1) It is WEDNESDAY, MAY 8. New blogpost coming later this morning! 2) The Steelers signed an offensive tackle named Guy Whimper. That's right: Guy Whimper. 3) In The Previous Blogpost (ITPB): LeBron's MVP, updated NBA playoff odds, Dolphins' stadium loss, Tyson Clabo, Orb, media bias, Sad-O-Meter retired. 4) Join us on Twitter @agregcote.
G1: BULLS 93, HEAT 86: MIAMI FLAT AFTER LONG LAYOFF(Bulls lead 1-0; Game 2 Wednesday in Miami): Too easy to blame the rest and the rust. Too convenient. That might explain the slow start for Miami Monday, but does it also explain the Heat leading by four after three quarters and then surrendering 35 fourth-quarter points? Miami shot poorly (39.7%), got out-rebounded and maybe underestimated the Bulls' will. "Our backs are against the wall now," said Chris Bosh. "We have to respond." The backs-against-wall thing might be a bit dramatic, or at least early. But the need to respond Wednesday in Game 2 is beyond paramount. ..... Original post: The Bulls are talking the talk, but when they try to walk the walk, the walk has a limp. Can an injured, hobbled Chicago squad coming
right off a wearying 7-game series stand up to a rested, reigning
champion? Let's find out! Bulls will be missing both Luol Deng and Kirk Hinrich tonight, and a couple of other guys, notably Joakim Noah (foot; pictured left in an intimate moment with LeBron James) are not 100 percent. Then there's the whole missing Derrick Rose drama. Da Bulls are feisty, though, still smarting over the 2011 playoffs when Chicago was top-seeded but got bounced by Miami in five games. That's when Noah called the flashy Heat "Hollywood as hell," remember? This time around, says Bull Taj Gibson, "Words cannot express how badly we want to beat them." Added teammate Marco
Belinelli, "We're not going to be scared and our mentality is to win." OK good luck with that. Fully healthy (Rose, Deng) I do think Chitown matches up pretty well, as a rugged-defending, strong-rebounding team. They can stretch this series if Carlos Boozer comes up big and Nate Robinson is hot. But the Bulls just aren't healthy. Oh, and Miami ain't Brooklyn. Series pick: Heat in 5 games.
SHOULD DERRICK ROSE BE PLAYING?: It's the question Chicagoans have been wondering, and now it
overshadows this Heat-Bulls playoff series that starts tonight. Derrick Rose, star guard, had his knee surgery almost exactly one year ago and is medically cleared to play but says he is not ready. "You want that (to play), but you've got to look at the big picture," he said over the weekend. "If I'm not healthy, no way I'm stepping on the court. I'm in control of the whole process." It is not ruled out that Rose might return later in this Heat series -- but not expected. Imagine if Rose were on your team. How would you feel about his continuing caution. Vote and say why.
MEET GARY WASHBURN, PROFESSIONAL SPOIL SPORT: The Boston Globe's Celtics writer Gary Washburn (pictured) has identified himself with a story today as being the one voter, of 121, who did not cast a first-place vote for LeBron James for NBA MVP. James would have been the first unanimous winner ever if not for Washburn, who voted for the Knicks' ball-hoggin' Carmelo Anthony. Washburn made two points in his mea culpa. One was that he was surprised to be the lone wolf, thinking that Kevin Durant, Anthony, CHris Paul and perhaps Kobe Bryant all would get first-place votes. (Dear Gary: No, because everybody else but you knew who the clear MVP choice was). His second point was, "I thought Anthony was the most valuable player to his team this season, not the best player in the league." (Dear Gary: Voters every year, including 120 of 121 this year, sort of see it as a league-wide award, not a team award). I was harsh last night in the blog to call the then-mystery voter an "idiot." I don't think Washburn, whom I do not know, is an idiot. I do think he's a guy who cast a really bad vote that he'll wear like an ill-fitting suit the rest of his career.
SERENA WILLIAMS SLAMMED BY PROTEGE: Rising American tennis star Sloane Stephens, 20, calls her former hero Serena Williams, 31, a fraud who has been unkind and shunned her. Surprising stuff (click here to read), because I saw Serena as a mentor to Stephens. Not shocking, though. Serena is a real diva and I have written as much, including noting during the recent Key Biscayne tournament here that she kept a room full of reporters waiting close to an hour without a word of explanation, let alone apology.
UPDATED BASEBALL AWARDS ODDS: From Bovada, favorites as of today: NL MVP, Braves' Justin Upton 9-2; Cy Young, Dodgers' Clayton Kershaw 3-1. AL MVP, Tigers' Miguel Cabrera 2-1; Cy Young, Red Sox's Clay Buchholz 11-4.
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1) It is TUESDAY, APRIL 2. World's worst-kept secret confirmed: Dolphins made it official that this is the new logo. Had planned to reveal it coincidental with NFL Draft but it was out so why wait? 2) Sorry again about missing yesterday's live blog chat. We'll get back at it next Monday. 3) Hope y'all had a Happy Easter. See below for our special "Cavalcade of Creepy Bunnies." 4) In The Previous Blogpost (ITPB): Canes out/March Madness, Brent Grimes, Riley rips Ainge, Marlins odds, Doug Gottlieb, Bosh's camel. 5) Join us on Twitter @agregcote.
Gratuitous April Fool's Joke: Ricky Williams records song!: Well there's no point in trying to sell this as real, given the date, technology like Shazam and the fact anybody listening to music in the '90s may know the song. But I'll be damned if the voice and trippy lyrics in THIS SONG don't sound like something Ricky Williams might do. So pass this along to any gullible friends. Enjoy.
PLAY BALL! MARLINS OPEN SEASON AT NATS:[Update: Marlins lose opener at Washington, 2-0, yesterday on a pair of Bryce Harper homers. Decent start by Ricky Nolasco but negligible offense against Stephen Strasburg]. The home opener isn't for a week, but Miami launches its 21st season at Washington, the new darling-favorite of the NL
East and also seen as a stacked World Series contender. Quite a contrast to the young, low-payroll (again) Marlins. Click on They Make It Difficult for my Marlins season-preview column. Club president David Samson says he wishes Marlins fans would leave their anger behind and "just enjoy baseball again," as if the club's own actions with the latest fire-sale/payroll-slash hadn't fractured trust and made that so difficult. Having said that, spring is all about renewal (say the baseball poets), and Opening Day always sees the slate wiped, so let's try on a bit of optimism. Or at least benefit of doubt. Shall we? This is a time that challenges Marlins fans witha big decision: What does being a fan mean? My feeling always has been that a team is not its owner; a team is bigger. I think fans can think the worst of Jeffrey Loria and still support their team. I may be wrong. We'll see. For now, for better or worse, ready or not ... play ball!
