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April 23, 2004


Have we got the birthday-party entertainment for you.

(Thanks to David Mezera)


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And I thought the clown from Stephen King's "It" was scary.


Wait a minute, what happened? Judi??? You are not actually listening to Garret are you?


I'm glad to see Buffo has expreience with straight (surely strait) jackets. He's going to be in one very soon.

My question is, does he ever work with the 7 foot bunny?


To heck with the kids, I've got a private party for Buffo. Wait, did I say that out loud?


Gad, ten people must be connected to the slowest site in the world. I'm still waiting for the main page - 5 minutes now!

Then there's the always lovable John Wayne Gacy.

(sorry for the ensuing bad dreams folks)

Can't sleep. Clowns will kill me.

The world's strongest clown has the world's slowest website.

Clowns creep me out man.

I can tear a phone book in half. Maybe I can be in show business

I've actually met Buffo - years ago, at a juggling convention.
Helluva nice guy, talented juggler, great stage presence. If you're looking for something different in live entertainment, this guy is fun.

I wondered what happened to Randy "Macho Man" Savage.

Where's Willard when you need him?

I think he's cute, and I mean if you have to have a clown at the birthday party, why not a hot one?

OMG it's the bastard lovechild of Pennywise and "The Macho Man" Randy Savage!!!! (and yes, I know others have probably already observed this, but I think this is an alarming development and bears repeating.)

All I get is a balloon many that says "who's Buffo." Based on the comments, I'll consider that a good thing.

punky, I seem to have found something of yours.

That's scary.

"ex-professional baseball player (Pittsburgh Pirates, Houston Astros and Chicago White Sox)"

ah, so he uses steroids to get those big guns.

Nice to see that Joe Piscopo is finally making a comeback.


You know you have screwed up parents when...

That's creepy. Really creepy.

Just remember it's "BUFFO". Don't order "BUFU" the clown.

What a lousy birthday party.

I have to agree with the anti-clown folks. I never liked 'em. They just looked stupid and they weren't funny.

Gotta go - Marcelle Marceau's on the phone.

I'm not sure I find this site amusing... it seems that this clown is merely some sort of wrestler with a clown costume. Does the addition of this kind of body structure actually add to the humor being presented? I think not.

Sometimes it is difficult to ascertain the humor in the links posted here...

How can the middle east peace process succeed if people can't even like clowns?

I ask you.

And still you wasted all this time trying to ascertain? I am certain that ascertaining must have some little pithy saying that goes along with it, as assuming does.

**climbs on soapbox (whatever that is)**

Funny is in the eye of the beholder - if this one didn't work for you, go to the next one. The work of a humorist is to find humor where it isn't obvious to everyone, and to point it out. Dave just gives us the chance to find it here ourselves.

And, who said it had to be funny? It isn't titled "Dave's Funny Blog." Just because Dave is a humorist doesn't mean that he is one-dimensional.

**does a triple backflip off soapbox and finds bangi again**

bangi, sweetheart, you can hide here anytime.

Punky: great car! I especially loved that pointy thing on the front. Don't know what it is but it would be great in NYC traffic!

BMX3: great site, and proves my earlier point about there being a website for everyone. The only problem is, I can't stop slapping that mime! It's the best laugh I've had all week.

Well, I gotta go. The mime is waiting.

Trolling here is a lot like shooting fish in a barrel sometimes! :-)

The Bob

Clowns are Evil!! I hate clowns and I'm not alone!

But when you ARE alone . . .

The - (you still never answer, I've asked a dozen times, can I call you "The"?)

And this (the ease of getting a response when trolling) makes you feel superior because...?

Its not like, after trying to tell you that I just don't care if you think it is funny or not about two dozen times, that I don't know who "not funny" is. As well as who is not funny. Wasn't it just yesterday that someone asked if "The Bob" was exclusively "not funny"?

Just because I know you are trolling doesn't mean I can't take the bait, if I am so inclined. Evidently, no matter how many times you get a response, you still don't listen. I've been trained to "keep teaching until they learn." So I'll keep answering.

Ronald McD is evil too

Personally, I think every parent in the world would want this guy's best trick to be getting the toys out of the clamshell-twisttied-stapled-reinforced packaging!

Elf... " Evidently, no matter how many times you get a response, you still don't listen."

my wife tells me that too! :-)

punky.... last time i heard that "little to the right" I was either in someone's sights or ...ok, I can't say this here, can i?

or is that "evil"?

Buffo seems to be a multi-talented guy, but he still scares the balloon animals out of me.

I admit it, I am scared of clowns. Mimes just make me angry.

Well, at least Dave's found someone to break open those freaking pinatas. One-handed.

