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November 11, 2004


...but I'll do it, so people will stop sending it in.

(Thanks to many people)


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To me, the funniest part of this was not the guy's kilt (hey, cross your legs when you wear a short dress, guys), but rather the comment about the Queen looking uncomfortable. I mean, has the Queen ever looked anything but uncomfortable and awkward in any photograph?

How would she know what's going on anyway, unless she bent over and looked up his kilt?

I'll thank that future veteran Colonel to hide his Privates.

What Corn said.

I see London
I see France
I'd see Colonel West's underpants
but he left them at home.

And after all that setup, all you got to see was a lot of leg! It reminds me of a Jane Magazine cover teaser (it never delivers what it implies).

Also, what Corn said.

This was just discussed on The View. Meredith Viera reminded everyone that when they had a kilt-wearing Scotsman on the show and he was asked what he wears under there, his resonse was "nothing but my wife's lipstick."

"So the kilt flapped about for all the world to see. And judging by the grin on his face, the colonel knew exactly what he was doing."

Does this sound like an excerpt from a porn magazine, or am I just a perv?

God save the queen's decency....bet she looked even more uncomfortable after she saw the pic.

sly, did he really say "nothing but my wife's lipstick"? Wow. Did Baba Wawa go into cardiac arrest?

Jeff, Baba wasn't on the show today. Maybe that's why she said it. And Meredith was quoting someone who had been on the show before.

Old joke, r.e. Scotsmen and kilts

The perennial question ... "Is anything worn under your kilt?" was asked by a young female, to a somewhat older Scottish soldier.

"Nae Lassie, it's all as good as it ever was."

(Sorry. Had to be said.)

Actually, I didn't think the Queen looked any more uncomfortable than she ever does. That almost appears to be the hint of a smile ... one may only wonder if she, too, knew what the soldier was doing.

(Baba Wawa ... cardiac arrest ... one may only hope ...)

Not really, I hope I'm not that mean-spirited. But I've never liked her ... style (or lack thereof) ... technique ... speech impediment ... attitude ... any/all of the above ... anything I've forgotten?

Same sort of instinctive dislike I had for Tricky Dickie Nixon from the first time I saw his picture in my Weekly Reader. (Yes, I'm really that old.)

Back to the Queen: Do you think she really cares?

Naked Under Their Kilts wbagnfarb

Where's the meat and two veg? The wedding tackle? ,Big Ben?, the crown jewels?, the Eiffel Tower?, the family jewels?, the frank 'n beans?, the one eyed trouser snake?, the package?, the twig and berries? For all we know, he's wearing bikini briefs

Wally, I was wondering the same thing.

Personally, I think that Colonel "cut" a "fluff" and that was the reason for the guilty looking smile on his face and the disgusting and uncomfortable look on the face of the Queen. (If we only had "Smell-a-vision!"

A young Scottish man fell asleep under a tree in the meadow one day. Two young lasses passed by and seeing the sleeping young man under the tree decided to see just exactly what they wore under their kilts. One of the girls lifted his kilt and then they both had a peek. One of the girls had a blue ribbon in her hair. So since the man continued to be in such a deep sleep, they decided to tie the blue ribbon around his "pitard." Then they slipped off quietly, giggling to themselves as they left. Eventually, the young Scot awoke. He looked down at his skirt, and feeling the breeze, discovered the blue ribbon tied around his "pitard." He said, "I don't know where it is that you've bean, my lad! But I'm sure glad that you've won First prize!"


*closes kat's parenthesis*

Ewww. I was going to suggest just ignoring the Spam and not bothering judi; but that spam is a especially egregious.

Who cares about the spam on top? We all just go right to the bottom of the page, don't we?


I hope Eleanor finds her way here with the goodies (I emailed her). I could use another cup of coffee.

Good morning!!!!!

I'm here!

Thanks leetie - we needed a push!

*wheels tray she hauled into the old MOAT over here*

It's a holiday MLK Jr. Day - how about some mimosas to celebrate both the holiday and our new

It is COLD in Cincinnati. I'm sure it's cold elsewhere, too, but I'm not elsewhere!

Lab Spec, I was having way too many computer deaths here on my laptop. The thing would just die... no shutdown, no warning, no nothing.... I found out that the CPU was overheating from a crappy fan. Seems to be a very well-documented problem with Dell Inspiron computers.

Hope you're able to figure out what's wrong with yours without too much frustration!

Good morning everyone from su.so.ca where it will be in the high 70's today, but is in the 40's right now! I see we're still here -

I'm in a much better mood today, I apologize to everyone if I was unpleasant yesterday!

