GOOD NAME FOR A ROCK BAND

The Bent Policemen

(Thanks to Sondra Anderson)

Comments

[Eleanor]

kibby, cye...........:)

[trillian]

did peri delete her blog?

[Jeff Meyerson]

Listening to the WCRE commercials made me note:

Urinary Incontinence is NOT AGNFARB.

Excuse me, I need to sing along with Elvis.

[Jeff Meyerson]

Thanks, Susan.

[kibby F5™]

trillian, I see it's only password protected now?

PIVO:30!

[trillian]

thats what i thought, so i signed up for a word press account, but when i try to go to peri's blog it sends me to some admin page

[Mad Scientist Weasel]

A little less conversation came on the radio (well ipod) last night and I immediately thought of El. My cat was lying on top of my belly/chest (he is a big cat) and I made him do the Elvis shake. Weasel and I were dying laughing.

Kibby-glad you had a great time with the wee one.

Blogchik - hang in there the right one will come along

Jeff - I saw $3.01 this morning. How can CA be less than NY?

[Jeff Meyerson]

Mad, I know our gas taxes are the highest but I can't believe we're worse than California.

How's your weather? It's gotten very hot & humid here.

[jamester]

Jeff - Hot/dry. Repeat ad nauseum. Slight chance of afternoon thunderstorms in the mountains. Which means more work for the firefighters...
And jackie is right - Independence Day is a great movie...

[Kaffy In Disguise (With Glasses)]

Hmm.. I looked at Peri's blog last night and it was fine (although she hasn't posted in a couple or three weeks). This morning (my time), gone! I wonder if she's okay? Might flick her an email to make sure.

Weather report? 38F, grey and overcast. Blah.

[Jeff Meyerson]

She had a post about pornography. The next day it was gone and the top post was again the bag purchases. Now this.

Hot and increasingly humid here - 92 today, hotter and stickier tomorrow. We're hoping for a break on Wednesday or at least by Thursday morning.

/end weather

[Susan]

Oh my goodness. I've found the man of my dreams. Just got an IM from him...picture is very very good looking.
.
.
.
.
.
Just because he buzzed me before he actually said anything, and had a sentence that was, I quote, "My mom now live in my dad's house in spanish" and also, hmmm, where's a good one...ah yes, with exact punctuation, "I saw ur profile and i like what i see there, You are very pretty looking woman which i will like to know more better"

Surely (I know, don't call me Shirley) this is True Love!!!

I mean, he apologized for buzzing me before he said hello...

Called me baby when he apologized too.

I bet I could have him calling me darling in a few minutes.
.
.
.
*falls on floor laughing*

Honestly, I'm sure Mitch and Whitt can find me someone better.

At least it was a diversion of a few minutes, and a pretty picture to look at...even though I KNOW it's not a picture of the person who sent the message. It's still amusing.

Now to record news!

Poor thing, I'm sure he'll be crushed.

[Susan]

His profile says he's from Dallas, Texas...

But he just said he happens to be in...

Wait for it...

"west african to buy some goods down there".

No!!!!!!

Imagine that!

Oh I'm soooooooo glad there's no one in the building right now to hear me laughing....they would seriously think there was something wrong with me.

[Susan]

Oh....he doesn't know if I'm going to be ok with him.

Bwahahahahaha..........

I needed a good laugh today...

[insomniac]

hold out, susan! i'm sure he's got millions!

the messages you got read like almost everyone who leaves a comment on youtube...

[Eleanor]

WTG, Susan!!!

[djtonyb]

*runs through screaming, followed by a very large birthday cake with 40 candles on it*

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!

*runs the other way*

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

*dives into the MOAT*

This isn't supposed to happen. I refuse to act like an adult.

[slyeyes]

Happy birthday, DJT!!!!!!!

((((Kibby and F2.3.4.5))))) -- how sweet *not commenting on the sitting-on-the-toilet-with-pants-around-ankles portion*

OK, on the "over protective parents front", how's this.

Meghan. In the Adirondacks. Calls her sister and me last weekend. At the end of the call, said she's going with others to look for Gloria.

Gloria?

