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April 30, 2005


Without knowing anything specific about this situation, this blog would just like to say that if we were facing a giant wedding with 600 guests, 14 bridesmaids and 14 groomspersons, we would run away, too.


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Sondra - I use it for stress-reducing therapy - as in, Oh, look at all the pretty colors...

Six hundred guests? Are they some kind of alien hive mind?

Hi Sondra,U.O and El....Loved the link El..Sooo.. no new (or knew)posts on sunday?

Hi, Cyn,

Maybe Dave's spending time with his family. That's the purported reason for our deprivation.

El -- I remember His Daveness blogging that last year. And everyone agreed that it was the result of an acid trip.

Of course, I was distracted without drugs look something shiny thanks to plastic bag AD headache HD


I've got your sidekick name: Alex, the Sidekick.

I can hear it now, "Never fear, Alex, the Sidekick is here!"

D'oh....Have y'all noticed the barter system is tryn' make a comeback?...some guy was busted a few days back for trying to trade a couple steaks to a "working girl" for sex! (she was undercover and not hungry) In todays news a pizza delivery guy was beaten up because he refused to accept pot in payment for a pizza! BTW..since i couldn't find a way to send either of these to Judi, would the kind person who gave us the formula for adding a link PLEASE repeat the instructions-I've searched thru the posts to no avail.

Cyn, I think you'll find that info (not [not knot,naught or gnawed] infeaux [typing French sure is hard on the tongue]) in the Mysterious Ways thread or somewhere in that area. Then, again, it may be in the Luxury Lifestyle Link Alex gave the boot to in, I think, the last thread.*snork*

*zips..mmm...zips...mmm...walks off to check threads for Cyn's post*

She's (i) nuts, (ii) selfish, or (iii) a combination of both. I'm guessing it's door number three.

She's (i) nuts, (ii) selfish, or (iii) a combination of both. I'm guessing it's door number three.

She's (i) nuts, (ii) selfish, or (iii) a combination of both. I'm guessing it's door number three.

Jeezly E2, are ALL those carpet crawlers Yours!?!

Jeezly E2, are ALL those carpet crawlers Yours!?!

*zips...mmm...zips...Okay, walks back from thread check*

Cyn, Alex posted info at 4:09 (Get around, get around 4:09) in the Jason Shouts the Blues About Netiquette 'Cause He Left His Piano in His Other Pants thread that details how to link an image. I know someone else (D'Art, maybe?) posted similar instructions in a slightly earlier thread.
Check'em out, or just ask Alex who's (not whose, hues, hews or Hughes) trying to come up with a suitable sidekick name.

*exits stage left*

`scuse me...e3. (I think I see our problem!)..(heh)..I got two or three of the lil' boogers muhself.

Fancy Link Thingy™:

<a href="http://siteurl">text</a>

Alex - when I went back to look for that "test" (soon after your comment) it was gone, or I lost it, whichever ... then I went shopping ... HOWever, when I returned, I had another one of the mysterious "returned mail" and this one had a "user unknown" so I clicked on it and it mad funnep'l;av kj.lcn alnaf fna adb klja;oinvl ...

Just kidding ... I dumped that one too, but they try to be tricky ...

El -- Sorry, it's cute (your link) but the day isn't that slow for me ... I've still got laundry to do ...

Geezer Police -- It was worth the 10 yard penalty to get to use the "drooping banner" line ...

and ...

It was definitely worth the extra 10 yards to be able to snuggle the curvaceous ones ...

*crawls in from stage right and is rosflhao over Alex and U.O posts*

Alex, I don't recommend "Alex, the Stupendous Sidekick" for reasons that would be obvious if you recall the bloggers here have a penchant for addressing you by your initials. Otherwise, it looks stupendous! And tnx for the cool info.

And U.O, the Stupendous Man motto is: "A woman never stood so tall as when she stooped to do my laundry."


what the hell are you people talking about???

