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March 13, 2014

Sat pm 3-15: Rate Dolphins' free agency moves thus far. Poll. Vote; plus Heat crisis, Fins add 2 more FAs, Tiger's mistake, UM hoops & more

MARCH MADNESS HAIKU CHALLENGE!: It's coming. You cannot stop it. Our 9th annual March Madness Haiku Challenge returns as a generally unpopular yet stubbornly annual blog feature. Here comes your chance to out-haiku the competition and win a choice of really crappy prizes that I may or may not remember to send you. Watch for contest and entry details in our official MMHC blogpost coming Sunday!

1aa1aaskew1) It is SATURDAY, MARCH 15. R.I.P. Reuben Askew, 85 (pictured), Florida's great governor in 1971-79. 2) Patriots signing Darrelle Revis for one year. That's so Belichick! That's also smart. 3) !n The Previous Blogpost (ITPB): The Dolphins Strike Back, Ron Jeremy rum, Heat, ACC/Masters odds & more. 4) Follow us on Twitter @gregcote and also on Instagram, Vine and Facebook.

"NBA nickname jerseys. God what a dumb idea!" --Greg Cote

GRADE THE DOLPHINS' EARLY WORK IN FREE AGENCY: [Update: Dolphins yesterday signed veteran cornerback Cortland Finnegan, 30, who'll compete to start opposite Brent Grimes, and young guard Shelley Smith, 26, also a hoped-for starter]. I wrote an optimistic column on Tuesday -- click on Hopeful Days Are Here Again to read, and thanks for making it No. 1 most-read on miamiherald.com  -- on the Dolphins' start to free agency under new general 1aa1aalbertmanager Dennis Hickey. I'm not leading a Super Bowl chant or anything, but saying Miami is better than it was when the week began and that Hickey seems up to the task. A quick Dolphins free-agency scorecard so far: ADDED--Signed OT Branden Albert (pictured), DT Earl Mitchell, CB Cortland Finnegan, OG Shelley Smith and S Louis Delmas; re-signed CB Brent Grimes and DT Randy Starks. SUBTRACTED--Lost DT Paul Soliai and CB Nolan Carroll, traded OT Jonathan Martin and cut CB Dimitri Patterson. The Martin-to-Albert change at left tackle is alone such a huge upgrade at such an important position that it favorably flavors Miami's start to free agency. But that's just me. Your turn. Take a dip in our poll and tell the new GM Hickey how he's doing so far.

Status quo on projection for Dolphins' No. 1 draft pick: Mel Kiper Jr.'s latest Mock Draft is out and, for what it's worth, he still has Miami selecting Notre Dame tackle Zack Martin 19th overall. Makes sense. Martin would be starter-ready on the right side to bookend Branden Albert.

HEAT: DON'T LOOK UP BECAUSE THE SKY IS FALLING!: Last night's 111-107 home loss to sub-.500 Denver gives Miami five losses in its past six games entering Sunday's here vs. strong Houston. That is a lull permissable for most teams, but for the double-champion Heat it invites sky-is-falling scrutiny, judgement and doubt. It is the club's worst slump in just over three years. Notable: LeBron James is averaging a mortal 20.2 points in the six games since his epic 61-point night. The Heat right now is looking tired of or bored with the regular season. Time to panic?

Thank you, Heat, for this slump: In yesterday's latest column -- click on Miami Spice to read -- with tongue in cheek I write how this season has become so much more fun than last year because the championship is seen as in doubt, not inevitable. 

WHY TIGER LOST IN COURT: Tiger Woods lost a minor breach of contract suit against him in a Miami-Dade courtroom this week, stemming from a 2001 business deal. Considering Woods' past serial infidelity, I think the case may have been lost in voir dire. Note to Tiger's attorney: Maybe that all-woman jury wasn't such a great idea, after all.