Gloria the black bear who has been frequenting the fringes of their camp.
*
*
*
*
*
*
*

OK this is NOT neighbo(u)r hood cat or a stray cat. THIS IS A FREAKING STRAY BLACK BEAR!!!!!!!!!!

Jenni and Tim had an encounter with a black bear in the Sequoia's a couple of years ago. Jenni was yelling into the phone to Meghan to stay the hell away from Gloria. I just sat back and calmly (ha! as if!) said, "What Jenni said."

Then Meghan told us about a squirrel getting into their apartment and how she stood on the sofa screaming until it left.

I'll just sit here and drink my Metro Bellini while you all to soak up the irony of that.

**************************************************

OK, I'm at the patio bar of the Hyatt enjoying the aforementioned Metro Bellini (which, yum!)

I've been patting myself on the back after having a bit of an Erin Brokovich kind of day. But without having my boobs hanging out.

I know, boring.

But, really, kind of exciting. I can't publically go into much more, but ----

wow.

Oh, excuse me. Someone just brought me my laurels. I think I'll go rest on them.
*
*
*
*
*

OUCH!!!

Are laurels supposed to be thorny?

[djtonyb]

*pours another mimosa because he doesn't have fresh peaches for a bellini*

These big bottles of champagne really last quite a while!

*hands sly a fluffy beach towel to protect from laurel-resting induced punctures*

Let them chase the stray bear, you know how to have a much better time...

[TCK]

OK, i saw "boobs hangin out" and i read "publicly" as "pubicly"

[djtonyb]

*orders whatever Tiberius is drinking*

[TCK]

tiberius *snork* is drinkin bud, outa longneck bottles

[djtonyb]

*snorks* at a memory of a Jeff Foxworthy quote, which goes along the lines of:

A woman has lots of complex thoughts, but a man basically has one: "I'd like a beer, and I'd like to see something nekked"

[laurel]

hey, sly! stop resting on me and find your own bed already!

[TCK]

jeff is a very wise man *snork*

[Kaffy In Disguise (With Glasses)]

Wheeeeee!! All the boys have come out to play!!

Hi & happy impending 5th decade to DJT!!

Also, a very happy birthday to the lurkerish Eadn!!

Sly.. Your daughter has a weird sense of perspective. I know squirrels are evil, but... umm... how to say this? The freaking BEAR is far more likely to view you as a threat.. or a large snack.

[TCK]

5th decade?!?

holy crap

um....

i mean...

geez, tony looks pretty damn good :)

[TCK]

5th decade?!?

holy crap

um....

i mean...

geez, tony looks pretty damn good :)

[TCK]

i did not say that twice!!

[Leetie]

Happy 40th to my most favoritest DJ of all time.

*smoochies*

[insomniac]

happy birthday, djtony!

[Jeff Meyerson]

I posted here hours ago. They said they were "waiting" for something or other and it would be posted.

WTFBBQ???

[Jeff Meyerson]

Crap. It's weird because I haven't done it lately but I happened to save the post so here it is, ca. 6:45 am.

Wow, where did all you guys pop up from last night?

Happy birthday, djtony!

40 is the new 38... or something like that.

Susan, are we sure Whitt didn't send that himself?

In West African?

Okey dokey.

Hot here today, a little hotter than yesterday, and even more humid. Ick. It is already 80 at 6 am! WTFBBQ?! I mean, what do they think we are, Miami?

The good news is, the front is supposed to come through tomorrow afternoon and cool things down somewhat.

/end weather

Who has the morning traffic?

Oh yeah, Jackie is working again today. They are ordering books and stuff for summer school...which started last week!

For sly {{{ }}}: G-L-O-R-I-A.

Gonna shout it every day...

Maybe Susan can play it for Meghan today?

[Eleanor]

*zips in*

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, TONY!

I miss seeing you around here!

*smooch*

And one more to grow on: *smooch*

[Jeff Meyerson]

Tech Report Alert!

[Jeff Meyerson]

No Atticus?

[Jeff Meyerson]

That's funny, as I was just thinking about this Loggins & Messina song a couple of days ago.

