July 26, 2021

ALWAYS CONSULT THE TIDE TABLES BEFORE DRIVING AT NIGHT

Tesla's Full Self-Driving Feature Mistakes Moon For Yellow Traffic Light

(Thanks to Rod Nunley, who says "This is probably a good thing.")

Posted by Dave on July 26, 2021 at 06:15 PM
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DO NOT MESS WITH MOM

Mother makes roadblock to force drivers to stop at her children's lemonade stand

(Thanks to John Lobert)

Posted by Dave on July 26, 2021 at 06:12 PM
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THIS WILL ACTUALLY IMPROVE THE OVERALL BQE EXPERIENCE

The BQE Is Covered In Peppers Following Major Crash

(Thanks to Ashe Scheiner)

Posted by Dave on July 26, 2021 at 10:33 AM
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THAT SHOULD BE ENOUGH TO CONVICT HIM

Michelangelo's fingerprint possibly found on butt of wax statue

(Thanks to Peter Metrinko)

Posted by Dave on July 26, 2021 at 10:31 AM
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‘CHASE YOUR DREAMS’

The Flagler County Sheriff's Office said a strange vessel washed ashore on Saturday morning. It turned out to be a Central Florida man who was ‘walking on water’ for charity. 

(Thanks to Dave N.)

Posted by Dave on July 26, 2021 at 08:55 AM
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July 25, 2021

'DON'T MESS WITH US'

A group of Gisborne "hero nannies" sprang into action, wielding chairs, handbags and kicking over tables, to fight off two wannabe thieves who tried to rob them of $700 during their bingo night.

(Thanks to John Lobert)

Posted by Dave on July 25, 2021 at 10:28 AM
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HENCE THE NAME

In-flight lightning strike grounds 2 F-35B Lightning II jets

(Thanks to Peter Metrinko)

Posted by Dave on July 25, 2021 at 10:26 AM
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FRANCE ON HIGH ALERT

Couple's anniversary dinner interrupted when nudist cruise pulls up beside them

(Thanks to pharmaross and John Lobert)

Note that this blog is not making note of the name of the male member (Hah!) of the couple.

Posted by Dave on July 25, 2021 at 10:20 AM
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'I DON'T KNOW IF HE WAS PRETENDING TO BE A BADASS OR SOMETHING'

O'Riley's Uptown Tavern customer accidentally shoots himself while showing off gun

Guess the state.

(Thanks to pharmaross and John Lobert)

Posted by Dave on July 25, 2021 at 10:14 AM
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SOMEBODY'S GONNA LOSE HIS SMARTPHONE PRIVILEGES

14-Year-Old Forced to Do House Chores Reports His Father to Police for “Illegal Child Labor”

(Thanks to pharmaross)

Posted by Dave on July 25, 2021 at 10:11 AM
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THE SCIENCE IS SETTLED

Ministers have privately pointed to evidence that Covid could be spread by people breaking wind in confined spaces such as lavatories.

(Thanks to Barry Nester)

Posted by Dave on July 25, 2021 at 10:06 AM
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WHO SAYS NEBRASKA ISN'T EXCITING?

Not this blog.

(Thanks to Le Petomane, who says "There will be some sore winners.")

Posted by Dave on July 25, 2021 at 10:02 AM
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July 24, 2021

PROBABLY NOT WHAT THEY HAD IN MIND WHEN THEY DECIDED TO BECOME FIREFIGHTERS

Fire crews called to Huddersfield Royal Infirmary to cut metal ring off man's penis

(Thanks to pharmaross)

Posted by Dave on July 24, 2021 at 11:43 AM
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WHAT'S THAT SMELL?

California man busted in stolen porta-potty truck

(Thanks to Ralph)

Posted by Dave on July 24, 2021 at 11:37 AM
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MEANWHILE IN FLATHEAD COUNTY

6:19 p.m. Someone’s dog threw up.

(Thanks to pharmaross and Mary Smith)

Posted by Dave on July 24, 2021 at 11:34 AM
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IS THAT BAD?

Woman Completely Filled Her Car's Engine With Water

Advisory: Certain words.

(Thanks to John Lobert)

Posted by Dave on July 24, 2021 at 10:22 AM
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TRAVELING TO VIETNAM?

Keep an eye on the kids,

(Thanks to John Lobert)

Posted by Dave on July 24, 2021 at 10:15 AM
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SOON TO BE A MAJOR MOTION PICTURE

How Trying to Secretly Fart Landed Me In The Hospital

Posted by Dave on July 24, 2021 at 10:06 AM
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THIS BLOG’S BRAIN MUST BE THE SIZE OF A PRUNE PIT

Too much coffee can cause your brain to shrink

(Thanks to Le Petomane, who says “Yet another study says beer will increase your intelligence, which we know to be true: Who doesn't feel smarter after a few beers?”)

Posted by Dave on July 24, 2021 at 10:02 AM
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July 23, 2021

THEY WERE RELEASED AFTER PRODUCING GIANT, BUT VALID, FLORIDA DRIVERS' LICENSES

US border agents seize 15 giant snails

(Thanks to Bill Hudgins, who says "They didn't get far on foot.")

Posted by Dave on July 23, 2021 at 10:32 AM
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