Dave Barry's Blog

DEPARTMENT OF EMAILS WE DID NOT FINISH READING

Hi Name,

We saw your book, "Book," on Amazon and think it deserves even more attention!

BOTH THE MAN AND THE CAMEL WERE RELEASED AFTER ETC.

In an unusual and dangerous incident, a visibly inebriated man was seen riding a camel on the PV Narsimha Rao Expressway in Hyderabad, terrifying motorists.

(Thanks to pharmaross)

APOCALYPSE UPDATE

Poisonous hammerhead worms rising in Texas. When chopped in two, they double

(Thanks to Barry Nester)

IT PRODUCED A VALID ETC.

At Virginia motel, an odd guest checks in: A six-foot alligator

(Thanks to Gary Shcroeder)

WE MIGHT AS WELL SHRED THE SO-CALLED 'BILL OF RIGHTS'

No-nonsense Texas judge scolds man for wearing ‘World’s Best Farter’ shirt in courtroom

(Thanks to Michael Parry)

WHAT *CAN'T* HE DO?

Jack Bauer, who has thrown 102 mph pitch, flips from Virginia to Mississippi State baseball

(Thanks to  [of course] The Amazing Steve, who says "p.s. Edgar is still dead.') 

IT WAS THE MOST DIRECT ROUTE TO FLORIDA

An 80-year-old drives a luxury Mercedes sedan down Rome’s Spanish Steps and gets stuck

(Thanks to John Lobert)

LEAVING HIM WITH NO CHOICE

Pasco man starts roadway gunfight because victims were ‘2 big guys’ in a ‘bigger truck’: affidavit

(Thanks to pharmaross)

WE THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME

Liquid Death Is Selling Empty Iced Tea Cans Containing Ozzy Osbourne’s DNA

(Thanks to Ralph)

SEND SOME TO WASHINGTON

Mouth tape has become a billion-dollar industry.

(Thanks to Fred Preller)

ALWAYS THE LAST ETC.

Astronomers locate universe's 'missing' matter

(Thanks to Steve K, who says "It was in the unclaimed luggage at O'Hare Airport.")

FRANCE ON HIGH ALERT

Southern Europeans protest overtourism with water pistols

(Thanks to Steve Pudlo)

THEY HAVE AN ASSOCIATION?

Ghana: Reduce alcohol prices or we’ll shut down everywhere — Drunkards association warns govt

(Thanks to Ralph)

'WELCOME ABOARD FLIGHT BITEME1'

United Airlines Passengers Shocked By Lewd Message That Greeted Them On Every Inflight Video Screen On Plane

(Thanks to pharmaross)

COLDPLAY?

Unexplained radio signals coming from Antarctic ice

(Thanks to Asher Scheiner)

GO GRANNY GO

Reckless pensioners have been hit with a 4mph speed limit to stop them terrorising shoppers on their mobility scooters.

(Thanks to Allen at Division)

YOU NEVER FORGET YOUR FIRST

Largo police officer goes viral for hilarious reaction to his first alligator encounter

(Thanks to pharmaross and Rick Day)

EVER WONDER WHAT THEY PUT IN SAUSAGE?

You don't want to know.

(Thanks to John Lobert)

EW

Kings Island visitors warned to keep mouths closed on amusement park rides because of cicadas

(Thanks to Ralph)

AND IN BASEBALL

...the infielder was actually seen wearing a pair of fake testicles as he jumped up and down.

(Thanks to pharmaross)