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July 28, 2010

Jersey Shore viewing party: May cause extreme nausea or severe discoloration


Like a car accident on I-95, you know you can't help but look, if but for a quick second. Same goes for the trainwreck/90 car pile up called Jersey Shore, whose second season, partly filmed right here in Miami, will debut on MTV tomorrow night. However, like the Blair Witch Project and Paranormal Activity, watching too much Jersey Shore will most likely induce severe nausea.  It seems like just yesterday that places like Mynt and pretty much everywhere else not located on Ocean Drive were so aghast, they basically said they'd sooner let a serial killer into their fine establishments than the cast of that show. And wisely so. According to People magazine, the "producers made Miami look as ugly as Seaside Heights, NJ." And that's not even including J-Woww's wardrobe or lack thereof. But if you're gonna watch, you may as well do so at the Catalina, the sister property of the hotel (the Metropole) that probably needed a Hazmat team to sterilize the place after the giddy gang o' guidos packed up their spray tan, Valtrex bottles and Aqua Net and left. And even though the Metropole wisely decided to 86 plans to charge thousands a night for the Snooki Slept Here suite, it doesn't mean they can't celebrate. Which they will tomorrow night at Maxine's Bistro and Bar at the Catalina at 9 p.m. with much food, drink and fanfare--for instance, go dressed as a Jersey Shore cast member and get a free Jersey Shore Situation cocktail. That's almost as good as dressing like a cow for a free sandwich at Chik-Fil-A, though we think we'd rather do that and pay for our cocktail rather than dress like a burnt, overinflated, puffy, pumpkin.


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Great drama to start off the second season. I hope Angelina dosen't get beat up by the rest of the girls. I think I like Angelina.
I've never seen Ronnie so drunk before. I don't think he realises what a great thing he has going with Sammie, or I could be completely wrong.
I wish I was able to see it live in South Beach at Maxine's with a group of pretty guidette's, but I live in Broward and have to get up early.

Lesley, what did you think of the first episode?


I thought it was hideous. Like, more hideous than all the episodes of the first season combined. Awful, contrived, and boring. And People was right. Miami looked like something Ronnie threw up the following morning. I think this show overextended its stay on TV, frankly. Of course, I will still watch as long as my stomach can handle it to see if anything has improved. I found the first season to be so amusing because they were unknowns acting naturally. Now I feel they're all playing to the cameras. Zzzz.


It did look pretty bad when those two girls at B.E.D. were licking Ronnie's drunk sweaty face.

I hope you can make it through the next show without getting the dry heaves.

Keep the barf bag close by the TV.

Same barf time, same barf channel.

We'll compare notes next week.

CAPlastic Surgeon

Yuck. Why is this show so popular again? Oh, right. Because we have nothing else to do but sit in front of our TV's getting dumber by the day.

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