Alex!...TNX!...will mess w/it (way) later. SIA for clumbsy posts y'all.........*wanders off to Mysore for a nap*

S.M. -- speaking of initials ... (Yeah, I noticed that Alex t. S. S. before ... but thot I'd see how long it took ... not long, as it turned out ...) ...

Besides which, the problem with the stupid laundry is that there aren't any women (or girls, or daughters, or guys or anyone) stoopid enough to be found stooped over my laundry bag ... which leaves ... only moi ownself to do it ... n'cest pas¿

Alex -- how about ...

Stupendous Alex, Sidekick ...???

At least that one's acronym isn't quite as dangerous ...

howard --

we're talking about either running away from getting married or running away to get married or the vast extent of our various genius-laden mind power ...

hang in there ... you'll catch on after a while ...

but don't try to follow us ... we're lost ...

*Stupendous Man zips (just got his zipper out of the shop) in*

U, there are none (not [not knot, naught or gnawed] nun) here either. Maybe because that's the Stupendous Man Motto?

Back later. My girlfriend's here and just cut her arm on the glass topped coffee table. With the handy little patch up kit, I should have her reinflated in no time. For a moment there it looked just like she was stooping to do my laundry.



This is the magic formula I use to create a link:

blue words

I usually cut and paste the link's address from the address bar.

...*sigh*....Y'know..it occurs to me that even with the FLT,I still don't know how to USE it...please forgive my Puterdumbitis..does anybody have the-lack-of-anything-better-to-do- but-to-`splain-it-to-me-step by step?...pretty please?


That didn't come out right. A piece at a time:

then the words that will appear in blue and be clicked on, then

The only space is in the first line.


Damn. One More Time!

This thing:
then the words you want to appear in blue
then this:

Okay. There. Did I do it right this time?


The thing that didn't appear in lines 1 and 9 is the opposite of this: >

it points left and means 'less than'

ah, my genius-laden mind power! What would I do without it?

nope ... the second half of that didn't come out right ...

try to follow it with only the stuff above "a complete one should look like this" ... ignore the rest, 'cuz it's incomplete ...

I'll check back here (this thread) tomorrow. I'm outta here.

WELL!..a BIG TNX TO ALL!.... but see, the problem here (and hear) is that I don' get the F key functions or the Ctrl key functions..and f'instance WTF is cut and paste? HowEVER...I have a computer literate friend (fixes COMM & NAV systems on THE ships) who, with much grumbling, will read this and SHOW me.... still needed your posts for him to see WTH I'm tryna do...SO...love ALL Y'all...I'll play w/this awhile (only 9:18pm here) see ya manana prolly. (I'm on a newer laptop w ALL the bells&whistles..so it's just ME..[but I learn quick]...usually)

IGIT - (and all you others on the same page)

I very seldom use F keys or Crtl or Option keys ... when I need 'em, yes, but not for any of that link stuff we've talked about here, except the shortcut on PASTE ... and that can also be done with your cursor/mouse and a click ...

Somebody said "cut and paste" but I prefer to think of it as "copy and paste" 'cuz I don't "cut" very much until I'm all done ... don't lose stuff so much that way ...

To COPY: Click your cursor on a spot where you want to start copying, then hold your mouse key or scratch pad clicker DOWN and drag the cursor to the OTHER END of what you want to copy, then RELEASE the mouse key/pad clicker --- this will highlight what you want to copy ... then you go to click on your menu bar or tool bar, (mine is on "Edit") and you should get a drop-down menu and you can then drag down and click OR release on "copy" --- there should also be a key combination shown there, to show the shortcut method of doing the same thing you just did with a mouse, only faster and easier ... maybe ...
(mine is Butterfly C to copy ... Butterfly V to paste ... Butterfly X to cut ... and PCs don't have the Butterfly/Cloverleaf key, that's where you'll get into the crtl or option keys, if your on a PC ... IF YOU WANT TO DO THE SHORTCUTS ... but you can do the same things with your mouse, click, drag, and so on ...)

