IF A COUNTRY HAS A UNIFICATION MINISTER
...he should have a good unification minister name.
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January 31, 2005
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Former Chinese Secretary of State was (not mking this up) Woo Wee
Posted by: Brian McClure | January 31, 2005 at 05:27 AM
"...policy of containment against Cuba hasn't worked..."
Why? Isn't it the same size it was before?
Posted by: insomniac | January 31, 2005 at 05:28 AM
Damn - I may be first, but I have nothing to say!
Posted by: pogo | January 31, 2005 at 05:28 AM
I see Dave has activated his interest in current events and international peace. He will probably next appear on Cspan.
Posted by: igloo | January 31, 2005 at 05:29 AM
evrybody Wang chung, tonight.
Posted by: Agent 66 aka Carson | January 31, 2005 at 05:29 AM
Whew, glad I wasn't first, but now the post is really lame.
Posted by: pogo | January 31, 2005 at 05:29 AM
insom - Cuba has been leaking since 1959. Containment hasn't worked.
Posted by: pogo | January 31, 2005 at 05:31 AM
Good save, pogo -
Posted by: Eleanor | January 31, 2005 at 05:33 AM
Good save, pogo -
Posted by: Eleanor | January 31, 2005 at 05:34 AM
pogo--growing up in S.Fla, I get your point, but the container was the same size.
Only thing I could think of to say to a person coming back from Colorado: 'How was Colorado ? Still rectangular ?'
Posted by: insomniac | January 31, 2005 at 05:36 AM
Sorry guys but I do not get it...is Dave making fun of the guy's name???...is Chung Dong-young slang for something???...please explain..i want in on the joke...
Posted by: julietine | January 31, 2005 at 05:43 AM
Do the Dakotas and Carolinas have unification ministers? Does anyone even know why they're split? Have there even been talks lately?
And if they're never going to unite, can't we come up with new names? Wouldn't South Dakota, for example, see an increase in tourism if it changed its name to Beerzylvania? And wouldn't more people visit South Carolina if it were Girlsgonewildolina?
Just a thought.
Posted by: Christobol | January 31, 2005 at 05:45 AM
julietine,
As with all of Dave's humor, it is a sublime mixture of alliteration and zany effervesence. You must aquire a taste for boogers to appreciate his subtle wit.
As with a fine wine, his jokes fair better with age. This one will make a fine vintage and has a heady aroma of gym socks.
Posted by: Agent 66 aka Carson | January 31, 2005 at 05:47 AM
It should definitely be Beerolina!
Posted by: Agent 66 aka Carson | January 31, 2005 at 05:49 AM
Christobol, could you make it Beersinia and Girlsgonewildonnia?
Posted by: anon | January 31, 2005 at 05:51 AM
Agent 66,
UH?????
Posted by: julietine | January 31, 2005 at 05:53 AM
anon - I'll vote for those.
Who wants to be unification minister for Vagina and West Vagina?
Posted by: Christobol | January 31, 2005 at 06:00 AM
those Eastern West Virginians don't want us back.
Posted by: insomniac | January 31, 2005 at 06:07 AM
C-bol, there was a WesT Wing episode a while back where the people of North Dakota were trying to get help from the White House to drop the "North" from their name - they felt that South Dakota did better in the tourism busines because South had a "warmer" connotation than "north" - it was pretty amusing!
AND, I thought your primary goal in life was to live in West Vagina!
Almost heaven, West Vagina
Blue Ridge mountains,...
Posted by: Eleanor | January 31, 2005 at 06:18 AM
Christobol,
The "Unification Minister" for Penisylvania is Pat MacCrotch and West Vagina has Dick Nerpus.
Posted by: Writer's Cramp | January 31, 2005 at 06:19 AM
Hey they spelled Nuclar wrong...
Posted by: George W | January 31, 2005 at 06:29 AM
I thought Reverend Moon was a 'unification minister'?
Posted by: insomniac | January 31, 2005 at 06:45 AM
Note: According to the news article, the U.S. 'blockade' against Cuba didn't work.
"So,Mr. Shinzu-Abc,Secretary General of the Liberal Democratic Party of Japan, why do you think that 'turning' your 'back-side' against a real effort to make 'peace' with North Korea is going to work????
Have you ever thought about taking your 'marbles' and going home?
Posted by: kC | January 31, 2005 at 06:54 AM
George W - We've been through this before... it's Nucular dammit!
