January 25, 2021

WHAT’S THAT SMELL?

Man who farted in Uber ends up in court

(Thanks to Unholy Slacker)

Posted by Dave on January 25, 2021 at 01:25 PM
Permalink | Comments (12)

NOW YOU'RE TALKING

Russian cross-country skier DQed after whipping opponent with ski pole, tackling

(Thanks to Allen at Division)

Posted by Dave on January 25, 2021 at 01:23 PM
Permalink | Comments (11)

WE'RE GONNA NEED MORE ENGLISH MUFFINS

18-wheeler carrying load of honeybees flips, causes road closure near downtown

(Thanks to pharmaross)

Posted by Dave on January 25, 2021 at 11:20 AM
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ONLY BECAUSE IRELAND WAS TOO HUNG OVER TO PARTICIPATE

England and Scotland top global league table for getting drunk most often

(Thanks to pharmaross)

Posted by Dave on January 25, 2021 at 11:17 AM
Permalink | Comments (8)

YOU WILL NEVER GUESS WHERE

...she found her car plastered with signs, but they weren’t parking tickets. Instead, a stranger was trying to warn her that there was a 2 metre long snake curled up in her engine.

(Thanks to Asher Scheiner)

Posted by Dave on January 25, 2021 at 11:12 AM
Permalink | Comments (9)

BACK THEN THEY WERE MADE OF BAMBOO

120-year-old condom found in Japan

(Thanks to Ralph and Alberto)

Posted by Dave on January 25, 2021 at 11:05 AM
Permalink | Comments (7)

WHO SAYS ROMANCE IS DEAD?

A 20-year-old man accused of stealing property from hotel guests took pairs of women’s underwear and left a note with his phone number, police documents said.

(Thanks to Jane Linderman)

Posted by Dave on January 25, 2021 at 08:26 AM
Permalink | Comments (26)

January 24, 2021

SPORTS NEWS FROM DOWN UNDER

‘Abnormally Large Testicles’ Lead To Sale Of Australian Racehorse

(Thanks to pharmaross)

Posted by Dave on January 24, 2021 at 02:57 PM
Permalink | Comments (12)

THIS JUST IN

Giant snow penis appears in Swedish town

(Thanks to pharmaross)

Posted by Dave on January 24, 2021 at 12:23 PM
Permalink | Comments (11)

THIS IS EXACTLY WHY WE HAVE POLICE

Woman calls police after arriving too late for McDonald’s drive-thru breakfast

(Thanks to AmoebaStampede)

Posted by Dave on January 24, 2021 at 12:20 PM
Permalink | Comments (9)

WE HOPE THEY KNOW WHO THEY’RE MESSING WITH

Navy to continue bombing in Florida

(Thanks to pharmaross)

Posted by Dave on January 24, 2021 at 12:05 PM
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CSI: KENNESAW, GA.

"After a quick investigation, we located the turkey that was holding up traffic…..literally a turkey."

Needless to say it produced a valid Florida driver’s license.

(Thanks to Ralph) 

Journalism Question: Is there some rule requiring that EVERY news story involving a bird MUST include some play on the words “foul” and “fowl?” 

Posted by Dave on January 24, 2021 at 12:03 PM
Permalink | Comments (14)

IT BIT THE MOTOR

Boat captain pets great white shark off Pinellas coast

(Thanks to Ralph and pharmaross)

Posted by Dave on January 24, 2021 at 11:58 AM
Permalink | Comments (6)

January 23, 2021

AMERICA DEMANDS AN ANSWER

Do Testicles Have Taste Buds?

(Thanks to Unholy Slacker)

Posted by Dave on January 23, 2021 at 03:56 PM
Permalink | Comments (13)

NOW THIS IS WHAT WE CALL INITIATIVE

Gwinnett County Police Detectives arrested a 19-year-old man after he scammed over $980,000 from Kroger.

In two weeks.

(Thanks to Dave N, who says “In the old days we’d just shove steaks into our pants and walk out.”)

Posted by Dave on January 23, 2021 at 03:50 PM
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TWIT

Prince Charles is celebrating Red Squirrel Appreciation Day!

"As you will all know so well, these charming and intelligent creatures never fail to delight," Charles, 72, wrote. "I take enormous pleasure in having them around – and in! – the house when I am at home in Scotland.

(Thanks to B’game)

Somebody needs to tell the prince: Toronto woman finds knife-wielding squirrel in back yard

(Thanks to Doc Occ)

Posted by Dave on January 23, 2021 at 09:12 AM
Permalink | Comments (14)

January 22, 2021

'AUTO BREWERY SYNDROME'

Man gets drunk WITHOUT boozing as bizarre condition turns cake into alcohol inside his stomach

(Thanks to Doug Ogg)

Posted by Dave on January 22, 2021 at 10:42 AM
Permalink | Comments (19)

TO BOLDLY GO

Haggis launched to the edge of space in celebration of Burns Night

(Thanks to Jay Brandes, who says "not far enough.")

Posted by Dave on January 22, 2021 at 10:37 AM
Permalink | Comments (15)

IS THERE A PROBLEM, OFFICER?

Naked man driving stolen JSO cruiser crashes into woods on I-10

Huh: The man... appeared to be in a distressed mental state

(Thanks to pharmaross, who notes that the "distressed mental state" is Florida)

Posted by Dave on January 22, 2021 at 10:34 AM
Permalink | Comments (7)

AS RESIDENTS OF THIS CITY, WE ARE AMUSED

Elon Musk: Dig tunnels as solution for traffic jams in this Florida city

(Thanks to pharmaross and Woozy Barnes)

Posted by Dave on January 22, 2021 at 10:29 AM
Permalink | Comments (17)

 
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