FINAL FOUR SET! WHERE IS YOUR ROOTING INTEREST? VOTE NOW: Two by-seed upsets on Saturday and another in Sunday's first game left one Cinderella standing in the men's
NCAA Tournament as it pared from eight teams to the Final Four. A synopsis of the Elite Eight games is below, but first, it's time to take sides. Which of the Final Four teams -- Louisville, Michigan, Syracuse or Wichita State -- will you be rooting for? Remember, this is not asking who you predict will win, but rather who you most want to win. Vote and say why:
Final Four odds: No surprises here. Courtesy Bovada, Louisville a prohibitive championship favorite at 2-3, followed by Michigan 3-1, Syracuse 17-4 and Wichita State 12-1.
Elite Eight results:
* No. 4 Michigan d. No. 3 Florida, 79-59;in Arlington, Tex. Florida was favored by 3 points in game of keen interest in Miami area because of slew of Gators alum down here and also the left-over animus toward UF from old days when Canes-Gators was bitter rivalry. Gators trailed 11-0 out the gate and never recovered, with Michigan solving a very good UF defense despite an off-game by Tim Hardaway's kid.
* No. 1 Louisville d. No. 2 Duke, 85-63; in Indianapolis, Ind. Louisville was favored by 3 1/2 points. It was 1 vs. 2 and Coach K vs. Rick Pitino. Don't get much better! Canes fans would have strong feelings watching Duke, UM's biggest ACC rival, while Pitino's son now coaches FIU. Cardinals won despite losing Kevin Ware to an ugly broken leg. Louisville will meet Michigan in one semifinal next week.
* No. 4 Syracuse d. No. 3 Marquette, 55-39; Orangemen used suffocating defense to vanquish the team that vanquished the Hurricanes. Even many 'Cuse fans think Jim Boeheim is an a--hole, but the man can coach. Orange will face Wichita State in the other semifinal and be favored.
* No. 9 Wichita State d. No. 2 Ohio State, 70-66; Wichita State led by 20 then held on to play March Madness' Last Cinderella Standing. And what were the odds that the biggest surviving surprise team of the tournament would be nicknamed Shockers? I mean, seriously.
National championships represented by Final Four teams: 4 -- 2 by Louisville (1986-80); 1 each by Syracuse (2003) & Michigan (1977); 0 by Wichita State.
TAKE THAT, SPURS! LEBRON, WADE SIT, HEAT WIN ANYWAY: Miami sat LeBron James and Dwyane Wade vs. Spurs Sunday but Heat won anyway on a last second shot by Chris Bosh. Turnabout was fair play. Remember when San Antonio controversially sat its stars for the game in Miami? The 27-game win streak was great.
Won't retro-fit as meaningless just because it ended. But tonight felt like the game that would better indicate Miami's likelihood of repeating as champion. It's a very possible if not likely NBA Finals preview. It had been much anticipated. Heat had won three straight over Spurs so both teams would be looking to make a statement -- or so one might have thought. But Heat's lineup manuever changed everything. This makes that prospective NBA Finals matchup all the more interesting.
Two words for Herald's 'Heat 25' poll:Sammy Schulman!?: He is a Heat front-office executive, a background guy. Nothing against him personally. No doubt he does a great job. But he is an example of the pitfall in picking a franchise's 25 most influential figures on its 25th anniversary, as the Miami Herald is now doing with the Heat. We offer 46 candidates. There are 12 to 15 at most who are clearly deserving of this honor. There are an equal number who have no business being on the ballot. The top 10 in early voting, in order, are: Pat Riley, Dwyane Wade, LeBron James, Alonzo Mourning, Erik Spoelstra, Micky Arison, Tim Hardaway, Udonis Haslem, Shaquille O'Neal and Chris Bosh. You can vote here. Let's stuff the ballot for Sammy Schulman!!!
THE THREE TENORS? HOW ABOUT THE THREE COLUMNS!: I hit a trey in Sunday's newspaper and online. That's a rarity. 1) The regular Sunday notes column (click Random Evidence) leading with NCAA hoops. 2) A live column (click Serena's Reign) off Saturday's women's tennis final on Key Biscayne. And 3) a Marlins/baseball preview section column (click The Oddest Season) on how Miami opens its 21st season Monday surrounded by so much fan anger. I need a rest. (Well, except for blogging of course).
EASTER SPECIAL: CAVALCADE OF CREEPY BUNNIES!: I know this was a serious, joyous holiday for believers because Jesus rose from the dead. But since this is a blog and not a church, I figured I'd mark the holiday by picturing a few of the creepiest looking Easter bunnies I could find. Click on the photos for a larger view. Warning: They may haunt your dreams.
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[1) It is WEDNESDAY, MARCH 27. Dolphins today signed OG Lance Louis, the former Bear. 2) Tim McCarver announcing today he'll retire from Fox Sports after this year's World Series. 3) In the Previous Blogpost (ITPB): Herald building/stuff in my abandoned desk, Heat worry, Dolphins stadium vote, Madness, Marlins. 4) Join us on Twitter @agregcote.
HEAT STREAK ENDS AT 27: Miami loses tonight at Chicago, 101-97, ending its 27-game winning streak, trailing only the Lakers' 33-game run in 1971-72. Not a bad thing, this loss. Shot at history is over, but so is the pressure. Now Heat can concentrate on readying for the playoffs. Meantime, predictionmachine.com had played that Lakers-Heat matchup 50,000 times and found the '72 Lakers beating this Heat team 54.4 percent of the time. Computer had given Miami a 17% percent chance to tie L.A.'s record and 15.1% chance to beat it, all a moot point now.
DOLPHINS' NEW LOGO: LIKE OR NO LIKE?: Back on March 18 this blog was the first at The Miami Herald to bring you the new Dolphins logo that had been leaked. (It will be officially revealed by the club during
next month's NFL Draft). Today my newspaper has a story about how the "buzz rises" over the new design. My first thought was to smile at the timing, at the idea that -- in the midst of a history-chasing Heat win streak and the Canes' historic run in March Madness -- it's the new logo that we as a
sports community might be buzzing about. My second thought was to throw a blog poll up in here, because it's fine there is a new logo (it'll certainly spike merchandise sales), but the question is whether fans like it. Is it better? An improvement? The current and new logos are presented above right side by side here. (Sorry about the Mystery Thumb on the new logo; it belongs to whomever leaked the photo). Dolphin Jared Odrick seems shocked to be wearing the new logo, at left. The iconic starburst is a bit different but major change is that the new dolphin loses the helmet with the 'M' and is more stylized. Old dolphin appears to be standing on its tail; new one appears to be swimming. Compare the logos, vote for which you prefer and say why.
