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May 08, 2013

G2: Heat 115, Bulls 78. Champs strike back!; plus bizarre story behind Middle-Finger Lady, Lil Wayne, Dolphin threats, Charles Ramsey song & more

1) It is THURSDAY, MAY 9. The national group, People Who Feel Sorry For Jodi Arias, will be meeting tonight in that phone booth over there. Plenty of room. 2) Marlins closing off upper deck for some games to make crowds seem bigger. What a major inconvenience for the six fans who've been sitting up there! 3) In The Previous Blogpost (ITPB): Heat's Game 1 loss, Derrick Rose poll, the non-LeBron voter, Serena 'n Sloane, baseball awards odds. 4) Join us on Twitter @agregcote.

Click on Sense Of Order Restored for my column off last night's Heat's series-evening Game 2 rout.

1aa1jkpicWell I reckon this here photo from Wednesday's Game 2 pretty much shows how much Heat fans in general love Joakim Noah and how cute we think his adorable little hair-bun is!!!: (I can't be sure, but I think her middle finger might actually be lodged in Noah's right ear). Dear Joakim: We sure appreciative your constant sneering, whining and arm-flapping. We wish your hair-bun would catch on fire. Love, Miami.

[Postscript: Bizzare backstory to Middle-Finger Lady: She is Filomena Tobias, her daughter told the Sun-Sentinel today. Name ring a bell? Her wealthy husband Seth drowned in his Jupiter swimming poll in 2007. No foul-play was determined, but his four brothers sued Filomena in civil court claiming she drugged him and caused his drowning. The guy pictured with her fiance, the VP of an Atlanta wealth-management firm. The daughter said, "She's embarrassed [by the photo] but she's being a good sport. All she has to say is that people need to get a life." Here is The Herald's story].

1aa1midfingNews Mashup: What if the Heat's Middle-Finger Lady had been in Cleveland during Charles Ramsey's hero interview?: I believe this woman has found a possible new cottage industry as the Irate Lady who appears in all circumstances and situations angrily delivering da bird.

1aa1dwverWade strikes back in post-game attire: LeBron James had the crazy interview-session garb after Game 1, all floral and bird-y. Challenged, a sartorially splendid Dwyane Wade (pictured) struck back impressively last night with a shirt/light jacket combo that looked like it was the creation of Versace on hallucinogens.

G2: HEAT 115, BULLS 78; MIAMI EVENS SERIES 1-1: LeBron James' 19 points and Ray Allen's 21 off bench lead six Heat players in double figures as Miami win by the biggest margin in club playoff history and deals Chicago its worst playoff defeat. Brutal game. Nine technical fouls and second each leading to ejections of Bulls Joakim Noah and Taj Gibson. Headed to the Midwest now at 1-1 as speculation continues to swirl about a dramatic Game 3 return by Derrick Rose. Column off tonight's game should be posted soon. Original post: You can 1aa1bullsheatpartly blame the rest/rust factor for Monday's 93-86 Game 1 Heat loss that featured clanky 39.7 percent shooting and unusually disjointed defense. Or you can simply target the fact that Heat 3-point specialists 1aa1bullg2Shane Battier, Ray Allen and Mike Miller were a combined 4-for-15 beyond the arc. If each hit just one more 3, Miami wins. But I look to other stats that must be corrected tonight in what, realistically if not literally, is a must-win for Miami. Chicago outrebounded the Heat 46-32; that gap must narrow. Four Bulls had more boards than Chris Bosh. Step up, Bosh! And this: Dwyane Wade took zero free throws Monday, and LeBron James took fewer than either Nate Robinson or Jimmy Butler. That must change. Miami can't rely on making 3's so much that it concedes the paint. The Heat need a manlier, more aggressive mindset on both ends of the floor. They'll have it tonight. I see Miami -- team and fans -- showing up a lot better than in Game 1. They'd sure as hell better.

1aa1bullwayneJust to be annoying, Heat nemesis Lil Wayne hops on Bulls bandwagon: As if Miami didn't have enough incentive tonight to even this playoff series after dropping Monday's opener? Rapper Lil Wayne hates the Heat and shows it at every turn, including boasting on-stage that he'd had relations with Chris Bosh's wife. Here Wayne is pictured celebrating with Bulls players after Game 1, courtesy Bulls guard Rip Hamilton, who posted the pic on Instagram. Wayne, referencing Nate Robinson's 24-point second half, also Tweeted, Nate the Great! Somebody show this photo to LeBron James, Dwyane Wade and maybe especially Bosh. They play better angry.

