AND STILL THE SO-CALLED "DEPARTMENT OF HOMELAND SECURITY" DOES NOTHING

(Thanks to Claire Martin)

Comments

[MOTW]

Snails lurk?

[Christobol]

Ladies and gentleman, give it up for Lurking Snails and the Fish Pathologist.

Hey, I just noticed that "Claire Martin" anagrams to "Mlaire Cartin".

[MM]

And who is going to apply a lethal dose of Formula 409? Jack Bauer, naturally.

[Eleanor]

Let's hear it for Formula 409 - I'm certain it's an eco-friendly product !!!
*snork*

[MOTW]

Lurking Snails would be a good name for a undercover surveillance unit.

Good morning, y'all. Nice of you to join the thread.

[MOTW]

Lurking Snails would be a good name for a undercover surveillance unit.

Good morning, y'all. Nice of you to join the thread.

[D'Artagnan]

Can we just rinse them down with a fire hose?

OK, what about if we fill the fire truck with Formula 409.

Sticky bastards.

[long tall texan]

claire martin?

who is this masked female?

and why doesn't she ever post here?

[Di]

Formula 409? Thats their miracle cure?

We can send men to the moon, but we can't stop a few snails from taking over the world? Instead, we release their grip by applying a few sprays of 409?

le'sigh

I guess those people were right from yesterdays thread, life as we know it will soon be over. The world will be taken over by imported snails from New Zealand.

*lays out black cloth and white gym shoes at the side of her bed*

[The Honorable Stinky Butt Guy]

Last!

[Christobol]

Here's how Claire does it.

She's cheating.

[Federal Duck]

*after the New Zealand mudsnail invasion*

Police: Ok, sir. Can you describe the assailants?

Turtle: *crying* I don't know! It all happened so fast!!

*groan*

[Chris]

Wanna know what the French think when THEY see lurking snails?

"Ooh la la, Escargot!"

No offense to anyone on that one.

[froggy]

s'okay, Chris, none taken.

[French Dude]

So, what exactly are you trying to say, Christopher?

[froggy]

s'okay, Chris, none taken.

[Targetgirl]

Too bad the buggers are so tiny. Escargot makes for some tasty little morsels, just not THAT little. Drat.

[Nandini]

Fish Pathologist.

Why didn't they tell me about *that* job on Career Day?

[Nandini]

Fish Pathologist.

Why didn't they tell me about *that* job on Career Day?

[philintexas]

he carried the snail in a Skippy peanut butter jar? Brave fool!

[jamie the star wars nerdgirl]

mmmm...crunchy peanut butter.

[Aunt Nancy]

I googled "New Zealand mudsnail predator" and found this quote (from some Wisconsin paper) "Usually the only hope for controlling an imported pest is introduction of a predator from its native habitat. But first you have to make sure the predator doesn't become another pest. Years ago they brought the mongoose to Hawaii to prey on rats. It did, but then the mongoose became a nuisance." Simple solution - find the predator, import only one gender of the predator so they can't reproduce, tag them all then let them loose. Use the tags to gather them all up again once they've cleaned up the snails. Your tax dollars at work!?!

BTW - Mongoose and the Mudsnails WBAGNFARB?

[Nephew Fred]

Aunt Nancy, did anyone ever tell you that you're a genius? Does the mongoose like to eat mudsnails?

[lobstersaver]

Is anyone else concerned about the fact that they can not only withstand fluctuations in water temperature, but also dissection? And, if they are only 1/4 inch long, how big are the 20-120 live offspring?

[Aunt Nancy]

Nephew Fred - thank you for the compliment, you are TOO kind!! And I don't think mongooses (mongeese?) eat snails. They eat Hawaiian rats and, if you've ever watched "Riki Tiki Tavi" they also eat snakes.

I'm glad I'm not a mongoose.

[Steve]

I'm guessing the Claire character reads the blog through an RSS aggregator, like bloglines or something.

(**Steve ducks to avoid the large objects inevitably hurled in his direction.**)

[Anthony's Apple]

Maybe the ivory billed woodpecker found in Arkansas that was supposedly extinct could eat these buggers?

anthonysapple.blogspot.com

[wilbotsgirl]

Whatever happened to plain old table salt ???

[julietine]

I still insist there's something going on between Claire Martin and Dave....I need to keep investigating...

[Ross]

You send us your rap music, we'll send you our snails. Hahahahahahaha. Ross (New Zealand)

[U.O]

I'm sorry for getting in a rant mode here, but I fail to see the journalistic need for stating the brand of product contained in the jar before it was used to transport snails.

In other words: WTF does Skippy peanut butter have to do with the story? The "writer" could have simply said ... One angler hand-delivered the snails to the Colorado Division of Wildlife in a jar.
Unless, of course, the "writer" gets a payola kickback from any brand products he/she/it happens to mention unnecessarily ...
The Formula 409 is essential to the story ... sort of ...

Aunt Nancy ... I was gonna make a smart-a$$ed remark about how you could tell the sex of these itty-bitty snails ... but then I realized that wasn't what you meant ... depending on the predator selected tho, it could still be a problem ...

... possible solution? Remember the ant ... (really old) joke ... (And NO, I'm not picking on you be referring to ants ... the joke would be in my mind even if you were Brother Larry ...)

How do you tell the sex of an ant?

A guy ant has a teeny weeny. A gal ant has a tiny heiny.