HEAT BIG 5 @ 70: Miami fell short in it bid for a 28th straight win tonight at Chicago. Meantime, the blog
loves bells 'n whistles especially the nerdy-stat variety and so we started this one we are running throughout Heat season at five-game intervals (although we skipped 65). It's top-five cumulative ranking of Heat players having the biggest overall impact based on eight statistical categories. The numbers themselves might not mean much but the numbers relative to each other give an indication of the contribution players are making. The Big 5 @ 70 Games (56-14, entering tonight):
Rank (@60) Player Total
1 (1) LeBron James 2,707.1
2 (2) Dwyane Wade 1,869.6
3 (3) Chris Bosh 1,601.8
4 (4) Mario Chalmers 1,093.5
5 (5) Ray Allen 1,027.3
Bubble: Shane Battier, 710.6
GRATUITOUS AMANDA MARCUM UPDATE: Our daily unabashedly sexist dose of Amanda Marcum, wife of Florida Gulf Coast coach Andy Enfield, while waiting for the Hurricanes to resume play (Thursday night) in the NCAA Tournament. If I didn't know any better, I'd swear the Tiger Woods photo just below keeps sneaking glances up at Amanda.
ON NIKE'S NEW TIGER WOODS AD: The situation: Tiger Woods this week regains his world No. 1 ranking for first time since October 2010 and Nike whips out the ad pictured, using one of Tiger's own quotes. The controversy: Mr. Internet and Ms. Twitter seem to think the quote alludes dismissively to his past marital/infidelity woes and that the ad sends The Wrong Message. The truth: Get upset about something that matters. It's a bleepin' Nike ad. [And in an unrelated story, Tiger Woods Adds Celebration Where He Slowly Licks Shaft of Putter. Man, how I love The Onion!]
THE SAD MEN OF KEY BISCAYNE: Sony tennis moves toward this coming weekend's finals and the men's side is hurting. Roger Federer didn't enter this year, Rafael Nadal unexpectedly withdrew, and now world No. 1 Novak Djokovic has been ousted by German journeyman Tommy Haas -- at a week shy of 35 the oldest man in 30 years to defeat a top-ranked player. That leaves Andy Murray the only person left on the men's side who wiggles the interest meter.
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[1) It is SATURDAY, MARCH 23. Ultra Music Festival continuing in downtown Miami. Like most genres of sound but admit electronic music not one of my favorites. Don't like a group needing a laptop in their performance. 2) Click on Duke Johnson for a 2-minute ESPN video interview with the Canes' running back. Around the 1:30 mark it sounds like the interviewer calls him Eric, but I may be wrong. 3) In the Previous Blogpost (ITPB): Heat miracle rally, my bracket, betting on Canes, Oreo cat. 4) Join us on Twitter @agregcote.
OC Dolphin wins March Madness Haiku Challenge!: Congratulations to blog-community giant OC Dolphin for his champion haiku: "Miami, home of roundball * Heat, second to none * Canes, joining the fun." The judges overlooked a lack of classic 5-7-5 phrasing, charmed by simplicity and use of the word 'roundball.' Runnerup: I Am Kazaam (bandwagons). Honorable mention: Sean Millerick (three -ologys), Redsky (twisted testes) and Brian S (pots and pans). Thanks to all! Aside to OC Dolphin: Email me at gcote@miamiherald.com with your prize choice: 2012 Heat championship book, 2013 Dolphins media guide, or segment in-studio on Le Batard radio show on 790 the Ticket.
SEISMIC: TITLE-CHASING CANES WIN OPENER, RECORD-CHASING HEAT WIN AGAIN: Probably should have called yesterday Fantastic Friday, but wasn't in an alliterative mood. The Hurricanes opened play in the men's NCAA Tournament as a No. 2 seed (winning easily; see below), and later the Heat returned home in search of its 25th consecutive victory and got it -- moving ever closer to the Lakers' venerable 1971-72 NBA record of 33. It was the ultimate smorgasbord doubleheader for a Miami basketball junkie. And it's a close call (at least to me) which is the bigger story right now: the Canes' school-record high entry into March Madness, or the Heat's run at history? Let's set the table on each, after which we offer a poll for your vote:
No. 2 Hurricanes d. No. 15 Pacific, 78-49 -- Miami was a comfortable 12-point favorite, but two No. 15s won in this round a year ago, and yesterday No. 15 Florida Gulf Coast won. (They do call this Madness, remember). Having said that, I couldn't imagine UM losing, and they made it look easy with Durand Scott's 21 points leading the way in Austin, Tex. I eschewed homerism, but admitted my beleaguered bracket was rooting for a Canes win. Up next: UM vs. Illinois on Sunday. Pictured: Yesterday's official alert for the people of the Pacific region. (Our two other state teams also debuted, both last night: No. 3 Florida handled Northwestern State, 79-47, also in Austin; and Florida Gulf Coast stunned -- stunned-- Georgetown, 78-68, in Philadelphia).
Miami Heat d. Detroit Pistons, 103-89 -- Detroit stinks and had lost nine straight. Should have been a rout, but you know how that goes. Miami (and its fans) could have used one of those drama-free routs after recent coronary-inducing comeback wins at Boston and Cleveland. They sort of got that. Detroit led into the third quarter before the Heat took over, and convincingly. So the streak goes silver at 25, lending a new meaning to the club's (pictured) anniversary logo. Click HERE for my column off last night's latest win.
Now, the poll!: Remember this is not a favorite-team poll and not asking whether you'd prefer the Heat set the streak record or the Canes win a national title. This is asking which is the bigger story right now: Heat making the most serious run ever at a 41-year-old record some thought would never be broken? Or magical Canes season continuing as No. 2 seed in NCAAs? Vote and say why. (I know. It's apples 'n oranges and you hate having to choose, but, c'mon. It's just a blog poll!)
FLORIDA GULF COAST!?! MADNESS BY THE NUMBERS (entering Saturday play): A daily tracking of upsets and my bracket in the men's NCAA Tournament. Upset watch: Total games played so far--32, excluding play-ins. Upsets by seeding--9 (28.1%). Biggest upsets by seed: 15-Florida Gulf Coast d. 2-Georgetown, 14-Hahvahd I mean Harvard d. 3-New Mexico. My bracket: Teams eliminated so far--12. Ouch. Biggest losses--Oklahoma State, Kansas State and Georgetown, which I had all winning in next round, too.