CANES OUT OF POSTSEASON BID AFTER ACC EXIT: Canes men now 17-16 overall after Thursday's 67-58 loss to North Carolina State eliminated them in second round of ACC Tournament, and they'll have no more games. NC State was higher seeded but this was a disappointing exit, considering Miami had won at NC State 85-70 on March 1. UM did bit have the season (or RPI) to earn an NCAA or NIT bid. Canes beat lowly Virginia Tech 57-53 to open the tournament. UM women still hoping for an NIT bid.

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Greg,
I too share the optimism you write about in your most recent article. What a breath of fresh air and change from the work by that last guy.

excellent moves by Fins in free agency. bring back Patterson, get a guard & we'll call it good until the draft.

Jimbo,
You might be a chunk of years younger, but it looks like I can still climb to the top of the hill just a tad ahead of you;)

I am cautiously optimistic about Hickey's performance so far. The only stumbling block to significant improvement now is how Failbin performs. Not optimistic on that point.

UM at 17-15 shouldn't even be mentioned in a conversation about a postseason invitation. Better chance of winning the daily lottery today.

Glad to see the Truth still beating the Heats aS*.

damn OC, I was first.

Ross vs Jimbo. First of all, I understand this celebrity at the stadium posture. Considering I'm the classier guy, I'd bring in some of the former porn stars to make appearances at the game. Now, if I could persuade J-Lo to join in,,, put that sh*t on the big screen.

Regular season means absolutely nothing....in the playoffs the heat would shit all over the Nets and Paul Pierce' old ass...

Still up to no good in Inglewood.

Interesting info on Revis contract wondered why he signed one year deal but there is a 19.5 million club option attached to it for 2015 season. If New England keeps him they owe him a 12 million roster bonus and a 7.5 mil base salary. They are going to have a difficult decision to make next year if he has a good season. If they decline the option he can't be franchised. Sort of sucks he is in the division again but lets hope they release him after next year.

They aren't extending him the cap hit would be 25 mil for 2015. He will likely hit the market again next season.

so far so good on the free agent front...still a couple of more holes to fill...

Taking a look at the free agents still available to fill remaining holes (RT, Gs, Corner):

There are nine Tackles who are graded better than recently released Tyson Clabo. There doesn't seem to be a clear frontrunner, unless one assumes that someone like a Michael Oher or Saint's, Charles Brown could be converted into playing on the right side.

Here's the list of who is available to play RT, with some notes:

Charles Brown, NO, LT, age 26, $500k - why is this guy still available?
Jason Fox, Det, RT, age 25, $1.3M - ex Cane can't stay healthy
Andrew Gardener, Hou, RT, age 27 - originally drafted by the Dolphs
Marshall Newhouse, GB, LT, age 25
Michael Oher, Bal, LT, age 27, $3.78M
Dennis Roland, Cinci, RT, age 31
David Stewart, Ten, RT, age 31 - Ten raved about him, but too old, they said
J'Marcus Webb, Min, RT, age 25 - upside, but often injured
Eric Winston, Cards, RT, age 30, $5.5M - ouch! expensive

As for Guards, here are the players available who were graded better than John Jerry:

Shelley Smith, Rams, age 26 - visiting Dolphins as we speak!!
Eben Britton, Chi, age age 26
Paul McQuistan, Sea, age 30
Wade Smith, Hou, age 32, $2M - original Dolphin, oldest, most expensive.

If Hickey lands Shelley Smith, that would be a coup.

Nolan Carroll to the Eagles, not a bad third corner..we need to get Patterson back.

...and the Corners who ranked as good as, or better than recently cut, Demitri Patterson:

Terell Brown, SF
Tracy Porter, Oak
Captain Munnerlyn, Car
Dominique Rodgers-Cromartie

Fortunately, there is a large pool of Corners to sign from. I don't see this as pressing as the RT and two starting Guards the team will need.

Best Cromartie available. Munnerlyn is a good player none of the FA options would be cheap bringing Patterson back would be good but haven't heard one word about that possibility. I read that they are thinking of starting J. Taylor next season I didn't like reading that at all.

the Dolphins are interested in the free agent RT of the Saints but apparently the guy wants to go back to the Saints in the worse way..time to move on.