*wheels in cart of coffee, lattes, Krispy Kremes, danish, croissants, chocolate hip cookies, and Special K for anyone on diet so everyone will like her again*

*is exhausted from pushing such a heavy cart*

Posted by: Eleanor on January 17, 2005 10:30 AM

Since I double posted on the horrible old MOAT that I blame all my problems yesterday on, I thought I would take one of the posts and bring it here!

Thanks Jeff

With the windchill, it's 3.7 F here. But sunny. Good thing I get to stay inside for as long as I want to, and drink chocolate milk and munch on tangerines. mmm...

Fabulous, fabulous, fabulous - it took less than 10 seconds to load!

Thought for the day:

Angelina Jolie is the new Elizabeth Taylor - discuss.

Lab- To you I say also: brrrrrr!!!

Give us a couple hours and the spam will be 500 posts behind us.

F$#%'em if they can't take joke. Stupid Spam.

Oh, and good morning Moatinoes! I trust everyone's weekend was Steagleriffic! Ours was.

I rented a wet saw and cut tile all weekend. Not exactly how I like to watch the games, but I could here it, and caught pieces of it as I refreshed my beverage (Of course I wasn't drinking and sawing, that would just be wrong ;O )

One of these days I am going to post the remodel pics I swear............until then


Eleanor, chocolate hip cookies? Sounds like something you'd get in Beverly Hills. Or maybe Greenwich Village.

Mr. Fisher -- I need you to email me your ADDRESS so I can send the book. Ditto to Kibby.

And everyone should check out the latest lilfish pics on the Y. Very cute!

And it is cold here (25 and we had a dusting of snow overnight) but is getting colder: teens tonight and 20 for a high tomorrow. Brr, got to stock up on food so I don't have to go out tomorrow.

See youse later.

Jeff, we're very trendy here in su.so.ca - that's why the rest of the country has chocolate chip cookies, but ours are hip!!!

Woo hoo! Jeff got a MB post!

I just sent judi an e-mail re location of SCROATMOAT and asking her to please delete spam - and to visit with us!

Leetie, I told her you picked the new MOAT because I think she likes you better than me and that would help!

going to check out MB now -

Jeff- Way to go on the MB posting, and e-mail coming up! (I'm such a dork.)

mmmm, Krispy Kremes! Thanks! And they're my favorite ones, The chocolate with the white cream filling.
*Heard in the background from Joshkr: Huhuhuh yeah, that's what she said*

Hey now! I thought Joshkr was busy *censoring*

And then there was that whole access the DingDing.

Speaking of access, Leetie- I need a gratutious link to your Blog. (shamefully) I have not been. Oh, and has anyone told you yet today that


Mr.Fisher, gratuitous links to xanga are not permitted here, but I'll try. Click on my name. And thanks for the plug! *snicker*

PS: Jeff suggested this moat. I just gave us a little push.

There's no event on the MOAT calendar today so perhaps we should declare this Jeff Meyerson day for
1) getting posted even though he is not Claire Martin, and
2) finding us a new MOAT -

Holy cow, Dave must have had extra triple shots of caffeine this morning with all the new posts.

I'll have to catch up later. I've got MLK day off (yeah!) and have TONS of errands.

*snags a chocolate hip cookie off the cart and dashes out to the gym -- giggle*

Push n Plug WBAGNFARB. kinda...

maybe not so much......

Leet- btw, I do have different sized plugs, but I felt that one was best fitted to this linky situation.



Oops! I just got kind of, well, not really flamed, but perhaps singed a bit, by his Daveness over on the MB for suggesting links to Ananova might be less than sporting. They exaggerate, and lie, and that's our job...

Still an honor, though...

*goes to mirror to check out new, shorter haircut with black tips*

But before I go:

For those keeping score:

1) I believe Neo suggested the moat about the Kangaroo pouches;
2) Eleanor gave it the name;
2) Jeff did the research and found it; and
3) Leetie gave us the push to move.

Thanks all for the team work!!!


Re Dell Inspiron's: during my problems with my laptop, I found out that particular model had a lot of problems and Dell was reluctant to own up to it. However, they no longer make that model of Inspiron. It was a 2600 or something like that.

Sly, thanks for the computer info. 'preciate it.

I'm actually thinking about going to a store and *gasp* buying a computer this time! It will be the first time I've done that since... let's see... carry the three, divide by my age in dog years... well... the last computer I bought was an Amiga 3000, and you'll have to do the research to see when it was made. Since then, I've built all my own computers and done all the upgrades myself.

I'm a card-carrying Geek, Level Nine.

But, Jamester, you mean Ananova stories aren't 100% gospel? I'm shocked. They're (not their) one of the main sources of my items I send Dave, along with NEWS.com.au (for the best Aussie news). And my "make ghost noises" came from there.