SERENA HAD IT RIGHT ALL ALONG: I was pleased to be down on Key Biscayne for tennis this week, and
produced this column off Serena Williams' opening match. Critics have hit Serena hard over the years (me included) for her outside interests that seemed to convey a lack of devotion to tennis. But those outside interests and the pace of her career are what have kept her fresh and elongated her prime. She won her 14th and 15th majors just last year. She has become the oldest women (at 31) to be ranked No. 1. She neither sought nor needed vindication, but has earned it anyway.
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[1) It is WEDNESDAY, MARCH 20. No surprise that Jake Long is a former Dolphin, now a St. Louis Ram. A few seasons of living up to the No. 1 billing, then a pretty fast decline. 2) In The Previous Blogpost (ITPB): Miami's Basketpalooza! Canes win ACC title, Heat win 22nd straight, NCAA Selection Sunday. 3) Join us on Twitter @agregcote.
* Heat streak at 23 after win in Boston: Enormously impressive 105-103 Miami win for 23rd straight, now alone for second-longest streak in NBA history, with LeBron James leading the way with 37. Trying to make it 24 tonight in Cleveland.
* Dolphins' new logo?: Pictured is the likeliest evidence I have yet seen of the Dolphins' new logo to be unveiled next month. In other Dolphin news, Miami and Dallas will kick off 2013 NFL preseason Aug. 4 in annual Hall of Fame Game in Canton, O. And club has been given extra 5th- and 7th-round compensatory draft picks for last year's free-agent departures of Chad Henne, Will Allen and Kendall Langford.
* Hurricanes 7th-best national-title odds: Miami is 14-to-1 to win NCAA national championship, says new Bovada odds. Favorite Louisville at 19-4. Florida Gators 7-1.
*UM women in Big Dance, too: No. 8 seed Miami opens Sunday vs. No. 9 Iowa in women's NCAA's.
* Tennis, anyone?: Annual ATP/WTA event on Key Biscayne has begun. Click on Paradise Found for my latest column, an ode to the Tennis Center of Crandon Park, the oasis on the island.
8TH ANNUAL MARCH MADNESS HAIKU CHALLENGE!
PRIZE-LIST REVEALED: Our new Haiku champion -- to be chosen on Wednesday -- will get his or her choice of the following three prizes: A Miami Herald commemorative coffee-table book celebrating the Heat's 2012 championship ..... a 2013 Dolphins media guide (available in August) ..... or an opportunity to sit in for a Tuesday radio segment on the air with Dan Le Batard, Stugotz and myself on 790 the Ticket/FM 104.3. Enter now! Time running out...
ENTRIES CLOSED; WINNER REVEALED BY MID-AFTERNOON TODAY!
FREE YOUR INNER POET. ENTER HAIKU CHALLENGE NOW: This is the official entry point for our blog's eighth annual March Madness Haiku Challenge. The contest illogically endures despite sometimes tepid response owing to too few inspired souls able to see and appreciate the natural marriage of American
college basketball mania and Japanese short-form poetry. I call this a "boutique" contest due to most folks running scared from haiku as if it were a rabid dog chasing them. In other words your odds of winning aren't bad should you dare to delve. Contest rules? Very simple:
1. Haikus must in some way be about the NCAA Tournament or NIT (men's or women's, Miami-themed or national, serious or funny) and must be in haiku form, or 17 syllables. Classic 5-7-5 metrical phrasing preferred but not required, and rhyme-or-no-rhyme is your call, but only entries of exactly 17 syllables will be considered. An example of haiku is shown.
2. Enter as many times as you like in the Comments section here, but only one entry per comment, please! Haikus must be entered as a comment here in this blogpost to be considered. In the case of similar haikus, favored status goes to first posted.
There will be a prize for the best, most original or inventive haiku; see above for the three choices. Enter soon because we plan to shut off entries and announce a winner Wednesday.
The defending 2012 Haiku Challenge champion is Frydad4. Winning entry: "My bracket's busted * Like Sara in accounting * Who might win it all." The judges noted the 5-7-5 phrasing, enjoyed the cheeky yet ambiguous reference to Sara's bosom and also liked the nod to office pools.
Our CHAMPIONS ROLL CALL: 2012--Frydad4; 2011--OC Dolphin; 2010--I Am Kazaam; 2009--r.duke; 2008--Tococane; 2007--Bruce and David Tucker (tie); and 2006--Kurt from Boca.
Now, don't be scared. Have fun. Ready ... set ...haiku!
[1) It is THURSDAY, JANUARY 24. Unsurprisingly the Heat's Chris Bosh was named today to NBA Eastern all-star team as a reserve. 2) UM has hired Florida State offensive coordinator James Coley to that position with the Canes. A big hire. Bright young guy (well, 39) and also a top-notch recruiter. 3) I offer this link to my Ron Fraser tribute column -- Great Coach, Better Man -- because, based on the volume and content of my emails, it has touched readers. That is because of the subject, not the writer. 4) In The Previous Blogpost (ITPB): LeBron/Wade karaoke video, Jeff Ireland's plan, Ray Lewis vs. Bro Bowl, Obama/MLK. 5) Join us on Twitter @gregcote]
NCAA admits improper conduct in UM probe: NCAA president Mark Emmert called for a review of his enforcement program after acknowledging "improper conduct" related to the ongoing UM/Nevin Shapiro investigation. The NCAA said that "former enforcement staff members worked with Shapiro's criminal defense lawyer to improperly obtain information that would not otherwise have been accessible." Miami and Canes fans may presume that the NCAA will not -- and should not -- hold against UM any information improperly accessed. An official NCAA Notice of Allegations against UM is expected in February. Click on NCAA Probe of UM Now A Joke for my latest column.
