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Ryan Braun's astounding naivete; plus D-Wade's ex, Marlins fast-forward, my vacation details (just for the halibut) & more

1) It is WEDNESDAY, JULY 24. The Royal Baby has been named Greg. OK, well that's what I heard. Alright, no I didn't. 3) In The Previous Blogpost (ITPB): Our Ultimate FavoriteTeam Poll; results below. 4) Follow us on Twitter (gregcote), Instagram (Upsetbird) and Vine (Greg Cote).

RYAN BRAUN'S ASTOUNDING NAIVETE: Brewers star and former Miami Hurricane Ryan Braun is suspended for the remaining 65 games of the MLB season without pay for steroids/PEDs, and I have a 1aa1braunfull column that you'd see by clicking on Permanent Stain. It is Braun's gall and naivete that get me as much as the cheating. The gall: "I realize now that I have made some mistakes." So, so easy to say after you are caught and find no wiggle room, no escape route-via-technicality available this time. The naivete: "I am glad to have this matter behind me once and for all." Is he kidding? Braun's sentence won't end. His purgatory has just begun. His Hall of Fame shot is over and his name is shamed permanently. The fraud is pictured.

1aa1crazyexD-WADE PAYS BIG FOR HIS FREEDOM: Heat star Dwyane Wade paid ex-wife Siohvaughn Funches a $5 million settlement to complete their long, acrimonious divorce -- to essentially disappear from his life -- the Chicago Sun-Times reported. She protested as pictured outside a Chicago courthouse last week. The settlement includes a mutal "non-disparage" agreement. That means Wade cannot pubicly call his ex-wife crazy like I can.

MARLINS ANNOUNCE IT IS NOW 2014: The Marlins called up outfield phenom-designates Christian Yelich and Jake Marisnick, who started in left and center last night in Colorado - Yelich with three hits in his big-league debut. To make room the club sent down slumping OF Marcell Ozuna (who continues a promising prospect) and 2B Derek Dietrich. I like the moves. Season is going nowhere, so fast-track the future.

CATCHING UP: THE 10 BIGGEST STORIES TO HAPPEN IN SPORTS WHILE I WAS AWAY: It was oddly liberating for me to be out at sea and largely disconnected from Internet service for much of 10 days. Here apparently is what I missed, from a Miami perspective, of course, as always: 1. Dolphins open camp: But, noticably, still-injured top draft pick Dion Jordan does not. 2. Canes open camp via ACC Media Days: QB Stephen Morris, UM could be very good if NCAA allows. 3. Heat waive Mike Miller: Champs used amnesty rule to waive popular gunner in money move. 4. Mickelson wins British Open: Lefty Phil bags his fifth major, keeping Tiger in major idle. 5. Marlins turn into Marlins again: A hot spurt, but now 37 straight scoreless innings (prior to two straight wins). 6. Mike Pouncey's hat: Dolphins center's lid reads FREE HERNANDEZ in support of ex-Pat turned accused murderer. (Seriously, Mike!?) 7. Mike Dee leaves Dolphins: Club prez bolts for similar post with San Diego Padres, with failed stadium-renovation deal a kick out the door. 8. FIU dumps top running back: Kedrick Rhodes kicked off team after arrest for discharging gun on campus. Dumb Athletes, Part 1,453,112. 9. Baseball's All-Star Break: Forget who won and don't care, but Marlins rookie Jose Fernandez pitched great. 10. Brit wins Tour de France: That would be Chris Froome. Or was he the only guy who didn't fail the drug test?

Poll result: 'Favorite Team' poll produces surprises, insanity: The timing of it skewed heavily in football's favor, and results reflected that. We asked you to name your favorite team, just one, and Hurricanes football beat the Dolphins by 35.6 percent to 25.8. That surprised me. This shocked me: FIU football (17.2%) beating the Heat (14.4%) for third place. That makes no sense. I tell you, I go away from the blog for one lousy week and y'all trash the place!   :)

1aa1fishmeWHAT I DID ON MY SUMMER VACATION: We and another couple did an Alaskan cruise (our second) out of Seattle aboard the Norwegian Pearl, which I believe was named in honor of Minnie Pearl. Anyone who tracks me on Twitter, Instagram and/or Vine likely already knows more than they'd care to about the vacation, so I'll limit this recap to the visual highlight, for me, which was the awesome sight of Glacier Bay, and and the personal highlight, which was halibut fishing, something I'd never done. Pictured: Me with some of the bounty. Very out-of-my-zone to be reeling in a stubborn 25-pound fish from depths of around 300 feet. Not enough to turn me into a devoted fisherman. But enough to make me ponder the thought. Anyway, I'm happy to be back.

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