Let me be first to answer Garret:


Ah ... first. I get it.

It's going to be a while before everyone
lets that go ... isn't it?

Yeah Garret, but You sure made a splash with it! :-)

Hey, I wasn't around to participate in the beating you nearly to death yesterday, so I had to...

And since you had the ba...guts...to stick around after that, I think you'll survive it.

Buffo has a visitor counter on his webpage. Did anyone happen to note what it started at this morning? Just curious. It would be quite interesting to see how much traffic Dave can drive to a Website.

*Letting go*

Aw man, now I lost it.

Off topic, but necessary.

Barry Manilow is being interviewed on Fresh Air as I speak. Step away from your radio!

That it all.

When I saw that Dave had posted it, I was prepared for total flaming. But everyone was very nice -- and funny! (Except for the whole "Tink" threat. Still don't quite get that.)

Harry: that Giggles costume is scary. Was that Stephen King's model for IT?

"Insane Clown Posse, besides being known as musicians" -- that is one great opening, BMX3!

Third (sorry), Garret: The Wonderful World of Chuckle? Is that guy kidding (I hope)?

All for now. I got a mime that needs slapping.

Of course, Jeff, you gotta slap your mime.

Okay, while I do see the euphemism here, I have to ask:

w Slap the Mime bagnfarb?

We may not be funny, but at least we aren't smart enough to know it.

Aren't we fortunate to have others around to tell us?

Garret, if you don't get the Tink threat, be very glad! :-) It doesn't apply to you or your post yesterday...just one of those things that happened "movin' West". Rest easy.

Buffo has a visitor counter on his webpage. Did anyone happen to note what it started at this morning? Just curious. It would be quite interesting to see how much traffic Dave can drive to a Website.

Posted by: Boo Augustus on April 23, 2004 02:30 PM

It read 888888, and it still says 888888. By the way, they are all upsidedown.

If Buffo the Clown would team up with Brainy the Clown, I bet his site would load faster and Brainy would be getting beaten up all the time.

A win, win.

How'd you like to scrape the barnacles off of me rudder?

I'm with all of you clown haters out there! I always thought they were a little spooky and freakish.

BMX3 - Thanks for that link! Like Jeff, I must slap the mime. Again, and again and again!

Hey Blogchik, you should add 'slap the mime' to your arsenal of Morale Improvement devices...

I was a clown in my second grade play. I however, did not have biceps as big as a tree trunk nor was I that scary looking.

Crash, if you haven't actually seen FROGS, wait until you're stoned (if you so indulge). It would improve an otherwise terrible movie (villain Ray Milland was particularly bad). See, Ray is a nasty industrialist (?) destroying the bayou egology and the frogs and other swamp critters want to get even. But the cool poster notwithstanding, the froggies just aren't very scary.

3 white house apperances huh? well if it's good enough for the president...

Jeff, I own a copy.

And I grew up in the swamp.
Therefore FROGS = Hilarity.

haha YES! we were talking about it today!

Good Luck! Dave Munger!
Maybe if You should hunger,
Your stickman will light!

Checked into your blog,
Only to find a swill bog.
Not Dave-inity!

No wonder you're lost.
You cannot find apropos.
You spew missing so!

heh heh, Dave Munger the following phrase usually brings the recipient to riot: Welcome to my world, welcome to Hell!

Try getting in tune with your audience and your music instead of thrusting your banal free-side!

My Apologies to The Blog and Bloglits, but sometimes, I gotta take a shot in the dark, just to see if there's any enlightenment there! :-)

Hey, alex! Thanks again for your support!

Lemme just step in front of you wit my Kevlar on for when Punky comes! ;-)

Suffice to say that I REALLY notice when I'm out of step or tune and would rather not dance or sing than pretend!

Nothin' like having joints like the Tin Man and half-deafness to boot!

I need help. I bought a clown car and it needs brakes. Does anyone know where I can get a set of size 12 red brake shoes?

Additionally, the car is filled with like 20 relatives of the previous owner.

That is all.

Hmm..why would you buy a used clown car in the first place?

Oh no...

anybody else out there and REALLY drunk?

gfunk, I don't know about really, but I'm kinda drrunk.

beware this site tries to put some kind of program in your startup folder. i have a monitor proggie that caught it.

Aw, Phuket. My computer's fine.

Isn't that a city in like Nicaragua?

Thailand, MeL. You mean you don't remember that post?

The city of Phuket is in Thailand.

"Quick! What's the capital of Thailand? Bangkok! *whap* "

--American Wedding

I don't believe it. I surpassed Dave's blog in posting today (albeit on 3 different blogs). Maybe Garret was right about getting a life.

