HO-HUM

Another brazen terrorist squirrel attack ignored by the so-called "Department" "of" "Homeland" "Security."

(Thanks to Matthew Alfano)

Comments

[wolfie]

*sets up squirrel repellant electric trees*

[wolfie]

*hangs up hammocks and sets up her shadows*

[DDi]

*attaches tarzan rope*
*lays out twister mat*

[wolfie]

w00t! I thought the Moat ate my suggestion. Last couple of my posts got eaten.

[Tamara]

*scrambles to shore*

*gasps for air*

[DDi]

Quick! Male MOATies! Tamara needs mouth to mouth!!

[wolfie]

Oh sure. Restrict it to just the males.

[DDi]

scratch that, erase it...

Quick! Male Moaties, or wolfie! Tamara needs mouth to mouth!!

*sets up crap cam (tm thingy)*

[Tamara]

NO! NO I DON'T!

I am now Queen Tamara, the Chased Chaste.

Men are currently despised to me. Except as non-groping friends. Give me a year or so. :P

[Tamara]

I tried to post that thirty thousand times with the second "e" in "despised" accented, but kept getting an error message.

"An error occurred while processing your request.
Reference #97.37061a2.1128704726.617ba9d"

*grumble-grumble*

[DDi]

So I guess we're here?

*decides to hold off unpacking any more goodies (i.e. Cabana Boys) until location is confirmed*

*plops into wolfies hammock and waits*

[Susan]

Is this where we are? Or am I hallucinating?

[wolfie]

Me too. *sighs* which Moat are we going to be on anyway?
Since men are despised, how do you feel about furry quadrapeds?
*batts eyelashes*

[Eleanor]

*zips in*

*exhales*

wolfie, your post just showed up on my computer.

LET'S UNPACK!!!!

*collapses*

[rita]

Tamara, Queen of the Chased Chaste, I'm glad that you're feeling better and want to let go of the bad stuff. Enjoy yourself and take care of yourself. You deserve it!

p.s. Will someone please cut the phone lines to this school? Thanks.

[neophyte]

I am SO not here. Because that would be wrong. *unpacks the moatarita mix*

[neophyte]

*cuts all phone lines, just to be sure*
I guess that is one way to find up if my boss is on dial up.

[Eleanor]

Is the hammock up yet??

I'm exhausted from all this commotion. Good thing I'm not cranky again today! :)

[Susan]

*looking around*

Here, I guess?

The playlist...

Friday 10-7-05 All Request Lunch Hour---Class of ‘85
News
“Rock and Roll Never Forgets” Bob Seger
------
“1985” Bowling For Soup
“Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go” Wham!
------
“That’s What Friends Are For” Dionne Warwick---Tina
“You’re The Inspiration” Chicago
------
“Purple Rain” Prince---Wanda, and Van
------
“The Warrior” Patti Smyth and Scandal---Lee
“All She Wants to Do Is Dance” Don Henley
------
“Every Breath You Take” Police---DDi
------
“Can’t Fight This Feeling” REO Speedwagon

I have some shy classmates...wouldn't talk on the air. And here I am, the quietest person in the class, running my mouth.

[wolfie]

*nudges neo* we're at wolfies

Posted by: DDi | 01:28 PM on October 7, 2005

DDi ~ no truer words were spoken. I just discovered I'm having a dinner party tonight. Yikes! So much for relaxing after the week from h*ll. Thank god the turkey is already cooked. Think people will require anything besides meat? I really can't cook. The turkey came pre-smoked. I may need to pre-smoke before this one. I see me starting dinner with parfaits.

Since I can get away with a really long post on a new Moat, I'm going to christen it with a bit of news.
Wolfie has gone and gotten herself slightly kinda sorta engaged. No date has been set yet, since wolfie has a few commitment issues *rolls eyes at self* and so we are taking things slooowwwwly. She also has a honking huge something shiny on her left hand.

*grins.. blushes.. and slink off to the shadows*

[Leetie]

WOLFIE!!!!! Congrats!

[Tamara]

WOLFIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

OMGWTFBBQ!!!!

CONGRATULATIONS, YOU OLE' COMMITMENT-PHOBE, YOU!

HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN DATING HIM?? YOU SNEAK!!!

[Jeff Meyerson]

So we moved? Does this place have a name? As long as it's not Miracle Whip I'm fine with it.

[neophyte]

Thank God you finally said something, Wolfie!!! Many Many smooches!

