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February 23, 2005


Hard to believe this was never used.

(Thanks to Claire Martin)


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Hi, Dave!


that would definitely go with their country chic look

You gotta love it.

This guy sells mostly pocketbooks.

And this.

Key quote: "You don't see these every day." Not that there's a good reason for that or anything.

Other Key quote "There is brown felt on the bottom"

Right... like we're supposed to believe that!

C'mon people - it's a TOILET SEAT owned by a guy! That's not felt, it's POO MOLD!

"We have for auction 1 rattlesnake toilet seat. There is a story here.... " Ya Think?

but dear I was going to put the seat down until it hissed at me

Ladies, is your aging husband spending too much time on the toilet? This would be the perfect gift, as it would scare the sh!t right out of him.

The real redneck guy would never put that lid up 'cuz it'd hide the nat'ral beauty of the snakeskin.

I'm amazed that so far there has been no mention of the close proximitiy to trouser snakes.

Lab, that was excellent.

One-eye Trouser snake meets Big Dick the stuffed rattler?

Warning: Not recommended for potty training.

"Hey! A rattlesnake! I think I'll pull down my pants and put my butt on it!" is not a message to give to a 2 year old.

Key Quote:

"My mom saw this thing and FREAKED OUT! She said she would rather wear diapers or build an outhouse than put that thing in her bathroom!!"

This could lead to some Redneck fables.."There I was,just a settin' on some gravel,when all of the sudden I saw that I was a settin' on a big 'ol rattler! I decided that if I pushed a whole bunch with some luck I'd a get away clean..So I did,but then out popped a fearsome brown snake! So I squeezed it as a hard as I could with all my might,and I done pinched it clean in half! And by this time the rattler was a done hissin' so I wiped the mud off my cheeks and a washed my hands of the whole the messy incident.."

Brainy Jello, as a mom of a 2 yr old toilet trainee - you are so right. I cracked up at your comments.

My poor son would be ruined forever. He still hasn't eaten a hot dog since I made those damn Octopus shaped hot dogs!

I think it looks AWESOME, and I want it. So there.

I can replace the "raccoon and flying squirrel" toilet seat I made with superglue earlier this year.

By the way, if you are thinking of making one, seduced by the thought of comfortable animal fur on your butt as you relieve yourself, as I was, learn from my experience: It's best to kill the animals.

I found it interesting that DAVE would post this - he has a well known aversion to tricky toilet seats: he wrote once about the sea shell ones and what would make the coral and sea creatures not come back to life, with normal wear and tear, being that they're so close to water and all. Now I wonders if it's a fascination ...

"Rattlesnake Snake Toilet Seat Taxidermy Never Used Gift"

If I didn't know better, I'd think this was a spam email subject, not an actual item.

Dave, a little advice: when shopping for a wedding gift for someone, try to think of something they won't already have.

Hmmm, does it come with accessories? Like, oh, say, snakeskin bathmats? Maybe snakeskin toilet roll covers?

C-bol, my experience with animals is a little different. I once told Federal Duck I prefer to sleep on soft feather pillows.

Perhaps this is why we never see him around anymore.

"If your commode features a seat with a rattlesnake design....you MIGHT be a redneck"

(Do we DO redneck humor here on DB's blog? I'm fairly new and don't want to breach any undertakings, er, I mean, breach any blog etiquette.)

(P.S. I can make redneck jokes, because I'm married to one. I'm not an anti-redneck bigot.)

wha'happened?, there ain' much we don' do 'round here in dis here Dee Bee blog.

Fire away.


as fas as I know anything goes in this blog...

*in shower with boyfriend*

Punky: Hey ... niiice snake.

Imaginary Hot Boyfriend: Thanks, babe.

Punky: It looks really hard. Is it?

IHB: You bet! Hop on!

Punky: 'k!

*gets out of shower*

IHB: Hey! Where are you going?! You can pee in the shower!

Punky: Check please!

wha'happened - welcome to the blog. And if you remember that English is not julietine's native language, you can have a lot more fun ...

I've noticed that Claire Martin's stuff gets blogged a lot, but I've never seen a post from her (him?). Is Claire really one of the the regulars traveling incognito??
Is it C-bol, Julietine, MOTW, Fed Duck, Tamara, or one of the other frequent posters? Inquiring minds want to know!

Just Curious,

She blogs very rarely...but it is not me!...

Thanks, MOTW, I'll keep that in mind!

