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January 27, 2005

THOSE CREEPING FASCIST BASTARDS

Now they want to take away our fundamental constitutional right to take a snake to a parade.

Comments

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But I never go anywhere without my snake. Not like that!

It doesn't say anything about fish.

I'll bring my shark...

What about Weasels?

No animals OR reptiles? Wow, this implies that reptiles are not animals. No wonder all the questions about weasels, sharks, and nematodes. Well, I was wondering about nematodes. Technically they are bacterial, not animal. Anyone?

The ordinance was passed December 7. Coincidence, I think not. When will the failed Clinton Administration(2008)take a stand against these violations of our rights to bear(not Grizzly or Brown) reptiles.

"Aerosol sprays, smoke bombs and stink bombs also are prohibited."

What kind of town is this????

"ordinance makes it illegal to have an animal or reptile within 150 feet of a public event unless the animal or reptile is participating.
Aerosol sprays, smoke bombs and stink bombs also are prohibited."

"But, Officer! My snake is participating!"

"But, Officer! My snake is my Emotional Support Animal!"

And finally, a question:
Why does the ordinance specify animal or reptile? Aren't reptiles considered animals?

a. 1992 and 1996

q. Election Years of the Failed Clinton Administration

"Participating Reptiles" WBAGNFARB.

I think we're all missing a valuable point here. After all the restrictions against vicious looking dogs, weasels, nematodes, smoke bombs, and those intent on ignoring law officials, they didn't say ANYTHING about not bringing guns. Let's just all bring guns. And maybe a flamethrower or a tomahawk. Violence makes any public gathering fun!

a. 2008

Q. Beginning of the next failed Clinton Adminitstration.

I'd say a snake can definitely be classified as a Service Reptile. It provides the service of keeping people far away.

I'm with Rainy Daze - when I resided in Houston, hand guns were welcomed almost anywhere, but you always saw signs banning dogs, or people not wearing shirts (for good reason I might add - who wants to see an overweight redneck without a shirt on at an all-night-all-u-can-eat Chinese buffett at 3am?)

But what if the overweight redneck had on a sports bra?

That's tolerable, as long as he has shaved his back recently.

What if he was an overweight redneck without shirt on at an all-night-all-u-can-eat Chinese buffet at 3am, buuuuuuuuuuuut he also was giving away free weasels and handguns (and in some special cases, weasels WITH handguns)? Something tells me that would change everyone's tone.

Tetsu - very funny. I, personally, will not go anywhere near these damned parades as long as they disallow me to bring my familiars.

Hey wait - isn't this unconstitutional religious discrimination against snake worshippers?

MOTW -

I thought it was the 'Shes' that needed to shave their backs... now the men do too?

MOTW -

I thought it was the 'Shes' that needed to shave their backs... now the men do too?

Sorry for the dup!

Aww ... I'm down to a B-cup!

I think Dave should help the Iraqis write their constitution and make sure that all these precious rights are guaranteed somewhere in the world. It would sure make their constitution fun to read!

"Article 45, clause 3 says 'the right of the people to bring snakes, farm animals, and nematodes to public displays shall not be infringes' "

Oh when the skinks go marching in...
Oh when the skinks go marching in.
You know I want to be in their number,
When the skinks go marching in.

-1979 Last skink citing by myself on the former Waverly Plantation (the one with the albino peacocks) next to "Tennessee" Williams hometown, Columbus, MS. Ivan was woking on the barge canal...all the live long...

Good Grief, George.
Last time I was in Columbus, I saw a skink at Little Woods Mall. And that was as late as 2001.

"People along a parade route generally feel safer if they don't see anyone around them with a snake wrapped around their neck..."

But what if it's the annual snake parade?

Never saw a skink at a parade. Seen quite a few skanks though...

C-bol, I believe that is actually called the annual "lunatic parade."

Some people take their snakes to parades. Some people find $20 bills at parades.

I'm telling you, It's a jungle out there.

In the 60's, in this little town, they used the KKK to keep the people behind the barriors, and away. They're FINALLY getting around to proscuting some of the 'Snakes' that have been hiding in the swamp all of these years!

People along a parade route generally feel safer if they don't see anyone around them with a snake wrapped around their neck...

As long as the snake is wrapped around someone ELSES' neck I feel very relaxed about snakes at parades.

Hey, where's my handgun?

Does this ban extend to partial animals? Like fur coats, my old false teeth, hot dogs or Cher?

Just how exactly would your routine office of the law handle arresting a participant with a 12-foot python around their neck?

To answer previous questions about what kind of town this is/why didn't they say anything about guns?:
IT'S SOUTHERN MISSISSIPPI

I rest my case.

BarryFS: What do your cats think about this situation?

Targetgirl - nematodes originated long ago, in the time Noah, his boat, and the Great Flood.
As he was loading all the pairs of critters onto the boat, his wife asked him, "Howcum you got two pairs of frogs?"
"Where?" responded Noah.
"Over dere, by golly," she said, pointedly.
"Oh, them. The ones on the left, those are frogs. The ones on the right, nematodes."

Gulfport, MI ... along with Biloxi, AKA the Redneck Riviera ... interesting things happen in Gulfport ... I spent a week there one night ...

But Bubba loves parties.

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