BEFORE THE INTERNET...

There was no Viagra.

(Thanks to golfwidow)

Comments

[VictoriaE77]

Well, they had to worship something...

[gina.g]

Damn metric system, is it a big willie or not?

[Mike]

The 28,000 year old Phallus was found next to a 27,999 year old tube of lubricant.

[TCK]

20 cm = just under 8 inches, but 3 cm = only about 1 inch

was neandrathal man really tall and skinny?

[Federal Duck]

"Eureka, I've discovered a prehistoric phallic statue! It must be a monument to the fertility gods, or an ancient altar to reproduction, or...."

"It looks like a lump of rock."

"Oh, the grant money, the fame and fortune and nubile women and...."

"Hey...it's not even one lump of rock. You just crazy-glued a bunch of pebbles together, didn't you?"

"Talk shows, scientific magazines and.... what?"

"This phallus. It's got your initials engraved in the base."

".......um, Eureka! A prehistoric phallus that foretold its own discovery from 28,000 years ago!"

"I quit."

[Somewhere North]

Now that's a vibrator. No wonder they worshipped it.

[DM]

Who says they worshipped it. Cavemen were utilitarian.

[crossgirl]

" the Hohle Fels cave"

is that a euphemism for stone vagina?

can i say vagina without conjuring the lady with the facts?

[Maud]

I found this article quite surprising. Apparently, men didn't start worshipping their d*cks until their initial 4,000 year fascination with birds had worn off.

[TCK]

Maud - this particular phallus could not have been made for men to worship - otherwise it would've been way bigger

[insomniac]

translated it means:
"Once you've had Neanderthal
you won't be able to stand at all."

[Dave (not Barry)]

the article forgot to mention that all archeologists had to be at least 18 to enter the cave- and behind a stone counter they found the mummufied remains of a scraggly haired guy reading a porn mag and chewing gum.

[Amy]

I'd like to find the statue that belonged to that.

[Drew]

Isn't it ironic that the other old thing found there was also a "bird"?

[Lisa]

Neanderthal women had to keep entertained while Neanderthal men were off on mammoth hunts.

[Kilmeny]

Coming soon to the Museum of Science: Marital Aids of the Paeolithic Era.

[M.C.]

TCK - Thanks for the unit conversions.

[Christobol]

Zug: Look honey, me invent donut holder!

Glug: That not as good as Thad's wheel.

Zug: Me think I stick donut holder up Thad's oog-pie for him.

Glug: Put that thing away before company come, it look like winkus.

[spinner8]

How do we know the "bird" was not just an early attempt to make a phallus and it took another 4,000 years to get it recognizable (there being some delays getting the beta test version returned by the testers)?

[lollyk]

gina.g,
thanks alot, i snorked iced coffee all over my screen.

[pegger]

28,000 years old? Someone keeps telling me that the world is only 6,000 years old...what gives?

[Jeff Meyerson]

Was somebody actually looking for this?

Excellent, insomniac. (And the rest of you are doing good too. Thanks.)

[Targetgirl]

Pegger, start poking Someone repeatedly with a long sharp stick. Then they should quit bothering you with misinformation.

[ceeg22]

Lisa -- that's what I was thinking! apparently length was more important to her than girth. maybe her hubby was short and stout and this one was for variety?

[Aunt Nancy]

*reads C'bol's post*

SNORK

*goes to find paper towels and windex to clean soda from monitor and keyboard*

My husband is gonna be so angry...

[golfwidow]

Whee, I got Clairemartined again.

I wanted to make a joke about Viagra, really old sexual appliances made from rocks, Stonehenge, and Bob Dole here, but I couldn't think of anything.

[I Hear Dread People]

MAUD: OMG! I think I strained something. Other than the Diet Squirt through the nostrils-bwaaahhhhHAHA!

[slyeyes]

Is "Baden-Wuertemberg" German for Really Old Morton?"

[golfwidow again]

Okay, no one's "gone there" so I will.

Gives "busting stones" a whole new meaning.

There may also be a Mick Jagger joke in there somewhere, but I've had too much beer to look for it.

[alanboss]

A 28,000 year old erection?!?!? That guy should consult his doctor!

[Idle WarShip]

How is it possible that DAYS later, I'm the first to say that, Stone Phallus may just be the best nfarb that I've heard in a long (no pud idtended) time.

[Blikkster]

According to God the planet is very young and there's no such thing as the phallus, therefore it's wrong, no Dinosaurs they're invented, God created T.V. (chapter 13 Torbius Victorias). In conclusion there's no such thing as cave men, men, or this Wo-man thing i keep hearing about. Infact i don't even think i'm real, we are all energies of the cosmos man!