WE ALMOST FORGOT!
Happy World Toilet Day.
Please observe it appropriately.
« Previous | Main | Next »
Happy World Toilet Day.
Please observe it appropriately.
As a final step before posting your comment, enter the letters and numbers you see in the image below. This prevents automated programs from posting comments.
Having trouble reading this image? View an alternate.
Your Information
(Name and email address are required. Email address will not be displayed with the comment.)
Here's flushing at you!
Posted by: alek | November 19, 2004 at 11:27 AM
Excuse me, but some of us celebrate Orthodox World Toilet Day in about 2 weeks.
Posted by: lurker | November 19, 2004 at 11:28 AM
The phrase "World Toilet Summit" makes me want to put on an oxygen mask, hire a couple sherpas, and climb climb climb.
We'll make base camp on the rim, and go for the handle in the morning. By this time tomorrow we should be planting our flag on the Kleenex box, high atop the tank.
Posted by: Dr. Dog | November 19, 2004 at 11:30 AM
Seems kindof mean spririted to have a "World Toilet Day" when most don't have a toilet, and are stuck reading old copies of Readers Digest in the woods and then wiping with a nearby squirrel.
Shouldn't it be "Developed Nations With Running Water Toilet Ha Ha Neener You Pathetic Neanderthals Oh But Thanks For Making Out Pants" Day?
Either way, provided there's beer, I'll celebrate it.
Posted by: Christobol | November 19, 2004 at 11:32 AM
*stares at toilet*
*looks up*
How long do I have to observe this thing?
Posted by: punky brewster | November 19, 2004 at 11:32 AM
I was out seeing a movie with Mad about a week or so ago and a preview for National Treasure came on and at the end it said, "Coming November 19th" and I blurted out, "oooh, that's World Toilet Day!" I wonder what that says about the movie...
Posted by: Mike Weasel | November 19, 2004 at 11:33 AM
"Meet Movers and Shakers.." A thinly veiled reference to doing numbers one and two..
Posted by: Sean | November 19, 2004 at 11:34 AM
Wanna to smoke some of the, uh, good stuff?
Posted by: Mahatma Kane Jeeves | November 19, 2004 at 11:35 AM
How long do I have to observe this thing?
ROFL! OMG, Punky I'm lucky I didn't get fired, arrested, or put in a padded room after the fit of giggles you gave me.
Posted by: LabSpecimen | November 19, 2004 at 11:38 AM
I'm so flush with excitement, my head is swirling.
Posted by: LabSpecimen | November 19, 2004 at 11:41 AM
What if we want to observe it inappropriately?
Posted by: Amber "not a stripper" Leann | November 19, 2004 at 11:44 AM
So to honor the season, instead of Caroling, groups of people would go door-to-door &...
never mind.
Posted by: lurker | November 19, 2004 at 11:46 AM
I'm going to be a rebel and use a kitty litter box all day.
Posted by: Amber "not a stripper" Leann | November 19, 2004 at 11:48 AM
DJT-it was Mars and Venus...I just read it again recently...
Posted by: Susan | November 19, 2004 at 11:49 AM
Key quote: "Meet the movers and shakers". Apparently, a male only gathering. I hope theey have reading material for the movers.
Posted by: the other jt | November 19, 2004 at 11:54 AM
Oh My God!..I have nothing to wear for such special occasion!
Posted by: julietine | November 19, 2004 at 11:55 AM
*Adding it to the WotM and MotM calendars*
Christobol, Punky, DJT, Amber, Julie, heck all of ya...you guys are hilarious!
Posted by: Joshkr | November 19, 2004 at 11:59 AM
Big deal, we're having the North Miami County Urinal Festivus all weekend.
Spiderwank's gonna be there. First 2000 paid admission get a free sculpture depicting the Greg Hill groping a zebra, made entirely of urinal cakes (the sculpture, not the zebra).
But hey, go ahead, observe your toilet.
Posted by: Christobol | November 19, 2004 at 11:59 AM
So on the last day of the summit, do the participants arrive at some sort of scatalogical conclusion?
Posted by: Jeff P. | November 19, 2004 at 12:00 PM
Or do the come to a divided end?
Posted by: Jeff P. | November 19, 2004 at 12:01 PM
That should read "they" -- Aww sh#@!
Posted by: Jeff P. | November 19, 2004 at 12:02 PM
Sounds like fun.. just grab a stool and sit and listen to toilet talk all day.