Okay, that action should have copied your text/whatever ...

Next, you go to where you want to "PASTE" what you've copied.
Click your cursor where you want to paste, and then release (leave the cursor where it is) and go back to the menu/tool bar item (as above, mine is on "Edit") and take the mouse/cursor down to "Paste"
(or the shortcut illustrated -- mine is "Butterfly V" -- it's a Mac, and that's what I've always called that little cloverleaf key to the left of the space bar)
and click on it, and BINGO!

Your copied stuff should now be pasted in its new place.

Slicker 'n' snot on a doorknob ... trust me ...

The reason I do "copy and ..." is that if I messed up somehow, the material is still there, and I can go back to it ... if I did "cut and ..." once I leave, it's gone ... forever ... unless I use another trick that's not important now ...

So, that's "copy" and "paste" ... a VERY handy tool, esp. for moving stuff around ... whole pages, 'net addresses, sentences, mailing addresses, email addresses ...

I keep a page or two in my word processing software files --Appleworks 6 is what I've got handiest -- and if I need my "crib notes" I can just open that item, and open the file, and copy and paste my crib notes to the message/page I'm working on, and it's right there, and I don't hafta go back and forth, or use a scratch paper for notes, and such ...

Keep in mind, much of this is self-taught, and it works for me, 'cuz I've been doing it this way (more or less) for 15-20 years ... other folks prolly have fancier or smoother systems or procedures ... (It worked for me when I was in the newspaper bidness ... and when you're on deadline, you want something that works fairly quickly ... my "system" has served me well enuf ... good luck ...)


Yup, that worked for me ...

BUT IT WAS NOT NECESSARILY A BAD THING TO HAVE GO WORNG ... 'cuz I was able to see the thingys you left out, and correct them ... and hope that my explanation is clear enuf for you to see what I meant ...

BTW, people frown on stretching the blog with those long strings of stuff, but this one happened due to the length of the link address ... many have done it, but try to avoid it if you can ...

Also BTW, MOST of us who have had to learn how have had similar frustrations [@#$%^&*())(*&^%$] in trying to make it work ... it took me about seven tries AFTER the instructor left the classroom ...

...um, I did hit shift-comma, and got the

Hey, relax ... deep breathely ...

You'll get it ...

If an old dog like me can figure it out (after 19 tries), anyone can ... you'll get it ... (I'm still pretty slow, but I can use my cheat sheet and it gets easier ...)

1. copy the address
2. paste address on the blog
3. beg pitifully

some1 will link to it for u

what?...it works for me...

DIATH...got the lft arrow and followed the 12 steps exactly. Jeez, the above post wiped out everything after the.... shift-comma(HA)...ISC...(I was just sayin' solly for not gittn't it and expl. "friend" went hissy & "do not WANT to know how to hyper-link" after tryn' help.)..THEN OMG..realized I'd messed up whole blog - not just MY page!!!...OOOOOh Lucy!....maybe just don't NEED h-link.....It's wierd...I mostly get the formula..no prob laying out address...it's he CtrlC/CtrlV where I messed up.....the functions...simple stuff...I have no idea how I stretched the page and the drag and click grumpy friend tried..at bars..did NOT work...Gaaah...

Also...can't even use enter key to seperate sentences...yet no prb dwn/ldg updates, adding the "players" etc....I get stuck on the basics..and the tech stuff marginaly escapes me....largely escapes me...I really do love you guys....think I'll back off the fancy stuff til I can KNOW I won't fry something...*sigh* Nite.

*Stupendous Man checks in after reinflating his girlfriend*

This thread has gone to he** in a "hamster wheel" while I was gone,but at least you've (not [not knot, naught or gnawed] uvula) been spending your (not [not knot, naught or gnawed] you're or ewer) thyme weaselly (it's easier to just go ahead and make the mistakes and trust ewer judgment) studlying the workings of the internal combustion Indian or, maybe, computer functions instead of trying to figure what Howard (05/01/05 9:13) REALLY wants to know.