[jamester]

Tony - it's not the years, it's the mileage...
Happy Birthday!

[Susan]

DJT!!! *hug* Now you're 40 like me! It isn't that bad! (Other than random female type things of a sort that you won't have to deal with...TMI I know) Happy birthday!!!

And a happy birthday to eadn as well! (You are missed!)

Golly gee, no messages today from my true love in south african.

Oh wait...I reported him as spam last night so he can't send me anything.

I have, possibly, survived my two mornings going across the river to sign the station on over there.

This, after yesterday afternoon, getting a frantic call...they're off the air! What could it be???? Mitch, who lives over there, fixed it. Then I went over this morning, and Could. Not. Record. Not without many many mistakes anyway...and then got panicked because I had to get back to Cheraw to get my daughter up and to summer school...and the more panicked I got the more mistakes I made...and I was ready to strangle someone.

On the drive back to Cheraw it occured to me that part of my mood might perhaps have a basis in low blood sugar, as that can make me very very cranky. I drank orange juice when I got home, and the dear child was up and ready in no time (a miracle) and got to school on time.

I then had a long meeting this morning, and got into work, to get a call that the station in Bennettsville was off the air, computer screen black, what to do??? Mitch went out and I talked him through it...so all is well.

Except for the chance of thunderstorms this afternoon, of course...

I really don't like working over there. Here has its annoying moments, but the building doesn't scare me.

[Jeff Meyerson]

Thanks, Susan.

I like "Domino" better than "Gloria" anyway, but the latter was in honorof Meghan's black bear (which WBAGNFARB).

[Susan]

And I would have played Gloria...but I can't find it.

Of course I think the version we had was by Shadows of Knight...

And you're right, no Atticus. He's on vacation, so Dorr returned to do one.

[Jeff Meyerson]

I guess the Shadows of Knight version would have done as well as it's pretty much the same. I think each was a hit in different areas of the country, if I remember correctly.

Gloria, with Dave quote!

[Susan]

I knew Dave had mentioned the Shadows of Knight version, and I think of him whenever I played it.

[Mad Scientist Weasel]

Tony - Weasel turned 40 in June and he has not found a need to grow up nor act like an adult. So please continue with your general youthful frolicking.

*leaves a special your 40 birthday blog butter (tm thingy) for DJTonyB* Watch out the confetti has an extra special surprise!

*leaves a jar of blurking birthday blog butter (tm thingy) on the back seat of the blurkmobile for Eadn*

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BOYS!!!

[Crash]

Jamester quotes Indy.
Also it seems cranky is going around like the flu.

[jamester]

yeah, it's one of my all-time fovorite movie lines. Would you guys care to nominate your favorites? Might be a good topic for the day, although I'm sure we've done it before at some time or other...

[Jeff Meyerson]

Toga! Toga! Toga!

No, seriously...Looks like I picked a bad day to give up heroin.

[Crash]

"I dunno, I'm making it up as I go."

I also like (from other movies)
"I'm not bad, I'm just drawn that way."
and
"THIS... is my BOOMSTICK!"

But you don't want to get into this topic with me.
I keep going and going. My father and I communicate only in movie quotes.

[Jeff Meyerson]

I tried posting this once with no luck, so if it turns up twice blame pypetad:

"See if you can guess what I am now....I'm a zit. Get it?"

"My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die."

"Face it Flounder. You threw up on Dean Wormer."

"You stick out like a sore thumb around here."
"Me? What about you?"
"I fit in better than you. At least I'm wearing cowboy boots."
"Oh yeah, you blend."

"Don't you see the rest of the country looks upon New York like we're left-wing, communist, Jewish, homosexual pornographers? I think of us that way sometimes and I live here."

"Perhaps the laws of physics cease to exist on your stove. Were these magic grits? Did you buy them from the same guy who sold Jack his beanstalk beans?"

Now you got me started.

[Kaffy In Disguise (With Glasses)]

Yep.. my post from last night didn't get posted (well, the second one.. I tried to post after Thumper's double)

Guten morgen all.

[Crash]

Joey, ...have you... ever been in a Turkish Prison?

