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July 30, 2004


Crafty Sheep

(Thanks to Fi Craig)


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What about 'Stray Sheep Hostages'?

The National Sheep Association: Protecting our right to keep & bear sheep as per the Magna Carta.


I'm tellin' ya: they're ORGANIZED!

"It is soul destroying." Soul Destroying Sheep ... You've tried advancing on them, you've tried bringing a Big Dog, but there's no stopping the Soul Destroying Sheep. (Rated B for b-a-a-d sheep, no one under 17 admitted without a cattleprod.)

"Sheep are quite intelligent creatures and have more brainpower than people are willing to give them credit for"

I think the National Sheep Association is trying to pull the wool over our eyes.

[Okay, shoot me now]

Sheer Delight!

I visualize the woolly-headed critters' eyes darting left and right, then bleating "baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaanzi!" and rolling across the grids. I think Gary Larson is behind this! He must be. He should be if he is not.

I believe Harold may be behind this.


"They eat plants, flowers and vegetables in gardens.

"It is soul destroying."

Soul destroying???? Maybe "soil destroying"...

That's what you get for leaving your soul in the garden.

You may think "It is soul destroying." is a typo, but no.

See, the sheep enters the garden, bends over to eat flowers and whatnot. The gardener stumbles upon this scene, and, after removing his "bean", mounts the sheep and is sure to lock his forarms during ejaculation to avoid becoming an accumulator.

Anyway, that kind of thing tends to destroy the soul. Especially if your neighbors are watching.

what exactly is going on in england? flying cows, now garden raiding sheep. they are organized!

I'm sure it was an intensity, but soul destroying?

"Registered commoners"?

We seem to have a very farm-related theme going so far on today's blog...

We've had mounting horses, flying cows and crafty sheep. What's next? Hectic Hens, Panicked Pigs or god-forbid, Graphic Goats??

Ewe said a mouthful, Higgy.

Keep laughing, you silly humans. Just wait until we roll to a vacant lot near you, we'll see who counts then. Baaaa-d humans! Baaaaa-d humans!

The sheep are escaping their pen!
The commoners ® can't keep them in!
With one little roll
They'll destroy your soul
And eat up all the garden

Ok - somebody had to quote it:

Flying Sheep

(A tourist approaches a shepherd. The sounds of sheep and the outdoors
are heard.)

Tourist: Good afternoon.
Shephrd: Eh, 'tis that.
Tourist: You here on holiday?
Shephrd: Nope, I live 'ere.
Tourist: Oh, good for you. Uh...those ARE sheep aren't they?
Shephrd: Yeh.
Tourist: Hmm, thought they were. Only, what are they doing up in the
Shephrd: A fair question and one that in recent weeks 'as been much on
my mind. It's my considered opinion that they're nestin'.
Tourist: Nesting?
Shephrd: Aye.
Tourist: Like birds?
Shephrd: Exactly. It's my belief that these sheep are laborin' under
the misapprehension that they're birds. Observe their be'avior.
Take for a start the sheeps' tendency to 'op about the field
on their 'ind legs. Now witness their attmpts to fly from
tree to tree. Notice that they do not so much fly as...plummet.

Tourist: Yes, but why do they think they're birds?
Shephrd: Another fair question. One thing is for sure, the sheep is not
a creature of the air. They have enormous difficulty in the
comparatively simple act of perchin'.

Trouble is, sheep are very dim. Once they get an idea in their
'eads, there's no shiftin' it.
Tourist: But where did they get the idea?
Shephrd: From Harold. He's that most dangerous of creatures, a clever
sheep. 'e's realized that a sheep's life consists of standin'
around for a few months and then bein' eaten. And that's a
depressing prospect for an ambitious sheep.
Tourist: Well why don't just remove Harold?
Shephrd: Because of the enormous commercial possibilities if 'e succeeds.

Ah - I see "golfwidow" was already on the Harold quote - but I save you the click.

Ahhh damn the Dolly clones escaped again. And everyone thought she was just a normal sheep. HAHAHAHAHA

Continues the Mad Cow injections

Gives djt a margaleeta for cornoring the lab specimen.

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