But, Bangi....I like natures hills and valleys;-{)

Alex..when running on little sleep and in much pain, I remember nothing.

Aww..night Bangi! Thanks!

Dang it, Bangi! Everytime I get here, you're just leaving! These long distance relationships are tough...

Lee you could always sponsor Bangi to come to the US..

MeL, Lee, I'd second that, but she wants to bring her boyfriend and the only room I got for that is in my condo in Hell.

'Course there's room in my ice castle in alt-Hel, but it's still undergoing renovations! Oh well, they "think" they'll be done "soon" (you can gather that zombies don't have much wherewithall even if they ain't near the problems imps are! ;-)

Graz? How's that pipeline going at the Hilton? I'm kinda interested as to how much BM music motivates them imps. (Good Lord, I may just have to acquire a full settin' of BM if it works! :-)

Hey boyfriend can fit in a carryon right? And then just sleep under her bed?

Sweet MeL, the carryon is between her and him, but I would never expect him to sleep under her bed even in my own condo. I do have Respect and my own Master Bedroom should any Lass choose to come by :-)

Which reminds me off-hand, wasn't there a Doonesbury about a college-guy putting a tie on his doorknob to tell everyone he was "busy"?!

Guess then I better lay in a bunch of ties...or at least "Do Not Disturb" signs...or any suggestions?!

CD! That Is Terrifying! There comes a time when each and everyone must face the music and grow up!

Adulthood may not be great, but wailing for eternal diaper rash has got to be worse!

eadn, the imps are almost done. The BM music threat worked like a charm.

Question: Do you think that no new posts is an attempt to get us to shut up for a bit?

Or did....*gulp*..... Dave and judi get a life without us?

Graz, Answer: Yes&No, I think they all deserve a rest. Apparently the party's down a bit further in "Issue Raised". I might check in for a bit, then check out for the night. As soft as I've gotten, I wanna watch the "Space Cowboys" even though it's edited and over-commercialed on CBS I think.

In the meantime, Good Sir, lemme know when the pipeline's done! I've been working a deal to attach a Helevator shaft to it to make travelling easier :-) Especially in the heat of summer and my "temperate zone" residence ain't electrified enough to add an air-conditioner! (Hell does offer better deals and you already know the right imps! Someday, take a trip to the top and "carefully" say Hello to Cerberus on my recognizance. You should do OK! ;-)

It's true. I DO spew missing so (hangs head in shame).
Some blogs sanctimoniously de-linked this blogger I'd never have heard of otherwise, and I then linked to him. I joked in his comments that I wished people would sanctimoniously de-link mine, for the publicity. So that was a "ceremonial" de-linking as a favor to me.
No offense taken, other guy. I'm going to check out that Theories Of Life site, I like your other ones.
"Night Of The Lepus" is the greatest Deforest Kelley movie ever! Especially the close up attacks with the freaking Easter Bunny suits.

Dave Munger, I fear you have caught my LTTG virus.

I mean no offense beyond:

1! Your false-stepping and treating Dave's Blog comments section as a potential employment center.

2! Your singular and apparently solipsistic attitude that your stickman arrogance is the only opinion that matters.

3! You started out OK, I started out posting from a rough spot too, but have proven myself mixing both congenially and jarringly and else since then. One-note players need to add more to their tunes.

4! Why don't you try writing your opinion on the subject of "solipsism", how it applies to you, and the relevant effects and affectations (if any) to your posts here on The Blog?

I'll just say that I initially granted you the grace I reserve for all newbies, but your continued close-minded arrogance led to my poetry trying to push you in motion!

Ya know, if ya'd just been "Johnny-on-the-spot" with my first post to you, ya could've avoided playing LTTG joker to boot!

However, that would've meant further dissing your friend you couldn't bother meeting at the pancake house so you could pretend you were a *what?!* Dave Barry-Blog comment-posting writer!

Ware yourself, Dave Munger, seems you're a desperate lost cause on a sunken see. I will waste no more time on you. Sad. If you just stepped down a rung or two from your self-constructed ladder, you might find a better view!

Again My Apologies All 'Round, 'cept for the intended.

Not that I'm any better, but Arrogance and Foolishness are a Bad Mix!!!!

This is a real ad from someone who wants to entertain children? Specifically, my child?

Buffo really is a wonderful clown and person - actually is perfect with little kids.... Actually, my grandpa was good friends with Buffo's father (or maybe his grandfather...) I've seen him in person at our county fair - he comes every year.