Posted by: Sean | November 19, 2004 at 12:03 PM
Sorry about the typo, I must have been flush with all the excitement.
Somebody please stop me before I hurt myself.
Posted by: Jeff P. | November 19, 2004 at 12:05 PM
You young whippersnappers don't know what real fun is! Way back not-so-when, we had World Outhouse Day! And before that there was World Chamber Pot Day. Afore that was Out In the Woods No Not There That's Where The Bears Go Day. An afore that. . .
Posted by: Lairbo | November 19, 2004 at 12:10 PM
I wonder if you have to do alot of paper work to get invited to sit in on the conversations...
Posted by: Sean | November 19, 2004 at 12:11 PM
"Besides a showcase of the latest products and services with a large array of innovative solutions for the restroom and hygiene industry will be on display,"
Ahh... I see you surpry I speek Engrish so werr
Oh.. and uh
*spurt*
Posted by: mudstuffin | November 19, 2004 at 12:15 PM
My name is Rucirrrre!
Posted by: Christobol | November 19, 2004 at 12:18 PM
In case anybody left on the planet hasn't heard this one:
A bear and a rabbit are taking a Greg Hill in the forest one day, and the bear says, "Rabbit, do you have a problem with sh!+ sticking to your fur?" The rabbit looks up at him and says, "No."
So the bear wipes his ass with the rabbit.
Posted by: Federal Duck | November 19, 2004 at 12:19 PM
Perhaps I can interest you in our latest model as a highschool graduation present for your son?
It's the DormJet 2000®. This baby comes with PorcelinePillow© and a mouthwash dispenser. Let's face it, if you know your loved one is going to spend at least as much time with his face in the toilet as his ass, doesn't it make sense to cater to both ends?
Posted by: Christobol | November 19, 2004 at 12:22 PM
Tout le Toilette!
Posted by: MeganBNL | November 19, 2004 at 12:29 PM
Don't you hate it when you fall asleep with your clothes on and all your change falls out in the bed, and through tossing and turning all night, several of them work their way up Uranus, so when you go cop your morning squat, like a buck fifty falls out in the toilet, and you're all like, "Damn. I could've bought an egg mcmuffin with that."
Me too.
Posted by: Federal Duck | November 19, 2004 at 12:30 PM
You lost me at "could've" ?
I'd be saying: "Woo-hoo! Egg McMuffin here I come!"
Posted by: Christobol | November 19, 2004 at 12:33 PM
I was about to pray to the porcelin deity one night, and I haul off with every intention of barfing up my socks and leaned forward so violently that I whanged my head on toilet tank so hard that I collapsed, and as I was staring woozily into the toilet, I thought to myself, "Damn. There's a buck fifty in there. I coulda bought some more beer with that."
I didn't get sick though, which I feel is an accomplishment.
Posted by: Federal Duck | November 19, 2004 at 12:35 PM
Speaking of which, I read a study one time, concerning the cleanliness of cash, considering how much it is handled, and people's handwashing habits. It concluded that touching a one dollar bill with your bare hand is tantamount to eating clam chowder out of a rest stop toilet in Alabama.
Greg Hill: You just made that up!
So? You're violating a bunny.
Posted by: Christobol | November 19, 2004 at 12:38 PM
I was eating clam chowder out of a rest stop toilet in Alabama one time, when I looked in there and thought, "Damn. There's a buck fifty in there."
I was so mad I violated a bunny.
Greg Hill: You just made that story up!
So? I violate bunnies for god's sake.
Posted by: Federal Duck | November 19, 2004 at 12:41 PM
Help! Who is Greg Hill? And why must the bunnies suffer?
Posted by: Amber "not a stripper" Leann | November 19, 2004 at 12:46 PM
I was eating violated bunny at Earl's Latrine in Alabama when Greg Hill offered me a buck fifty to watch him lick a camel.
Greg Hill: Ok, that's actually true.
Posted by: Christobol | November 19, 2004 at 12:48 PM
Fed: Hey christobol, wanna go spank some chimpanzees?
Christobol: Is a bear catholic? Does the pope sh!+ in the woods?!
Pope JP: Yes, and I read Reader's Digest and wipe with nearby squirrels.
Christobol: So you wanna spank some chimpanzees with us?
Pope JP: Of course. But Fed can't wear my hat, and I hope he quits asking.
Posted by: Federal Duck | November 19, 2004 at 12:49 PM
Amber, don't worry, the bunnies do not suffer, because Greg Hill has a microscopic penis.