UM STUNS/CRUSHES/ROUTS NO. 1 DUKE!: Greatest night in the history of Hurricanes basketball? I would not argue. Last night's 90-63 rout of Duke by the 25th-ranked Canes was UM's first-ever victory over a No. 1-ranked opponent. It also was Duke's worst defeat in 15 years. A more thorough spanking I have seldom seen. Such great, fierce defense. Such clutch offense by Durand Scott and the guys. Such relentlessness. Oh, and the unexpected return of Reggie Johnson. Fans storming the court as it ended; click What A Rush for the video of it. What a night for this program! Every season with a senior-dominated team has a now-or-never feel. Well, last night the Canes stood up and shouted: NOW! (Oh, by the way. The Heat won last night, too). Original post: Rock it up, Canes fans. Be the Gables Crazies. Turn this into a College Hoops joint for one night. This happens about once every, well, never, so shout it while you can: Heat and UM men play home games concurrently tonight, and the Canes game is
bigger. By a lot. Heat game has a lot to offer, too: The guys are back home after a five-game break and six-game road trip, they're playing Chris Bosh's ex's, Toronto, and we'll probably see the debut of the team's newly signed DR (designated rebounder) and tattoos leader, Chris "Birdman" Andersen. But! The 25th-ranked Canes top that with a packed gym tonight (itself a rarity) vs. No. 1 Duke. When ESPN and Dick Vitale are on
campus doing the game you know it's big, bay-bee! Coach Jim Larranaga's Canes will try to make school history tonight by being the first UM men's team ever to beat a No. 1-ranked opponent. Miami has beaten two No. 2s in its history: Duke, here, on Dec. 21, 1962, and at UConn on Feb. 20, 1999. Pictured: UM's Kenny Kadji, Duke coach Mike Krzyzewki, Vitale and Sebastian the Ibis. No matter tonight's result, Miami has Sweet 16 potential when center Reggie Johnson is back from injury. A loss tonight won't change that. But a win? It would be the biggest in the regular-season in UM history, and the ultimate statement by these Hurricanes.
FIASCO: LORIA RENEGED. SELIG RENEGED. WE LOSE: Miami and Marlins Park were supposed to get MLB's 2015 All-Star Game. It was an implied more than actual promise by baseball and commissioner Bud
Selig contingent on the new stadium being built. The thing is, the team and owner Jeffrey Loria got that park built with the implied more than actual promise that big payrolls and competitive teams would result. That lasted one failed season, followed by the standard fan-betraying, promise-betraying payroll-slash. Did Selig renege? Yes. Why? Because Loria reneged first. (Pictured: the Reneging Twins). I cannot blame baseball for refusing to reward Loria. Nor do I buy the notion that MLB should give Miami the ASG and its satellite events to "save" baseball in South Florida. A few days of festivities won't save baseball here. What will is an owner who takes advantage of the new ballpark by keeping his word, by spending and fielding strong teams.
SPORTS: THE GREAT, UNSCRIPTED DRAMA: I love sports because it writes itself, live, and the ending defies prediction. Sometimes it produces something couldn't-make-it-up bizarre, like the Manti Te'o girlfriend hoax. And sometimes it produces drama that might seem too hokey for a movie ending -- except it really happened, like yesterday at the Australian Open. The Stunna Down Unda: American Sloane Stephens, 19 (pictured), a Broward girl, upset her idol, Serena Williams, in the quarterfinals. When too-good-to-be-true is true. That's sports at its best.
Poll result: Lewis edges Harbaughs for biggest Super Bowl storyline: It was 52.3 percent for Ray Lewis' farewell and 42.4% for the coaching Bro Bowl when we asked in the previous blogpost what was the biggest SB storyline. The other 5.3% voted "something else."
GRATUITOUS CHEERLEADER ITEM GOES HERE: I would like to report that the Miami Dolphins
cheerleaders -- no rest for the buxom! -- are currently abroad on a goodwill tour of military bases. The women Tweeted out the photo shown. [Aside to photographer: Showing the backs of cheerleaders may not have been your smartest cinematic option. I'm just sayin']. The women are pictured at Moron Air Base in Spain. Please give the word "Moron" a proper little Spanish tongue-roll and get the emphasis on that second syllable please!
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[1) It is TUESDAY, JANUARY 1. Happy New Year, everybody! 2) Find results of season-final Dolfan Satisfaction Meter poll in blogpost directly below this. 3) Join us on Twitter @gregcote]
HEAT CHAMPIONSHIP DOMINATES AS 2012 MIAMI SPORTS STORY OF YEAR: We asked you previously to name the year's top national sports story and you did (results at bottom of this blogpost). Now we asked you to select the 2012 Miamisports story of the year, and of 16 choices the Heat's LeBron James-led NBA title won clearly with 22.3 percent. I personally chose the Top 16 local stories of the year and invited you to pick your top five (5). The consensus of all of you would shape what the biggest or most significant story was and set the order. I had an order in mind but our list below and in the poll is chronological so you won't be unduly influenced by somebody else's ranking. The real race was for second place, with the opening of the Marlins' new ballpark (12.6%) edging the Dolphins drafting Ryan Tannehill and the Marlins' latest fire sale (both 12.5%). Here is a brief synopsis of the contenders, followed by the poll...
Orange Bowl Game Sets Records (January): Miramar's Geno Smith leads West Virginia past Clemson, 70-33, record for points in bowl game.
Dolphins Hire Joe Philbin (January): Miami hires Green Bay's offensive coordinator, never before a head coach, to lead its new era.
Dolphins Trade Brandon Marshall (March): Team trades talented but mercurial receiver to Bears for two third-round draft picks.
WGC Golf At Doral (March): England's Justin Rose wins annual World Golf Championship event on Doral's Blue Monster course.
Peyton Manning Turns Down Dolphins (March): Miami seeks Manning in free agency, is seen as early frontrunner, but loses him to Denver.
Sony Ericcson Tennis (March): Novak Djokovic and Agnieszka Radwanska win title in sport's "fifth major" on Key Biscayne.
Miami Hosts Wrestlemania (April): WWE's 28th Wrestlemania is hosted by South Florida for first time, held at Dolphins stadium.
Marlins New Stadium Debuts (April): Opening night had glitches, but team finally had new downtown ballpark after years of failed efforts.
Panthers Make NHL Playoffs (April): Hockey club ends league's longest drought, qualifies for Stanley Cup playoffs for first time since 2000.
Dolphins Draft Ryan Tannehill (April): Miami spends first-round draft pick (8th overall) on a quarterback for first time since Dan Marino in '83.
Heat Wins NBA Championship (June): MVP LeBron James leads Miami past Oklahoma City for his elusive first NBA title, city's second.
Guillen Fired After Nightmare Year (October): Marlins fire manager, hire Mike Redmond, after big payroll and high hopes end in last place.
Marlins' Latest Fire Sale (November): Stars Jose Reyes, Josh Johnson and others shipped to Toronto in a blatant cost-cutting that angers fans.
Homestead Ends NASCAR Year (November): Star Jeff Gordon wins race but Brad Keselowski owns day, capturing first NASCAR season title.
Hurricanes Self-Impose Bowl Ban (November): UM removes self from second straight bowl, awaits NCAA sanctions in Nevin Shapiro probe.
