URGENT TERRORIST UPDATE
The invasion has begun.
On more than one front.
And yet, in this great nation that we call, simply, "this great nation," life goes on.
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The invasion has begun.
On more than one front.
And yet, in this great nation that we call, simply, "this great nation," life goes on.
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The comments to this entry are closed.
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Thanks, Dave
Posted by: Brian McClure | January 20, 2005 at 05:49 AM
My first first?
Posted by: Mrs. Bickerson | January 20, 2005 at 05:49 AM
The masculine 4th arm X 2
Posted by: andy lichter | January 20, 2005 at 05:50 AM
My first second.
Posted by: Mrs. Bickerson | January 20, 2005 at 05:50 AM
My first sixth. (Okay I'm stopping.)
Posted by: Mrs. Bickerson | January 20, 2005 at 05:52 AM
"He was driving too fast, " said Baty, who was driving behind the overturned truck. "He should have known the load was going to shift."
Can squid operate a stick shift?
Posted by: Brian McClure | January 20, 2005 at 05:52 AM
Oh for crying out loud. That was my first fifth.
Posted by: Mrs. Bickerson | January 20, 2005 at 05:53 AM
Please wake me when Cher is finished.
Posted by: Mark Grimsley | January 20, 2005 at 05:54 AM
Sadly, I read the entire Cher story. I couldn't stop myself. Kill me now.
Posted by: LabSpecimen | January 20, 2005 at 05:56 AM
Cher is retiring???...who knew???
Posted by: julietine | January 20, 2005 at 05:59 AM
That's really SCARY!
The squid, however, just make me think of a hot serving of calamari.
Posted by: etc. | January 20, 2005 at 06:13 AM
From the Sun City Weekly Herald, January 20, 2035:
"Residents of Babbling Brook Manor received a pleasant surprise as Cher dropped by the Recreation Room to kick off the annual Senior Talent Search. Cher, who was passing through town on her farewell tour, graciously performed a few numbers from her show. Everyone agreed that she hasn't lost any of her zip and sparkle, although the walker slowed her down a bit. Otis Fillmore followed up with a tap dance, and Meghan Barnstead played the spoons. Cookies and punch were served after the show."
Posted by: ErnieG | January 20, 2005 at 06:26 AM
HA!
warning In the meantime, beachgoers were advised not to eat or even touch them.
"mmm squid"
"don't eat it"
"but..."
"don't"
"don't touch it"
"but..."
"don't"
"but its just lying there!"
"we have canned frog at home... you'll spoil your dinner"
"just a little piece?"
"remember the cuttlefish?"
"umm... yeah"
"he suck up on you with that fourth arm and gave you the roo roo didn't he?"
"umm... yeah"
"don't"
"umm... allright"
Posted by: Writer's Cramp | January 20, 2005 at 06:27 AM
Just another sign of the Apocalypse. Massive earthguakes, Tsunamis, Dave Berry on Sabbatical.
These were predicted by Nostradamus.
Quatrain 666
The snipe night has come
Cuttlefish, scuttle on the shore,
Elephants will have their Loo,
A very Bard, will bless the Roo.
We all are aware that Nostradamus spoke in riddles, but it obvious that "snipe night" is an anagram as well as "Very Bard", so it is not hard to see the events of 2004 and early 2005 revolve around the events chronicled on this site.
C'bol is probably Channeling old Nos' at this very moment.
Posted by: igloo | January 20, 2005 at 06:35 AM
I've heard of "Duck, Duck, Goose" but never "Squid, Squid, Cher"....
Posted by: Higgy | January 20, 2005 at 06:48 AM
California consumer alert
Do not order calamari in any restaurant anywhere in CA today, or puchase it in any store for the next week!
IMHO, a "squid counter" should be placed on patrol on each beach where squid have been found, to make sure that no one wearing a chef's hat or apron is seen with a large trash bag and a shovel!
That is all.
And to Cher, I say, Carry on, babe!
Posted by: Eleanor | January 20, 2005 at 06:56 AM
Good one Higgy!
I find that having Cher still be on tour to be strangely calming in this maddening, "Future Shock" world of ours...
Posted by: jamester | January 20, 2005 at 07:07 AM
In a follow up to WC's post, there was no "In the meantime, beachgoers were advised not to eat or even touch them." warning on the frozen squid spill. So I guess the clean-up will be easy with the gawkers and passers-by gobbling up the mess. Especially with the whole penis thing.
Posted by: Shredder | January 20, 2005 at 07:28 AM
I bet the aroma in Aromas will be quit aromatic when all that squid starts rotting.
Posted by: klynn | January 20, 2005 at 07:46 AM
Lab - IMHO, neither Berry is as cute as our Barry!
Posted by: Eleanor | January 20, 2005 at 08:10 AM
Higgy, applause
Posted by: slyeyes | January 20, 2005 at 08:48 AM
What next, exploding whales?!?
Posted by: Benny | January 20, 2005 at 10:57 AM
The squid washing up on shore proves what? That you're an idiot? "perhaps so" This site is a pointless one to boot
Posted by: Dameon | January 20, 2005 at 12:12 PM
The squid washing up on shore proves what? That you're an idiot? "perhaps so" This site is a pointless one to boot
Posted by: Dameon | January 20, 2005 at 12:12 PM
Dameon! Old buddy... old pal...
It's nice to see that you're back after the operation! How is life as a woman? Anyhoo, I guess the gang down at Tinkerbell's Knob Shop and Chainsaw Repair will be glad to see you're back up to speed.
WC
Posted by: Writer's Cramp | January 20, 2005 at 01:13 PM
Ah yes, I remember the great squid wash-up the summer of '00 in La Jolla (San Diego, CA). They were smaller than the giants, but there were bazillions of them. La Jolla stunk something fierce that week (Aromas is indeed going to be very aromatic). The best thing about it though were the tourists holding them up for photos (I kid you not) next to the guys in the biohazard suits trying to clean up the beaches. Gotta treasure that photo of little Johnny holding up the bleached, bloated, falling apart squid carcass. Blech. Evidently it is not obvious to people that you really shouldn’t touch something that looks that completely and utterly disgusting.
It's always fun when the jellyfish wash up though...
Posted by: Blue Media | January 20, 2005 at 07:48 PM
Once, when convincing myself I needed a relapse of the whimwhams, I passed up a chance to try squid. (It was dried, not cooked.)
I've never really regretted that decision.
Dave Berry! Isn't that Chuck's brother?
Key quote: More than 100 Tainan city residents, mostly men, have reportedly gone to see the corpse to 'experience' the size of its penis,
Now, that's scary ... that there were more men, than women, who wanted to "experience" the size of its penis ...
Posted by: u.o. | January 20, 2005 at 09:45 PM