Posted by: Christobol | November 19, 2004 at 12:50 PM
I just heard a report on NPR where they interviews the founder of the World Toilet Organization and he stated that ( I am not making this up) "toilets is a subject that has been neglected for too long". Also, some other guy said that he did not know that when you flush a toilet containing fecal matter, there are bacterias that jump like 3 feet up in the air...yeah, like I really needed to know that...
Posted by: julietine | November 19, 2004 at 12:50 PM
Elle: C-bol and Fed are making me laugh so hard I have to pee....
Greg Hill: That's not true!
Posted by: Joshkr | November 19, 2004 at 12:51 PM
OMG! Cristobal said my name! I still don't know who Greg Hill is, but who cares? Cristobal, the big Cbol, said my name!!!
Posted by: Amber "not a stripper" Leann | November 19, 2004 at 12:53 PM
Microscopic Penis WBAGNFARB
Posted by: MeganBNL | November 19, 2004 at 12:54 PM
When my daughters were aged 2 and 4, they developed a fetish about the toliet. Everytime we took them to a restaurant, they had to go and inspect the toliet. When we stopped at a gas station during our travels, it was the same old story. One day I caught them flushing their small Fisher Price down the toliet. I couldn't remove it, but everytime I flushed the commode to try and make the radio go down,-- -music would come out of the blessed bowl!
Posted by: kat | November 19, 2004 at 12:55 PM
I was watching Greg Hill pay Amber to watch him lick Earl in Alabama when a bacteria jumped jumped three feet and drop kicked me in the groin.
Julietine: That's not true!
Yeah, well I didn't really throw a bag of poo on Claire Martin's front porch either.
And besides, I violate bunnies for god's sake.
Posted by: Federal Duck | November 19, 2004 at 12:57 PM
Amber...Christobol said my name once. I remember it well.
I am so sick of hearing abour Greg Hill's Mojo...shoot me.
Posted by: Joshkr | November 19, 2004 at 12:58 PM
It's True.
Posted by: Microscopic Penis | November 19, 2004 at 12:58 PM
Federal,
I swear they said that!!!!
Posted by: julietine | November 19, 2004 at 12:59 PM
*walks in*
*looks around*
*walks right back out*
Posted by: punky brewster | November 19, 2004 at 01:00 PM
Elle,
Check Shanghai for the toilet. I also am sitting here with tears streaming down my face from you guys.
Posted by: Brian B | November 19, 2004 at 01:00 PM
Joshkr ... yeah, it was great, I'm still shaking. But I can't spend too much time thinking about that, I'm on to hording bunnies to keep them safe. Except the ugly ones, you guys can have those.
Posted by: Amber "not a stripper" Leann | November 19, 2004 at 01:01 PM
Blasphemy!
Posted by: ugly bunnies | November 19, 2004 at 01:03 PM
god: Fed, I did not tell you to violate the bunnies. I told you that, of all my creations, they like to screw about as much as any, so you should be able to get lucky there. I did expect you'd at least buy them a carrot and play some soft music. They aren't Cher, for my sake!
Posted by: Christobol | November 19, 2004 at 01:03 PM
I also remember saying Amber (the stripper)'s name once...my gf was so mad she got dressed and took her bunny with her.
Posted by: Joshkr | November 19, 2004 at 01:03 PM
I just took care of the peeing needs before getting caught up here, and I laughed so hard I have to go again...should only read on a truly empty bladder I suppose.
Posted by: Susan | November 19, 2004 at 01:04 PM
Hey, I needs my lovins!
*jumps fed and chris like a stoned orangutan*
Posted by: Ugly Bunny | November 19, 2004 at 01:04 PM
Wanna see me pull a bunny out of my beaver dam?
Posted by: furry party tricks | November 19, 2004 at 01:06 PM
Well Joshkr, at least you'll always have the ugly bunnies to bump uglies with.
Posted by: Amber "not a stripper" Leann | November 19, 2004 at 01:06 PM
Well done elle, ya beat me to it. 'Course I was speaking as Jeff, Demigod of Buscuits (Izzard®), so we've got it covered.
Posted by: Christobol | November 19, 2004 at 01:08 PM
Greg Hell: (banging on bathroom door) c'mon, I gotta go!
Elle and Susan: Go away! We're peeing and laughing at what C-bol and Fed said
Greg Hell: That's not true!
Posted by: Joshkr | November 19, 2004 at 01:08 PM
Every bunny needs some bunny sometimes...
