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January 25, 2005


Give it up for: Squirrel Deterrents


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Making the squirrels lign up for stuff is a good deterrent.

Note for Mister Grammar Person: Should be "Squirrel deterrents not created equal". If they were created "Equally" that would only say they're made using the same process, not that the end result is different.

Key quote: "breathing cayenne powder can cause shock."

Especially to those you breathe on.

Am i wrong or is the blog clock worse
than ever? Maybe the undeterred squirrels are the cause.

i refuse to register!!
mainly becoz they never let me...
what's the article abt?

Registration? I got a loooooooong "registration" thingy for them.... ROTFL!

Ok, so besides cayenne pepper, what else will shock a squirrel?

Nude pictures of Barry Manilow?
A signed confession from OJ?
Psychedelic David Hasselhoff images?
An invitation to Neverland? (Michael Jackson's... not THE Never Land from Starcatchers)
Anna Nicole Smith sober?

ha... cracked myself up thinking about the Anna Nicole Trimspa commercials...

"Come on guys, lets go back to the attic!"
"You got any nuts up there?"
"A whole lot"
"Holy Sh*t!"
"What's she doing up here?"
*heaving ramparts*
"Trimspa baby"
"err... um.... She scares me"
"Yeah, you said you had nuts up here, but this is ridiculous"
"Let's scram"

a haiku:

a "register" site
a post left unread again
squirrel detergent?

I'm with you mudstuffin -

Hey Dave, is there another way to see the article?:)

It says that mothballs are a good squirrel deterrent. I find that doing a vasectomy on moths is just too (not to) much trouble.

My last post made it sound like Bugmenot only works with Firefox, Bugmenot works with any browser(i think), but the easy to use extension only works with Firefox.

A good way to deter squirrels is to give them all passes to Cirque O'Liel in Europe. (forget the spelling). They will be so impressed that they will come back home and will perform 'electrifying' stunts on the high wires!
Grow Up!

Dear sir,

my cats and I, were horrified to see mention of squirrel detergent. Everbody knows that the finest detergents are manufactured from virgin moles. Lets hear now more of squirrels in the sink, they belong in the frying pan.

Arthur Pratt

Sidcup, Kent.

You know, if you have registered with the Miami Herald, you can just use that to log into The Charlotte. They are friends.

Years ago, we lived in an second-story apartment. The tenant below had numerous indoor cats and a few outdoor cats. One in particular was named "Killer". He'd rescued it from the pipeyard where he worked when they were ordered to "clean up the strays" with 2X4s. Killer would yowl constantly and get into fights with other strays at the apartment complex. I put out ground black pepper and mothballs to try to keep the cats from staying in the bushes. Several times I would dump a pitcher of cold water on the serenading felines. One morning after a sleepless night, Killer was on the sidewalk and as mad as I was, when he gave out the pathetic excuse of a meow (it sounded like static), my heart was touched. We began to feed him. When hurricane Hugo was approaching, I went home early and called and called Killer. After twenty minutes, he shot up the stairs and I tricked him inside with a dish of food to keep him out of the storm.

When we bought our house, we adopted him and he moved with us. He was became one of the sweetest pets.

As Abraham Lincoln said, "Do I not destroy my enemies when I make them my friends?"

Not sayin' you can do that with squirrels exactly.

I just did bugmenot. You can log into the Charlotte Register (or whatever it was) using these credentials:

user name = slick@slick.com
password = slick1

"He was became one of the sweetest pets."

Sounds like you slipped into a little redneck-speak there, MOTW.

A better way to deter squirrels, or at least people, would be to make them have to sign up for more websites.

I had an interesting experience once that involved a squirrel. I was sitting on a riverbank, fishing and enjoying the day, when I noticed a squirrel walking along a rock that went down the to water's edge. Right above the water line was an acorn. The squirrel sauntered (if you've never seen a sauntering squirrel, you've really missed something) down the rock, picked up the acorn, and started to chew on it.

Suddenly there was a HUGE splash and a giant catfish leaped out of the water and grabbed the squirrel in its open mouth. The fish dragged the squirrel into the river and under the water. There were a few bubbles and bits of fur which floated up from the river, and then there was silence.

As I sat staring at the spot where the squirrel used to be, the catfish poked its head out of the water and spat an acorn onto the rock just above the water line.

Nothin a squirrel hates more than Blue Jays so all ya gotta do is train three or four blue jays to patrol your attic. Problem is, blue jays are pretty high up on your obnoxiometer -- not as high as squirrels of course -- but they can get on your nerves.

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