignore this.

[Tamara]

Thank you, Brainy! I do <strike>like the attention</strike> try. ;)

[Leetie]

elle and boo:
The eagle soars at midnight and the ramparts will betwixt.

[U.O]

MOTW ... tnx 4 clarifying that ... I gotta admit, there are days when I'm such a sensitive, caring person, that I can't always be sure ...

BOOGER!

There ... that oughta take care of manly comments for a while ...

Novanglus -- well, two outa three ain't bad ... ( I hardly ever wear ties ... but that doesn't mean I wouldn't wear a pink one, should the proper occasion be on the agenda ...)

[elle]

Leetie-

Please grab my mellonballers.

*thinks*

Oh crap, that wasn't even code.

[Tamara]

*snork* @ Elle

[Leetie]

elle...?? mellonballers...???

*is confused*

[elle]

WEren't the mellon ballers supposed to take the place of coconut bras?

Yeesh, I'm getting forgetful...........

[Leetie]

It's all a matter of size.... :)

[JP]

Did anyone else look at that pic of Walter and feel really bad? Actually pitying and wanting to pat the (back?) of what was once the sex organ of a walrus? I know I did, and darned if I'm not proud of it!

[U.O]

For those confused by references to melon ballers:

These kitchen utensils are used when one wishes to ... (ahem, drum roll) ... ball your melons. (Rim shot)

[Keith]

Dave,
Last night channel 10 spent at least a 1/2 hour covering the mess at a water/ice station. Folks were complaining that they received just 3 bottles of water and one bag of ice. Some waited in line for 12 hours to obtain the little reward. My question is: How did they run out of water so quickly? For 5 days (or was it five months) we were advised to put some water into some clean containers to quench our post-Wilma thirst. I figure, given a human being of average physiology, that they lost more water waiting in line than they got at the end of the line. Oh yes, though, it was free. Is that what drove them to this line of infinite length and a net loss - it's FREE. Next they'll be out of gas having driven who knows how far to get some free water. Looks like a big net loss playing this game. The "news" played this as FEMA treating the public badly. "W" will be down to straighten it out soon.
Public, next time put some water into bottles so channel 10 has less dribble to dribble. I'll have less to dribble about too!