A hostage to Super Bowl Week, the blog returns! And all across the country, people who produce TV commercials have crawled back into their abyss, disregarded at best, scorned in some cases, seen as purveyors of nuisance time, and already pining for next Super Bowl Sunday, the one day they get to be something other than low man in the creative food chain. By the way, what it is about a Clydesdale befriending another animal that we love so much? I was in St. Louis a few years ago and visited the Clydesdale farm and my vivid memory is that one of the horses stood in his stall in a state of arousal and, well, use your imagination. Then double it.
The Saints-Colts Super Bowl was the most-watched program in American television history with 106.5 million viewers, exceeding the 106 million who watched the MASH farewell episode in 1983. However, Hawkeye Pierce is not happy and has demanded a recount.
DOLPHINS' 2011 ODDS: Bodog.com works fast. Its 2011 Super Bowl odds are out and the Colts are fravorites at 13-2, followed by the Chargers 8-1, Patriots and Saints 10-1, Steelers 11-1, and Cowboys, Packers and Vikings 12-1. In AFC East, after Pats, Jets check in at 25-1 and Dolphins are 45-1 -- tied for 20th overall. In other words, expectations for next season are modest, Miami.
THE CASE FOR DONTE STALLWORTH: Defrocked wide receiver Donte Stallworth (seen at left praying for another chance) is free after killing a Miami man with his car last year, settling with the victim's family to get only a wrist-slap sentence, then serving a season's NFL suspension. The Dolphins should look into him because he'd be cheap, he's in his physical prime (age 29) and presumably he'd be motivated to prove he has a career left. He can be a game-breaker when used right, having averaged 19.4 yards one season for the Saints and 19.1 another year for the Eagles. In only 60 career starts he has 32 TD catches. Is Stallworth the answer? Not totally. It shouldn't preclude the Dolphins from considering a WR in the draft or looking hard for a greater-impact guy in free agency. But Donte is worth considering as a part of an overall upgrade.
JIMMY JOHNSON FOR EXTENZE: We mentioned this is an earlier post but it is is too delicious not to reprise. Former UM and Dolphins coach-turned-Fox broadcaster Jimmy Johnson -- pictured right either clapping or indicating the size of something -- is the new spokesman for ExtenZe, the "male enhancement" pill. TV ads will begin airing this month. J.J. will be at the Daytona 500 romoting the ExtenZe No. 37 Ford. "I believe in using every performance edge you have," reveals Johnson. One of the ads has our man trumpeting, "I go long. So can you!" My question: What three words best capture the essence of this partnership: Johnson for ExtenZe? Or ExtenZe for Johnson?
CANDID CAMERA: Colleague David J. Neal snapped this one at the Super Bowl. I am either in the throes of concentration or nodding off into a power nap. Beside me are Susan Miller Degnan, Linda Robertson and Michelle Kaufman, with Dave Barry in the row behind.
MIAMI'S BIG WEEK: Super Bowl overnight ratings of 46.4 with a 68 share are the highest for the game since 1987. (So the network sends out an email with this headline: "CBS Sports' coverage of Super Bowl XLIV scores highest rating in 23 years." Dear CBS: It wasn't your coverage. It was the matchup. It was the game). That bookended a huge crowd and great ratings for the Pro Bowl game, too. That makes Miami as host look good. So did Sunday's absolutely gorgeous weather. Do not believe the teeth-gnashing about how this might have been our last time hosting. The NFL loves Miami, and should. No other city attracts the celebs and starpower. Miami will be right back in the mix -- stadium overhaul or not -- when the next site for 2015 is voted on.
THE U's FORGETTABLE WEEK: Bryant McKinnie, booted off the Pro Bowl team for bailing on practices. Michael Irvin, accused in a civil suit of a rape. Warren Sapp, arrested for domestic violence. Then, on the field, Reggie Wayne, hobbled and a nonfactor for Colts. Jeremy Shockey's TD catch and Jonathan Vilma's defense for the Saints offsets it somewhat, but all in all not a particularly proud week for the Canes. (And I wasn't even including UM's modestly judged signing-day bounty...)
DANCING JOCKEYS: Gulfstream Park has taught several of its jockeys to dance to help promote its racing season. I think it's working. Click on Dancing Jockeys for the video. Jockeys dancing are not as funny as midgets dancing or E-Trade babies talking, but still.