I hope I didn't break any of eadn's rules of commenting, I'm not sure exactly what they are. If I have, then:
1. I am sorry about the false-stepping, the sunken see, and failing to ware myself.
2. I am sorry I link to my blog, and mention it a lot, because I like to say "blog". Some people like to say "solipsistic".
3. Enumerating random phrases gives them the superficial likeness of some kind of exhaustively constructed syllogism.
4. I am sorry that my blog contains my opinions, instead of someone else's.
5. I am sorry that I mentioned a whimsical fantasy that the column fairy might magically grant me a column. In the future I will refrain from such confounding flights of fancy, Mr Spock.
6. What the hell are you, German or something?
7. I am sorry that I made a mildly self-deprecatory remark about my efforts at writing and tendency to procrastinate.
8. I am sorry that I exhausted the Voluminous Grace of the Enlightened One with my one note playing.
9. I am sorry that I am ignorant of the meaning of such phrases as "LTTG virus" and "mixing both congenially and jarringly and else since then".
10. I am sorry that I did not realize how you thought I was supposed to respond to your poetry, and that I did not reply as promptly as I was supposed to.
11. I am sorry that I dissed my friend by leaving him alone at the pancake house with the rest of the group that meets there most weeks, and only letting him know about three days in advance that I might not make it, then trying to get some traffic to his site.
12. Do you have me confused with someone who started something?
13. I am sorry that I mentioned trying to write, that was very arrogant of me.
14. I am sorry that eadn does not know the difference between "aspiring to be" and "pretending to be".
15. I am sorry that the solipsistic attitude that my stickman arrogance is the only opinion that matters is so singular and apparent. I'm not sure what makes it so apparent though, is it the content of the strip itself? Is it the fact that some of them contain opinions, and no rebuttal from Sparky the Wonder Penguin? Or is it the fact that I mentioned it here, or something in the arrogantly solipsistic, one-note way that I link to weird Pravda articles and concur that "Night Of The Lepus" was crap?
16. I wish to thank the comment cop for his written resolution not to waste any further time with me. However, his latest missive prescribes no remedial course of action, other than that I should be "Johnny-on-the-spot" whenever he spews mansonesque gibberish. What can I do to make things right? What specific change in my behavior would render it non-solipsistic, or at least not so obviously so? Would it require a drastic ideological conversion, or would it be sufficient for me simply to phrase my comments incoherently?
17. Sorry again, I’m unclear as to the nature of this ladder that I should have stepped DOWN from in order to improve my view. Is it a one-note ladder, the proverbial ladder of solipsism, the ladder of failing to play along with some drunken word game I don't know the rules of, or what? I apparently constructed it myself, is it made out of my blog, my crude drawings of stick figures telling knock-knock jokes, actual words that I’ve written here, or out of the intangible spiritual malaise of one-note solipsistic arrogance that eadn has so miraculously surmised the existence of within the hoary deeps of my tarry black heart with so little evidence to go on?
18. Writing is fun. I actually felt kind of bad awhile ago.
19. I am sorry that I don’t have a comments section on my blog. Comment cop’s non-sequitor efforts to *push me in motion* might have been more appropriate there, if indeed whatever got up his eadnhole was from there, which seems likely, as I’ve said so little here that would clearly indicate closed-mindedness to an objective observer.
20. If someone here tried to persuade me of something by means of reason, and I said, “NO, I REFUSE TO CONSIDER YOUR POINT OF VIEW, EVEN THOUGH YOU ARTICULATED IT SO WELL”, then I think that’s the type of thing that would indicate closed-mindedness. If anything like that has transpired, I missed it. I’d hate to see this turn into the kind of comments section where people try to persuade each other of things anyway. That didn’t come out very apologetic, sorry.
21. Eadn’s vaguely hostile pity about that ladder of my own construction that I’m stuck on is appreciated, but I think it’s still a little early to write me off as a lost cause. If there’s something I keep doing that’s ruining the fun of commenting for everyone else, and someone sober were to tell me wtf that is, I’d probably want to stop doing it. I’ve no interest in rendering this place no longer fun, or in getting banned from it or anything.
22. Sorry, I‘m confused, did I DO SOMETHING?
23. Does my failure to decipher the Uni-commenter’s verbal diarrhea constitute closed mindedness? His lack of coherence and specificity forces me to speculate.
24. Hey, telling someone you know very little about that you pity them is a real classy way of trying to make a complete stranger feel bad, I’ll have to remember that one. The chances of actually ruining the other person’s day are probably pretty small, but I’ll bet it’d make me feel real big every time I said it.
25. So much more to say, but I think I’ve wasted enough time. In conclusion…

I hadn't noticed. I add links to at least a couple of your blogs later, because I'm a ho like that.

send me evil klown pictures

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