Posted by: Not so ugly bunny | November 19, 2004 at 01:10 PM
hey VB, if I know Fed, you got an Egg McMuffin. How do you suppose his kinky score got so high?
Posted by: Christobol | November 19, 2004 at 01:11 PM
*outside the World Toilet Summit*
Ticket Scalper: Hey man, you need any tickets? Sold out...this is your last chance.
Greg Hill: *with Lemmywinks scrabbling to get out* Um, how much?
Scalper: How much you got?
Greg Hill: I'll let you watch me lick a camel.
Scalper: Are you planning to run that joke into the ground?
Fed: Beating dead horses is my hobby.
Greg Hill: Really? What're you doing later?
Posted by: Federal Duck | November 19, 2004 at 01:12 PM
Has anyone seen my toe?
Posted by: Bunny Lebowski | November 19, 2004 at 01:14 PM
Dear Farm and Stream
I never thought it would happen to me. I'm just an average bunny, maybe a little fluffier than some, but certainly no Thumper. So you can imagine my surprise when, while grazing in an open field the other day, none other than Greg Hill, THE MOST FAMOUS ANIMAL VIOLATOR OF ALL TIME, picked me up and shagged me until my ears drooped.
I'm having his illegitimate freak spawn, which, due to natural urges beyond the understanding of a simple bunny, I will eat. Still, I'll always remember the way his very tiny penis felt against my furr.
Sincerely,
Violated Not So Ugly Bunny
Posted by: Christobol | November 19, 2004 at 01:17 PM
This aggression will not stand, man!
Posted by: The Dude | November 19, 2004 at 01:17 PM
Bunnies were charging a buck fifty to violate Greg Hill who was rendered unconscious due to being kicked in the groin by Claire Martin, who was shooting a movie in Alabama, starring Earl "The Groin" as her ArchEnemy Jeff Meyerson.
Jeff Meyerson: Hey, That is True! She's a real cut throat.
Yeah well, Egg Mcmuffins make me puke.
Posted by: Mr.Fishair | November 19, 2004 at 01:18 PM
Farm and Stream is a magazine about the urinary health of livestock. Most people don't know that.
Posted by: Federal Duck | November 19, 2004 at 01:19 PM
Oh, they just don't admit to knowing it. But you lift up their mattresses, and there, under the hello kitty blow up bunny, you'll find the last 12 issues of Farm and Stream, or my name isn't Shaq "The Whack Snack Check My Pack" Funkmeister III.
Posted by: Christobol | November 19, 2004 at 01:22 PM
"I'm having his illegitimate freak spawn, which, due to natural urges beyond the understanding of a simple bunny, I will eat"
I think you stole that line from a play in which I acted in the 5th grade. I guess you could call it acting.
Posted by: punky brewster | November 19, 2004 at 01:23 PM
I thought it was Chrestobol
Posted by: Joshkr | November 19, 2004 at 01:25 PM
Are you kidding? That dumb bastard can't even spell biscuits!
Shaq "Whack Snack Pack Patty Smack Hold The Phone" Funkytown II
Posted by: Christobol | November 19, 2004 at 01:26 PM
Ok I feel ignored...first Claire Martin throws poo in my front porch, next Dave ignores my e-mails and now you guys...**sniff** **sniff**
Posted by: julietine | November 19, 2004 at 01:26 PM
Yeah, anyone remeber the August edition?
There was a very in depth article investigating the cause of tract infections amongst middle aged Herefords.
Posted by: Mr.Fishair | November 19, 2004 at 01:27 PM
*hands julietine a lollipop*
Here.
It helps to suck on something.
Posted by: punky brewster | November 19, 2004 at 01:28 PM
julietine...come sit on my lap and tell me all about it
Posted by: Joshkr | November 19, 2004 at 01:28 PM
Punky, I thought I paid you off? Now you're going to reveal that everything I've ever posted on this blog I lifted verbatem from your 5th grade play? Well thanks a lot.
All I wanted was undeserved love, is that so wrong?
Posted by: Christobol | November 19, 2004 at 01:29 PM
elle ... you bet your sweet ass it was acting. You see how ugly that bunny was? Greg Hill wouldn't even lick it.
Posted by: punky brewster | November 19, 2004 at 01:29 PM
Oh Yeah Joshkr...
**gives happy lap dance**
Posted by: julietine | November 19, 2004 at 01:30 PM
*hands cbol an ugly bunny costume*
now you're sure to get some undeserved love.
