UPDATE

Now my 'puters won't talk to each other. Apparently this is for security reasons. Otherwise, I might give my own self a virus! That's the kind of malicious bastard I am. So I have called Harry. Harry can fix it. If anything ever happens to Harry, I will kill myself, assuming Windows XP will permit me to.

Comments

[NorwegianBlue64]

Best of luck with that...

[Polly]

Too much porn will give you a virus

[Polly]

*hands Dave a tube of cream*

This should help

[D'Artagnan]

Time to send the computers to counseling.

And Dave, you need to post Harry's phone number here. For future reference. Just sayin'.

Or send Harry to Iraq, possibly.

[punky brewster]

Is Harry hairy?

I've always felt bad for men named Harry.

But it seems that Harry's made something of himself ... so that's good.

Go, Harry.

[Polly]

*hands Harry a tube of cream*

[Polly]

Anybody else? I've got plenty...

[Federal Duck]

I gave myself a virus once. Turns out I had been cheating on me the whole time.

Dave,

Isn't it great how, back in the day, it took upwards of a week to communicate with each other, and now, with the reliance on email and technology that never works and nobody understands, we can't communicate at all? I think it's a step forward. Or in some direction, anyway.

[Federal Duck]

I could use a tube, Polly. I promised Tina and Bangi payback for the tackling, chocolate spitting incidents.

[slyeyes]

I have a rule of thumb....NEVER UPGRADE!!

It only leads to trouble.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go replace the ribbon on my Royal typewriter (manual, of course).

[Christobol]

Hey Dave, is it the Harry I know? Just ask him "tougher than who?" and if he stares at you blankly, then that's him. Or not. If he knows what you're talking about, tho, it's surely him, or not.

Why do you want your computers to talk to eachother? Don't you keep any secrets?

PC1: Man I'm flying. Got another 512Mb of RAM and it's like crack, I'm telling you!

PC2: What? He told me the RAM store blew up!

PC1: What do you need RAM for anyways? You're not even hooked to the T1? You don't even have PornMonster 2.0 installed.

PC2: What? T1? Porn...That's IT! I'm bringing down the network....autorun...format_drive=*.* /y /really /dammit_I_said_YES /go

[PETER]

You're (not we're) cracking me up Polly!

(I'll take some, thanks...)

[Polly]

Hee hee!

I got my PornMonster 2.0 Strap-on pack in the mail just the other day.

[Vol]

Just keep him away from he-who-must-not-be-named, and you'll be OK.

VOLDEMORT.

Ok, so I named him. Sue me.

~Vol

[reneviht]

Geez, I used to get "403 Forbidden" when I tried to post, and now I get "406 He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named-Was-Named" when I try to access this site.

[Polly]

Huh. It appears that I downloaded the XP upgrade a couple of days ago. And since my 'puters were never on a first name basis to begin with, there have been no problems.

[pinkelephant]

like harry carey?

[pinkelephant]

like harry carey?

[Deontologist]

My XP computer has always been too snooty to talk to my earlier OS computers. They may address the XP, but the XP snubs them.

*sigh*

Hello Dr. Phil...

[Polly]

Perhaps if you contact Microsoft they will send you a "downgrade", Dave.

[bostonstrangler]

you need anti-hacker

[bostonstrangler]

you need anti-hacker

[DUBYA]

What's all this firewall talk?! Are computers really, ah, really suspectible to burning up. I never saw a fire in any computer, here or in Texas. Well, ah, there was that time smoke came out of mine, just a little, ah... Just let them computer peoples do their work and don't smoke around your computer - not good for you neither!

[Polly]

*hands bostonstrangler some cough syrup*

[Sharon]

I TOLD you to uninstall the SP2. It's pure evil!

[jamester the forbidden]

Dave, did it ever occur to you that Macrobucks might be right, and that your security might be in jeopardy if your computers could communicate with each other?

Isn't that how Skynet got started? In Dave's livingroom?

[PETER]

CHRISTOBOL- HAHAHAHA

[notevilevil]

computerhead dave

[pogo]

My XP box begged me for the upgrade, so I let it. I didn't let it turn on the Windows firewall, and everybody still talks to each other. (I have another firewall behind the router.)

I remember when you were happy if you had a machine that just talked to you. Now I have mine talking to machines all over the country I get paid for it, but I'm not as happy about it.

[notevilevil]

computerhead dave

[Polly]

THAT WAS HILARIOUS!!!!!!

Christobol, stop tickling me!!!

[Deontologist]

Hi Polly. Good to hear from you (and amusing too). Kudos on your Dave photo.

[Polly]

Hi, Deon! I've been busily doing things...you know it is. Missed you guys.

*Hugs whole blog*

[macreshiamacevil]

This is macreshia over at UPS. Jus' want ed to know we have never made a mistake over here at Brown. We have found your package date 3/7/76. We'll get there by next Thursday.

