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June 20, 2005


It has its perks

(Thanks to MOTW)



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Hmmm ... "Institute director Alan Hirsch said he smeared several middle-aged woman with broccoli, banana, spearmint leaves, and lavender."

I think we all know why Alan Hirsch got into this particular line of work.

I *love* the smell of grapefruit!

"smeared several middle aged-women with broccoli, banana..." ahhh college days..good times, good times..

1. This all sounds like a Double Dare Physical Challenge.

2. I'm glad we spend so much money to find out what makes us more like apes.

3. "Hang on, Sweetie, I got citric acid in my eye. Call the Johnson's and tell them we'll be running late."

4. You kno they won't be able to call the perfume Grapefruit Juice, they'll call it Paradise Passion or something. More like Clumsy Old Lady at Breakfast Odor.

5. You mean if I had majored in something other than English I could have a high paying job? Or at least one that lets me smear stuff on women legally? Dang it.

judi, when's your birthday?

Alan found it to be especially true when the women had grapefruit sized breast implants , also ..

lab: i'll be 19 in august ;)


the grapefruit queen

The correct spelling is "poik."

Main Entry: 3perk
Function: noun
: PERQUISITE -- usually used in plural

Main Entry: per敬ui新ite
Pronunciation: 'p&r-kw&-z&t
Function: noun
Etymology: Middle English, property acquired by means other than inheritance, from Medieval Latin perquisitum, from neuter of perquisitus, past participle of perquirere to purchase, acquire, from Latin, to search for thoroughly, from per- thoroughly + quaerere to seek
1 : a privilege, gain, or profit incidental to regular salary or wages; especially : one expected or promised

If rubbing broccoli on a woman doesn't make her seem older, I'm just not sure I'm buying the results.

Also, Hirsch found that the women who let him rub his banana on them were 90% sluttier, no matter how old they smelled.

Can you get a job smearing this stuff on women? Just wonderin' is all . . .

"Honey, just what the hell is going on here?"

"Darling! It's not what it looks like!"

"You mean the pool man is not smearing grapefruit juice all over your stark naked ramparts?"

"Well, maybe it is what it looks like, but I'm doing this for you! Studies have shown this fruit smell will make me look younger."

"Oh. In that case, me next!"

Pool man: What?!?

*whispering* "Just humor him. He still thinks the cable repairman and I were practicing for the nude jiu jitsu championship."

Markhh - Funny...linking to the same article on two seperate sites.

I remembered that ORIGINS has a fragrance with grapefruit. Checked the website and here's the blurb:

Gloomaway™ Uplifting sensory scent

Boost your mood and brighten your day as nature's merry-makers, including Grapefruit, Orange and Spearmint, fill you with a sense of optimism and contentment. This lively, lighthearted scent will inspire you to laugh and let go.

Here's a description of another fragrance at the ORIGINS site:

In times of confusion and concern, let nature's aromatic cheerleaders, including perky Tangerine, Orange and Lemon, rally your spirits and motivate your mood. No need to worry, suddenly things are looking up, up, up.

Who writes this stuff and can I have some of whatever they are on?

A study of smells shows that the scent of grapefruit on women make them seem younger to men — about six years younger.

This would change the average age of women in my county from 68 to 62. Oh yeah...there's going to be wild times on the shuffleboard courts tonight.

I wonder if smearing stuff on their cars would make 'em drive younger?

Funny they didn't smear beer on women and analyze the response. Beer with undertones of beef jerky would seem like the nectar of the gods for men.

They say grapefuit makes the heart grow fonder
through the nose, that is, but I wonder

would the results be the same
if they were to play the game
with other than fruit and vegetables?

I mean, broccoli? Please!
what else, frozen peas?
Surely these are more delectable:

Beer, to be sure at the top of the heap
running close second would be roasted meat

Pizza, coffee, bread, frying bacon
all of these are saliva-makin'

but much more than smell
surely rampart size will tell,
along with round hips and waist thin

if you don't believe me
just consider Leetie-
still wed in spite of her tail wind

For someone to SMELL younger, makes as much sense as someone who SOUNDS good looking.

However, I would like to know how to volunteer for this kind of study. As long as the technicians look like my UPS driver, I'm all for gettin' nekkid for the sake of science!

is that white or pink grapefruit?

renee - reminds me of Martin Mull's remark:"Writing about music is like dancing about architecture."

Did they say what the men's responses were when the women were rubbed with anchovy paste?


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