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September 30, 2005


A Super Typhoon is penetrating (Har!) Asia. We're thinking Walter should cover this one.

(Thanks to many people)


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Does'nt look to be too deep....

Longwang Mode !!!

Typhoon's get better names than hurricanes - Katrina and Rita are such harmless, innocent-sounding names. Longwang, on the other hand, is so much more, well, prominent

I hope it stays away from Shandong.... that's a sword fight I don't wanna be around

Looks like a penis to me...when will it be up on Snopes?

If they just let it over drink, it will disappear. Either that or they could microwave it and it will just burn out.

I'm surprised that you and the posters thinks this storm is funny. Perhaps I'm wrong, but it looks every bit as dangerous as Katrina and Rita. Storms that hit the USA are BAD, but storrs that hit Asia are FUNNY ?

Rocky --
You raise a good point. I don't think any suffering caused by the storm is funny. I do think the storm name is funny.

Yes, the name is very funny. In a penetrating sort of way.

Speaking from past experience, maybe if we laugh at it, it will 'peter' out.

"This is Walter the oosik reporting live from Tiawan where local municipalities are bracing for what may be the most devastating storm of what has already been a bad year in tropical storms. Super typhoon...wait (what is this, a joke?)...(paper shuffling)... Super typhoon Long(muffled laughter)...ha ha ha ha... excuse me. Super typhoon Long ha ha WANG a HA HA HA ha ha whoo!... Sorry. Super Typhhh! *gasp* Aaaah ha ha ha ha ha. Sorry."

rocky5: storrs that hit Asia are actually really really hilarious, but storms that do so are not.



Rocky, you didn't know Dave Barry is the Bill Bennett of comedy? What foreign inferior country did you just arrive from?

I don't get it...why is the name "Longwang" funny?


Harry Dingus
Sensitivity Outreach Coordinator,
Society of Unfortunate Names

Weather (sic) we laugh at the storm's name or not, it is going to hit where it hits and do the damage it does. Meanwhile, we juvies can laugh at Longwang until we turn blue.

If "Rita" was a sexual innuendo, we certainly would laugh at it, too.

Plus, it should be noted (oh should it?) that "Katrina" and "Rita" translate to "Inverted Nipples" and "Butterscotch Rectum" in an Asian type language I recently made up.

You can't tell me they* weren't doing some giggling, not over the storms' impact(s), but their names.

*Note: For purposes of this post, "they" will be Barry Manilow, Cher, Britney Spears, and Paris Hilton, who remain on the international People it's always okay to joke about list.

Well, what do you expect sending 2 ravishing female hurricanes into the gulf? It was only a matter of time before Longwang showed up. And don't tell me the umbilical cord impersonation and pureed squid gonads weren't involved!

And I'd also like to blame the Japanese Mafia for this. Or Al Queda. And if we can find a way to blame it on FEMA, that's even better.

"You raise a good point. I don't think any suffering caused by the storm is funny."

Dave, hypothetically speaking (which can cause drymouth and uncontrollable yodeling in certain subjects, void where prohibited, similar to sugar pill), if Michael Jackson were to accidentally microwave his Johnson in a panic trying to prepare for super typhoon Long Wang, would that be funny (provided no oompa-loompas were harmed in the filming of same, and all appropriate waivers had been signed)?

Also, it goes without saying that I would be willing to sign a guitar and auction it off to help MJ get Chinese medical attention for his Johnson. Even if the above scenerio failed to actually occur.

Dave is so far the only media person I have seen acknowledge that tropical storms can occur in the Pacific too. Care to guess how much media time Longwang will generate in North America if it causes significant destruction in China? I think we've already seen it.

PS. Christobol, you must be using some obscure dialect. I thought that "Katrina" meant "perverted Snapple" and "Rita" meant "candy-coated hemorrhoids."

That's what you get for using Babelfish.

Nevermind that you happen to be right this time.

It would also be a good name for a new car model. As men, we would hope to brag: "I have a Longwang."


Maybe. But its Blue Book (har!) value would be low. Who would want to say, I just bought a used Longwang.

"My Longwang needs a lube job" would probably not be a good pickup line.

But Longwang hits Afganistan would be a fun little rhyme as would Glooscap the Micmac needs his paddywack smacked.

Speaking as a Katrina survivor to all: thanks for making me laugh so I won't cry! Humor is a great de-stressor.
That is all.

since the computer model is "not to be used for planning purposes", we can only assume it produces phallic shapes for the amusement of the people wondering if longwang's big blow will hit them. if it does perhaps they should just swallow hard and make the best of it.

if Longwang meets up with high pressure, he could discharge copious amounts of fluid and result in a depression...

this has been the weather, brought to you by P***** pharmaceuticals, makers of you-know-what

Looks like China is going to get f~@ked!!

I wish you morons would freaking grow up! Seriously! Hung Lo



I am reminded of a bit from an old (1970s) movie ("Kentucky Fried Movie" I think) about a martial arts contest between "Long Wang, Hung Low and, from the United States, Enormous Genitals!"

sorry guys, my husband is at this moment headed into taipei and i am concerned for his safety as well as those on the plane with him...cant joke about the name, and i lived there and thought names like that were funny...until now...

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