There are 23 Corners graded in the same class and between Patterson and Carroll. No need to panic on this one.

hold on, someone actually named their child Captain?..that is so cool.

Wade Smith is still in the NFL?...wow, he was picked by Wanny mustache many moons ago..

bottom line guys is there are slim pickings on the free agent front now, the Dolphins need to be patient and don't panic, usually there are a bunch of veterans that get let go in the summer, we should be able to land a couple of more veteran offensive linemen.

They need to land at least one more quality, starting guy for the O-line. The right side is currently a freeway.

If I were Hickey I would sign Shelley Smith in a NY minute. The guy is young, excels within a zone blocking scheme the Dolphins run and would be a starter.

This leaves just one G and a starting RT to fill. The Guard position is easier to fill, so I would NOT draft who all the experts say Miami should draft (Zack Martin from ND), no, I would draft Cyrus Kouandjio, from Alabama, and start him as RT. Let him get some NFL experience, while grooming him to anchor the left side once McKinnie retires. The dude IS 34, ya know.

OC..there was a report that Kouandjio failed the physical for a lot of the teams because of concerns about the knees..that is a big red flag.

Martin is a player, he would be my choice.

Zack Martin will be a Guard in the NFL, not a starting Tackle. The Dolphins have zero Tackles outside of McKinnie, who is 34. Assuming the team improves on their last record, they will not be drafting any starting LT prospects when the draft rolls around the following year either. At #19 in this year's draft, they can still draft a good enough project that would take over that LT position.

McKinnie is a free agent and there's no guarantee the Dolphins want him back.

they already have their LT for the next 4 yrs in Albert, am I missing something?

No, that was my bad. I meant outside of Albert. The team needs two Tackles, not one.

Guards are just easier to get, and I'm not sure I would be wasting a #19 on one of them.

" Miami had one of the worst run blocking OLs according to PFF."
and our pass blocking was better?
that's not a reason to not have run last year.
when miller got more than 10 carries a game he averaged 6 yards a carry.
when we committed to running last year, at least in a balanced way, we won.
PERIOD.
no revisionist history can change that..

Of course the Heat did the smart thing of losing last night to the Nets in respect to the East standings. No disrespect to the Bobcats, Wizards, or Hawks, but these teams would be feasted upon by the top 4 teams in the East. Avoid Brooklyn at all costs in the first round and Miami still has a great chance to coast to the Eastern Conference Finals. I honestly think Brooklyn or Chicago will be really tough outings. Miami must continue to play their style of defense and clamp down. Keep DWade healthy and Miami's chances of winning the East are magnified. Spoelstra knows what he is up against here. No one said winning a 3-peat was easy.

Hate to see Nolan Carrol go. A key component to Miami's D.

PERIOD! Libs use PERIOD like it is written in stone. You can keep your current health insurance, PERIOD. You can keep your doctor PERIOD. There is irrefutable evidence in global cooling, oops, warming, opps, climate change, oops, weather, PERIOD. Benghazi was caused by a you tube video PERIOD. Lamar Miller is the next OJ, PERIOD.

Posthumous, It's Nolan Carroll. PERIOD! Learn how to spell numbnutt.

Hey, hey, hey, I'm a Left Tackle, hey, hey, hey!

Bring back Ritchie! PERIOD!

Can you believe Bill stooped to the level of Liz Hurley? Your better than that Bill.

Big Baby- Only BB and the Pats could get Revis to take a 4mill. pay cut to sign with them. A future HOF cb to boot. Think about this for a minute. Revis says to himself, who will get me deep into the playoffs, and maybe to the SB? Only the Pats lose there best cb to fa, and get somebody better. Revis has to think, what division will I shine in. The jets,dolphins,and bills, have garbage QBs, and a bunch of nobodys catching the ball.6 games against a bunch of stiffs to make me shine.Just wait till wallace has to play 2 games against Revis. Can we say frustration!!! And tannahill, the guy will be lost against the Pats this season.

