GREETINGS!

"Honey, someone sent you a Christmas card. Shall I open it for you?"

(Thanks to Samco Dispatch)

Update: Apparently that link requires registration; here's one that doesn't)

Comments

[Dave (not Barry)]

have to register. t'aint gonna! sorry :-(

[Marvin]

"One morning at breakfast, Cathy Gallagher told her husband she wanted to start a line of greeting cards for adulterers."

Wonder where she got the idea from...

[Mahatma Kane Jeeves]

Could somebody copy the article in the comments if it's not too long?

[Mahatma Kane Jeeves]

Could somebody copy the article in the comments if it's not too long?

[Marvin]

use bugmenot. (I've even saved you the trouble of copying over the URL. the only way I could make it easier on you people would be to copy/paste the email address and password, but honestly I don't feel like being that accomodating.)

[Atticus]

"Look at how many people on soap operas are having affairs. That's real."

Soap operas are REAL? Great, now I have an evil twin!

[Dave (not Barry)]

thanks Marvin :-)

[just sayin']

hmmm, methinks that one who peeks behind doors may have stood behind them.

[kibby F5�]

*wants to set up web camera (rymes with Tamara)in the WalMart isle*

[Christobol]

I wonder if she'll expand.

Like, can I buy cheater "Mother's Day" cards?

While I'm eating three bean salad with my birth mother today, I'll be thinking of you.

[Eleanor]

Best line:

And now I can't imagine my life without you ... Even if I have to share you."
*snork*

[M.C.]

"You don't have to be a murderer to write a murder mystery," she says.

You don't have to be an alcoholic to have a good time on the Fourth of July either, but it sure helps. Wonder where she gets her inspiration... it seems like a touchy subject:

While we're both eating roast beef with our grandmas I'm totally going to be thinking about..." You get the rest.

[kibby F5�]

When Santa's checking his list twice...

I'll be thinking who else is NICE!

[Punkin Poo]

She's got a point about there being a market for this kind of thing...I wrote a Mother's Day card for people with crappy mothers...

"This is just a note to say,
Have a Happy Mother's Day!
But please don't call me,
Don't drop by,
Just stay at home,
Eat sh*t and die"

[insomniac]

"Just dropped you a line to say
You'd look great in a scarlet 'A'"

"We lost track of where our mouths and hands went
As we broke the Seventh Commandment"

"And years from now, you'll still look swell
When we're burning forever in Dante's Hell.

[M.C.]

Even though I'm not with you
My feelings for my spouse are through
And even though you're my new girl
My consort bloody makes me hurl
But even though I love you more
I can't divoce this f*cking wh*re
So even though we screwed last night
This Holiday belongs to Wife

XOXO,
Mr. Smith

P.S. I love you, but whatever you do don't call me.

[Aunt Nancy]

Insom - you should start your own card line, and call it "Brutally Honest Greetings" or something.

Meanwhile...*SNORK*

[Aunt Nancy]

M.C. - maybe you can Insom can go into business together. The card business!

Meanwhile...*SNORK* to you too, also.

[Eleanor]

M.C. Very funny, but the sad part of it is that it's true!!! Or not sad, I guess, depending on your P.O.V.

[Bill B]

Actually, the Baltimore Sun site really tweaked me. My browser had their cookie and my password program filled in the relevant info, but it was rejected! They wanted me to reregister for a site I visit maybe once a year at most. When will these corporations learn not to torture online users with this nonsense?

Thanks!

[M.C.]

Thanks, Nancy.

Sad but true indeed, Eleanor.

Now which is worse? That 'card' or the fact that insom and I aren't making thousands of dollars for coming up with more just like it? ;-)

[Tamara]

Punkin! I'll take one for each major holiday, please. :)

Insom - Hilarious as always! :)

[Eleanor]

*zips in very smug*

They didn't ask me to register - and I got to read the article -
just saying'....

M.C. - both...

[Maud]

My Dearest (fill in name)

Tho' I spend hols and vacations with kids and wife
I swear that you are the love of my life
Tho' I go home every night to my wife's bed
I swear my love life with her is dead

I'd leave her right now, honest I would
But I'd have to give up some material goods
I know you love me too much to want that
So ignore your friends who say I'm a rat

Don't call, or write, or send one of these cards
Just dream of all we're heading towards
I'll always be yours, across years love you still
But my wife gets the house; you're not in the will