I have seen the ring folks, and it is GORGEOUS!!!

[DDi]

wolfie!

OMGWTFBBQ is right, Tamara! Yes, give us the details... how long have you guys been together? How did he pop the question? Does he have any brothers, cousins, older children (my age or thereabouts)..?

[Jeff Meyerson]

Wolfie, you sly fox you, CONGRATULATIONS!!!

It's not someone on this MOAT is it?

[DDi]

And since I so rudely forgot to say it,

CONGRATULATIONS TO WOLFIE, AND THE SOON TO BE MR. WOLFIE!

[Deon]

[jaw dropping, but declinging to yell like some people (playful smirk at bacon-queen)]

The heart has reasons that reason knows not, eh wolfie?

[Susan]

{{{WOLFIE}}}

CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!

[Eleanor]

All I have to say is:

Mr. Wolfie is a very lucky man! I hope he knows what a treasure he has!!

Any pictures???

[neophyte]

*still grinning* Some engagements are worth celebrating. *makes a toast with Pepsi*

To Wolfie and her Flavor of the Forever:
May you have a lifetime of contentment and love together!

[neophyte]

*gets pulled rudely back to werk*

[wolfie]

LMAO! I'mm tell him his new name is Mr.Wolfie. I suppose at some point I should stop calling him the flavor of the month huh?

And no, it's not a Moatie. He has 1 brother (older and married) Sorry. No other family I'd recommend to anyone I liked.

Off and on for a couple years. Then he went and got all serious on me. Ummm.. How.. in front of my family on bended knee.
It wasn't going to be in front of his family because they hate me. Seriously. It's been a lil bit stressful that part.

Sorry to make you hold it in too neo. *lick*

And Thank You everyone.
*group grope*

[Deon]

Let me also note, that I see Wolfie has been planning on bringing us here for a few days.

Leadership. College-enrolled. Relationship-committed.

How does it feel to be manifesting so many admirable traits all in the same month?

[secretly checks for pods]

[wolfie]

I'm just in it for the diamonds. *grins*

I still find the fact I'm easy to be most admirable trait Deon.

[rita]

Wolfie! Congratulations! *shields eyes*

You have GOT to put up a photo of that thing!

[Tamara]

Line from "The Philadelphia Story":

"C.K. Dexter Haven! You have unsuspected DEPTH!"

Wolfie Wolf Wolfster! You have, as suspected, depth!

Good luck, babe. :)

[zoodle]

Wolfie!! Now THAT'S wonderful news!! Congratulations, so so happy for you!! I hope you and Mr Wolfie have a lifetime of happiness!!

Can't seem to stop using exclamation marks!!!

All the best Wolfie!!!!!!!!!!!!

[wolfie]

Depth? Me? Naw. Notta chance. I'm still the same old flirt I always have been. *grins* Phone sex anyone?

I still haven't gotten to the enrolled in college thing yet Deon. I've been a wee bit *ahem* busy. ANd trust you to notice I had prepared the place Deon. The other moat was acting squirrely so I knew it would be soon.

Wolfster.. I haven't heard that since a certain young aussie dude in pool used to call me that. *sighs*

[Susan]

(This was, of course, the announcement that wolfie hinted about with a request a while back on the lunch hour...when I played "Chapel of Love" and wouldn't say who it was for....)

[Mike "Mad's Dork" Weasel]

*scampers in here via trees...* BZZZAAAARRKK!!!

ooog... ok, who electrified the trees?

Wolfie! Congratulations!! I didn't even know you were seeing anyone. Color me clueless! Welcome to the ranks of the affianced! (ooh, doesn't that sound fancy?)

[wolfie]

Zoodle!!! There you are. I've been wondering how you were doing. *grins*

[Joshkr]

Wolfie!!! *HUGS*

Congratulations!!!!!

You bitch, you never told me :)

[wolfie]

Sorry Weasel. That was to keep the attack squirrels out.

Thanks Josh. But don't call me a bitch unless we are having role play phone sex :-P
Again.
*gives Josh an atomic wedgie*

*runs*

[Deon]

All caught up. Thoughts:

Sly: Kudos on your stalker work on bella. I am humbled by my oversight. And very funny italic closing. I hope you didn’t strain anything.

Kibby: Sister bit by a moose? Clearly some kind of story waiting to be told there! How are you anyway? And pant legs are supposed to be the same length? I always feel like I’m making a fashion accomplishment if my pants are long enough to cover both of my socks.

