Post a comment
Your Information
(Name is required. Email address will not be displayed with the comment.)
« Previous | Main | Next »
July 19, 2005
Comments
You can follow this conversation by subscribing to the comment feed for this post.
Verify your Comment
Previewing your Comment
Your comment could not be posted. Error type:
Your comment has been posted. Post another comment
As a final step before posting your comment, enter the letters and numbers you see in the image below. This prevents automated programs from posting comments.
Having trouble reading this image? View an alternate.
'I won't let my eight-year-old daughter Rosaline go in the sea now so we're forced to spend the whole time at the hotel pool.'
The poor baby. She'll be scarred for life.
(and first?)
Posted by: Moe | July 19, 2005 at 07:25 AM
that was a stinging response, Moe!
Posted by: insomniac | July 19, 2005 at 07:33 AM
Great picture of the girl holding the net and a pan of (assumably) jellyfish ... except they're clear, and therefore not really photogenic.
Posted by: LM | July 19, 2005 at 07:38 AM
"Some people suffer allergic reactions which require immediate medical attention. Young people and those with heart conditions or asthma are at particular risk."
Same warning posted at Space Mountain at DisneyWorld.
Posted by: Amy | July 19, 2005 at 07:40 AM
I got stung by a jelly fish a while back on a vacation to Galveston Island. It ain't fun! Hundreds (really) of tiny welts on my leg that burned for days. We stopped in the local convenience store for advice. The recommended treatment? Adolph's Meat Tenderizer (I'm not making that up).
Posted by: Zaphod | July 19, 2005 at 07:43 AM
And, based on personal bias, Stinging Jellyfish wNOTbagnfarb.
Posted by: Zaphod | July 19, 2005 at 07:49 AM
Grandma always said "If life hands you jelly fish, make peanut butter and jelly fish sandwiches!"
Of course, Grandma hated us with an epic fierceness.
Posted by: Christobol | July 19, 2005 at 07:51 AM
"craspedacusta sowerbii"... nothing a little Monostat can't get rid of....
Posted by: Punkin Poo | July 19, 2005 at 07:56 AM
Did anyone notice the name of the newspaper carrying this article?
*Ahem*
Stop at the shop at the top of Shropshire.
That is all.
Posted by: Edelweiss | July 19, 2005 at 07:59 AM
The problem has been caused by swarms of the mauve stinger.
Since mauve is NOT a color found in nature and was accidentally discovered by a scientist looking for something else, how could a jellyfish possibly be mauve?
Discuss.
Posted by: Class Teacher | July 19, 2005 at 08:01 AM
Zaphod: I dunno about jellyfish, but application of a paste made of Adolph's and a bit of water is a time-honored way of treating bee and wasp stings. Used it several times myself. So it was probably good advice -- question is, did you take it?
As for me, I'd rather have Grandma's snake-bite remedy anytime: lick of salt, shot of tequila, bite of lime, apply suction to snake bite. Actual snake bite optional.
Posted by: WriterDude | July 19, 2005 at 08:14 AM
a song for Sophie Lines...
(hint:think Peter Gabriel)
Fishing down at Radbrook Green
I wasn't getting any bites
Though I'm just a normal teen
I haven't seen too many sights
They were something to observe
Floating there, without a sound
They got no muscle, got no nerve
Measuring an inch around.
I could not believe all the media
Looking in the encyclopedia
My heart going boom, boom, boom
Hey, they said,'You can keep those things, we're
off to bug Prince Charles!
To free my jellyfish is my plan
The Amazon's where they should be
The English winter's not so grand
For Craspedacusta sowerbii
If I'm hard to understand
'Bout things you can barely see
Their jelly-wish is my command
Though stingerless, they control me!
Today it's England, then the whole world
A spineless banner will be unfurled
Our hearts going boom, boom,boom
They say, "You vertebrates have really screwed
things up!"
Posted by: insomniac | July 19, 2005 at 08:14 AM
"Red Cross workers treated more than 1400 holidaymakers...."
Those dang holidaymakers...I've been lookin fer 'em fer days. I wanted to know if they can make Friday a holiday, I need me some time off...
"...student was all of a quiver when she discovered..."
WTF???? I was a student when I discovered something in my pants that made me all of a quiver and did that event make the news??? HECK NO!! And yet, it was the single most important discovery of my life!
Posted by: casey | July 19, 2005 at 08:15 AM
"Red Cross workers treated more than 1400 holidaymakers...."
Those dang holidaymakers...I've been lookin fer 'em fer days. I wanted to know if they can make Friday a holiday, I need me some time off...
"...student was all of a quiver when she discovered..."
WTF???? I was a student when I discovered something in my pants that made me all of a quiver and did that event make the news??? HECK NO!! And yet, it was the single most important discovery of my life!
Posted by: casey | July 19, 2005 at 08:16 AM
oh, by the way, everyone knows you are supposed to pee on a jelly fish sting. I try to find the most attractive male lifeguard and with a bat of my lush lashes, say "hey, hun, wanna pee on my sting?"
Posted by: casey | July 19, 2005 at 08:17 AM
OH NO, the dreaded double post! Sorry ya'll, it must have been the quiver...
Posted by: casey | July 19, 2005 at 08:18 AM
Christobol, sounds like Grandma hated you with an epicurean fierceness as well.
BTW, Swarms of the Mauve Stinger wbagnfa pretentious 80's new wave band.
