Dave Barry's Blog

SPECIFICALLY, THE TWILIGHT ZONE

Scientist says human consciousness comes from another dimension

(Thanks to Doug Ogg)

CANADA: A NATION IN CHAOS

The Royal Canadian Mounted Police has lost 205 firearms since 2020, including machine-guns

Elusive salamanders make surprising mass appearance in Edmonton area

(Thanks to The Perts)

IT WAS THE MOST DIRECT ROUTE TO FLORIDA

C8 Corvette Driven Into The Caribbean Sea

(Thanks to EricY)

GUYS IN FINANCIAL ACTION

He bought a cruise ship on Craigslist and spent over US$1 million restoring it. Then his dream sank

(Thanks to The Perts)

YOU STOMP IT. WE'RE GONNA FLEE.

Huge flying SPIDERS are spotted in Northeast for first time - with anyone who sees one urged to stomp it to death

(Thanks to Emily, Leslie and w)

IT'S ESCALATING

Train ride cancelled due to attacking squirrels

(Thanks to B'game and John Lobert)

IF THE CUBICLE'S ROCKIN', DON'T COME KNOCKIN'

Russia is encouraging millions to have sex at work to address rapidly tumbling birthrate

(Thanks to Jim Perth)

HECKUVA JOB, FEMA

The Federal Emergency Management Agency accidentally sent out a release declaring a "major disaster" for the state of Texas following the New Orleans Saints' victory over the Dallas Cowboys.

(Thanks to Ralph)

AFRAID OF SNAKES?

Don't click here.

(Thanks to EricY, Dave Vander Ark and B&C, who say "We are never going to do dishes in Thailand.")

THAT WOULD EXPLAIN THE BARKING

Zoogoers in China have been left outraged after discovering that the so-called “pandas” they were cooing over were just painted dogs.

(Thanks to pharmaross, Barry Nester and Roberto)

JUST ANOTHER DAY DOWN UNDER

Wild moment crocodile 'battles' sharks in front of stunned beachgoer at North Queensland

(Thanks to Rod Nunley)

FLARRRRRRRRRRIDA

For the second time in two years, a Florida Woman has been arrested for a dildo-related domestic battery.

(Thanks to Carlos Montage)

IMAGINE THE SNEEZES, ME HEARTIES

Hay fever may have led to extinction of woolly mammoths

(Thanks to Emily, Leslie and w)

ONLY KEITH RICHARRRRRRDS CAN SETTLE THIS, ME HEARTIES

Scientist Disputes That Big Bang Actually Happened

(Thanks to Robert Moats)

TIME FOR SCHOOLIN', ME HEARTIES

Pirate Lingo 101

(Thanks to Jeff Meyarrrrrson)

WE BE DISTRAUGHT

Tupperware, iconic food container brand, files for bankruptcy

(Thanks to Jim Kenaston, Steve K. and MOTW, who says "Time for a benefit concert with RBR so Dave can sing The Tupperware Song!")

AND IN SPARRRRRRRTS

Florida Python Challenge winner awarded $10K grand prize for killing 20 Burmese pythons

(Thanks to pharrrrrrrrmaross and The Parrrrrrrrts)

THAT BE RIGHT NEIGHBARRRRRRRLY

California man accidentally pays neighbor's power bill for years

(Thanks to Long John Lobert)

IT ALWAYS BE THE LAST PLACE YOU LOOK, MATEY

California woman finds marmot hiding in her engine

(Thanks to John Lobarrrrrt)

NEED A PIRATE NAME, ME HEARTY?

Here be a Pirate Name Generatarrrrrrr.