Postscript: No, I didn't forget about Marlins on The Franchise or Dolphins on Hard Knocks; those made-for-TV dramas just didn't make the cut. (This was going to be a Top 15, but I decided to include Wrestlemania for a bit of serendipity!). Did I leave anything out? Should I have included FIU firing Mario Cristobal?
Vote-percentage explainer: We invite readers to vote for as many as five choices in the above poll. If all voters cast the maximum five votes, the highest overall percentage for any one story would be 20 percent. The Heat-championship count of more than 20 percent means that story is being included in a vast majority of top fives and also garnering votes of those who opt to choose fewer than five stories.
Poll result: Penn State scandal named 2012's top national story: In the previous blogpost I let you vote on The Associated Press list of the year's Top 10 national sports stories (you may still vote), and the Penn State/Jerry Sandusky scandal was named the biggest with 31.3 percent, followed by the London Olympics with 16.8% and Lance Armstrong's fall from grace with 11.8%. Rounding out the top five were Peyton Manning's resurgence (9.2) and Saints' Bountygate (8.5).
Check back often to monitor evolving results in our year-end Miami poll...
[1) It is THURSDAY, DECEMBER 13. Hope y'all had a happy 12-12-12! 2) A high-school girls' basketball team, Bloomington South of Indiana, won a game, 107-2. Yes, one-hundred and seven to two. If coach Larry Winters also teaches at the school, I'm guessing what he teaches isn't sportsmanship. 3) Join us on Twitter @gregcote]
Dolphins-Jags on local TV: Club just announced, early evening today, that Sunday's Dolphins game here would be televised locally.
WOZNIACKI LAMPOONS SERENA'S FULL FIGURE: RACIST OR FUN?: I find this interesting. I find anything interesting when two people can view the same thing and see it so differently. Caroline
Wozniacki, former world No. 1 tennis player, this week had some fun at the expense of reigning WTA player of the year Serena Williams during an exhibition match in Sao Paulo, Brazil. Wozniacki stuffed her shirt and skirt with towels (pictured) to impersonate the buxom figure of Williams. Click here for the video. Some in the Twitterverse are outraged; others see it as harmless fun. I lean toward the latter (hard to offend me), but also see the sensitivity. Does it matter that Wozniacki and Williams are friends? Does it matter how Serena reacts? (She has not commented). Should it be a factor that Williams herself makes frequent reference to her buxom top and full bottom? What if another black woman had done the spoof instead of Wozniacki? Part of my thought here is that Wozniacki was not making fun of a physical deformity but rather offering a caricature of a figure that many and perhaps most find quite appealing. Certainly debatable, though. Your thoughts welcome. Vote in our new poll and say why.
A FIERCE-DEFENDING LEBRON TELLS WADE'S DOUBTERS TO BE QUIET: [Heat lose last night at home to Golden State. Looks like it's going to be one of those seasons. Dramamine, please] Original post: Just two games ago Miami had embarrasingly lost at awful Washington then been routed at home by New York and the critics were out.
They were personified by professional blowhard Charles Barkley broadcasting that Dwyane Wade is "starting to lose his talent." Well, two games later Miami has beaten New Orleans and then impressively whipped a strong Atlanta team, 101-92. Wade in those past two games has scored 52 points on lights-out 20-for-25 shooting. Asked what that says, James said last night, "It means Charles Barkley needs to shut up." Wade had pretty much said the same thing, but with his actions, not words. LeBron -- as good a teammate as he is a player -- may have meant that "shut up" to encompass the Heat's critics in general, all of the ones who cower as if the sky were falling with any defeat. Yes, Miami has defensive issues (being addressed) and, no, Wade, turning 31 next month, isn't as consistently explosive as he was a few years ago -- especially because he is not yet fully recovered from offseason knee surgery. But the past couple of redeeming games have reminded us anew that doubters shall dismiss the champion Heat -- and D-Wade -- at their own peril. It happened that Jay-Z and Beyonce and Floyd Mayweather Jr. were prominently among the Miami crowd the last game, a sign that this Heat team is built for the occasion and can rise up and put on a show when it needs to. For me, Miami continues the NBA favorite to repeat. And Wade, despite the occasional mortal night, continues an essential piston in the engine.
ON THE 12-12-12 BENEFIT CONCERT: A wonderful benefit, Sandy relief, and a starry lineup of acts. Thought it was mostly all good but the negative that stood out, for me, was that The Who and Kanye West were on stage for way, way too long. Get the hook!
GOLDEN FUMING OVER LATEST PLAYER ARREST: Cornerback Thomas Finnie's arrest in a campus laptop theft has left UM football coach Al Golden "very angry," we've been told by an associate who has spoken
to Golden since the arrest. "Al understands that you lose some kids early [to the NFL], but he doesn't get that you lose other guys because of dumba-- stuff like this," said the source. "It's just ridiculous. Anytime. But especially now." The Hurricanes, of course, await an NCAA Notice of Allegations at any moment in the Nevin Shapiro case. UM's institutional control over its athletes (or lack thereof) is part of the case, which is probably why Finnie (pictured) was immediately and indefinitely suspended. His UM career may be over. (Ever notice that "Finnie" and "finished" are almost the same word?) Dear UM Athletes: This is a particularly bad time to act like a dumba--. Yours is not a coach in the mood. Behave, please. Go to class and do not get arrested. Too much to ask?
GOODELL'S EMBARRASSMENT: This week's overturn of those Saints players suspensions in the Bountygate matter socks NFL commissioner Roger Goodell with a major embarrassment. It also would clearly seem to strengthen Jonathan Vilma's defamation suit against Goodell. This whole issue is a permanent stain on the commissioner's reputation and resume.
NFL PIX 'N FANTASY: Sort of positive news both ways... NFL predix: We went 11-5 overall and 8-6-2 against the spread last week, including an Upset of the Week bull's-eye with Vikings over Bears ("Aawwk!") and and other outright upset hit with Cowboys over Bengals. The two ties were a Packers push and Chargers-Steelers off the board when I played it. Greg's Lobos: My fantasy team ended a sad, 4-10 non-playoff season on the upbeat with a 98-88 win, though I had nobody top the critical 17 points I got from Andre Johnson Monday night. We'll get 'em next year. Well, probably not. But we'll say we will!
DOLPHINS' 2013 NO. 1 DRAFT PICK IS...: ... a Duck! Quack. Oregon defensive end Dion Jordan (pictured) will be the guy, according to ESPN's Todd McShay in his new Mock Draft 1.0, for what it's worth. McShay predicts Jordan goes to Miami 12th overall. I think Miami would prefer a receiver or cornerback but would look for a pass-rusher as the third option if no WR or CB of sufficient value is available.
