Dave Barry's Blog

THIS WAS IN FLORIDA, SO HIS STORY CHECKS OUT

Drug Suspect Claimed Bag Of Syringes Was "For Fishing," Police Report

(Thanks to pharmaross)

IT WAS A FAKE DINOSAUR, OF COURSE, BUT IT HAD A REAL FLORIDA DRIVER'S LICENSE

T-Rex stuns drivers on Interstate 4

(Thanks to pharmaross)

THE HAZARDS OF BRONCO BUSTING

Unfortunately our strict policy prohibits us from reporting on the hazards of bronco busting.

(Thanks to pharmaross)

EMAILS THIS BLOG NEVER FINISHED READING

Hi, This would be the last time I contact.

WHAT’S THAT SMELL?

TV Weatherman Appears To Fart On Air

(Thanks to pharmaross, who says “Sounds like a partially occluded front is passing through the area.”) 

THESE ARE MESSAGES CONCERNING YOUR CAR WARRANTY

Unknown space object beaming out radio signals every 18 minutes remains a mystery

(Thanks to B&C)

MAKES SENSE

New scientific paper claims octopuses are actually aliens from outer space

(Thanks to Barry Nester)

MOON THE MOON

The moon appears larger when it’s near the horizon, but you can defeat this illusion by bending over and viewing it between your legs.

(Thanks to Peter Metrinko)

DO NOT MESS WITH THEM

Lion loses a TESTICLE after lionesses attack him for trying to steal their food

(Thanks to pharmaross)

JUSTICE BREYER IS RETIRING

This blog enjoyed serving as his mentor.

YIKES

Seriously, yikes.

(Thanks to John Lobert, who says “there had to be vodka involved.”)

WHAT’S THAT SMELL?

Hippos unleash poop tornado in response to stranger danger

(Thanks to Ralph)

UH OH

Woman who helped monkeys in Pennsylvania crash experiencing health issues: report

(Thanks to pharmaross)

THIS IS WHY WE HAVE THE DEATH PENALTY

Alabama man accused of keeping meth-fed ‘attack squirrel’ faces new charges

(Thanks to Rick Day)

THE NEWS FROM EUROPE

Unfortunately our strict policy prohibits us from presenting The News From Europe.

(Thanks to Peter Metrinko)

NO WORD ON HOW THEY FEEL ABOUT BARRY MANILOW

Aliens love the Queen but not Prince Harry or Prince Andrew, UFO expert claims

(Thanks to Jim Kenaston)

IN SLOVAKIA, ANYWAY

Flying car wins airworthiness certification

Longer story here.

(Thanks to Gerry Studzinski and Michael Moyer)

SAID BY WHOM?

Japanese lingerie manufacturer Wacoal recently launched a line of lace boxer briefs for men that are said to be both beautiful and functional.

(Thanks to Static Joeage)

TWO GLASSES, PLUS A BOOSTER GLASS

Drinking red wine can reduce risk of catching Covid, according to new research

(Thanks to Barry Nester)

CSI: BLEACHFIELD

At some point in the preceding hours Mr Ross had male genitals drawn on his face which enabled police to quickly track him down from a description of the culprits.

(Thanks to Unholy Slacker)