Where do these stairs go?
They go up!

I'm torn between feeling very sorry for you, and finding you terribly attractive.

Ever dance with the Devil in the pale moonlight?

Well, then the law is crazy.
(and same movie) My, that's a big one.

They DYED me this color!

Very small rocks!

[slyeyes]

Regarding Meghan's freaking out about a squirrel, her explanation was that at first, she thought it was a rat.

OK, rats are scary, but bears even more so.

[Jeff Meyerson]

I told Jackie the black bear story and her reaction was much the same as yours, minus the extra parental hysteria.

Basically, "IS SHE CRAZY?"

Note to Meghan: squirrels, bushy tail; rats, not.

[Leetie]

Heinikin?!?! F##k that $hit! PABST BLUE RIBBON!

It happens sometimes. People just explode. Natural causes.

BIG-BOO-TAY! TAY! TAY!

The ratio of people to cake is too big.

[jamester]

Oh, Elvis isn't dead. He just went home.

Laugh while you can, Monkey-Boy!

[Mad Scientist Weasel]

Sucking all the marrow out of life doesn't mean choking on the bone.

There is a time for daring and a time for caution, and a wise man knows which is called for.

[Mad Scientist Weasel]

I like to think of Jesus as a mischievous badger.

Death cannot stop true love. All it can do is delay it for a while.

[Jeff Meyerson]

This definitely rates about a 9.0 on my weird-shit-o-meter.

I hate the living.

Alright, virgins to the left, non-virgins to the right. [to Crocket and Wheels] You guys split 'em up however you want.

IT JUST DOESN'T MATTER! IT JUST DOESN'T MATTER!

[Jeff Meyerson]

Human sacrifice, dogs and cats living together - mass hysteria.

They FUCK YOU at the drive-thru, okay? They FUCK YOU at the drive-thru! They know you're gonna be miles away before you find out you got fucked! They know you're not gonna turn around and go back, they don't care. So who gets fucked? Ol' Leo Getz! Okay, sure! I don't give a fuck! I'm not eating this tuna, okay?

(My sister quotes this one all the time.)

[Jeff Meyerson]

Yeah, well at least your name isn't Michael Bolton.
You know there's nothing wrong with that name.
There was nothing wrong with it... until I was about 12 years old and that no-talent ass clown became famous and started winning Grammys.

[Crash]

And then GOD showed up.

[Kaffy In Disguise (With Glasses)]

People who talk in metaphors should shampoo my crotch.

It's 106 miles to Chicago, we got a full tank of gas, half a pack of cigarettes, it's dark, and we're wearing sunglasses.
Hit it.

[kibby F5™]

40 is the new 38... or something like that.

Is SO totally screwed...

[Kaffy In Disguise (With Glasses)]

ooh, can I watch, Kibby?

[kibby F5™]

"Film at 11!" ;-)

[Jeff Meyerson]

This is not a quote, by the way:

I don't think you should be able to see the air, you know? Since yesterday afternoon it's been soupy out there and will be until the front comes through with thunderstorms this afternoon.

Can't wait.

And how are we all this morning?

Not that the Yankees are likely to be the recipient of the benefits, but Yay! for the AL winning the All-Star Game for the 10th time in 11 years. They are so far the better league at this point that there is no comparison.

Of course, as St. Louis can attest, this does not necessarily mean they will win the World Series.

Gas prices have gone UP a few cents here.

WTFBBQ?

/end morning update

[Jeff Meyerson]

THis is:

I want all of you to get up out of your chairs. I want you to get up right now and go to the window. Open it, and stick your head out, and yell, [shouting] 'I'M AS MAD AS HELL, AND I'M NOT GOING TO TAKE THIS ANYMORE!'

[Leetie]

In this world there's two kinds of people, my friend: Those with loaded guns and those who dig. You dig.

[Jeff Meyerson]

Over? Did you say 'over'? Nothing is over until we say it is. Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor?

You know what, Stan, if you want me to wear 37 pieces of flair, like your pretty boy over there, Brian, why don't you just make the minimum 37 pieces of flair?

