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August 18, 2004


Smarter than the average bear.

(Thanks to Mike Pontillo)


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Anheiser-Busch has to love this publicity.

"He drank the Rainier and wouldn't drink the Busch beer"

Can't say I blame him.

"A wildlife agent tried to chase the bear from the campground but the animal just climbed a tree to sleep it off for another four hours."

They shoulda just used the old 'lighter to the crotch area' trick to wake him up.

Now we know which beer goes best with fish.

Those Labatt's people must be livid after spending millions on an ad campaign with a guy in a bear suit, and now all Ranier has to do is run cheapo ads claiming that it's the Real Beer for Real Bears (or "Do Bears Drink Ranier in the Woods?) and just keep riffing on this theme for years. What a gift.

Think about Yogi's voice, though. Didn't he always sound about half in the bag?

The campground was soon laid to ruin
'Twas suds that the beast was pursuin'
That beer drinkin' bear
Downed three dozen Rainier
And the ranger knew trouble was bruin

They should have used Moataritas....the bear would have been so snoozed out they wouldn't have needed a trap.

slowlayne, you coninue to amaze me....

I've never even HEARD of Rainier beer....

As usual, excellent limerick.

You should immediately copyright the name and/or start a microbrewery called "Bruin Beer" with a bear as your mascot/logo. Act fast! You owe me a case of the stuff when it comes out. And a couple of mil when Ranier buys you out.

Drink Bear Whiz Beer
(It's in the water...)

This is hilarious... my husband drinks Busch barf.

Wally Ballou
Didn't the Firesign Theatre (also?) do a Bear Whiz Beer bit? I seem to remember that.

Also, I went to college for a while with Bob Elliott, Jr.

Thus proving that there is at least one bear smarter than all of those Busch drinkers. I weep for humanity, and put it to the rest of the population that the bear has earned the right to vote in November.

In fact, maybe maybe we should all just agree to go with the bear's choice in November...

Yes, leave it to a creature who's discriminating palate chooses whole, uncooked fish, garbage, and animal carcasses (entrails and all) to prove which beer "tastes better." Very conclusive.

We need to send that bear to AMBLER, Pa. to order a burger.

I wouldn't want to be anywhere in the area when that bear wakes up with a hangover.

BTW, EXCELLENT limerick, Slowlayne. How do you do it?

"Whadda ya mean I can't sleep here?! It's the f#@k'n woods innit?! Now *hiccup* get me another *hiccup* beer and get the hell outta here b'fore I eat your scalp!"

Are we REALLY sure Dave is in Athens? You know, judi could be faking the posts while he's busy chewing donuts, licking honey and swilling beer in captivity.


"He drank the Rainier and wouldn't drink the Busch beer," said Lisa Broxson, bookkeeper at the campground and cabins resort east of Mount Baker.

Great, a bear that's more discerning than the average American beer drinking consumer.

echo: Maybe I missed it ... why Ambler?

I have peeps in Ambler. Word to yo' grizzle(y)!

*Great, a bear that's more discerning than the average American beer drinking consumer*

The only differences between a bear and the average beer drinking consumer are that one grills their animal and fish carcasses before consuming and one has never set his buddy's nether regions on fire to wake him up.

Not the greatest PR for Anheuser-Busch.

Good point, Lily.

Boo Boo: Yogi, do you want some more beans?

Yogi: Hey *hic* Boo Boo *hic*. Hand me that lighter...

Boo Boo: What do you need a lighter for Yogi?

Yogi: Remember that trick the Boy Scouts in site *hic* number 12 showed us? *Hic*

Boo Boo: I don't think Ranger Smith is going to like that Yogi...

well, what do you expect??? in our state (mine and the bear's) we have as many micro-brews on a menu as actual food items, and we're darned proud of it!! i don't blame the bear. at least he's supporting local industry!

This is your bear
This is your bear on Ranier
Any questions?

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