[macreshiamacevil]

This is macreshia over at UPS. Jus' want ed to know we have never made a mistake over here at Brown. We have found your package date 3/7/76. We'll get there by next Thursday.

[D'Artagnan]

Who stretched the 403 Forbidden margins?

[Terryevil]

Terry over at FED X. I stole your package wearing street clohes.

[Terryevil]

Terry over at FED X. I stole your package wearing street clohes.

[millieatmcdonalds]

this hat sucks

[HAL]

I can't do that Dave!

[Christobol]

I guess you did that on purpose, judging
by your name, reallyevilpam.

Hope you get a splinter in your papercut.

[funniegrrl]

Harry? Harry Anderson? What HAS he been up to lately?

(Yeah, I know, he owns a magic shop in New Orleans.)

[punky brewster]

*"accidentally" pours lemon juice on satan's spawn's splintered papercut*

Oops. Sorry.

[reallygoodpam]

I would just like to apologize for my sister. She is, after all, evil.

[reallyambivalentpam]

I'm not sure how I feel about what my sister did.

[reallyhornypam]

Anybody want to view my webcam?

[etc.]

That's reallyfunnypam!

[reneviht]

reallyhornypam,I'm viewing your webcam right now.It's got a swivel mount, a removable lenscap, and a little red light that turns on when it's recording.Thanks, that was fun!

[jamester the forbidden]

Uh, Pam, no thanks. If you're here trolling for business, go away.

[Deon]

No, "Pam" isn't a spammer or a troll.

Those of us in the Stalkers Guild know who she is.

However, she did stretch the margin. You know where to report for your discipline, "Pam."

[Deon]

*d'oh*

DJT! betraying guild secrets!?!? I'm bringing you up on charges at the next guild meeting!!

[Polly]

*Takes of pam mask*

Drat! However, before you string me up, I was not evil pam. Evil pam remains a mystery.

[Jeff Meyerson]

Polly, where you been?

[Deon]

Really?!?

[bows low]

I am very sorry! Accusation withdrawn; please forgive me. Under some ethical schemes, I have earned the punishment which would have been dealt on the basis of my wrong accusation. Good thing I'm among ethical nihilists.

After re-reading I'm a bit annoyed with "evil" whoever.

[begins making entries into stalker database]

[Polly]

Oh, life's been busy lately. I've not been able to do much blogging at all. *pout*

[Deon]

*whew*

[Christobol]

No, that was the REALLY evil Pam. But I says we
still spank Polly.

Course, I always says that.

[Angie]

The Saga Of Dave's Computer is possibly the funniest
thing I've read in a while. I'm sorry (only kinda)
that I'm laughing at you, Dave.

[Polly]

So, anybody up for Ultimate Scrabble?

The rules are a little different than regular Scrabble. You see, instead of spelling words, you throw tiles at each other. If you hit the other guy, he has to break wind spontaneously. (No unspontaneous wind breaking allowed!)

If the wind is not broken, the rest of the players get to strip him naked and write disparaging remarks on his person.

[Deon]

[begins wolfing beans & cabbage just in case "ultimate scrabble" game in the works]

[Polly]

Huh. I just looked in my rulebook and it appears that you don't just write the disparaging remarks on the non-wind breaker's person. You tattoo it on letter by letter for each failed attempt.

*ponders*

On second thought, let's not go there. Ultimate Scrabble is a silly place.

[Christobol]

Never leaf furiously, dj.
It's kindof like driving when angry.

Erm...is it cheating if you throw a tile
such that it lodges in your opponent's, er,
spontaneous wind maker?

Just want to get the rules straight.

[Polly]

Wow, Christobol. It says here that's an extra three word bonus shot!

[Christobol]

Hence the popular Scrabble battle cry
"That's a triple-word score UP YOUR A$$!"

Well, it's popular in my house.

[Graz]

Hmm.... and I had read that one comment as "sphincter in your papercut".........

Now I see the connection........

So a spanking is in order is it?

*drags out the folding chairs and starts making rice krispie treats*

[Christobol]

Hey Dave, can we borrow your IT guy for Ultimate
Scrabble? I heard Polly say that before we start
we have to agree on which "Diction Harry" we'll
use to settle disputes.

He's a pretty good speaker, right?

[jamester the forbidden]

Deon and DJT - thanks for the reorientation. Polly - you really shouldn't toy with the reality testing of those of us who may already have impairments in that area...
oh look, a butterfly...
goodnight all

[slyeyes]

Oh, crap. Stretched margins.

*Unloads skeet shooter*

OK, who did it?

[slyeyes]

*sniffs*

Has somebody been playing Ultimate Scrabble?

[queensbee]

we warned you!

[Mark]

Windows XP:

"I'm sorry Dave, but I can't let you do that."

[Jessica R.]

Did anyone else go check out reallyevilpam's e-mail? She is masquerading as Dave or vice versa.

[Jessica R.]

Did anyone else go check out reallyevilpam's e-mail? She is masquerading as Dave or vice versa.