Lt Woman: *snork* Everclear.

DDi: I may not be the brightest crayon in the box, but hot diggity, I'm neon pink compared to this person. After laughing, I wonder: do you get paid by the hour/salary? Or does the decline in your productivity cost you personally? Theoretically the bossman should care.

Wolfie (celebrity of the week): What? no college?! but, but . . . it was all going to work. Hmmm. Well, keep it on your "to-do" list, okay?

OK. Back to work for me (you too Neo! Yes, I detect you blurking there! Shoo!)

Anyone smell burnt hair?

[Joshkr]

Wolfie...beware your next text message ;)

[wolfie]

You need to be more creative than that Josh. Remember I am the one who managed to corrupt her cell phone.
*grins*

*waits*

[insomniac]

congratulations, Wolfie!

[Brian B]

Wow. I mean, just...wow. Girl, you can really hold a secret! Congrats to you both!

I see a HUGE MOATie engagement party in the future. It just so happens that Cincinnati would be a GREAT place for it since Mad and Mike are in Cali and the soon-to-be Mr. and Mrs. Wolfie are in New York!

Also, I'm calling this the HummerMOAT.

[wolfie]

Thanks everyone
*curtsies*

Leave it to a guy to turn the attacksquirell Moat into a hummer.
Does that mean I just gave everyone a hummer?
*is proud*

[Tamara]

Deon said: "Sister bit by a moose? Clearly some kind of story waiting to be told there!"

Deon, your lack of Python knowledge is showing! (Ewwww.) *averts eyes*

[Jeff Meyerson]

Wow, proposing in front of your family - gutsy move. I guess he must have been sure of the answer by them.

I love "Mr. Wolfie" too. And I'm sure you both will be as happy as Mad & Weasel, Wolfie. All the best to both of you guys. It's really great news.

[wolfie]

Like I'd turn down a dozen diamonds? I'm a mercenary wolfie ya know.
Better in front of mine than his. Since one of the first conversations his mother and I had was when she informed me that she hoped I wasn't having premarital sex with her son. To which I responded in my subtle kind way that as long as she didn't find us humping on her dining room table, it really was none of her business. And I wonder why she doesn't like me.

Now on to the important part of my announcement that everyone forgot... Do I need to make anything to go with the turkey I'm being forced to make tonight? Or will meat suffice since this whole dinner thing wasn't my idea and I don't know how to cook. Meat and wine. I don't even like turkey. Cept in sammich form.

[Susan]

For dinner, a side dish or two might be good. Mashed potatoes and maybe gravy...green beans...since it's not Thanksgiving you can probably skip the cranberry sauce...rolls or something of that sort...

[wolfie]

Oh sure. Skip the one thing I can create simply by opening a can.
*sighs*

[Trillian]

Is there a Boston Market near you? you could pick up some side dishes there.

[wolfie]

OOoooo.. excellent thought. There isn't real nearby, but once I toss the turkey in, I can zip (I'mma need to borrow your zip please and ty El) out and grab some stuff. Sweet idea. Thanks Trillian *lick*

[Brian B]

At your local grocery store, they probably have Bob Evans side dishes in or near the meat coolers. I normally despise pre-prepared, pre-cooked food items. However, I must admit that the Bob Evans' mashed potatoes are pretty tasty.

I didn't even see that the post was about squirrels. I saw the Ho-Hum headline and went with it.

[BigD®]

Also the frozen Boston Market stuff in the grocery store ain't that bad and all you have to do is nuke it.

[bangi]

Why, congratulations my dear!
cheers!

Okay, that was for Deon...this is for Wolfie

CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
HUGS HUGS HUGS

BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
okay, who tied my tarzan ropes to high voltage trees?

[Lt. Woman]

Firstly... Congratulations to the soon to be Mr & Mrs Wolfie. Long life and happiness to you both and as many little wolfie pups as you wish to bless your lives..
Also, when you were still calling him Flavour of the month (oh.. about three posts back.. you sneak!), you mentioned diamonds. I made a note.. with FOTMs, it's not the distance the relationship lasts, it's the size of an FOTM's wallet. Getting engaged works well, too, though! Also.. in front of your family!! Aaawwwwwwwwww.....

Secondly.. I remembered what I was trying to remember last night!! There's a new ad on TV for the Canteen "bandana" campaign (selling bandanas to raise funds for Canteen - the teens with cancer group). It's the Muppet "manamana song"! Modified to "Bandanana" naturally.. but still really funny!

