« Previous | Main | Next »

April 27, 2004

CREPING FASCISM UPDATE

Now they're seizing our children's giant snails.

(Thanks to many people)

Comments

Feed You can follow this conversation by subscribing to the comment feed for this post.

"Sometimes new clients writhe and groan in pain for some minutes immediately after taking the sting"

I swear only a guy would do this sort of thing.

first, second?

When snails are outlawed, only outlaws will have snails.

That's why I use alcohol, my anti-drug.

When I hear "giant" snail I'm certainly not thinking of one that's "about the size of a person's hand."

It should be the size of a Volkswagon!

By the way, Snail Smugglers and the Scorpion Sting Sellers wbagnfarb.

dude, a snail the size of a VW would be quite possibly the nastiest thing ever.

Like a water balloon filled with phlegm.

Yes, I can see that giant meningitis-carrying snails would be a great educational experience, but when I was a kid...my teacher gave us a handful of mercury to roll around in our hands. And even this was a poor second to being able to go down to the shoe store and put your foot into an unregulated, unsupervised X-Ray machine and wiggle your toes.

Yes, I can see that giant meningitis-carrying snails would be a great educational experience, but when I was a kid...my teacher gave us a handful of mercury to roll around in our hands. And even this was a poor second to being able to go down to the shoe store and put your foot into an unregulated, unsupervised X-Ray machine and wiggle your toes.

OOps, watch out for that first post attempt...

Key quotes:
"Punishments for importing the snails
vary depending on the seriousness of the violation,but smugglers can face fines of up to $1,000 percharge."

"People who find the snails are asked to call the
anti-smuggling hot line at 800-877-3835."

Kids these days, with their sheltered lives!

Why, when I was a boy we laughed at meningitis covered snails! We had no fear! I remember Tommy once brought a whole collection of venomous snakes to kindergarten! He didn't get in trouble, and the state didn't step in.

Course, nine kids did die.

quote from article:

"In 1966, a Miami boy smuggled three Giant African Land Snails into the country."

Anyone surprised that these giant snails wormed their way into our country (pun intended) through Miami? Anybody?

"They were very cool creatures," Joosten said.

Sounds like a much cooler principal than I had.

How about Snail Mucus as the name of a rock band?

Anytime they get rid of snails, slugs, or other assorted slimy things is OK by me!

(Now do they have a government intervention program to step in on that 3 a.m. hork my cat left me underfoot? That's always a waker-upper! :-)

So what about all my Mr. Snail paraphanalia? Is that illegal too?

I'd always suspected Mr. Snail was an avenue for infectious disease, but I never suspected meningitis!!!

And what the hell is 'creping' fascism?

And what the hell is 'creping' fascism?

And why the hell did I just post that twice? It wasn't that funny the first time!

Loady, Jeff P.! Ya done caught the Pulitzer-Prize-winning DAVE in a typo!

Will wonders never cease?! ;-)

OK, I missed it myself, I just scanned the post title and quickie-clicked on in :-)

That is unless this particular form of facism involves a thin egg pancake wrapped around a delicious fruit filling.

All facism, by definition, involves a thin egg pancake wrapped around a delicious fruit filling.

Go ahead, look it up.

Now fascism, on the other hand....

A Miami boy.

Creeping...fascism...creeping...like a snail...slow...and...nevermind.

Dangerous Snails wbagnfarb!

And I agree eadn, the government should do something about those horks!

When I was growing up in the early 60's, a great afternoon of fun in the summer was waiting for the mosquito killer guy to drive his truck down the street. Once spotted, we would run as fast as we could to catch up to him so we could plunge into the white, billowing clouds of pure toxins he pumped out of the rear of the truck.

Kids were tougher then.

Lmd33, I think I remember you! Didn't we both get demoted to the "special class" that following year?

Had meningitis once when I was a kid. Almost died. They had to give me a spinal tap. Try inserting a 4" long hypodermic needle in to your vertebrae and see how much you like you wonderfully overgrown death snails of doom!

Verify your Comment

Previewing your Comment

This is only a preview. Your comment has not yet been posted.

Working...
Your comment could not be posted. Error type:
Your comment has been posted. Post another comment

The letters and numbers you entered did not match the image. Please try again.

As a final step before posting your comment, enter the letters and numbers you see in the image below. This prevents automated programs from posting comments.

Having trouble reading this image? View an alternate.

Working...

Post a comment

Your Information

(Name and email address are required. Email address will not be displayed with the comment.)

-
 
Terms of Service | Privacy Policy | Copyright | About The Miami Herald | Advertise