This story, for instance came from the Aussie site, even though it happened in Colorado.

And then there were the German poo protesters.

I always like to take credit - even when not due, but I went back to - as I now call it -Yukkie MOAT and neo appears to have first used the word "scroat" -

leetie, I saw your post re my dislike of "Yukkie MOAT" (wherever would you get that idea?) but I will always remember fondly the New Year's Eve party! Ah, when the "Yukkie MOAT was young -

*hums "Try to Remember"

Well, Jeff, it seems clear I'm in the minority here, maybe even a minority of one...It just seems a bit like shooting fish in a barrel sometimes...
But still, all congratulations nonetheless on your posting. I promise I'm not envious, I appreciate all of the bloglets offerings. I didn't mean to come off like some sort of curmudgeon...Guess the ride on the geezer bus gets a bit too bumpy for me sometimes...

Yukkie MOAT?

I loved Jamester's Weekly World News story, especially for the names and the "tsuris/matzo ball" line. Nick Spumoni?

*wonders why I'm in a barrel*

Ow!! Hey! Stop shooting! No fair! I'm in a frickin barrel for walleyesake!


As I always do, could I ask someone, anyone, to email me a link to the new MOAT?


But frankly, we don't know what we would do if we caught them red handed."

Legal experts say there is no law against using faeces as a flag stand and the federal constitution is vague on the issue.

Jeff, funniest lines in article, Jeff - we have "legal experts" for everything - I wonder if they researched the Constitution before they made that proclamation!

Press release: Dozens of Federal attorneys at taxpayer expense spent 7 working days, 6 hours a day times number of hours spent eating lunch and laughing at taxpayers researching to see if dog poo is enumerated in the Constitution/

Lab - on the LAST thread the margins are now fixed....
They were fixed, but were rebroken for a large number of us who do not use Internet Explorer to do our web browsing. I just checked, and nearly threw up, thanks to the italics. Can I sue the blog?

Blogchik, if you've gotten here, can't you copy the url from the top of your browser and email it to yourself just as easily? Just askin.'

Re: Hot guy/notsohot gal.

My submission

Maybe she's pregnant and just wasn't having a good day.

I have this page bookmarked as "Jeff's SCROAT." So every time I look at it, I'll think of your private parts, Jeff.


Sly- But I thought he was gay?!?!! ;)

Will Truman, the character, is gay.

Eric McCormack, the actor, is not.

It was probably hard for him to met women.

What kinda a pick up line would this be ladies??

"I'm not gay, butt I play one on TV."

Ya gotta have guts to wear white, that's for sure.

And what's up with that Renee Zelwigger? She can't open her eyes, she can't open her mouth, nor can she smile. She reminds me of Ernestine.

Good one, Fish! I laughed so hard I almost dropped my fudge!

It appears she did the Dance of the Seven Veils, but quit after 6.

I clicked past the previous photo and it kept getting worse. This dress is just WRONG!!

Were there pictures of Renee? I looked for them so I could say, in my mind, "Yeah, Leetie was right! What's her (Renee's) problem?"
I couldn't find any! Is this some sinister plot to make me waste time?

slyeyes, you mean the dress in the foreground or (the silvery one in the) background?

I guess, couldn't it be both?

Yes, Marvin. Everyone is out to get you, but then, you knew that already.

This woman is dying to exhale.

And yes, Marvin, the dress in the background is another level of wrong; but I was talking about the dress in the foreground that looks like goes from her bodice, between her legs and gets tucked into the back.

Ohmygosh! The woman dying to exhale is Daisy Duke!!

I didn't recognize half of the names in those photos.

I had heard that Goldie Hawn and Kurt Russell had split up, but come on!!

And, Diane, either frilly or tailored..but not both at once!

OK, enough with being a fasion nazi, back to errands.

The Czech TV is running the Golden Globes again and it would be ok IF THEY'D DROP THE DARN TRANSLATIONS!


Ok, so I'm over here in "Czech-land", but they have 2 audio channels and one would think they'd pass the original through at least ONE of them...... and to make it more bazzzzzzar, there's a woman translating for the men.

Haily Barry's left rampart being held up by her strap?

Ashley Judd looking good!

Kibby, step away from the TV!

*goes to get my 3D glasses*

*sets up 2nd tv with horizontal polarization*

Hey! Mick Jaggar's there!

Man, gotta sit a little further back....

*readjusts glasses*

We now combine in this report the stupid remark of the day with the stupid woman of the day -
Eleanor is driving down lane in Von's parking lot (going in the right direction!) at approx 1-2mph and "stupid woman" backs out of her space and hits Eleanor's car on passenger side, jumps out of her car and comes over to Eleanor where the following conversation ensues:

Eleanor: (drum roll for stupid remark)
"Didn't you see me???"
Stupid woman "No."
Eleanor "O.K."