How is it revisionist to report FACTS? PFF ranked Miami 27th out of 32 teams for run blocking in 2013. It's not revisionist when it's a fact.

nice name, dick.
that sums it up, PERIOD.
tom?
i'm not questioning our line's run blocking efficiency.
it's revisionist because you're leaving out the PASS BLOCKING efficiency.
it was 14th.
why would guys inconsistently pass block to the middle of the pack, yet fail at consistent run blocking.
they didn't run enough to get any consistency.
no team will win today without a balanced attack, and that is not on ireland.
i GUARANTEE a more balanced attack next year, and greater success because of it.

well, there's always this for u ...

u win it and u might make the Top-120 ...

*********************** College Basketball Invitational ***********************

The College Basketball Invitational (CBI) is a men's college basketball tournament created in 2007 by The Gazelle Group. The inaugural tournament occurred after the conclusion of the 2007–08 men's college basketball regular season. The CBI selects 16 teams that are not selected for the NCAA Tournament or the National Invitation Tournament[1] (NIT). The CBI competes directly with the CollegeInsider.com Postseason Tournament (CIT) for teams.[2] From 2008 through 2010, teams competed on the home court of the higher-seeded team. Seeding was not included in the 2011 tournament and teams had to pay to play home games prior to the finals. The tournament is single elimination, until the final two teams are determined, and then the championship is determined by a best two-out-of-three format.


Suck my balls English Bob or should I say Dick. You dumb motherf*cker, global warming is real.

I've seen better looking stiffs at a morgue than the current crop of free agents this year. To say that there's not a single one that's worth a crap is an understatement.

The Dolphs sure better hope they have a good draft.

Vince Wilfork just asked the Patsys for release. Now that would be a signing.

Beware of a troll running around here using names such as Dick Chainy, Fat Albert, English 'fag' Bob, Jonathan Martinez and Hillary C. Trolls use different names to gain more attention so just ignore it and maybe it will go away. Period.

Ok then...thanks for the "troll" alert...

Good night ye all...

Well, closet fairy Martin said yesterday he is in a "happy place" now and looking forward to a new start, good for him..

I must say that Aponte ( BSB) and clueless Joe are doing a good job in free agency, keep up the good work.

Ted Ginn and his whole family to Arizona.

we were talking about running the ball. so now I'm a revisionist because I did not talk about pass blocking efficiency. dap i hate to tell you this but you're a dope. let's explore your convoluted logic. PFF rated Miami's run blocking efficiency as the 27th best in the league. that's 5 spots from the bottom. they also rated Miller as one of the worst RBs in the league for elusiveness (breaking tackles and eluding tackles). so let me get this, a bad run blocking OL and a 3rd tier RB and you wanted more running. i understand why you like ireland so much.....you're kindred spirits.

The Dolphins suck!

I must say that Aponte ( BSB) and clueless Joe are doing a good job in free agency, keep up the good work.

Posted by: FZB | March 14, 2014 at 06:49 AM

Maybe they are not as clueless as you think.

Tom...Philbin may indeed have a keen eye for evaluating players and spotting talent but my beef with him is not about that, its about how inept he is as a head coach, don't believe me?..take a looksie at how the team performed coming out of the bye week in the first Buffalo game and the last two games of the year.

Revis is a rental for one year. Losing Wilfork makes your team much worse. Not that impressed.

I would love to believe in Philbin but the way the Phins were ill-prepared and failed to show up with their final 2 meaningful games of the season was exceedingly scary.Makes you think if the SF Coach or Seattle Coach was the motivator....then things would have had a different outcome...(like 2 wins).Then again...that s the whole point and no way no how should Philbin ever be mentioned in the same sentence with those 2 Coaches.Seems even Schiano up at Tampa could have had the Phins better prepared.Now that s really saying something.Only a psychiatrist could answer in how Philbin laid those 2 golden eggs.

