Dave Barry's Blog

WITH AN OASIS TRIBUTE BAND

Dozens of customers at Britain's highest pub are set to spend a third night trapped by heavy snowfall brought by Storm Arwen.

(Thanks to MOTW and Peter Metrinko)

WE'RE A LITTLE LATE WITH THIS, BUT:

Happy Hanukkah, blog people of the Tribe!

THIS IS WHY SAFETY EXPERTS SAY YOU SHOULD ALWAYS KEEP IT IN THE MICROWAVE

Ammo stored in toaster oven ignites at assisted living site, South Carolina cops say

FLORIDA MAN WORKS OUT

An affidavit states that the sisters were using an exercise machine while the man, identified as 78-year-old Robert Edward Dvorak, was waiting for his turn. Authorities said the man then sat on one of the women to use the machine instead.

(Thanks to pharmaross)

CANADA: LAND OF EXCITEMENT

Woody the talking Christmas tree returns to N.S. mall after 15-year hiatus

(Thanks to EricY)

NOPE

Retired Men’s Nude Beach Volleyball League announced for Steam

(Thanks to pharmaross)

WE HARDLY KNEW YE

Mr Goxx, the cryptocurrency-trading hamster, dies

(Thanks to Barry Nester)

WHEN YOU REALLY GOTTA GO

Behold the Boeing Jet-Powered Outhouse That Runs a 31-Second Quarter-Mile

(Thanks to pharmaross)

YOU ARE NOW FREE TO STOP

Woman found ‘breastfeeding cat’ onboard flight

(Thanks to pharmaross and Suzie Q Wacvet)

IF THAT THING DOESN'T PROMOTE ROAD SAFETY, WE DON'T KNOW WHAT WILL

Opinions divided after Melbourne council splashes $22k on bizarre sculpture as part of road safety grant

(Thanks to pharmaross)

WITHOUT LAWS, WE WOULD HAVE ANARCHY

They Say She Rigged a Homecoming Queen Contest. She Faces Decades Behind Bars.

(Thanks to pharmaross)

DUH

All cats have ‘an element of psychopathy’, according to new study

(Thanks to Le Petomane)

WHEW

McDonald’s accused of maggots in soda machine — but they’re just ‘earthworms’

(Thanks to Tom Meerschaert)

EVEN IF YOU’RE A WOMAN!

Brushing your teeth twice a day can boost your sperm count.

(Thanks to pharmaross)

HAS THE INTERNET DESTROYED JOURNALISM?

Why do you ask?

(Thanks to Steve K.)

WELCOME TO HELEN, GA.!

“They can truly kick me out in the middle of the night, from a hotel for giving a review of three and five?” Leger asked the police officer. “And he says, ‘yes, ma'am. It’s within the law.’”

(Thanks to B&C)

GUESS THE CONTINENT

Cat Alerts Owner to Deadly Snake Hiding in Shopping Bags

The family were setting up their tree on Wednesday when they discovered a snake had slithered among the tinsel and decorations.

(Thanks to pharmaross)

IT WAS RELEASED AFTER PRODUCING ETC.

Florida Mom Pulls Giant Python Out of Car Wearing Flip Flops and Apron

(Thanks to Geoff Scot, who says "So...the Python was wearing flip flops?")

(Looks to this blog as though the car was wearing the flip flops.)

YOU MEAN THEY HAVEN'T ALREADY?

The swine bomb: is 2021 the year wild hogs take over the world?

(Thanks to The Perts)

BIG DEAL. THEY CAN ALREADY DRIVE LEGALLY IN FLORIDA.

The UK Will Finally Officially Recognize Octopuses And Crabs as Sentient Beings

(Thanks to Jim Kenaston)