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April 22, 2004

POSSIBLE CAUSE OF DEATH FOR PETRARCH DISCOVERED

Apparently, he had somebody else's head.

(Thanks to Steve)

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"Our only hope now is to make an appeal in the hope that someone who is the descendant of the thief might return it anonymously,"

That's one hell of a family heirloom!

My great-great-great - . . . - great grandfather stole the skull in 1375. It's currently sitting in my mother's china cabinent next to the punch bowl. She uses it to hold toothpicks.

In his will, your grandfather is leaving you $10,000, his favorite golf clubs, oh, and Petrarch's cranium.

I knew somebody would stick their neck out.

Vito and the Terribile Wiel Marin wbagnfarb.

Key quote: "Think of all the craniums in the world - where would we look?"

He's 700 years old. Who cares?

Vito cares. And when Vito cares, people start looking for heads, you know what I mean?

How exactly would you keep toothpicks in a skull?

Well, actually part of the neck is still attached, Punky. It makes a nice stem. Great as a center piece on the cheese tray.

Petrarch's Cranium most definetly wbagnfarb.

I know where an old Ukrainian is, will that help?

A little hot glue and a styrofoam. Of course, newer skulls have fewer gaps and holes. For instance, the infamous pirate Black Beard's skull is used as a chalice by the Dare County Junior League in NC.

Ahh...I see.

Maybe he was just a cross dresser? That would explain the long hair and makeup. Okay, so he had a woman's head. Is that so wrong? As Robert (PSYCHO) Bloch used to tell visitors: "I have the heart of a small boy. I keep it in a jar on my desk."

Has it occured to anyone that this guy might not have had a head? Many accountants and politicians function without any of the organs a head is equipped with.

Wow, after he died he still got a little.....
never mind...let's keep this a family blog.

*tucks his dirty thoughts away...and slams the door on them*

I they hadn't chopped his head off he would probably still be alive today

Don't poets and artists often lose their head?

Swapping bodies wbagnfarb

...er...61. whatever.

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