WHY THE WORLD NEEDS LAWYERS
Because without them, there would be no justice.
(Thannks to Theresa Valentine)
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June 17, 2005
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We need more facts. How did the ketchup get on his pants?
Posted by: sandy beach | June 17, 2005 at 01:43 PM
Would you like fries with that?
Posted by: slyeyes | June 17, 2005 at 01:46 PM
Would someone please stick that lawyer's head in an Indipod?
Posted by: Aunt Nancy | June 17, 2005 at 01:51 PM
It's good to ketchup with news in the legal community.
Echoes of Monicagate?
Posted by: D'Artagnan | June 17, 2005 at 02:02 PM
It goes without saying but is worth saying anyway: Does ANYone wonder why baristers have a bad name?!
Posted by: Trystan Shout | June 17, 2005 at 02:03 PM
It goes without saying but is worth saying anyway: Does ANYone wonder why baristers have a bad name?!
Posted by: Trystan Shout | June 17, 2005 at 02:13 PM
King Wingbipeekaboo has a very good name.
Posted by: King Wingbipeekaboo HCGSPTFCS | June 17, 2005 at 02:26 PM
Although I enjoy ketchup I find this story quite tasteless.
Posted by: M.C. | June 17, 2005 at 02:42 PM
Ketchup on his pants
'Pay my cleaning bill, biatch!'
I slash his tires
Posted by: snif | June 17, 2005 at 03:17 PM
See, this is EXACTLY why I make fun of lawyers all the time, well, besides the fact that my brother-in-law is one: they have no perspective on reality
Posted by: silver | June 17, 2005 at 03:20 PM
*hangs head in shame*
I pay all my own dry cleaning bills, no matter who stained my clothes! Or how they stained them!
*hee, hee, I said stained*
Posted by: FCDA | June 17, 2005 at 04:23 PM
Hey Kingy Wingy - did you know that, according to Barrylore, you owe the Federal Government $50,000 for each unnecessary letter that follows your name? (I'm assuming those letters are educationally related.) This is supposed to help reduce the federal deficit. You can expect a bill for $450,000 from the IRS any day now.
Posted by: Aunt Nancy | June 17, 2005 at 04:31 PM
Of course, if it weren't for the ketchup stain, the barrister would never have gotten his pants cleaned again. (That's why the rest of the legal firm liked to call him "Stinky")
Posted by: wendell | June 17, 2005 at 04:37 PM
Of course, if it weren't for the ketchup stain, the barrister would never have gotten his pants cleaned again. (That's why the rest of the legal firm liked to call him "Stinky")
Posted by: wendell | June 17, 2005 at 04:37 PM
i expect this will be a reality show fairly soon.
Posted by: queensbee | June 17, 2005 at 04:45 PM
"Will the counsel approach to the bench?
Have you a fondness for fries French?
You're covered with Heinz
See how your stain shines!
I can't begin to imagine the stench!"
The shamed lawyer searched for his excuse.
"My secretary fouled my caboose.
Soon I'll be rid of her,
Res ipsa loquitur
She's clumsy and won't stand my abuse."
But the lawyer had shifted the blame
Lust burned in his mind like a flame
He showed her each trouser
In the hope it'd arouse her.
She said,"What's underneath is quite tame."
Posted by: insomniac | June 17, 2005 at 05:36 PM
Bravo!
insom - you are a credit to the legal profession, and we are designating you as our Honorary Attorney Magna Cum Laude!
Posted by: FCDA | June 17, 2005 at 05:55 PM
Has he filed a suit against her yet for assaulting him with the ketchup? How about slapping her with a lawsuit for defaming his character? Is that the right term Eleanor? (I doubt that he needed help getting his character defamed.)
Is anyone else getting email that appears to be from roadrunner, but states "your services near to be closed" in the subject line?
Posted by: Jessica R. | June 17, 2005 at 06:22 PM
Jess - I think the Assault (and Battery) with Ketchup would hold up in Court, but as you say, it doesn't appear that he has any character to defame! :)
Legal Definition of battery: the unlawful touching (even with ketchup) of another
unless of course, he consented!
Posted by: FCDA | June 17, 2005 at 06:48 PM
Someone go to my blog and direct me to the MOAT. Please. Or wherever the hangout is now.