Poll result: Starks, Hartline top Dolphins free agents fans most want back: We asked in a previous blogpost which of seven top Dolphins free agents-to-be you most want back, and the leaders were DT Randy Starks (26.6%), WR Brian Hartline (25.4) and CB Sean Smith (19.6). I was somewhat surprised RB Reggie Bush (13.5) and OT Jake Long (10.3) did not fare better. S Chris Clemons (2.7) and TE Anthony Fasano (2.0) trailed badly.
ON 1 HERALD PLAZA: Miami's historic preservation board voted 5-3 Monday to not designate the iconic Miami Herald building (pictured) as a protected landmark. That's too bad, but I say that mostly from a
sentimental perspective, I suppose. I spent many a year on the fifth floor of that place, back before laptops made "going to the office" largely counter-productive. I don't know whether the preservation-board's decision is right or wrong. But I know this: It isn't the vote of those five people that doomed this building and will see it demolished. That implosion was set in motion the moment the Herald's parent company, McClatchy, sold the building and property to Malaysian casino operator Genting as the newspaper prepared to downsize to a smaller building elsewhere. If there is any decrying going on, it must start with McClatchy's sale to Genting, the major domino that tipped and led to Monday's vote.
Click back. Will be updating/adding to this latest blogpost...
[IT IS WEDNESDAY, JULY 11: 1) Happy 73rd birthday yesterday to a musical hero of mine, Mavis Staples (pictured). 2) R.I.P., Ermes Effron Borgnino -- character actor Ernest Borgnine, gone at 95. His role in McHale's Navy (1962-66) is another one of my very early, vague-but-there childhood memories. 3) Tardily, I am now full on the Louis CK bandwagon. 4) Played golf Saturday for the first time since April at Sunrise and rediscovered that I stink. 5) Join us on Twitter @gregcote].
Heat on 'OTL': Thanks to ESPN's Outside The Lines for having us on yesterday to talk about how Dwight Howard's eventual landing spot might affect the Heat and rest of NBA.
HEAT LAND RASHARD LEWIS: With Ray Allen already in the fold, the Heat have now also signed free-agent Rashard Lewis, who is 6-10 but can pop from 3'sville and spread the floor. Like Allen, he took less to come here than he could have gotten elsewhere. Like Allen, he is past his prime but has life left in his career. Like Allen, he bolsters/improves the Heat bench. Smart signing.
NU-NU-NUDIO! GET YOUR NAKED ATHLETES RIGHT HERE!: On newsstands this Friday is ESPN The Magazine's fourth annual The Body issue, in which 27 athletes pose artfully naked -- which means you probably won't be offended unless you make a point in life of trying really hard to be. None of the athletes is associated with South Florida, so we miss a chance to relive the thrill of last year when Hanley Ramirez was pictured incongruously doing a domestic chore, his privates tastefully hidden by (yes) an ironing board. This year's cover photo is of Knicks' center Tyson Chandler (left), who hasn't been this naked since being dominated by LeBron James in the first round of the playoffs. The nudie at right is surfer Maya Gabeira. Not sure I consider surfing a sport, but think I am willing to make an exception after scrutinizing this photo. Note sure I consider The Mag's Body issue to be something pandering and silly or good and legit. Am sure I am not below pandering for blog hits by pimping it here.
BOXING VS. MIXED MARTIAL ARTS: Saw that the recent UFC 148 match between Anderson Silva and Chael Sonnen was billed as the circuit's biggest pay-per-view event of the year, which I took as a sign that mixed martial arts -- for all its undeniable (and increasing) popularity -- had not yet reached the mass appeal of boxing. My reasoning: A Floyd Mayweather Jr.-Manny Pacquiao bout would dwarf whatever UFC could throw out there in terms of PPV sales and national buzz. Am I wrong? Admittedly I'm not a huge fan of MMA, which I find cartoonishly violent. (I love baiting fans of the sport including my own two sons by making fun of the kicking, and pointing out that when I was growing up one of the big Guy Rules was that if you were involved in a fight, you didn't kick. "Because that's what girls did." MMA fans find this point neither amusing nor salient). Anyway, here's a poll just for fun, a boutique poll, meaning somewhat narrow interest, perhaps. If it moves you, vote and say why.
OK, THE HOME RUN DERBY WAS PRETTY GOOD...: Must admit Prince Fielder outslugging Jose Bautista for the Home Run Derby title last night made for pretty good TV. Kansas City fans were awfully rough on Robinson Cano -- and that's coming from a Yankee Hater. Sure would have been nice to see Giancarlo in there. ..... Original post: I'll admit I think I'm being parochial because Giancarlo Stanton's knee surgery erases the only Marlin from both tonight's HR Derby and Tuesday's ASG. I just don't look at the list of eight Derby guys and see much exciting. And an All-Star Game with nobody from your team feels like an anticlimax even before the first pitch. Anything else on TV tonight? Think I might find out.
Marlins deserve All-Star snub: Click on Star-Less for today's latest column by me. You want to be outraged that no Marlin was chosen to replace injured Giancarlo Stanton, but you can't, because nobody else has earned a spot on the stage. I write that the humbling all-star snub might be a good thing for a team that took its cocky cue from its manager but hasn't earned the swagger.
Baseball's second-half betting odds: From our friends at Bovada, Yankees (9-2) and Rangers (5-1) are World Series champ favorites, with Marlins 35-1, tied for 16th. In the NL it's Nationals and Giants both 9-2. In the NL East it's Nats 4-5, Braves 9-4, Mets 15-2, and Fish and Phillies both 12-1. Individual betting faves are: NL MVP--Pirates' Andrew McCutcheon (4-1); NL Cy Young--Mets' R.A. Dickey (13-10); AL MVP--Angels' Mike Trout (2-1); and AL Cy--Angels' Jered Weaver (5-2).
DOLPHINS: "WE'RE NO. 26! WE'RE...!": Ron Jaworski's Top 30 NFL quarterbacks countdown for ESPN slots Dolphins incumbent Matt Moore in at 26th. And most observers are betting David Garrard will beat him out for the starting job.
WIMBLEDON WINS: I generally like televised tennis as background noise but found the weekend's Wimbledon finals pretty compelling. Serena Williams' win was woman-against-girl stuff in terms of power. At her best Serena might be the greatest female player ever. If one could combine eras it's just hard to imagine dainty Chris Evert matching her game. On the men's side all of England cheered for Andy Murray but there also was something quite stirring about Roger Federer rising back to No. 1 after everyone had begun to spade dirt on a career supposedly fading. Good stuff, tennis!