[trillian]

NEARly headless? how can anyone be NEARly headless?

[Jeff Meyerson]

So, (and apropos Trillian's line) we were going to wait but Jackie decided we should order the last Harry Potter book after all.

[kibby F5™]

*walks around 'nearly' pantsless*

[jamester]

My way doesn't sound very sporting...

[jamester]

'Follow the spiders'? Why couldn't it be 'follow the butterflies'?

[trillian]

Gentlemen, you can’t fight in here! This is the War Room!

[Jeff Meyerson]

Well, boys, I reckon this is it - nuclear combat toe to toe with the Roosskies.

Survival kit contents check. In them you'll find: one forty-five caliber automatic; two boxes of ammunition; four days' concentrated emergency rations; one drug issue containing antibiotics, morphine, vitamin pills, pep pills, sleeping pills, tranquilizer pills; one miniature combination Russian phrase book and Bible; one hundred dollars in rubles; one hundred dollars in gold; nine packs of chewing gum; one issue of prophylactics; three lipsticks; three pair of nylon stockings. Shoot, a fella' could have a pretty good weekend in Vegas with all that stuff.

And since I'm quoting the great Slim Pickens:

God darnit, Mr. Lamarr, you use your tongue prettier than a twenty dollar whore.

[jamester]

Can't swim? Hell, Kid, the fall alone will kill ya!

[Jeff Meyerson]

I'll have what she's having.

[jamester]

Hump? What hump?

[kibby F5™]

My, what knockers!

[Susan]

As Jeff said, before I could...It just doesn't matter!

But I like the lead up to it..."And even if we win, if we win, HAH! Even if we play so far above our heads that our noses bleed for a week to ten days; even if God in Heaven above points his hand at our side of the field; even if every man woman and child joined hands together and prayed for us to win, it just wouldn't matter because all the really good looking girls would still go out with the guys from Mohawk because they've got all the money! It just doesn't matter if we win or if we lose. IT JUST DOESN'T MATTER!"

And of course "Now it isn't that I don't like you, Susan, because, after all, in moments of quiet, I'm strangely drawn toward you, but - well, there haven't been any quiet moments."

And "There *is* a leopard on your roof and it's my leopard and I have to get it and to get it I have to sing."

[kibby F5™]

*wonders if the last 2 quotes were from Susan's mystery W. African "friend"*

[kibby F5™]

Got to shut down my computer. It's doing strange things. Windows keep popping up for no apparent reason ....

[Susan]

Nope, Kibby, from my all time favorite movie.

Which I haven't watched in a while...

[jamester]

*Guesses* Bringing Up Baby? Only saw it once, found myself relatively unmoved...

[Susan]

I don't know what it is about that one, but I like it. Also Philadelphia Story, and Holiday...

Katharine Hepburn and Cary Grant together I like.

Although Cary Grant on his own is good too...I need to watch Mr. Blandings Builds His Dream House again...

"If you ain't eatin' Wham, you ain't eatin' ham."

"Oh look. Mother's diary. It's slightly torrid."

Jim Blandings: What's with this kissing all of a sudden? I don't like it. Every time he goes out of this house, he shakes my hand and kisses you.
Muriel Blandings: Would you prefer it the other way around? (NTTAWWT, of course...)

"I kind of felt that he kind of felt that if I kind of told you that you'd know that he knew that you knew... or something."

And last, a long one..."Muriel Blandings: I want it to be a soft green, not as blue-green as a robin's egg, but not as yellow-green as daffodil buds. Now, the only sample I could get is a little too yellow, but don't let whoever does it go to the other extreme and get it too blue. It should just be a sort of grayish-yellow-green. Now, the dining room. I'd like yellow. Not just yellow; a very gay yellow. Something bright and sunshine-y. I tell you, Mr. PeDelford, if you'll send one of your men to the grocer for a pound of their best butter, and match that exactly, you can't go wrong! Now, this is the paper we're going to use in the hall. It's flowered, but I don't want the ceiling to match any of the colors of the flowers. There's some little dots in the background, and it's these dots I want you to match. Not the little greenish dot near the hollyhock leaf, but the little bluish dot between the rosebud and the delphinium blossom. Is that clear? Now the kitchen is to be white. Not a cold, antiseptic hospital white. A little warmer, but still, not to suggest any other color but white. Now for the powder room - in here - I want you to match this thread, and don't lose it. It's the only spool I have and I had an awful time finding it! As you can see, it's practically an apple red. Somewhere between a healthy winesap and an unripened Jonathan. Oh, excuse me...
Mr. PeDelford: You got that Charlie?
Charlie, Painter: Red, green, blue, yellow, white.
Mr. PeDelford: Check."