ON DOLPHINS' THREATS, ROSS' ODDLY TIMED PHILANTHROPY: What a strange time for the very top of the Dolphins organization in the wake of its stadium-renovations defeat in Tallahassee. Two quick thoughts. On the Dolphins' threats: Club president Mike Dee, asked about team's long-term future in 1aa1deerossMiami, said ominously, "I wouldn't want to prognosticate what the future holds but it is clearly bleak." Hmm. My friend Danny Webster tells me "bleak" means "without hope or encouragement, depressing, dreary..." Is that really how the franchise wishes to portay the state of the franchise? That's dumb, and unnecessarily upsetting to customers (a.k.a. fans). That attitude is mindful of the kid who didn't get his way so he threatened to take his ball and go home. It also sounds like a defeatist attitude. Time to be grownups about this, Dolphins. (Dee is pictured with owner Stephen Ross, their smiles belying the bleakness all around them). On Ross' oddly timed philanthropy: Comes word this week that Ross, 73, has joined the Warren Buffett/Bill Gates initiative in which the wealthiest of the wealthy pledge to donate at least half their money to charity over time or posthumously. It's a billionaires philanthropy club, a wonderful thing. Good for Ross. But the timing only underlines how well he can afford to pay for the desired stadium renovations himself. Ross is pledging to give away more than $2 billion when it would take only a fraction of that to refurbish his stadium to a Super Bowl-attracting, future-assuring shine. Maybe the smart, pragmatic billionaire businessman should consider that whatever money he did spend would come back to him in increased franchise value. That, in turn, would help ensure the club's long-term future here beyond Ross' eventual death -- something he claims he wants. Do what made you a billionaire, Mr. Ross: Get it done. Meantime, enough with the threats about leaving. South Florida deserves better.

HEAT'S SPOELSTRA SECOND IN COACH VOTE: NBA yesterday announced Denver's George Karl was its 2012-13 coach of the year, with Miami's Erik Spoelstra finishing second. Not a surprise.

1aa1charlesr"DEAAAD GIVEAWAY!" THE MARVELOUS CHARLES RAMSEY: Ramsey (pictured) is the Cleveland neighbor-turned-hero who this week rescued those three young women who'd been held captive for 10 years. The crime was horrific. But Ramsey's description of his role in the rescue is exceptional. It is entertaining, even funny. Click HERE to watch and listen. Ramsey colorfully references McDonald's, eating ribs, salsa music and "big testicles." He ends by saying, "I knew something was wrong when a pretty little white girl runs into a black man's arms. Dead giveaway. DEAAAD GIVEAWAY!" In a later interview, Anderson Cooper asked Ramsey if he wanted a reward and he said, "I get a paycheck. Give the reward to the rescued women." Charles Ramsey, you're my hero. McDonald's, give this man free cheeseburgers for life! (Yes: I am aware Ramsey is an imperfect soul reportedly with domestic-violence arrests in his past. No: It does not diminish his role in this matter, or the fab interview he gave). In the spirit of celebrating Ramsey's role in this -- not making light of the crime -- we present two alternate versions of the interview:

* Charles Ramsey interview remix: Songified. (Grade: A-plus) 

* Charles Ramsey interview animated: Crazy Taiwanese Style. (Grade: B)

Poll results: Deeply divided on Derrick Rose drama: We asked, and 46.6 percent said the medically-cleared Bulls guard should be playing, but 45.2% supported his decision not to, and 8.2% were undecided.

UPDATED: MARLINS "SAD-O-METER" RETURNS! (UNFORTUNATELY): We have had this new blog feature we update as 1aa1bbsadlong as Marlins' winning percentage is under .300 -- as long as the New York Mets' infamous 1962 record of 40-120 (.250) is within reach. Well, the Sad-O-Meter disappeared for a little bit but three straight losses including yesterday's shutout in San Diego have brought it back. Updated Sad-O-Meter: Current record, 10-25 (.286). Season projection, 46.29 wins, 115.71 losses.

Click back. Will be updatingadding to this latest blogpost...

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