A CIGAR STORY: I'm a cigar smoker (don't do it, kids), not a big-spending aficionado but a guy content with a $3 Arturo Fuente. On a recent trip to Oklahoma City I found myself back at my hotel at 1 a.m. craving a smoke so I traipsed to the convenience store next door for the closest they had to an actual cigar: a five-pack of Phillies Blunts. Insubstantial draw with a ghastly-sweet wrapper, every bit the cheap smoke you'd expect. But here was the worst part, noticed later in fine print on the carton: 'These cigars are predominantly natural tobacco with non-tobacco ingredients added.' Wha-huh!? What the hell else is in there? Cardboard? Mulch? Repurposed dock rope? Moral of story: A) Quit smoking, or B) at least leave the Blunts for the kids who hollow out the mostly-tobacco and replace it with pot.
SOUTH KOREAN DOMINANCE IS RUINING THE LPGA TOUR: Well, I guess that headline about sums up my feelings. Na Yeon Choi winning the U.S. Women's Open is great news in Seoul or Daejeon, but it's another death knell for pro women's golf in this country. Jingoist attitude? Absolutely. Also the truth.
PRESIDENT DROWNS ECONOMIC SORROWS IN BOOZE!: Evidence of U.S. presidents as real human beings is so rare that I feel the need to pass along this campaign-trail photo of President Barack Obama quaffing a beer. Notice it is not a bottled beer. Headline: PRESIDENT FAVORS REINSTATING DRAFT!
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[1) It is Saturday, May 12. Happy 108th birthday (on Friday), Salvador Dali. Am a big fan of the legendary surrealist painter (pictured left). If you haven't visited the Dali Museum in St. Petersburg, it's worth the trip. 2) Have you still not seen Kate Upton (right) perform the Cat Daddy? I would call it a minute well-spent. 3) The group People Who Have Not Seen 'The Avengers' meets tonight at the Waffle House. Corner booth. 4) Join us on Twitter @gregcote]
LeBron wins MVP, dog bites man: Reported yesterday that LeBron James will be announced today as NBA MVP, his third such title. Also being reported that the sun will rise tomorrow and that people, when looking at cute puppies, will continue to go, "Aww!" I'm not making fun (much), it's just that LeBron-as-MVP has been no-duh for, like, months.
Heat huge faves over Pacers, league: New bet-odds out from Bovada have Miami 6-5 for the NBA title, with San Antonio leapfrogging Oklahoma City for runnerup pick, 3-1 to 7-2. Heat a prohibitive 1-4 to win the East and a silly-lopsided 1-8 to win this Pacers series. The choice is Miami in five games, at 7-4. Scoring over/unders for this series are LeBron 27.5 points, Dwyane Wade 22.5 and Chris Bosh 16.5.
LITTLE PACERS LOSE THEIR MINDS, MAKE GIANT HEAT MAD: What passes as NBA playoff drama always interests me. An enraged Amare Stoudemire slicing his hand punching an arena fire-extinguisher -- we'll all agree that's real drama. What an opponent says, like the Pacers' yakking, isn't as dramatic but is hungrily embraced by Your Friend the Media, which has decided Miami-Indiana makes for an anticlimactic second round after Heat-Knicks and therefore needs whatever goose it can get. So Pacers center Roy Hibbert plays the obligatory "our team vs. their individuals" card, while mouthy Indiana coach Frank Vogel accuses Miami of being "the biggest flopping team in the NBA" -- as in faking fouls. Vogel, pictured rocking the Eddie Munster hairline, is not new to inflammatory comments. He said what's in the cartoon bubble about the Bulls earlier this season, but I present it here in the spirit of harmless media irresponsibility and civic repartee because I believe it is something Vogel privately thinks about LeBron James and Dwyane Wade. Less talky, more coachy, pal. Somebody needs to remind this guy he's "Frank Vogel." What Hibbert and Vogel said is not outrageous but is enough of a needle to provide added incentive for Miami, maybe an edge of anger. The little Pacers have nothing to lose as the underdog here, so they are banging pots and pans. It's sort of amusing. Cute, almost. OK, prediction time. I had Miami winning the last series in six games (instead of five), not anticipating three key Knicks injuries. I like Miami in five games over Indiana in the best-of-7 starting here on Sunday, with the Pacers lacking the offensive firepower to match the Heat. Your prediction goes here. Vote and say why.
Spoelstra wins vote of confidence: I asked, you answered. Is Erik Spoelstra the right coach to get the most out of the Big 3 Heat? It was 56.6 percent yes, 26.7% no and 16.7% undecided. Poll analysis: I'd call yays beating nays by a bettre tna 2-to-1 margin a fairly strong approval/confidence rating.
MURDER CHARGE IN VONTAE DAVIS' FAMILY: Michael W. Davis, 19, younger brother of Dolphins cornerback Vontae Davis and 49ers tight end Vernon davis, is charged with murder by Washington, D.C. police in the April death of Denver tourist Gary Dederichs in a hammer attack. The accused is undergoing psychiatric evaluations. Story here.
PART-TIME TENNIS STAR SERENA WILLIAMS INTROS RAP SONG: Serena Williams is releasing a new rap titled Cook The Track Up Like Frozen Pizza. Click HERE to sample. It's standard celeb-with-too-much-free-time-tries-to-rap fare, meaning nothing to worry Nicki Minaj but not altogether awful. Favorite line: "I can't see the haters through my Gucci glasses."
MARLINS BACK HOME, STAY HOT VS. NEW YORK MADOFFS: Off a rousing 8-1 trip out west, the Marlins return to the new ballpark last night to commence a weekend series vs. the NL East-rival New York Madoffs, winning to make it a scorching 9-1 run. NYM is two games ahead of Miami, so this is big. Competing Heat playoffs or not, will be disappointed if the three games don't draw around 100,000.
TIME MAG'S BREAST-FEED COVER: Just in time for Mother's Day (like that was a coincidence), Time's latest cover controversially shows a 3-year-old boy standing on a chair feeding at his mother's left teat as both stare placidly at the camera. I am not anti-breast-feeding at all, but here is my iron-clad, no-exceptions philosophy: If a child is old enough to talk, put that breast away. If your child is able to climb up on a chair and say, "Mommy, Judge Judy is over, that means it's time for my milk" ... that child might be too old to breast-feed. Where do you draw the line, moms? Where does it end? Son: "Ma, whip that [bleep] out, you're gonna make me late for school. And I've got FCATS today!"
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