Brian B.. congrats to you and P on the anniversary!! Have an amazing night out and .. oh.. another 50, 60, 70 or so happy years together! BTW.. I know you'll be happy about this .. I saw that "My Name Is Earl" has been picked up for a full season..

Great news in the fight against cancer!! Visit my blog.. it's in the update section on the breast cancer month post. (Link to blog on my name..)

Di.. if Stoopud Guy is a wet noodle, you can choke him by wrapping his legs around his neck and tying a BIG TIGHT knot. Problem solved. Wear gloves and a hat so you don't leave hair or print evidence.

Tamara.. Good news on the gay Catholic priest front.. I still want to know how they plan to prove it, but that's another day, another question..

I'm moving over to Ma & Pa's for 5 days to housesit the poodles from Hell. And one adorable cat (Maggie.. I call her Fluffybutt because that's exactly what she is!) Wish me luck. I should still be able to blog from there, but I'll be popping home most days for email checks and so on..

Hasta bandanas, Moaties!

[wolfie]

*adjusts voltage on trees so they just give a pleasant zing*

Sorry. It was to keep the attack squirrels out, but since this is the HummerMoat, we can use then (slightly adjusted) for other purposes. *grins*

Thanks bangi *hugz*

And thanks everyone for the ideas. Now I'm feeling better about this. I just need the maid to come and clean up the house. Arghhhhh.
*runs home*

[bangi]

Wolfie! Order out! set em on plates!
*whispers*
nobody will know ;)

[bangi]

no need to adjust the voltage wolfie, the trees have been earthed.
HA!
get it...trees...earthed!
*slaps knee*

ok...i'll go now.
gnite moaties.

[Deon]

BANGI!

Good to see you--even if only briefly.

[Susan]

Bangi! Hi!!!

Ok, I am bouncing off the walls at this point. People have been in and out of this place all day long. Most of them I even recognized. (ok, there were one or two I was a little vague on connecting the name with the person, but I knew them all as soon as they said the name...)

Not a quiet day here by any means.

Wooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!

*calming down a little now*

[Lt. Woman]

*loves Susan a couple of indrustrial-sized xa nax*
N.B. Picture represents actual size. (also take space out of link so that it's comment spam again.. )

No i'm not really here, it's just that the bus doesn't leave for another 15 mins and I was bored. Looks like Dave was a little bored too.. several posts on the MB to play with..

[Lt. Woman]

ugh.. comment spam killed my linkage. Or leaked it everywhere. Or something.

[Eleanor]

wolfie - I go to Boston Market a lot. Their green beans are very good as is their squash and mashed potatoes and they even have stuffing and gravy! Great idea, Trillian! and wolfie, you may certainly use my *zip* for any special occasion!

[BigD®]

chirp

chirp

chirp

[Bismuth]

Hooray for Wolfie!

AAAAAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooowll!

wtg!

[Trillian]

if you search for Trillian on msn, my blog comes up 8th out of 900,000

[Higgy]

WOLFIE!!! Way to go, babe! Congrats to you and Mr Wolfie! Excellent news! Now all we have to do is get you over that commitment-phobe hump and you're laughing! Very happy for you!

[Lt. Woman]

*comes in wearing hob-nailed boots*

*STOMP*
*SQUISH*
*DESTROY*
*ANNIHILATE*

I ate, consumed and am currently digesting a thesaurus

[Lt. Woman]

getting over a hump is not a problem I've ever known our wolfie to have

[Peri]

rita and Tom, Mad and Mike, wolfie and her alphamale...love is in the air! I think Punky said it best - I'm so happy I could pee. I could but I think I'll just have beer and make a toast, instead.

Happiness and success to everyone who has found love - and to those still searching.

[slyeyes]

*kicks over a rock*

Not there.

*looks in hole under the rock*

Not there, either.

*sigh* The search continues

[Susan]

Peri, have one (or several) for me. The usual Friday football madness has been multiplied by equipment difficulties...and classmates coming by all day long to get t-shirts.

Count me in the still searching for love...not that I'm searching at this moment.

I'll just hug and grope and so on for now...

And have an adult beverage (or two) after the game...

[Peri]

For cryin' out loud, sly! Quit looking under rocks! The guys you find there are really icky. I'm not saying that the men at the country club don't often turn out be icky also but at least they don't have visible slime on them.

