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October 18, 2004


Bay St. Louis takes action.


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Negative 1?

Snake on the Loose wNOTbagnfarb, but wbagnfarbCD.

This is no big deal. The city next to me once tried to outlaw Dihydrogen Monoxide. Really, a petition against nonvenimous snakes is no big deal.

Sounds like a job for the bureau of missing pythons. Gag! I know, couldn't resist. That was in this weekends crossword puzzle in my kittle neck of the woods.

ummm is it me, or is this a redux? I mean, how many 17 foot Burmese pythons can be on the loose at one time in this country?

You know, maybe I don't want to know the answer to that.

We must put an end to Dihydrogen Monoxide. I mean, it is everywhere. It is covering our planet and in our bodies and all sorts of horrible companies are using it. It must be stopped!!!!

By chance does "anyone" know wht dihydrogen monoxide is? For all I know it comes from ferret anal cavities. Please enlight.

It was found in the attic of the apartment building, but its four-day disappearance has prompted residents to ask city officials for help.

I dunno. I think it would have taken me a WHOLE lot less than 4 days to ask for help.

Just call Harry Potter. He's a Parcelmouth. He can translate the petition for the snake.

Here's something completely off topic. I have been reading the re-re-re-re-re-release of the Star Wars trilogy novels (the gold-covered one). On page 236, the last sentence of paragraph 6 reads "Metal ramparts raced past on three sides of them."

Metal ramparts indeed.

I will never be able to watch the trench run from the movie in the same way again.

But South Mississippi Sserpent would bagnfarb.

(Who else has to do that 'M-I-double S-I-double S-I-P-P-I thing in their head when they type Mississippi?)

We need a politician with a python plan.

I see you did the double-S for Serpent also.

I guess snake owners are just more reasonable than some pet owners. I mean, this guy basically accepts that his 17 foot long 110 pound python wandered off on its own, with no outside interference or even any hanky-panky (and I for one think there was hanky-panky, if for no other reason than it makes me happy.

But if they'd found a twenty pound black koi hiding in the attic, I'll just bet the owner would be accusing people of wrongdoing.

Now I am wondering....is this the same python that went to the movie theater in whatever other state it was. Is this python (not cleese) on a national tour? How do we know if this wasn't just a group of Mexican Milk sNakes (NOT shakes)that were just dressed up as a python for halloween? Could it be just one mutant milk sNake (not shate) that grew out of feeding from the milk of a lactating male (who works at the Springfield Nuclear Power plant? Enquiring minds want to know....

"I see you did the double-S for Serpent also.

Posted by: BigD on October 18, 2004 01:45 PM"

Yeah....that was a ttypo.

*sits smugly, knowing for once she's in the loop on the dihydrogen monoxide scam.*

Score one for the English Majors

Dihydrogen monoxide is water. There's a massive urban legend about it, spawned by a JOKE that a high school student wrote. You can look it up on Google and read more about the stupidity of the general population than you would ever wish.

Zaphod: Thanks, but too much reading, however I have come to the conclusion that dihydrogen monoxide is worse than, say a serpent in your attic. Unless of course it'syour attic. Wow! This boldface stuff does work. I guess, won't know til I post?

Shate...shete..shite..shote..shute..shake...sheke..shike..shuke....hmmmm...guess I'll choose number 6 to insert into my "sNake (not snake)" comment up above.

justlisa -

There was a news story a few months ago about how some city council in California (no surprise) actually tried to ban dihydrogen monoxide based on this web site. They also tried to ban styrofoam cups from the city. Anyone remember the name of the city?

Dude! I can't abide those anti-dihydrogen monoxide folks. I love the stuff!

If I couldn't drink my 64 oz. of DHMO every day...well, I'd just die.

Since we are so off topic anyway, is anyone else bored out of their minds at work?

30 unread emails, unanswered voice mail, a to do list as long as a burmese python, but here I am refreshing the blog just to have something to do.

Key Quote:
Neighborhood residents were circulating petitions last week, hoping to sway a vote by the City Council to adopt an ordinance against owning dangerous animals.
What can you own now? Anything you want?

"Wanna have a look at my wolf pack? They're around back. What? Oh no, really, they make great pets. Sure it's legal."

I do that every day...

so, will they hang his 'snake license' around his neck, hunh? oh wait, you wanted a fish licence? what's 'is name? Eric?

*at the "Lost Pets Support Group" in Room 17 at the local Y*

Jed: So, I just hope slinky is alright, you know? He's a snake, sure, but he needs luvin just the same as a rat, you know?

Shirley: Erm... sure. I really miss Brandy, my poor little weiner dog. Who could harm such a precious thing? Who!