FZB

So Philbin gets zero credit for having his team prepared to beat Cincinnati, San Diego, New England, Indy, or Pitt? He just gets blamed for the team losing to the Jets and Bills. Hmmm....do the players share any of the blame?

Philbins did lose his team the last 2 games. I'll give you that. Philbin did pull his team together after a mid season slide & bullygate to win in Pitt & NE in back to back weeks. I call it a wash. Philbin should have learned a lot from last season and be smart enough to have "his" team ready. Philbin believes in a zone blocking offensive line & outside of Pouncey and a Clabo in decline, the rest of the squad was of the straight forward heavies type.

Rams G, Shelly Smith 26 is currently on Fins wish list. Smith is an athletic lineman and fits the scheme.
Washed up CB Finnegan is being considered by Miami. Finnegan was ranked 109 of 110 CB's last season. ouch.

Saints & RT Zach Strief haven't ironed out a deal & Fins are interested. Trading Sproles & freeing up $ looks like Saints are determined to keep him. Indications are Miami (everyone else too) like RT Strief... Strief wants to be paid, ain't no discount happening here.

Fins are also looking at 2 DB's, Thurmond of Seattle & 49r Tarell Brown.

Tom,
you beat me to the punch. I agree, where was the veteran leadership? You tell me that being down against Buffalo & Jets at halftime & none of the "leaders" put a foot in someone's butt? Maybe not,,,, with the team under the microscope, under investigation it's possible the leading players backed off.

Miami should bring in another vet CB in either Patterson or Thurmond. Sign G Smith & call it good. This would leave 2 starting roster spots for O Line & best player available in each round in the draft.

Greg I strongly agree with your salute to Reuben Askew.Askew was one of the great New South Governors of the 1960's and 70's and 80's like Jimmy Carter,Lamar Alexander,Terry Sanford and Bill Clinton who helped the region get out of the sad old Jim Crow days.The Dolphins get a B+ so far in free agency and if they get Shelley Smith that grade could go higher.Ross and Hickey showed the kind of class Don Shula would in trading Johnathan Martin to the 49ers.Martin will be joining his old College Coach and the area where he played in College.Free Agents will take note that a classier GM that knows how to treat Players better is at the helm compared to the *** Clown that was the previous GM.

Pay close attention here, Mayberd. You might actually learn something.

This guy just nails not only the failure of Obamacare but the fundamental failure with programs such as the Great Society.

He should get the Nobel Prize for Intelligence.


http://www.cnbc.com/id/101492996?__source=yahoo%7Cfinance%7Cheadline%7Cheadline%7Cstory&par=yahoo&doc=101492996%7CObamacare%27s%20problem:%20You

Revis Island lands in NE. Well, there they go again making another great decision while the Dolphs sit there with their finger up their ass. In fairness to the Fish why on earth would the best corner in the league want to play for the Miami Dolphins?

well I supposed that Reuben Askew did do some things right, however at this time I can't think of any..I'm sure if I start digging a bit I'll come up with something.

Tom...on Philbin and the players getting credit over victories over NE, Pitt's etc, of course that Philbin deserves the credit but way too many times last year his team was totally unprepared to play , from costly penalties, to an alarming inability to not make adjustments at any time during the game to playing uninspired football, that all falls on the head coach no matter how you want to spin it.

a lot of the players don't think much of him or his coaching staff, Barry Jackson wrote a few weeks ago that there's not a whole lot of teaching going on inside that building, when Jonathan Martin was having suicidal thoughts the Dolphins referred him to a shrink and Philbin never ever bothered to followed up on his player, he doesn't have a clue.

the absolute greatest trait a HC should have is leadership and Philbin's leadership qualities are non existing...

Well, i see it only took six hours and 49 minutes after midnight for FZB to post his first diatribe on how dumb Philbin is and how much a bitch Aponte. But not to be discouraged, he follows up with yet another such post an hour and 45 later and his third for the day just above.