[Peri]

Cheers, Susan!

I got a new exercise thingy - an elliptical rider. OMG! I can walk and bike for miles but this thing is like running and cross country skiing at the same time and is either going to make me as thin as a twig or kill me. I thought the muscles in my legs were in pretty good shape these days but apparently there's lots more in there that I never knew about.

[slyeyes]

*opens closet*

LOTS of guys in there.

[slyeyes]

....all trying on my shoes......

[Peri]

Is it just a fact of the universe that if you take your car to the garage for something very specific (say an oil, filter and lube and 2 new tires) that the garage man will call you within the hour and tell you that he found something hideously and life-threateningly wrong with your brakes?

[Peri]

That's another fact of the universe, slyeyes. Maybe the most tragic of them all.

[Eleanor]

Yes Peri, that is a rule. It must happen or how would garage man make his house payment?? And he might have a boat, too, especially here in su.so.ca.!

sly, you can say that again...*double sigh*

[slyeyes]

I found out something VERY interesting about brakes the other day. Specifically, the light on the dashboard telling you the emergency brake is on.

It actually serves TWO functions. It not only tells you the emergency brake is on; it also tells you that your regular brakes are so crappy they have worn down purt'near through the rotors and you are going to need to put your foot out and drag it to stop. I never knew that.

When I pull out of the garage, I'm on a steep hill and I set the emergency brake to close the garage door (until I get a garage door opener later this month). One morning, several months ago, I released the emergency brake, but the light stayed on and blinked. I thought it was some sort of anomoly, a short or something with the light itself.

Sadly, no. It was telling me "LADY!! YOUR BRAKES ARE CRAP. GET THEM FIXED NOW!. I did last weekend.

I thought they were supposed to squeal to let you know they were in need of being replaced. They never did.

*note to self; you might consider getting your hearing checked. I SAID, YOU MIGHT CONSIDER GETTING YOUR HEARING CHECKED!!!*

*goes to search for love behind shrubbery in the front yard*

[Susan]

Peri, they learn that in mechanic school.

I'll be here...for the game, sort of. Not sure how much posting I can do...but I'll be here in spirit anyway.

No pants night?

[Peri]

...it also tells you that your regular brakes are so crappy they have worn down purt'near through the rotors and you are going to need to put your foot out and drag it to stop. I never knew that.

sly, that's exactly how it was!!! I went back to the garage and made him show me. It was ugly. It was also expensive. *sigh* Good thing all my travel plans had been previously cancelled.

Susan, I do have pants on because winter fell on us with a gruesome snowstorm the other day and it's freezing here! And after my waxing last weekend I don't have any natural protective covering left. So flannel jammies it is. But they're very roomy - lots of room for a mad scientist, some furry paws, sexy DJs, lawyers...let's have a party in my pants!

[Deon admires Gromit]

Oh, and wolfie? is Wallace & Gromit good?

[Deon]

Hi Peri. Jeez you are hilarious lately.

[Peri]

Hey! I KNOW I closed those!

[Susan]

Wooo! Party in Peri's pants!

Ok...I'll behave.

For now.

This has been a wild day...and it's not over yet.

[Peri]

Oh, it was just the fly on these jammies that was open. I'm outta practice working pants.

*offers to shake hands with Deon*

*gropes his bum when he falls for it*

[Lt. Woman]

oops... did I bring in the blog-killing vi rus again? I hate it when I do that

[Eleanor]

*zips in*

*sees sly looking for love in shrubbery*

Hey sly, any Random Guys in there?

Yankee game is on in 5 minutes - OK 10 minutes, or maybe 20 minutes...

*zips over to MB to kill some time*

[Peri]

All that silence was just the pants party concentrating on the job at hand (ha!) and building to a fever pitch - resulting in: A SIMULPOST! WOOT!

Good job, guys!

Hee hee! I said 'job'.

[Susan]

I'm out for now...game ready to start. Recording on this computer means I don't really dare try to post here...the recording slows it down.

Back at the half...

[Lt. Woman]

sorry.. parents stoopud fricking computer. Every single time you post you have to cut and kibby, check if your posts there, then kibby again if it's not, check again. This time I could see nothing since my last post, despite it being over an hour ago..

Head over to my blog.. there's some random guys on the brains and brawn thread.

[Mike "Mad's Dork" Weasel]

*wipes off visible slime and heads home*

Nite all! Have a great weekend!