Posted by: Amber "not a stripper" Leann | November 19, 2004 at 01:31 PM
julietine, I wasn't ignoring you, I was just playing coy with your bunny.
Wait, does "playing coy" still involve whips and butter these days?
Posted by: Christobol | November 19, 2004 at 01:32 PM
elle ... ah, very witty, you little republican, you.
*smooches*
Posted by: punky brewster | November 19, 2004 at 01:32 PM
Julietine, if you think Josh is worked up now, you should see him with butter. The man's an animal!
Greg Hill: Really?
Posted by: Federal Duck | November 19, 2004 at 01:33 PM
FWIW, Greg just apologized for his sins over in the blog-berry thread.
Posted by: sandy beach | November 19, 2004 at 01:33 PM
Wait! I want in on this card game:
I'll see you elle's sweet ass and, well, come to think of it, I'll just call on elle's sweet ass.
*slips on ugly bunny costume and pretends he dropped something*
Posted by: Christobol | November 19, 2004 at 01:34 PM
*puts on bunny suit*
*prays*
"please play coy with me ... please play coy with me"
Posted by: punky brewster | November 19, 2004 at 01:35 PM
Julientine was at the Clinton library giving Joshkr a happy lap dance, and Hillary walks in and hands them a cigar and says "Looks like you might need this", and walked over and straightened a picture of Punky's 5th grade class hanging on the wall next to a quote.
Joshkr: It's true. I've never meet a lap dance that didn't make me Happy.
Posted by: Mr.Fishair | November 19, 2004 at 01:37 PM
Punky, that bunny costume looks pretty hot. I'd hate for you to get all sweaty. I think you should take it off. You know, for safety or something.
*sets up the PunkyCam*
Hey elle, can you move a little to the left. The lighting's a little off.
Posted by: Federal Duck | November 19, 2004 at 01:38 PM
*plays coy with Punky*
Hope you weren't planning to jog today, elle.
I promise I'll be.... happy.
Posted by: Christobol | November 19, 2004 at 01:38 PM
Christobol, you may be funnier, better looking, and have a larger winky than me, but I Beat You In That Simulpost! *wheeeeee*
*Does the Wanky Dance*
Posted by: Federal Duck | November 19, 2004 at 01:42 PM
*Grabbing Julietine* We gotta run from the photographers! Yes, just duck into this quiet little corner with me...
Posted by: Joshkr | November 19, 2004 at 01:42 PM
Elle - I'll rent you a mule (from Greg Hill's Menagerie of Pre-licked Farm Animals) - then you can get drunk off your ass later....
Posted by: Higgy | November 19, 2004 at 01:44 PM
Is not...
Posted by: Elle's ass from C-bol's pocket | November 19, 2004 at 01:48 PM
*returning elle's ass*
I swear, it was already drunk when I got it. Check with Punky, she's the one who originally bet it. I have no comment on the hickey, under advice from counsel.
Sorry Punky, but you did out me on stealing all my material from your play.
Posted by: Christobol | November 19, 2004 at 01:49 PM
OK ... I'm outta here ...
I'll return the bunny suit on Monday ... soiled and sticky, if things go as planned.
Posted by: punky brewster | November 19, 2004 at 01:52 PM
*careful hugs back to elle - cognizant of injured rampart*
How is our dubious metrosexual these days?
Christobol - hopefully that's ALL Punky's outed you on...
Not that there's anything wrong with that...
Posted by: Higgy | November 19, 2004 at 01:52 PM
Well, you shouldn't have gotten that tattoo then. It looks delicious, dammit.
Posted by: Christobol | November 19, 2004 at 01:56 PM
Elle's ass was made for running,
and that's just what she'll do.
And one day, if you're lucky,
It'll run right into you.
Posted by: rhealist | November 19, 2004 at 01:57 PM
Back to something tangible.
I just finished making a sweep of the bathrooms on both floors of my office in order to pay homage to the magnificant toilet.
I FLUSHED them all.
I gotta go I'm feeling a little dehydrated after whizzin in 16 toilets.
*beer*
Posted by: Mr.Fishair | November 19, 2004 at 01:58 PM
You know, I bet if you put 10,000 monkeys in a locked room with 10,000 typewriters for ten years, at some point Greg Hill would show up and pay them a buck fifty to watch him lick a camel.
Posted by: Christobol | November 19, 2004 at 02:00 PM