Brother, estas de pinga!

Let me guess. You got an "F" in art.

FZ, Embrace "The Suck".........

oye..I was responding to Tommy-Son's comment on clueless Joe and the players, tranquilizate.

Barry Jackson is now reporting that the Saints tackle that we want is not even coming for a visit, bummer.

ps-and I haven't called D Aponte a bitch today, not yet anyways.

OC, besides the fact that Philbin's face bears a strong resemblance to your face and he's almost as anal as you are, what on earth do you find positive about his two years as the parking lot sweeper in Miami?

and oye...I haven't called Philbin dumb..just inept and clueless..

hehe

and you should also know, I'm a painter, mostly nature and landscapes...self taught also...yup.

I'm not a Philbin fan, Woods. I just didn't thing a that Ross and the team were better served by firing everyone and starting from scratch...yet again!

Kipping this fish at least keeps a chance to win within two years, instead of who knows when.

A new admin from top to down would have brought in: new philosophy on playing, on players needed, on playbook, etc.

I'm normally a patient guy. You know that. But in respect to the Dolphins only my driving remains more impatient.

forgive the typos, I'm on my phone with tiny little key hits.

OC, Dan Le Batard is reporting that Philbin has ordered all of the locker room attendants to start an orderly storage system consisting of an inventory system comprised of labels in color, lettering, numbers, and photographic details, to store all of the Dolphins equipment. Philbin apparently spent the first two months of the off season working on the new storage system and provided a tour for local reporters. When asked about the free agent market for 2014 Philbin replied, "Boys, everything is labeled in alphabetical order, numerical order, color coordination, and photographic detail. In addition we have barcoded every single box and affixed a GPS tag in order to maximize every square millimeter of our new warehouse space. This is the gold standard in stacking boxes in the entire league, and I am confident that it will be one of the main reasons why the Miami Dolphins will be attracting some of the best free agent talent available this year...."

Wow, what a nerd.

FZ,
Do any of your paintings show a campesino that looks like Philbin con una chiva that has the face of Aponte and a very handsome farm owner that looks like Ireland?

chit..the guy is picking up little papers from the fackin practice field !!!!, WTF is that about?

doesn't this guy look a little like Joey Philbin?..

http://whatculture.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/cr.jpg

hey, you just gave me the idea for my next painting.

I may just make a little love triangle between Ireland, the BSB and Joey...si..that could work.

dukey,
I'm just cracking up reading Greg's Haiku invite above..."and win a choice of really crappy prizes that I may or may not remember to send you."

hahahahaaha!!!!

OC, how would you know if that ass wipe sent you a prize? How the hell could you find it among all that crap that you put away?

oh OH, ..that hara-kiri chit again?

ok, here's my very first one, sure to be the winner so no use in even having the contest.

football season is gone
and the thrill is gone
nothing else to be done
so let's go home.

who's playing for second?

FZB you need to be more careful. You haven't called Aponte a bitch today...

I must say that Aponte ( BSB) and clueless Joe are doing a good job in free agency, keep up the good work.

Posted by: FZB | March 14, 2014 at 06:49 AM

Well technically I guess you are correct. You didn't call here a bitch, you called her a back stabbing bitch.

Let's take a close look at your theory that you posted above, OC;

"I'm not a Philbin fan, Woods. I just didn't thing a that Ross and the team were better served by firing everyone and starting from scratch...yet again!"

So, in recap let's compare that type of thinking with another, ahem, stiff that we currently are dealing with. So, are we to surmise that based on the "Starting from scratch yet again theory," that if you had a chance to start over again with anyone but Obi that you would give him another two years......?"

He he.

well technically the initials BSB could something else, like

B-beautiful
S-sincere
B-blond

and OC...I do recall you taking like almost a year to pack and paint like 3 1/2 walls..