Posted by: Jessica R. | June 17, 2005 at 06:49 PM
Lawyer joke from long ago ...
"I got in trouble when I called a lawyer 'pond scum'."
"What happened?"
"Pond scum is suing me for defamation of character."
Posted by: U.O | June 17, 2005 at 07:52 PM
NOTE: THE FOLLOWING IS NOT A CRITICISM, ESPECIALLY OF ST. JUDI, OR DAVE, OR ANYONE ... MERELY A CURIOUSITY-TYPE QUESTION ON AN OBSERVATION OF PHENOMENA.
If all the porn and medication spam was deleted from the MOAT, would it still be huge enuf to be the MOAT?
(Sure is a lot of it there ...)
Posted by: U.O | June 17, 2005 at 08:01 PM
What do you want to bet that, after the firm is finished "investigating" that the secretary will be fired for leaking a "confidential" email?
Posted by: alanboss | June 17, 2005 at 10:13 PM
And,hey! Even though I have finally, after being around here for pretty much ever, I have learned the meanings of most of the codes, I still don't know, What the hell is the MOAT?
Posted by: alanboss | June 17, 2005 at 10:16 PM
alanboss,
Mother Of All Threads
tnx to U.O who explained it to me.
Posted by: Cynthia | June 17, 2005 at 11:04 PM
King W
No he doesn't!
it's a hex
you used to be seriously funny....um...
Posted by: not sayin' | June 18, 2005 at 12:56 AM
Goes to show the power of e-mail! Don't go making STUPID e-mail requests such as this and they won't show up in the local press, or around the Web.
It'll probably come out that they've had an on/off/on/off relationship (or one or them will wish they did) and it'll go quiet because of the possible sexual harrassment case that could turn up. (hee hee, I said "turn up")
....that is all...
Posted by: kibby F5� | June 18, 2005 at 02:25 AM
Put your hands together for "Flagrant Ted and the Moabites"
Posted by: Marvin | Paranoid Android | June 18, 2005 at 02:46 AM
UO,
Sorry about that blog problem. I started it not long a go, but I didn't think that it had a registration problem. I will look into it.
Thanks for the link. I gave up last night and went up to bed. Now all of the kids (4) are awake; so maybe later.
Posted by: Jessica R. | June 18, 2005 at 04:51 AM
kibby F5™ --
OUT
STAN
DING
!!!
Jess ... NBD ... I was tired, and not very patient, just trineta help and gave up soon and went to bed ...
Posted by: U.O | June 18, 2005 at 01:02 PM
kibby...Wow...That was cool.
*stands...applauds*
Posted by: Cynthia | June 18, 2005 at 05:47 PM
That MOAT is currently being spammed. No one has been there since June 15. Where does everyone hang out these days?
Posted by: Jessica R. | June 18, 2005 at 06:04 PM
Thanks for the explaination. I'm more confused now than before! I feel like a total newbie.
Posted by: alanboss | June 18, 2005 at 07:34 PM
not sayin' - did you mean that my posts are getting lame? If so, I apologize to both you and Kingy Wingy. I didn't mean to upset anyone...
*goes to chair in corner, on crutches since she is lame, and pays penance*
Posted by: Aunt Nancy | June 18, 2005 at 08:20 PM
Aunt Nancy!!!
NO!
I was hinting to him!
Posted by: not sayin' | June 19, 2005 at 12:46 AM
OK - I have two explanations for my "paranoid" post:
1) it was waaaaaay past my bedtime
2) I've been inhaling too much turpenoid fumes
Thanks for setting me straight, not sayin'
*goes to studio - puts away oil paints and gets out acrylics and opens window*
Posted by: Aunt Nancy | June 19, 2005 at 05:17 AM
AN,
excellent.
now that you've got the window open, (fan helps)
paint me a miniature of what you see?
i allas wanted a lil glimpse of heaven.
Posted by: not sayin' | June 19, 2005 at 12:40 PM
AN,
tnx for the pic! (actually i have one of them down the street...tuh, one persons' treasure,huh?)
btw...a pic of the "Whizzinator" peekin' in would be fun.
Posted by: not sayin' | June 22, 2005 at 01:17 PM