Of course, there is "I am not interested in discussing the grain and texture of Bill Cole's hair follicles before I've had my breakfast."

[Kaffy In Disguise (With Glasses)]

Life in this family is one subpoena after the other.

You have a wonderful sense of humor. I wish I had a sense of humor, but I can never think of the right thing to say until everybody's gone home.

and (definitely not from the same movie..)

Nobody puts Baby in the corner.

[Jeff Meyerson]

Yes, Susan, I did use the Meatballs quote for you. I haven't seen Bringing Up Baby in a while but I always liked it. And Cary Grant is usually quotable. Cary & Audrey Hepburn was another wonderful pair. I'd quote my favorite Audrey movie (with Albert Finney, not Cary) but I doubt many here have seen it ... Two for the Road.

Then how about:

Cut me, Mick! (I saw a kid with this on a t-shirt while I was out.)

Here's Cary & Audrey in Charade:

Peter Joshua: So you think *I'm* the murderer? What do I have to do to convince you that I'm not, be the next victim?
Reggie Lampert: Well that would be a start.

[Jeff Meyerson]

Back to Meatballs for a second. I always liked:

Is that a bra you're wearing or are you expecting an assassination attempt?

Or from another Bill Murray movie:

Last time I saw a mouth like that, it had a hook in it.

You're a lot of woman, you know that? Yeah, wanna make 14 dollars the hard way?

Oh, this your wife, huh? A lovely lady. Hey baby, you must've been something before electricity.

One more for Leetie:

Hey, did somebody step on a duck?

Gotta love that Rodney.

[Eleanor]

Whoare those guys?

[insomniac]

"I'd love to go with you, but I've got a class right now."

"Well, why don't you come and see me some time when you have no class."

[Leetie]

My childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon,... luge lessons... In the spring we'd make meat helmets.

[Leetie]

That's one of my faves, insom!

Wait a minute... you knew Christ?
Knew him? Shit, nigga owes me 12 bucks!

[trillian]

That rug really tied the room together

Hey, careful, man, there's a beverage here!

Hey, nice marmot!

[Susan]

Ok, it's not a movie quote...but I just saw this and it struck me funny.

It was on a site about, erm, bathroom behavior...and the selection of stalls/urinals...(ok ok, I do some quality reading. I know this.)

"Yes, throughout history, males of the species homo sapiens have barely survived feral, drooling porcupines attempting to attack their tender manly parts. Suuuuuure they have..."

[Leetie]

In ancient times, hundreds of years before the dawn of history, an ancient race of people... the Druids. No one knows who they were or what they were doing...

and

It's such a fine line between stupid and clever.

[Jeff Meyerson]

What's your favorite subject?
Poetry.
Really? Well, maybe you can help me straighten out my Longfellow.

Bring us a pitcher of beer every seven minutes until somebody passes out. And then bring one every ten minutes.

Fuck sympathy! I don't need your fuckin' sympathy, man, I need my fucking johnson!

Fair! WHO'S THE FUCKING NIHILIST HERE! WHAT ARE YOU, A BUNCH OF FUCKING CRYBABIES?

You brought the fuckin' Pomeranian bowling?

Yeah, well, The Dude abides.

[jamester]

I call that pretty big talk for a one-eyed fat man.

[Jeff Meyerson]

Have you tried talking to a corpse? It's boring.

[Leetie]

Whose motorcycle is this?
It's a chopper, baby.
Whose chopper is this?
It's Zed's.
Who's Zed?
Zed's dead, baby. Zed's dead

Bring out the Gimp.