Punky, thanks (I think) for sharing about your IHB. Maybe you could contact the Blue Fairy, and if IHB is really good, he could one day become a RHB (real hot boyfriend). If I remember correctly, that process begins with wishing upon a star.

Just a thought...

BTW, the name's pronounced MOT-wah, no relation to Claire Martin. And if MOTW ever gets a first post, she is gracious enough not to brag about it.

MOTW, why be FIRST if you're not going to rub it in everyone's fa... er, brag about it?

D'art - ever since the FIRST post by Dave Barry making fun of the FIRSTers, it's been the "uncool" thing to do....

Besides, I remember my first FIRST post, it was way back in the early days of the blog...mwah mwah mwah (Charlie Brown's teacher voice)

Gotta agree with the seat owner's mom. There's probably a place for rattlers, but not in close proximity to where the family jewels dangle.

wilbotsgirl, you are on to something. The combination of toilet and snake always get's his Daveness' attention.

Telemarketer: Hello? Mister Berry?

DB: Grrr. Damn telemarketer! Sophie, bring me the airhorn!

Telemarketer: Wait! Lemme tell you about an amazing toilet with an actual snake embedded in the seat . . .

DB: Really? Here's my credit card number, social security number and the unlisted phone numbers of five of my closest friends!

I have a friend who used to make rattlesnake hatbands ...

So, I guess it would all depend upon which head you wanted the snake to be closer to ... in the head, as it were ...

'happened - Not only can we do redneck humor here, I AM one.

"Redneck - A blissful lack of sophistication" - Foxworthy.

We are a threatened species. When I was a lad almost everybody was a redneck. Now there are far fewer of us and even less who admit to it.

Oh Wow! I can't believe Uncle Bob is selling his gift.... I mean... um.. what kind of a whack job would buy something like that for someone?

Di, I bet you could get one of these deals at Nonmacher's BBQ; they gotta do SOMETHING with those hides.

BTW, shirts and shoes reqired, but bras optional? Good policy.

Horned Frog! You went and didn't tell me!?

How is Bill, I mean Mr. Nonmacher? He had some heart issues last time I was out there... wasn't doing to well, but his help was always very nice and served up some pretty good grub.

Did you like it? You can email me if you'd like so we don't bog down the blog with BBQ nonsense..

For Chucky's and Cammy's abode
A serpentine-studded commode
The seat is designed
For those who will find
A place for a big royal 'load'.

Insomniac - Congrats Babe! You just made me snort laugh! First time today!

Polly, you must live in the midwest... :)
Not that I'm speaking from experience.

*waves nervously at Polly, never having met such a well known Bloglit before*

Yep, went by a couple weeks ago for late lunch, nobody there at that time but staff, who I assume are all exchange students.

Chris: I went to use the toilet but when I tried I couldn't..
Pat: Why not?
Chris: There was a snake in my seat!
Pat: Ouch..

Horned - LOL. Yes, I do believe that is what he refers to them as also. Exchange students.
Did you like the food, or did I rave too highly?

Raving High wbagnfarb


and with that, i conclude today's drive-by blugging ( blog+hugging). and remember, a snake in the hand is worth two on the toilet seat.

Only one comment on the felt? I have cleaned a few undersides of toilet seats in my life, and I gotta tell y'all... they don't stay clean. Felt is probably a bad idea for that.

Note to jilly willy: There is a site called pottystickers.com
If you are toilet training a wee one, check it out!!!

wha'happened?: Around here Blog Etiquette is an oxymoron, as well as agnfarb.

Higgy, so is Poo Mold.

I've been blugged!

And I LIKED it!

*wink to Bangi and Di*

Psst! Polly was blugged by Bangi and Di! Pass it on.

Polly ... I never knew you were so open-minded. *wink*


Who knows? Maybe someday soon I'll even experiment with a little backdoor blugging...

*covers her backdoor to prevent any possible blugging while shes not looking*

*blugs Bangi, Punky and Polly at the same time*

Polly ...

I highly recommend it. ;)

Di is a multiple blugger!

Higgy..... poo mold!

I would prarie dog all day and then go poo outside and wipe with a pine cone before I would ever sit on this toilet seat!!!!

I am finding it hard to believe that there are two bids on this item!

Two bids!!!??? Who else is bidding on this thing? Dang, I didn't want to pay THAT much!

Seems this blog went off topic for a while, the listing is now pulled so I couldn't get a glimpse; however, all of your comments made it easy enough to understand what
was going on here.

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