Posted by: Alabama Resident | January 31, 2005 at 07:00 AM
CHUNG: Trans.--Some
DONG: " die
YOUNG: " young
*DONG, as in Ding, Dong, Bell. Pussy's in the well! Who put her in? Yes, and 'who' pulled her out?*
Posted by: twix | January 31, 2005 at 07:08 AM
"And what a 'naughty boy was THAT,---to try to 'drown' poor 'Pussy Cat!"
Posted by: kat | January 31, 2005 at 07:09 AM
Christobol - very good newsletter this week - I especially liked your column re building dog house!
p.s. you still owe me a nickel for the plug last week - please send me a dime forthwith!
Posted by: Eleanor | January 31, 2005 at 07:21 AM
If they can't reach an an agreement we will boycott the Koreas.."Soul Train" will now be refered to as "Freedom Train".
Posted by: George W | January 31, 2005 at 07:25 AM
Alabama Resident,
George W. reminds me a a little boy playing with 'fire crackers' behind his mother's back even though she has warned him time and again about the danger. But of course, Georgie knows best! He's such a 'smart' little Ass!
Posted by: kC | January 31, 2005 at 07:28 AM
He reminds me of a 'talking' squid. (the one that swallowed himself,right through his little 'beak.')
Posted by: Tom | January 31, 2005 at 07:31 AM
I don't fire crackers,I appoint them to a cushy cabinet position..To Libertize and Freedomate the un-democrasers.
Posted by: Sean | January 31, 2005 at 07:34 AM
I mean George W.
Posted by: George W | January 31, 2005 at 07:36 AM
Looks like George W having an identity crisis.
Call Jack Bauer on his cell phone! This is a terrorist threat of the highest colour!
Posted by: Witchiecoo | January 31, 2005 at 07:41 AM
Shouldnt that be Seoul Train?
Posted by: queensbee | January 31, 2005 at 07:55 AM
Shouldnt that be Seoul Train?
Posted by: queensbee | January 31, 2005 at 07:55 AM
I just asked Dick Cheney and he said I am not having an identity crisis...He told me to go download some ring tones for his cell phone...Top secret..From somewhere called "the internet"..Being President is so neat!
Posted by: George W | January 31, 2005 at 07:58 AM
"George, Georgie W., Oh, Georgie!!! Wake up! George W.! It's the 'World Calling you. Hay, Little Boy, it's time to get up and study your 'Home Work'. No, you can't go out and ride your pony, first. You know you've been 'skipping' school.
We know it too. Don't think that you can 'fool' everybody all of the time. Get up and start using that thing that is located on top of your 'golf shirt'. I know that it 'hurts' but 'growth' hurts, too. Grow up, for God's sake!
Posted by: tak ful kat | January 31, 2005 at 08:26 AM
Eleanor, the North Dakota name change wasn't just a West Wing episode; it was also the basis for a Dave Barry Column.
Gee, if it's been a West Wing episode AND a Dave Barry column, it must be true.
Posted by: slyeyes | January 31, 2005 at 08:58 AM
Thanks sly - I had forgotten about that column - wasn't it as a result of that column that N.D. invited Dave to visit and name a sewage treatment plant for him, which made for another great column?
Oh Dave, please start writing columns again - how's Sophie?
Posted by: Eleanor | January 31, 2005 at 09:20 AM
Yes, Thank you Slyeyes. I down-loaded it.
Posted by: kat | January 31, 2005 at 09:33 AM
guess what the Sex Minister's called
Mr Cheung Ding Doung Well Hung
and Sly... anymore columns ? u just made my day/ night
Posted by: Bangi | January 31, 2005 at 10:06 AM
Yes, the "North" deletion was real ... altho it may have just been a publicity stunt ... but some (humor-challenged) people took it seriously enough to actually put out PR to that effect ... Dave picked up on it, and as his usual self, managed to offend a few humor-challenged gecko-brains and entertain the rest of us Nodaks, along with a lot of you folks too.
And it was a sewer lift station ... at the dedication ceremony, the mayor was fairly cute about referring to Dave's skill with similar products ... or something like that ...
Actually, what we are serious about is changing the name -- often abbreviated by certain witty neighboring states as "NO Dakota" -- to No We Are Not Minnesota ...
Anyone who doesn't think that's funny should be hung by their Pyingyang ...
Posted by: Uncle Nodak | January 31, 2005 at 06:18 PM
Whoa -- I glanced at the post and thought it said 'A Fornication Minister.' (Where's Clinton when you really need him??)
Posted by: candy tutt | February 02, 2005 at 11:58 AM