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August 24, 2005


Now they're using parakeets.

(Thanks to Eleanor)


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clearly the parakeet was the criminal mastermind behind the entire operation

Uno! and
"An employee, Bill Birdsell ..."
was robbed by a BIRD? oh my.

Well of COURSE Bill got hit! His name is BIRDSELL...the parakeet made them do it.


Dangit...curses, foiled again.

This is just like Bonnie & Clyde. If Clyde was a bird.

on the header of that page from the Des Moines Register click on news

from the drop down menu click on people and places

then scroll down to an important article about


Way to go, Eleanor!

If he was a large green bird, I doubt it was a parakeet. More likely it was a ... HEY! How did you get in my office? Stop pecking at me! ARGH!

In one of the more unusual holdups Des Moines has seen in a while

In a while? What robbery was more unusual? What did we miss that makes the bird-on-the-shoulder bandits seem ordinary?

rick h ~ That has got to be one of the best mullet articles ever.

Those poor children.

"That!" she screamed, pointing with her cigarette across the stage at Jacobson's haircut, "Is a shag!"

That is mulletude.

Thanks for the heads up, rick.

did the robber have an eyepatch and wear a bandanna?

"I be here to plunder your store, et cetera."

*get it? heads up? mullet?*

Oh, look! Something shiny!

Hey Dave, Has the crocodile in LA ate an illegal yet? I've been waiting to hear good news.

No pics of the prized mullets?!! What a rip!!

she was shopping for a cookie jar. in a hardware store. with a pierced eyebrow. and a big green bird on her shoulder. are we sure this wasn't some kind of initiation? maybe she needed the money for nylons.

Let me mullet over for a while . . .


Birdsell....more like Birdstole.....

An employee, Bill Birdsell, had been hit in the face and was on the floor. "I could tell right away Bill had been hurt," Zaun said.

Wow, with incredible powers of observation like that Ms. Zaun is a shoe-in for Fantastic Four II.

In the article rick pointed out, I like the way the writer felt the need to define mullet-ude, in case we weren't sure what he meant by that!!!!

*wonders what the demographic of the newspaper is*


Thanks, Tamara rhymes with camera!! :)

I think The Coast States must be really getting full, because all the weirdos are moving to Iowa. Jillywilly, louis, et al, it's time to leave. I suggest we open a Relocated Iowans colony somewhere in South Dakota. They have plenty of room up there. And if we're lucky, we can settle on a missle silo site, and become a feared nuclear power! We'll draw straws to see you gets to push the button.

to see WHO gets to push the button.


Polly want a felony?

I'm sure they ditched the parrot.

On the lookout for two pierced suspects, birdshit on their shoulders.

Way to Go Elaynieaor!!

I nude you could do it, what with you and your fine para keets!

its almpst time for talk like a pirate day, too....arrrghh


What happened to your "air", sweet one???

Congrats, El!!

Everything else I've had to say has already been said. Even the suggestion this was a rite of initiation.

Eleanor is my heroin.

*sneaks over to window and tosses out parakeet*

What? I don't have a bird!

Awwk, pieces of eight, awwk.

*looks at assorted Pirates lined up at the Police Station*

Sergant: "Number 1, please step forward!"

Sue Zaun: "Na, didn't have a peg leg.

Sergant: "Number 2, please look to your left!"

Sue Zaun: "Hum, eye patch and bandana? Could be."

Sergant: "Ok, number 3! Please stand straight, arms to your sides!"

Sue Zaun: "Hooked hand? NO WAY!"

Sergant: "Number 4..."

Sue Zaun: "WOW! Where'd he get THAT beard color from!? Natural? MY BUTT!"

Sergant: "All right. Number 5, straighten up!

Sue Zaun: "Hey! That parrot's DEAD! D E A D DEAD! He's been stapled to the coat!"

Sergant: "Well..."

Sue Zaun: "And what's this guy doing with a Wabbit?"

Wabbit: "SEE!?" *chomp, chomp*

Sergant: "Number 7? Grandma?"

Sue Zaun: "NOW a bungie!? THAT'S streaching it a bit, don't cha think?"

Grandma: "Slyvester! Get away from that cage!"

its a lot funnier if it's a dead parrot stapled to her coat. calling eric idle.. help out here and write us an updated parrot sketch!

Hey, I sent the parakeet thing in yesterday afternoon (see Wacky Canadian comments). What's up with that?

*Stomps off in a huff*

Birdsell?? that name sounds familiar... I grew up there.... maybe Greenie our Parakeet has been resurrected....

Rick R. -- why doncha check in on the Board sometime, ole pal, ole buddy..???

As for Iowa becoming a Nuclear Power.. HEY!! That's OUR big Attraction in ND... we're #3, we're #3, we're #3.....

Still Evil, the Baroness...

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