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April 28, 2004

BAD HEADLINE OF THE WEEK

(Thanks to Renee Vanderslice)

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almost a gnfarb?


The inquiry continues. Indeed!

Now wait just a gosh-darned minute. Do we know the tourist head-butted the cow? Poor reporting, but I think not. The guy was a grandfather for heavens sake.

I say, LET THE INQUIRY CONTINUE!

Forget the cow butt. Renee Vanderslice wbagnfarb.

My house was built by a doctor named Vanderslice. Can you imagine going to a doctor with that name?

Why was the "tourist" in a position to be head butted by a cow anyhow?

" Look Mildred, an animal that wieghs as much as a Buick Century! Let's go put our head near it."

Another example of culling the herd by way of stupidity.

Enquiry..?

cows can be mean and nasty while they're suckling calves. Pa always said Jerseys are the meanest, but looks like this Highland cow could be a contender.

So, you who are, ahem, into cattle, can maybe tell me what's up with the horns on the pictured "cow". I thought only bulls had horns.
Am I wrong on this? Starting another inquiry here - not necessarily a funny one.

In Scotland, Highland cows are really pronounced "coos", as in a "coo d'etat".

Which must be the right way to say it. Because we all know, if it's not Scottish,

IT'S CRAP!

Garret I'm sure you meant to say IRISH.

I am fairly sure (coming from a region that has a large number of dairy farms) that both sexes of cattle have horns, and that they are just always removed in cows, and not always in bulls.
Any other rednecks out there want to weigh in?

Both sexes of bovines have horns. Some dairymen remove the horns of the females for safety due to the fact that they come in to be milked twice a day. You don't have to go around the bulls much, so they usually get to keep their horns.

I remember, when I was little, going to my Grandpa's dairy farm, where they had a cow whose horns had not been removed. I was shocked that they were trying to get milk out of bull. :-) Ah, well, live and learn.

P.S. And I am NOT a redneck. I just look like one.

Lily: 1/4 Irish here. So normally, I'd agree.

My comment is a throwback to a Saturday Night Live skit with Mike Meyers. He runs a shop called "All Things Scottish" where he basically screams at all of the customers.

jimARK you bring to mind the first time my little brother saw a cow with horns

"Look at the Bull!" he says

"Yeah, check out all the dicks hanging off of it!" replies my brother in law.

Garrett: I am pickin up what you're puttin down re SNL. I particularly liked the Kyle McLaughlin episode...

I wonder if the exchange between the tourist and the cow went something like this:

Man: Honey look, it's a cow get the camera.

Cow: Head! Move your giant head! It's like an orange on a toothpick.

Well, I guess we all know what happened next...

Cow (cont): ... it's like Sputnik it is!

Oh ... that was a mean one. I bet he'll cry himself to sleep tonight on his enormous pillow!

truly one of my all-time favorite movie scenes...

There is a small farm near my house that has these Highland cattle. They really stand out from the garden variety Holsteins. My kids refer to them as the hairy yaks and they do have wicked looking horns.

True confession: Love for Mike Meyers movies was the final point that convinced me to marry my husband. He was the only guy I knew who loved "So I Married an Axe Murderer". I knew if he had that kind of sense of humor, we'd always be okay. It's worked for 9 years

"Excuse me, miss? There seems to be a mistake. I believe I ordered the *large* cappucino.....HELLO!"

"We've got a piper down. We've got a piper down."

"Ooh. You're a right SEXY bastard, aren't ya?"

I remember seeing an interview with Mike Meyers where they asked about the whole Scottish thing (All Things Scottish, Dad in Axe Murderer, Fat Bastard, etc.).

Turns out his real dad was an Englishman -- who hated the Scotts! So he picked up endless material from his dad's insults.

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