Posted by: qetzal | July 19, 2005 at 08:18 AM
WD - Yes, I took the advice. The store kept the Adolphs on the shelf along with band-aids, aspirin, and other medical supplies. The poltice took away some of the burning sensation, but it was 5-6 months before the welts disappeared.
Posted by: Zaphod | July 19, 2005 at 08:22 AM
Let it be known that 'Stinging Jellyfish' = 'Jiggly flesh isn't in' . . .
Posted by: M.C. | July 19, 2005 at 08:25 AM
Bravo, Insomnia and Christobol.
BTW, did anyone happen to think (uncharitably, to be sure) that the last several hundred of the 1400 stung might not be the sharpest tools in the shed? Or, as usual, was it just me?
Posted by: jamester | July 19, 2005 at 08:43 AM
Zaph - the active ingredient in Adolph's is... Ta da dah da dah! ...Monosodium Glutamate! It works by sort of breaking down tissue - yours.
But you'll be much more tasty.
Posted by: pogo | July 19, 2005 at 08:48 AM
Idiot #1: Hey! I just got stung by a jellyfish!
Idiot #2: Where is it?!?
Idiot #1: (pointing) Right there!
Idiot #2: I don’t see it!
Idiot #1: Here, I’ll pick it up…OW!
Idiot #2: I’ll get it…
Etcetera, etcetera, Pete, Repeat and the whole gang.
Posted by: VictoriaE77 | July 19, 2005 at 08:49 AM
I was stung by a jellyfish in Hawaii. The lifeguard's recommendation? Urine He told me to put pee on my leg.
I've never seen my younger brother so eager to help out with anything in his life.
Posted by: elle | July 19, 2005 at 09:10 AM
My Aunt would take a spray bottle with 1 part amonia to 4 parts water to the beach at Tybee Island. Get stung, spray the area, and no need to get little brothers involved.
Posted by: BigD� | July 19, 2005 at 09:14 AM
Fresh water jellyfish? That is so not fair. Now I have to add to my list of fears the fear that the rare Amazonian jellyfish will make its way up to Lake Michigan and sting my a$$.
Posted by: PollyPI | July 19, 2005 at 09:17 AM
"The warmer temperature, the more jellyfish there are."
Everyone may now cease panicking.
I have contacted some friends in the Royal Mounted and Funny-Hatted Penguin Brigade and had glaciers dispatched to Costa del Sol, Costa Blanca, Costa Rica, Bob Costas, the Balearic Islands, the Lethargic Islands, the Canary Islands, the Unladen African Swallow Islands and New Jersey. Just doing my patriotic duty.
Posted by: Federal Duck | July 19, 2005 at 09:22 AM
"Balearic Islands environment minister Jaume Font has ordered an investigation into the jellyfish plague."
Jaume Font: (not to be confused with Arial Font) I order you to investigate the jellyfish plague.
*several weeks and millions of dollars later*
Scientific-Looking Person: Mr. or Ms. Font, as the case may be: We have discovered that you actually can ignight flatulence! Also, there is a freaking plague of jellyfish. That will be all.
Posted by: Federal Duck | July 19, 2005 at 09:26 AM
Ignite as well. *grumble not paying attention grumble*
Posted by: Federal Duck | July 19, 2005 at 09:30 AM
Thanks, Fed
Avast! As Talk Like a Pirate Day approached we found ourselves becalmed in the Lethargic Islands, where the scurvy crew fell about committing Mopery and Gapery on the High Seas and we knew we'd all be keel hauled and hanged.
Posted by: pogo | July 19, 2005 at 09:32 AM
When I was a kid, my brothers and I used to have jellyfish fights which is when we would pick up jellyfish (they don't sting from the top) and fling them merrily at each other and then try to make it to the other side of the beach before our little brother could run crying to mom so we could then try to deny we were involved at all.
This kind of behaviour is a sad side effect for Canadian children who are left exposed to the elements for too long.
Posted by: Somewhere North | July 19, 2005 at 09:35 AM
LOL i just saw that movie Dave Barry...my husband just loves your newspaper comments, hes a real fan of yours!
LOL you make me laugh...right now, i needed a good laugh! you really crack me up! love you! :-)
Posted by: Kathy Trejo | July 19, 2005 at 09:47 AM
I, for one, welcome our new jellyfish masters!
Posted by: insomniac | July 19, 2005 at 09:59 AM
"What the hell are you doing peeing on my leg!?"
"Sorry, I thought you'd been stung by a jelly fish."
"In line at a WalMart?"
"I said I was sorry, didn't I?"
Posted by: Christobol | July 19, 2005 at 10:18 AM
Is it big news that there are freshwater jellyfish? The pond at my daughter's Girl Scout camp in Indiana is full of 'em, 'bout the size of a quarter. I was surprised, having grown up in sunny Florida, but the locals dismissed my excitement.
Should I contact the jellyfish police? And where would I find them?
Posted by: neatfreak | July 19, 2005 at 10:51 AM
C-bol, C-bol, C-bol ...
LOL! LOL! LOL!
(In line at a WalMart?)
Posted by: U.O | July 19, 2005 at 12:59 PM
Technically, I'm not sure you can call anything living in a body of water where people swim a "fresh water" entity.
How much salt is in urine?
Posted by: Christobol | July 19, 2005 at 01:02 PM
There's the Robert Klein routine where his mom tells all the kids how long they have to wait after eating before swimming based on what they ate. "Jello? Ten Minutes. " "Hot Dog? Two hours."
"Franks and beans? You can never can in the water again."
For 10 years, I bet it was something Mexican.
Posted by: insomniac | July 19, 2005 at 09:05 PM