Dave Barry's Blog

IN THAT CASE, SIR...

Florida Man Arrested For Going 100 MPH, Claims He Needed To Go To Taco Bell

(Thanks to Ralph)

DEPARTMENT OF EMAILS TO THE BLOG THAT WE DID NOT FINISH READING

Hello, I’m working on a mental health and wellness campaign

'SO HOW WAS YOUR COMMUTE?'

Dramatic moment Kia Soul is launched 10 feet into the air after a loose wheel plows into it on LA freeway

(Thanks to Al Barkafski, who says "Kia Soul is the first flying car!")

FINALLY

MR ROGERS’ ‘WON’T YOU BE MY NEIGHBOR?’ TO THE TUNE OF ‘HOUSE OF THE RISING SUN’

(Thanks to Peter Metrinko)

FOR POSTERITY, DUDE

This Bay Area startup is preserving the world’s best pot strains

(Thanks to Doug Ogg)

HOW HEAVY IS THAT IN ARMADILLOS?

A 1,500 pound great white shark named ‘Breton’ is currently swimming off the coast of North Carolina

(Thanks to Jay Brandes and B&C, who asks "How do they know his name is Breton?")

'GAINING ACADEMIC CREDIBILITY' IS THE NEW WAY TO SAY 'STUPID'

The Idea That Everything From Spoons to Stones is Conscious is Gaining Academic Credibility

(Thanks to Robert Moats)

ASTEROID MEASUREMENT-UNIT UPDATE

Asteroid the size of 33 armadillos to pass Earth Sunday - NASA

(Thanks to Asher Scheiner and Mary Smith)

WHAT IF WE JUST WANT TO PEE?

As part of ‘The Tokyo Toilet‘ initiative, Sou Fujimoto has completed the design of a new restroom on the shopping street of Nishisando, Japan. Taking shape as a giant washbasin amid the busy neighborhood, its curvaceous silhouette stands out discreetly against the large buildings on the backdrop. The design team sought to form a ‘vessel open for everyone’ with a recessed center that can host people of all ages,‘ becoming part of our lives’.

Related: Finnish Company Debuts 'World's First' Flushable Wooden Toilet

(Thanks to Asher Scheiner)

WE WERE PROMISED FLYING CARS

You can now 'experience death' in virtual reality with disturbing new simulation

(Thanks to Asher Scheiner, who says "Exhibit does not include Elvis at the end of the tunnel.")

IF IT'S THE SQUIRRELS, WE'RE NOT SURE WHO WE'RE ROOTING FOR

Black widows are vanishing. Here's their new enemy.

(Thanks to Rod Nunley)

THE EPIDEMIC IS SPREADING

Nightmare As Child Lifts Toilet Seat Lid To Find 5ft Python

Enormous Python Found Emerging from Toilet That Wouldn't Flush

(Thanks to Asher Scheiner)

WE HAVE LOST OUR MINDS, AS A SPECIES

Since February, the city has begun to unveil the concrete squirrel sculptures as part of the Seguin Squirrel Trail Program. Each sponsored squirrel is painted by a local artist and then permanently mounted somewhere throughout the community.

(Thanks to Asher Scheiner)

DEPARTMENT OF EMAILS TO THE BLOG THAT WE DID NOT FINISH READING

Hello admin,

I have found your website from a google search and visited.

IT WAS THE ONLY RATIONAL RESPONSE

Taco Bell customer damages drive-thru, threatens to shoot employees when told he can't order breakfast burrito

(Thanks to Ralph)

BUT STILL ON THE CLOCK

Firefighters discover ‘missing’ plumber asleep in crawl space under California home

(Thanks to Robert Moats)

THEY'RE WEARING DISGUISES, YOU FOOL

I Can't Believe How Different Squirrels Look In Other Countries

(Thanks to Robert Moats)

WE ASSUME IT WILL FAIL

NYC’s Museum of Failure opens to make us feel better about our lives

(Thanks to Al Barkafski)

APPARENTLY THESE RESEARCHERS HAVE NEVER RIDDEN THE NEW YORK CITY SUBWAY

Apparently, sniffing the sweat of another person could be a useful way to give your mental health a boost, says a team of Swedish researchers

(Thanks to Matt Filar)

WHICH CAN ALSO BE DEADLY

Bomb-sniffing dog leads handlers to explosive outside the NYSE — which turned out to be rat poop

(Thanks to EricY and John Lobert)