Dave Barry's Blog

WHOEVER WINS THIS ELECTION HAD DAMN WELL BETTER HAVE A PLAN FOR DEALING WITH FLATHEAD COUNTY

7:06 a.m. Mules were seen running through the fog on La Brandt Lane in Bigfork. (Thanks to Jeff Meyerson) Non-funny update:We kid Flathead County because we love Flathead County, especially these folks. Stay safe over there. (Thanks to L

FLATHEAD COUNTY UPDATE

10:01 a.m.A woman called from Helsinki to report a theft that occurred three years ago, when she was in Flathead County. This has been your Flathead County update for today. (Thanks to Stan Ruth)

YOUR FLATHEAD COUNTY UPDATE OF THE DAY

1:07 p.m. A suspicious person was seen photographing the Flathead Beacon offices. (Thanks to Corey, who is currently in South Dakota for some reason.)

FLATHEAD COUNTY: WHERE WEIRD IS NORMAL

7:57 p.m. A man on Flathead Drive complained that his weird roommates boarded up the living room. (Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)

MEANWHILE IN FLATHEAD COUNTY

Unfortunately, our strict policy prohibits us from from telling you what is going on in Flathead County. (Thanks to ligirl)

FLATHEAD: THE COUNTY THAT KEEPS ON GIVING

Authorities began receiving reports of an individual posing as a U.S. Coast Guard officer and riding around Flathead Lake on a Jet Ski over the last month. (Thanks to Not My Usual Alias)

STAND TALL, FLATHEAD COUNTY

Flathead County leading state in roadkill permits (Thanks to J.R. Absher)