Eleanor comes home and takes 2 Xanax!

Go figure, during the credits we get an ad for The Apprentice - in English. Like I'm going to tune in NOT.

At one time, My uncle's vision was so bad he had to sit three feet in front of the TV in order to see. But he still drove. His wife, who can't drive, tells him when to stop, when to turn, etc.

And he passed his exam like that.

He recently underwent laser surgery and his sight has been restored.

I believed the citizenry of Poplar Bluff, MO pitched in for the surgery.

I could have saved the citizenerary (or whatever that word was) a whole lot of money: Buy blinking light. Install on Sly's uncle's car roof. Avoid car with blinking light on top.

Would work Lab. You would still need to frequently replace stop signs, light poles, small children on sidewalks ....

I guess I'm picturing Poplar Bluff, MO, as being a little smaller, Mark. Maybe install a siren, too, so people can get out of the way.

Of course, none of this helps Sly's uncle, but who said I was a humanitarian?

Grrr.. "Wouldn't work"

Hrmmmm... Okay.

But that does bring up two questions.

1/ Why are the bluffs popular?

2/ Can a more permanent solution be crafted using the cliffs?

Well, I'm going to head home and see if I can determine if my computer problem is my hard drive, or my power supply. Wish me luck.

Good luck. ooommm swati ish

What are the first class accomodations like in this ScrotMOAT? I don't care for the space that I've been assigned. I would like a room that's a little less humid, please.

For anyone interested in the weather in Winterpeg, Saturday the windchill was -47 C. That's -53 F for most of you. Apparently you can 'perish' after 10 minutes outside at that temp. Right now, it's a balmy -40 (same in either scale). Jamie and I walk to the daycare in the mornings and it's just a constant litany of complaints from her. I keep reminding her how tough we are.

Higgy, you are SO in the doghouse with me. I don't know if you can ever redeem yourself.

They're heading home just about the time I show up! I hope someone missed me...

Got home to more snow than I have ever seen here and it is still falling hard. Our pipes froze while we were gone but the tenants downstairs kindly thawed them out before we got home.

I have reviewed most of what happened over the weekend. Rocky is pleased by Patriots win--ergo, so am I.

Any report yet on Rach's answer?

Sly and Jackie, I don't think the McCormacks qualify in the cute guy/not so cute gal competition. She looks a litle ditzy but reasonably cute. This mismatch is not nearly in the Billy Joel/Christie Whatsername category. Or Anne Bancroft/Mel Brooks for that matter. Just my opinion...

Jeff, I'll keep my eye on the mailbox. Thanks for the books!

Nice digs! I'll miss the swans but it's nice to load quicker.

OK, we have the snow thing under control so I guess sandy is worse off than me. But on the walk this morning the metal frames on my glasses kept sticking to the skin under my eyes. It REALLY hurt. Also, I have lousy cold. I cannot believe how bad 'Buckley's' tastes. I don't recall ever using it before but I got it today because it's supposed to be strong. There was a moment or two when I wasn't sure I was going to keep it down.

Nice of you to defer to my snow, Peri, but I think bitter cold is worse, especially when you're out in it. -11 F is the worst we've had here, which is not that bad, although with the wind chill it was more like 20 below. But Winterpeg is definitely worse.

Yes, Jeff, I'm OK except for a headache. Actually I was more OK until you had to one-up me with your better story, but since I've previously declared this to be Jeff Meyerson Day because Dave posted one of your submisions, I'm going to let it slide.

I will just mention however, that I saw on the NYTimes banner that it was 26F in NY today - it's 78F right now here in su.so.ca.!

Good to have you back sandy - and to you and Peri, please forgive the 78F temp here - I just did that to rag Jeff and your posts weren't there at the time! But feel free to come and visit!

Peri - would you prefer a suite a little farther away from the hot tub? I think that would take care of the humidity problem - there's an empty one on the second floor - better grab it before Joshkr finds us!!

I'm glad you're OK Eleanor!

In Anchorage we were two cars behind an SUV that spun through two 360 degree turns and then finally stopped in the snow piled up on the side. Nobody hit them. Reminded me that even if I can drive in the snow doesn't mean the guy in front of me can.

John? Where's Kelly?

I guess Peri got stuck in the "Fromunda" room.


LTTG as always: I only watched the lead-in to the Golden Globes. I thought Kevin Spacey did a wonderful job not staring at Lisa Ling's umm 'golden globes' , better than i did.

Mr. Fisher's caps make me think of PETER. Which in turn reminds me of all the other bloglits who have gone away. Does anybody know where they all are?

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