CRIME IN EUROPE

It's completely out of hand.

(Thanks to Fi Craig)

Comments

[cheese_ball839]

This is why we kill Elk in America. Over here our large grazing creatures know their place. Get to shootin some elk and I guarantee a drop in Elks stealing stuff...

[Graz]

Roses and a bike? Where is that moose repellant when you need it?

[cheese_ball839]

Wow. Dave is posting way early. I thought humor writers got up at noon and stared at the word booger for an hour or so...

[bjoern]

I hate meeses to pieces.

[JubJub]

Leave it to the BBC to get it wrong. A story about an elk in Sweden, and they have a picture of a North American elk. An elk in Sweden is what we would call a moose.

Important Swedish travel tip: Should you encounter an elk while driving, do not describe it as a moose to a Swede. They may become concerned when you tell of a mus (mouse) six feet high.

[punky brewster]

Wow! I didn't know moose could ride bikes ... what with being top heavy and all ...

[Graz]

Hmmmm...that makes me wonder. Can Mrs. Lima ride a bike?

[cheese_ball839]

A moose once bit my sister....

Mind you, moose bites can be pretty nasty....

[grimreaper]

I have actually never hunted anything but I tend to agree with cheese_ball - what does moose taste like?

I had deer eating my flowers so I just sprayed them with stuff that listed as its main ingredient "rotten eggs" and that seemed to do the trick.

[Jeff Meyerson]

Good one, Graz. I was wondering about the silence on the Mrs. Lima front (so to speak) myself.

The idea that a moose (or elk) would be stopped by a bike is so silly that you have to wonder about the brainpower of this Swedish couple. I mean, why not use the flamethrower?

[waxwing]

"A moose once bit my sister...."

cheese_ball, you can't leave us hanging like that. 'splain! how? why? where? did she bite back? if so, where?

I was once stabbed by loon but that was in the normal course of my job.

[jamester]

Hey lookie over there, Marge! A portable bike rack! What in tarnation will they think of next?

[Kibby F5]

Waxwing,
Cheese_ball was quoting subtitles from a Monty Python movie. A common sub-thread in this blog.

They (MP) went to Lama's next and sacked the moose subtitle people. Then sacked the one that sacked the moose people.

[cheese_ball839]

Kibby:

No, a moose really did bite my sister....

BTW: Moose is DELICIOUS. Taste depends on how it is prepared. I prefer tenderloins grilled to medium well after being marinated in a special type of italian dressing. Add grilled veggies and OHMYGOODNESSITISSOOOOOOOOGOOD.

This is why we need to hunt. To keep the other critters from getting to uppity.

[Kibby F5]

Stand corrected.

Nothing happened with Lama's either?

Oh, how'd the moose make out?

[waxwing]

rats. I missed a Monty Python reference? It is altogether too possible. Excuse me, I think I will go fly into a window now.

[cheese_ball839]

My sister was fine, but the moose had a slight case of diahrrea...

[igwanna]

The swedish elk thing had personal consequences for me. One of the longest standing arguments i ever had with a girlfriend was with a swedish one (girlfriend) who insisted that elk and moose were the same species, because the sweedish word for moose was 'elkye'. Didn't go anywhere until this internet thing caught on and i could actually SHOW her the difference. But there are plenty of other reasons to have a sweedish girlfriend.

Also, there's a wonderful recipe for Jellied Moose Nose, that a student of mine brought to a Word class i was teaching.
Step 1: Find and kill a moose.

[igwanna]

The thing that gets me is that they thought that putting a BICYCLE on the rose bushes would repel the moose.

What did they think the moose was, a vampire?

[Tetsu]

WHEN will the Swedish government FINALLY realize they must toughen up those out-of-date Elk Crime laws?

Won't SOMEBODY think of the CHILDREN??

[Mike]

I think Mrs. Lima could ride a bicycle if she placed her ramparts in strategically placed drink holders.

[MOTW]

Hold the phone.
"Bjoern and Monica" have had this SAME moose/elk eating their roses for the "PAST DECADE". So often in fact, that they have NAMED said moose/elk "Droopy Ear". And all of a sudden, they decide to try to dissuade the moose/elk, with a bicycle and they make the news?

The really important question is: what is the name of their car?

[Lily]

Bicycles repel vampires?

[Jeff Meyerson]

Mike: LOL. (Or she could ride the elk/moose.)

[MOTW]

Lily - bicycles repel vampires if they're named "Droopy Ear."
You can also try crossing your fingers, staying awake, or hiding under a pool table.

[Lily]

MOTW,

Thank you for the info. I love Peanuts.
I have bookmarked their site:)

I am always a little wary of clicking on a link here because I never know what is going to appear on my screen. I have had some surprises at work, so now I wait until I get home to check links.

[Lmd33]

That moose/elk saw those handlebars and it was love at first site!!

[Lmd33]

Sight, I mean. Geez, this internet thing is really getting to me!

[Alexander the Timid]

I don't think anyone really knows how deep this thing goes. The rose eating was just a front. The real story is that Europe is the home of a powerful moose crimelord. He has a dangerous bicycle stealing crime syndicate. He recruits misguided teenage moose and teaches them the dark arts of his trade. Their rivals are the damn birdfood stealing squrriel gangs of North America.