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September 24, 2004

CELL PHONE UPDATE

Sure, sure, but can they cure the common cold?

(Thanks to John Rice)

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FIRST!

*insert witty insiteful comment here*

Sure they ca. . . AAAACHOOOOO!!! Okay, I guess not.

(4:30 this morning was far too long ago)

Is there a p3n!s n|argem3nt ring tone available too?

Not that, you know, I have any personal interest in one or anything.

*ring*

ooooooooooh.

*ring ring*

ahhhhhhhhhh.

"hey, aren't you going to answer that thing?"

*ring ring ring*

"oh yeahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh."

*buttons start flying*

"ow! your button just hit me in the eye!"

"sorry."

"hey, those are nice!"

da da da de do da da
da da da de do da da
da da da de do da da
da da da...
beep

"For heavens sake honey, if you get one more call, they're gonna fall off!"

da da da de do da da

rrrrrrrrrrip!!!

whizzzzzz!!!!

*ducks as fully loaded coconut bra halves fly overhead*

YES!! Lets see that again!

Dave and I have something in common:
We are both always daydreaming about Japanese girl's breasts.

Nice one DAVE !!!

8>

oops
mebbe not dave
judi then.
STILL

Nice one Judi!

I can't believe it.
Still daydreaming about japanese girl's breasts...

This is off-topic, but is there a link to Dave's book tour dates? I probably already missed him, but possibly not.

Marketing: So anyways we're selling this ring tone and claiming it makes chicks breasts bigger.

Scientist: But.. it doesn't.

Marketing: So?

Scientist: Well.. it doesn't even make ANY sense. How would that work? It's just stupid.

Marketing: So? People are stupid. And people have money. And stupid people's money spends just as well, and we want it.

Scientist: You know, money can't buy you happiness.

Marketing: Now that's stupid.

Peri - 1-800 - BIG - THTS???

I don't get it?

Yes, I missed all the New York and D.C. dates. Shucks.

This report reminds me of a quote I once read. A European pyschologist said (in the 1950's) that the more insecure a man is, the more he wants a woman with large breasts.

Put that in your pipe and smoke it, Mr. Hideto Tomabechi.

Bismuth, man - you got to put a warning on those links! YIKES!

Now, when a guy asks for a woman's phone number, she can accuse him of thinking her breasts need enlargement....

Of course, many men might think that anyway....

The more insecure a man is, the more he wants a woman with large breasts to WHAT? How does that make him more secure?

Robber: Gimme all your money!
Insecure Guy: Ok! *hands over wallet*
Robber: Wow! Is that a picture of your wife?
Insecure Guy: Yep. I got her one of those booby-grow phones.
Robber: You da Man! I ain't taking your money. Gimme five! *smack* Up High! *smack* Down Low! *smack* You got soul!

Christo-no-bols - you just jealous of me, that's it...

Hey, this is a boon for guys. Because now, no matter what push-up bras or padding women wear as "enhancements," we'll be able to actually hear the real truth.

...Ding-la-de-da-dum-ding...
"Yep, there's another flattie."

Thanks for the explanation Bangi - that makes sense.

It's ok elle, I think he was referring to my wife's breasts. Hey! Wait a minute!

Actually, I'm not into really big breasts.

Oh crap! I suffer from oversecurity!

Mmm... breastesses...

Weasel, I usually reach for the thighs and drumsticks first.

Good thighs are nice too...

Whoops, sorry Higgy. Hope I didn't get you in trouble...

WARNING do not click on previous link at work OIYDWYMTTY(not Y)G

I think I'm the only one waiting for the breast reduction ring tone... If it didn't cost so much mine would be gone baby gone ..

PT Barnum, phone home.

Well played, queensbee

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