OBSERVATION FROM ORLANDO
Nobody should take this personally, but: As a nation, we could stand to lose maybe 117 trillion pounds.
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June 23, 2005
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Dr. Phil is aware of this problem and he is working on it.
Posted by: Mrs. Bickerson | June 23, 2005 at 06:52 AM
Nobody should take this personally, but: As a nation, we could stand to lose maybe 117 trillion pounds.
That's 3.6092 kilometers in metric in case you were wondering.
Posted by: Zaphod | June 23, 2005 at 06:54 AM
I think that the most fun thing about all this is that on vacation, Dave does exactly the same thing he does when he's home. Dave, can I have your life?
And why the hell do you have one of judi's high school pictures with you in Orlando?
Posted by: gfunksizzle | June 23, 2005 at 06:55 AM
I think that the most fun thing about all this is that on vacation, Dave does exactly the same thing he does when he's home. Dave, can I have your life?
And why the hell do you have one of judi's high school pictures with you in Orlando?
Posted by: gfunksizzle | June 23, 2005 at 06:57 AM
I think that the most fun thing about all this is that on vacation, Dave does exactly the same thing he does when he's home. Dave, can I have your life?
And why the hell do you have one of judi's high school pictures with you in Orlando?
Posted by: gfunksizzle | June 23, 2005 at 06:57 AM
OK, I swear to God, I don't know why I'm double or triple commenting. I'm not clicking post more than once, I'm not clicking refresh, none of that. Bah.
Posted by: gfunksizzle | June 23, 2005 at 06:59 AM
gfunk! A hatrick!
Posted by: pogo | June 23, 2005 at 07:00 AM
All the obese people are on vacation in the States, MiB.
Dave, okay, I get the point. I'll start my diet right now. Sheesh. I don't need a brick to fall
OUCH! Who threw that?
Posted by: «LabSpecimen» | June 23, 2005 at 07:21 AM
I noticed that the last time I was at Palt Pisney Porld. You could really tell who the foreigners were: the slim, fit and attractive ones. The Americans are gross.
In the interests of full disclosure, I'll go on record and admit I have a big gut. But I didn't acquire this gut by eating American junk food like everyone at Palt Pisney Porld. I acquired this gut by drinking quality beer, which is a time-honored and respected gut-building method the world over.
Posted by: GDogg | June 23, 2005 at 07:25 AM
That equates to about $212,846,000,000,000. I think the government has already lost that much, hasn't it?
Posted by: Permanent4 | June 23, 2005 at 07:27 AM
Raising hand. Sheepishly.
My capris were a little tight (in the rear) this morning. I consoled myself with the thought that maybe I should have washed them in cold water???
In any event, I'm now wearing blue slacks instead.
Sigh
Posted by: Giddy | June 23, 2005 at 07:30 AM
zaphod, What the heck are you measuring? 3km? More like 50 billion metric tons.
Posted by: Dan | June 23, 2005 at 07:34 AM
I was recently in Orlando myself and I concur with Dave. I would also add that there should be an age and/or weight limit on wearing bikinis and speedos to theme parks.
Posted by: Atticus | June 23, 2005 at 07:39 AM
...can't...control...haiku...
"Trying to lose weight?"
"I'll have double fries with that..."
"You disgusting slob..."
Posted by: snif | June 23, 2005 at 08:13 AM
I'd say Dave is being conservative in his estimate. It is time to sue Krispy Kreme.
Posted by: Name Withheld since I'm Not American | June 23, 2005 at 10:17 AM
zaphod...wondering about metric?...NO.
but what happened to the daily dose of gross that
usually helps me stay on m'diet?
Posted by: Cynthia | June 23, 2005 at 11:34 AM
Hey Dave, did you know if you filled the front of the log at the ride in Orlando with the initials SM with fat people, like me, you coudl create an even bigger splash. Always fun for me to load up with another fat buddy up front and then duck at at the big drop and soak the people in the second row.
Posted by: Jim | June 23, 2005 at 12:17 PM
Jim- does that really work? I would consider gaining weight just to do that. Especially if they were skinny people.
Posted by: silver | June 23, 2005 at 02:07 PM
were you stuck on line behind [!] the lardasses? i think i saw them here in albany at the chinese buffet place last week. cant they go over to people and tell em when they've had enoough?
Posted by: queensbee | June 23, 2005 at 02:41 PM
Dave - I suggest you head on over to Germany at Epcot and have a Bloatwurst and some beer and forget about this weight-loss thing.
Posted by: djtonyb | June 23, 2005 at 02:54 PM
Dr. Phil has made quite and industry from this, but I think it may be time for Dr. Barry's Weight Loss Challenge. Dave?
Posted by: alanboss | June 23, 2005 at 06:21 PM
California should make up the weight. Just split along the san andreas and let her drift. Best of luck!
Posted by: American | June 23, 2005 at 07:16 PM
You know, I respect that this is a humor blog and I can laugh at myself, but I really don't see the point of just plain being mean to people. I'm not talking about Dave's post, I'm talking about a lot of the bloggers here. We're human beings, you know, not animals.
Posted by: fatass | June 24, 2005 at 07:48 AM
I just got back from the happiest place on earth last week, and I have to agree. I am overweight, to the extent that some rides are uncomfortably tight for me, and there were people there who had to outweigh me by 200 - 300 lbs. What is there to do if you are that big? Almost all rides would be impossible. If I don't lose some weight soon, I'm not going back.
Posted by: Angel | June 24, 2005 at 11:33 AM