Where's the Buick in that pic, OC?

tom, i've made a point to lay off the insults; i kindly suggest you do the same.
i am not a "dope" for suggesting, as many critics of this team have, that running the ball more with miller would've resulted in a more balanced attack, a couple more wins and a playoff berth.
i don't give a crap what miller's PFF rating for "elusiveness".
that's a bunch of garbage.
tannehill lead the league is sacks..
what was HIS elusiveness? lol..
oh, i see. perhaps other things might've contributed to that..
the FACT is, miller he averaged 4 yards a carry.
he ONLY averaged 10 carries a game.
WHEN HE GOT MORE THAN 10 CARRIES, HE GOT 60 YARDS AT LEAST.
whatever stat you're referring to is based on a variety of factors, and an incomplete evaluation as he was never really given the chance to consistently start OR produce.
in fact, the proof will be his the new GM deals with the running back situation.
miller will start next year, with possibly a new back up other than thomas.

meant to say...could mean something else..sorry

Dapper, don't worry, Philbin just hired Barry Switzer as Miami's Assistant Offensive Coach....

David...most people that know football understand that running the football is the most important element to an offense...if you can control the game that way your chances of winning the game increase dramatically...

everyone know that or almost anyone..hehe

thanks, FZB.
based on tom's logic, polian and every other critic that's said the same things i've said about miller and this team is a "dope".
must be an interesting way for tom to go through life..

FZB,
Three walls?
Dude, I had close to 30 years worth of crap in the place. You couldn't walk through the garage. I had stuff piled up all over in just about every room. I needed to clear each and every one of the rooms and toss/donate/store before redoing the particular room.

In the end it was well worth it, as I'm now like the little Monopoly guy collecting rent.

Feel free to scroll through the 19 or so pics:

http://www.homeseekers.com/rentals/CA/Mission-Viejo/92691/26832-Alexandrite-97797401

Tom- David just offered you an olive branch, take it.Back and forth friendly ribbing is fun, insults all around are not good.

dude, that's your pad?...not bad, not bad at all...so what you're saying is that the Wood's-ter was exaggerating just a tad?...hhhmmm, why am I not surprised..

FZ, you see the pic of the two story high living room? That's where OC had me come over to "hold the ladder" as the idiot, er, I mean the boy climbed up 20 feet on a wobbly ladder to "paint the top of the walls!"

"Oye, OC, WTF are you going to paint that for? It's a navajo white color that even if you painted it would look the same." "No, no, I think it will look better."

Fast forward two hours, and I'm standing there smoking a blunt while OC Wallenda is standing at the very end of the ladder 20 feet up in the air, comiendo mierda with a little brush and a paint can. Finally he comes down after "cutting in" the navajo, and I tell him it's break time. So I'm sitting outside drinking a beer under the patio cover and talking on the phone when the boy comes out and says "I just made a Jackson Pollock of the living room."

Brother, I walk in and the fool had gone up on the ladder by himself without me holding it and fell off 20 feet up in the air and let go of the paint can which exploded on the living room floor and power sprayed navajo all over the focking living room and dining room floor and walls. To say that I almost stroked out laughing would be the biggest understatement of all time.

Oye, why don't you post the picture of the "palomino leather couch." He he.

I designed and installed that built-in bookcase you see there. Pretty much everything including the floor tile throughout the first floor. Woody did help me lay the tile throughout, and also helped me paint the living room.

...that was a 5 gallon bucket, I might add.

were it not for the agility I still maintain from my days as a gymnast, I would have killed myself!

And had it not been for you 0.0 IQ you would never have gotten on the ladder comiendo mierda painting the wall........

it sounds like you guys had a blast, I still think it would have been cheaper if you would have gotten a couple of mejicanos and paid them like 50 dollars each..you would have finished a lot sooner..

of course you wouldn't have had as much fun..

I think that that one classic F/Up, along with the time that I was standing outside and cutting the last of the floor tile pieces with a Home Depot "ELECTRIC" table saw, -in a driving rain- protected only by a wind jostled umbrella, just so I could return it in time and not incur another half day charge, stand out as the most stupid things I've done.

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