*bursting in*

Cop: Oh, good. Glad I found you here. I have good news!

Jed and Shirley: Yes?!

Cop: I found your pets!

Jed: Oh happy joy!

Shirley: It's a halloween miracle!

Cop: Erm, yes. I think so. One thing, ma'am.

Shirley: Yes?

Cop: They were, uh, together...

Shirley: Oh my god...Brandy? *cries* Comfort me!

Cop: Wanna see my mexican milk snake?

CRAPWEASEL! Anybody know if the site "forgetmenot", used to get id's and passwords for magazines is out of business? Not coming up for me or do I have it wrong? *mutter mutter*

Shirley: Why Yes!
Cop: Sorry maa'm, I've been to Bankoc.

Non-native species have no local predators which could control these constrictors.

Obviously, they have not been introduced to the Smith & Wesson brothers ...

SchadeBoy - it's Parsel-tongue. Parcelmouth is the genderless title for the UPS Help Desk person.

*face turning pink, red, purple*

Zap - Thank you! D'OH!
Ironic I thought it was forgetmenot, huh?

MOTW - my thought exactly. They're all named "Bubba".

less-than symbol a href="http:/www.putyourlinkhere" greater-than symbol TEXT TO APPEAR AS LINK less-than symbol forward slash /a greater-than symbol

Like so, without the single quote marks

Damn, it looked correct in Preview. Suggest you right-click on the page and do a View Source to see it.

Should I go directly to the "I'm with Stupid" hyperlink, or is there a set of directions for this thing? I know, I know, men, directions, two words that NEVER are used in the same sentence....

Thanks, MOTW. I bow humbly before your greatness, intelligence, and your body in general; however, I do not fahrt in your general direction (iaw 'The Holy Grail'). DANG! Second Monty Python reference in a Python blog!

* Bows without fahrting in Zaphod's general direction * Thank you, thank you very much *spoken like Elvis since you mentioned him*

Fark!! I'm still reelingfrom bold type.

Thank you VERY much, djtonyb. It was infuriating to not get it to display correctly!

Wow Guin, I bet you were the kid that grabbed the magician's tricks to "show" all the other kids they were fake. Thanks for ruining our joke. Now, go injest 64 oz of DHMO and strangle yourself with a python.

Thanks so much, Brad. It's delightful to come here to relax and meet hostile, obnoxious people such as yourself. If you'd bothered to read PeeJay's post, you might have noticed that I was answering his question.
Have a pleasant evening.

You're most welcome Guin. PeeJay made a funny. It was your opportunity to knock it out of the park, maybe something like:

There must be an epidemic! It also comes from canine and feline anal cavaties!!

But no, you've been watching way too much MythBusters on Discovery channel and had to reveal the truth about Dihydrogen Monoxide. Speaking of anal, is the rumor about you true? Something about your relatives bolting down the furniture when you come over and a pressure differential between a certain body cavity and the outside world? You know, so you don't suck up the furniture...

Anyway, lighten up :-).

And the same to you too.

Guin, you're a Nazi. There, I invoked Godwin's Law. End of argument. This will not be the MOAFW.


That DHMO thing is old, old, old anyway. Saw that in an email being passed around the office, back in, oh, 1997? I would have figured that by now, just about everyone had seen it in one form or another. Wouldn't have thought it would be any big deal giving that one away. Ancient joke.

Gregg, ramparts are old too but we have a good time with them. The people here used to mostly be playful and fun. Now, we have people like Guin who have turned this into a tech support forum. Get this, she didn't even see any humor in my Godwin's Law comment -- wrote me personally to say how difficult it would be for her to be a Nazi. Did she just get an AOL account or something? Egads. This is Dave Barry's blog, people, not Jay Leno's. There is something to be said for a little bit of subtlety, no?

Guin, I was not calling you a Nazi "for real". I was being funny. It's funny because on the Internet, whenever people get into a discussion, someone eventually yells "Nazi".

Anyway, I apologize to all the stupid and/or sensitive people that I may have confused here by bringing up the impending DHMO catastrophe. And I now return you to "Tech Support forum starrring Guin". Hasta la pasta...

Can't we all just get along?

Returning to humour: But what if the snake can't read the petition?

Hum a few bars and fake it!

Groucho Marx
~ Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend. Inside a dog, it's too dark to read.
~ Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot.
~ A child of five would understand this. Send someone to fetch a child of five.

Hey, did you hear ?

Brad's a Nazi !

It must be true because I done read it on the innernet.

Play nice, people! I go on this blog to relax, laugh, forget my troubles a little. Namecalling is declasse' here.

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