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August 31, 2005


Blogging will be sparse today, as The Blog has limited power, and the s.b. is loath to attempt humor on such a day. But perhaps certain things are inherently funny: The Noble Ostrich, for example.

(Thanks to Layla Bohm)


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An ostrich is easier to keep than a goldfish

Maybe, but I bet it's WAY harder to flush them down the toilet.

Wait...I was told The Blog had unlimited power.

Otherwise how do you explain the absolute corruption?

Hello, is this President Allstate? I'm with Love Farms. My rescued ostrich's butt just broke thru my van window and ... hello? Can you hear me?"

I don't know how to send forward this headline to you, but see if you can check out AOL's current "News" page. Their link to the oil reserve story is
Makes Move to Ease Gas Pain"
This is as of 12:27 p.m. Chicago time.
Maybe I just have an unfortunate mind (of COURSE I do, or I wouldn't be here); but this struck me as a kind of...clinical?...description.
(And before you think I'm an insensitive wretch, I've already sent my contribution to the Red Cross.)

Betsy - good one!

Dave - My firewall prevents me form viewing your ostrich story...but I'm sure it's hysterical.
*removes lips from ass*
If you run out of auxillary power, you may have to dip into Mrs Blog's, um, personal appliance batteries... good luck!

Punkin - best line in the article which is about an ostrich that fell out of a van on the Golden Gate Bridge in S.F.:

Ziese said the bird suffered "minor road rash"

Is that like "rug burn"?

just wonderin'....

Thanks, Eleanor!

Did the road burn smell like chicken?

Eleanor --

Thanks for the "shout-out" the other day. It IS good to be back (read: have electricity).

And, yes, rug burn and road rash are somewhat similar. Road rash more typically occurs when a motorcyclist flips his bike and goes sliding for 100 feet. Sometimes on his face. (You get the idea.)

As the the "ostrich-on-the-bridge" story: Geez, you'd think those rubber-neckers never saw a six-foot tall bird on the hoof before. After all, it IS San Francisco. I have seen MANY things whenever visiting there - most of which I cannot descibe in polite (blog) company.

Dear Blog,
I know in these trying times it is hard to laugh and way to easy to cry. I do however want to thank Judi and Dave. Over the past few days my eyes have been glued to the TV watching this sensless destruction and it is almost impossible to get away from it. This blog and Dave's books have been an Island of laughter that I sorely need. Thank you for everything you have done,
Addicted to 24

do ya suppose mr hooper was out looking for big bird???

By the way, "The Noble Ostrich" would be a good name for a rock band.

Did anyone else think of that King of the Hill episode where Hanks boss needed him to "get" his Emu's?

Ok, asking the unanswerable question - Who keeps TWO ostriches inside their MINIVAN?

Who would have thought that an ostrich was a flight risk?

Oh, excellent, Bruce! When you can get a line like that off after 14 or so earlier comments, you just know your mind doesn't work like anyone else's!

Maybe it was looking for its friend the California Croc... it was just too far north, that's all.

I've been noticing a trend on the blog. Seems like everytime the Blog says that blogging will be sparse, there seems to be more blogging than normal. That being the case, please keep up the sparse blogging!

"Strange things always seem to happen with ostriches." The new hit single from Road Rash, AGNFARB

*is still snorking at "flight risk"*

The ostrich just wanted to make it into one of Punky's stories; why should the emu have all the fun? Speaking of which, has anybody seen the emu lately?

"The Ostrich's Butt" WBAGNFA tavern.
I was riding home with my mom a few years ago, on the way back from visting family. I was looking out the window and I saw an emu running down the road--in Arkansas! I couldn't even think of the word for such an outlandish sight, and just said, "A large flightless bird!"

Who else thinks that Russia bears walking the streets, and the vodka flows like water?
And anyone can know that in this country the most beautiful girls?

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