OK....studied enuf.....pretty much get it....but-I followed it(had written it down)..posted...and everthing went to **** in a handbasket...Oh Well.......................Bangi..Mom always said I was a "Late Bloomer".:)

All right folks, move along, nothing to see here, nothing happening ... move along ... everything's fine

(Don't wanna say too much, but my screen is wide enuf, I can see everything without running it back and forth with the side-to-side scroller ...)

That's weird.

I posted ...

It was there ...

And now it's not (not itch snot) ...


and that other one too ... and then I hadda restart ... and now everthing is here ...


el-cheap-o ISP crapola???


whatever ...

Quit stretching the blog !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I hate that!

Where's my coffee?

Hey Dave -- This topic is wearing thin...too many people veering off of it and blah-blahing about other subjects. Need a new headline.

Cyn, you are now hated blog-wide for stretching the 160-post thread.


Angrily yours,

The margins are stretched! Yikes. I think I'll run away.

Hey, Cyn, it happens. And most of us only get angry when it's done on purpose, not due to an innocent error.

The margins are stretched! Yikes. I think I'll run away.

Hey, Cyn, it happens. And most of us only get angry when it's done on purpose, not due to an innocent error.

Did someone way back there refer to an "unwilling sperm recipient?" That's from George Carlin. He has a rant where he goes on about how euphemistic our language has become, and at the very end of it, he says how it's gotten so bad that he wouldn't be surprise to hear that a rape victim would soon be called an unwilling sperm recipient. So um. yeah.

Lord!!..I guess nobody's even interested in teachin' me to drive a tank...

Anger!...HATRED!?!...Geez..have ya tried Prozac?

she changed her mind. her parents, fiance, maid of honor probably all told her its just normal jitters. the only way for her to get out of it was to split.

Hey, Mike MDW, re your 12:09 post: It was a guy and he was an "unwitting" sperm donor (whatever that means).


LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!..Listen..Just to be clear, I did not Mean to screw the blog (SWTB) SO..in def'rnce to insecure lil' thangs, I proudly reclaim my name....ALSO, to the few snotty, whiney, tattle to dave'rs out there....Kiss My Grits!!!!.Please play NICE children!!!....:)

The Ballad of the RunAway Bride

She left for Vegas without making fuss
She cut off her hair and then ran for the bus
She left behind the ring and the love of her life..
She had no intention of being his wife.
600 guest and a lifetime of hell
She had no desire to hear wedding bells
In the bright lights of Vegas her sorrows she drowned
With a smile and bug eyes she started painting the town
4 days and 3 nights was not near enough fun
So she headed for Alberquerke and a life on the run.
They carried her story on the late news at ten
then she started worry when she watched CNN..
She ran out of reasons and money to fly
She dialed 911 and started to lie..
Now this is the story of the Run Away Bride
The Police brought her home and want to know why?
I saw her boyfriend and all I can say..
at least now I know why the girl ran away
All rights Reserved
2005 (c)Stan Bernard

Lizzy....tnx! good info...at least for other (and future) bloggers....me.....no more fancy thingys for aWHILE.:)

Cynthia, don't give up on fancy things, if you want to try again doing links without risking to stretch the margins, it's very simple, you just click on the "Preview" button before posting, and you'll see if your link did work or not.

OMG...how easy is THAT!?! Thanks Marie!!!!!

I know it's way LTTG (hey, I was away, OK?) but I thought I should mention this: Osama a runaway bridegroom.

Who knew?

this is only a test ... feel free to ignore it ...

I'll send my r&eacutesumé ma&ntildeana &omega

I'll send my résum&233 mañana, Ca&241 ...

re-test ... ignore again, if you want ...

I'll send my résumé, mañana ... Cañ City, Colorado ... this is the &omega ...

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