SURVIVING LAS VEGAS: Wife and I have returned to So Fla after 4 days/3 nights in Las Vegas on a recovery mission. By that I mean time to ourselves to recover our sanity in a continuing effort to survive having two male offspring ages 18 and 22 throwing parties at the house while we were away. Stayed at the Venetian. Drank a lot. Saw comedy shows by Ray Romano and Frank Caliendo. Ate great food. Drank a lot. Saw a bunch of nudity in Cirque de Solei's Zumanity. Saw Big Elvis (pictured). Kept net gambling losses under 1K. Drank a lot. How bad could it be? Postscript: Big Elvis is the perfect entertainer with his free, old-style show at the former Barbary Coast. He's huge and kitschy enough to amuse. But good enough as an impersonator to actually impress. Click on That's Alright Mama for a video taste. The trailer-parkers -- by which I mean chain-smoking, high-mileage, dirty-blonde white women in their 60s -- were swooning. Highly recommended.
DO HEAT HAVE A SHOT AT LEBRON JAMES?: Speculation swirls today over LeBron James supposedly having one foot out the door in Cleveland. Might Miami be a landing spot? The answer is some undetermined shade of maybe, which makes it a valid question. I find it tough to believe he'll stay in Cleveland. But could the egos of LeBron and Dwyane Wade (pictured) co-exist in Miami? Have your say. Take a dip in our poll. Asking not for what you hope happens but what you realistically think will.
[Update: New odds out today from BetUS.com on where LeBron ends up next season: It's Cavaliers 2/3; Bulls 2/1; Knicks 5/2; and then Heat and Nets tied at 15/1].
WHY CAN'T I HAVE A JOB...: ...like this. I'm just saying.
RONY SEIKALY, D.J.: So I'm in Las Vegas over the weekend and I see a billboard for Tao Beach promoting a May 30 appearance by DJ Rony Seikaly. Yes, the same guy. The longtime former Heat center. He's a club DJ now. See the photo at left. Or Google Tao Beach and Rony's name. Maybe he does weddings. Couldn't hurt to ask!
KIMBO SLICE, R.I.P: No, we'll let Miami's Kevin Ferguson live. It's his namesake, mixed martial arts fighter and clown Kimbo Slice, who needs to go away, please. His latest loss, Saturday in UFC 113, is the latest evidence that his phenomena has flared but now fades. Fast. The novelty has become passe'.
IMPORTANCE OF MARLINS-METS: Marlins host division-rival Mets in four-game series starting Thursday, and I'm thinking Florida must take at least three of four to alleviate some of the heat on manager Fredi Gonzalez. Anybody who thinks the pressure isn't on Fredi just because Jeffrey Loria says so publicly must have majored in gullibility in college.
TIGER'S NECK HURTS: Tiger Woods withdraws from tournament with a pain in his neck. There is a punchline there related to his having had 121 affairs. But some things I can't say even in a blog.
PERFECT GAME, PERFECT ENDING: Oakland's Dallas Braden pitches only the 19th perfect game in MLB history and the moral of the story apparently is that good things come to those who tell Alex Rodriguez to stick it. Before his perfecto Braden was best-known for getting in Rodriguez's face earlier this season when A-Rod ran across the pitcher's mound when heading back to the dugout -- breaking one of baseball's myriad "unwritten rules." It's one of the sillier unwritten rules, considering both teams share the mound, but you had to love the mouse standing up to the lion And now the mouse pitches a perfect game. God what a tortured metaphor.
THE LIST: PERFECT GAMES: There have been 19 perfect games pitched in MLB history. The five most recent:
May 9, 2010 Dallas Braden, A's
July 23, 2009 Mark Buehrle, White Sox
May 18, 2004 Randy Johnson, Diamondbacks
July 18, 1999 David Cone, Yankees
May 17, 1998 David Wells, Yankees