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August 02, 2010

Weekend Wrap-up: Cougars, newlyweds, Ke$ha, & cheating NBA has-beens, oh my!

2010-07-31_01-18-04It was a busy weekend having nothing to do with Lindsay Lohan's release from jail or Chelsea Clinton's nuptials. Between Rihanna in town and T.I. marrying his girlfriend, Tameka "Tiny" Cottle at the Miami Beach courthouse and then on Star Island, it was almost A-list. We emphasize almost because the not quite a singer named Ke$ha, whom we prefer to call Ke¢ha, was here, too, opening for Rihanna at her Saturday AAA show. Before heading to Cameo late Saturday night, where Rihanna,  Nelly, Ashanti, Usher, Jermaine Dupri and T.I. were hanging out (because Cameo's exactly where you'd choose to go directly after getting hitched), Ke¢ha was spotted at the Robert Plant show at Bayfront, where we hope she sent her song "Tik Tok" on its own Stairway to Heaven. Meanwhile, over at Club Play Friday, ex basketball wife Shaunie O'Neal was seen with 23-year-old model boyfriend Marlon Yates. According to our source, Yates "Followed her around like a young puppy."  Of course he did. After her first marriage to an alleged philanderer didn't work out, the ex Mrs. Shaq obivously hired herself the best dog whisperer money could buy. And speaking of philandering, our inbox was full this morning after a deep throat with a deep seated vendetta sent us countless emails between a certain ex NBA player and a certain Miami philanthropist. Apparently said NBA has-been, a married man, did what lots of wealthy athletes do: he cheated on his wife. And with words like the following, if we were his wife, we'd let the other woman have him: "I wanted to take your clothes off right there and LICK YOU.... I was fine. I came right home and took a cold shower and went to bed. And I didn't think about no one on the trip. I couldn't call you from Michigan because I was with the family. So what are we going to do about us?" As for the "us," well, as far as we know, that's done already. And as for why we're keeping this anonymous, let's just say we have Spam written by more famous people than this email. We just  hope the wife in this case gets hold of that same dog whisperer Shaunie O'Neal used.