SNACK FOOD STADIUM: No, that is not the latest in the long line of names for Dolphin Stadium. It is a stadium replica made entirely of snack food. My question. Is it so detailed that the restrooms contain tiny little Tootsie rolls? I'm just asking!
Greg,
as someone on an earlier blog noted regarding jimmy johnson and his new venture, " i sure hope that toy poodle (snowball?) of his can run fast"!! you have some serious thinkers here, dear host.
jonathan vilma was superb calling the defensive plays for the saints. i am one who doesn't go for the commercials and enjoys radio. listening to the national broadcast of marv alberts/boomer esiason before getting out the sirius box for the 4th quarter of wwl courtesy (at 7 zops a month) of sirius, the announcers, especialy ole boom, were very hip that the saints were in proper position to defend against peyton manning's playcalling. the colts, as yours tuly had stated, are lacking of "personality"-read talent- as they draft so low each year for finishing atop their division. with the exception of reggie wayne, the rest of the colts' offensive players are solid but not spectacular- addai, garcon, even dallas clark; and on defense, they are small (even the stars: dwight freeney, gary brackett, and when he plays, bob sanders) and can't tackle. the saints "whipped" better teams in the vikings and cardinals. i am elated that the saints won, especially when many gave up on them at 10-0 early. it was a good game with what hollywood always wants (see "the player"): THE HAPPY ENDING.
Posted by: the shadow knows | February 09, 2010 at 10:36 AM
Great superbowl. My prayers were ansewered, colts beat jets, saints beat colts. We were spared the agony of 2 weeks of bullshit from the new york press, now we have payton falling on his face on the big stage. Let me see,Brady 14-4, manning 9-9, Brady 3 super bowl rings, the manning family 2 rings. I guess when they picked the all decade team at qb they picked gomer for the regular season, and Brady for the playoffs and super bowl.
Posted by: naplesjackpatsfan | February 09, 2010 at 10:44 AM
Cote- Maybe you can look into this for me, I understand that after the so called manning, colts coronation, bill polian was so pissed about the devestating loss he told the colts owner not to worry, he would petition the rules committe to outlaw the onside kick. So much for blowing off going for a perfect record, and focusing just on the super bowl. Truth be told, he was probably afraid his team could not take the pressure.
Posted by: naplesjackpatsfan | February 09, 2010 at 10:55 AM
I have to tell you guys something, watching jim caldwell on the side lines during the game, I never saw his lips move. He looked like a statue on the sidelines. In the second half he looked scared. I guess his oc, and dc, run the team.
Posted by: naplesjackpatsfan | February 09, 2010 at 11:00 AM
The game was won at the line of scrimmage. The Saint line put more pressure on Manning than the Colts line put on Brees. That was the difference in the game.
Posted by: Mort Rainey | February 09, 2010 at 11:21 AM
Yeah Colts Coach looked catatonic. It would have been amusing if it weren't so aggravating. I don't even have an emotional attachment to the Colts but even Camoron has looked more involved in game plans and games than this Shemp...
Posted by: r. duke | February 09, 2010 at 12:52 PM
Yup naplesjack I'll take a healthy Brady & Belichick over Easter Island Head and whoever their coach is any day.
Posted by: r. duke | February 09, 2010 at 12:54 PM
Donte Stallworth playing in Miami near the scene of his accident and close to the deceased, Mr. Reyes' family, wouldn't be appropriate in my eyes. I think the dolphins will pass on that scenario.
Agree on Miami's super bowl future. Forget the stadium facelift. The stadium's fine and the NFL will return to the Magic City either way.
Posted by: TheSergeantMajor | February 09, 2010 at 12:58 PM
RUN BUTTERCUP RUN BEFORE JJ GIVES YOU A SLEEPER HOLD AND YOU WAKE UP WITH A SORE ANUS!
Posted by: General Ripper, USAF | February 09, 2010 at 12:59 PM
Jimmy's been using ExtenZe on his hair for years.
Posted by: Iron Mike T | February 09, 2010 at 01:07 PM
sign stallworth!
Posted by: johnny | February 09, 2010 at 02:14 PM
I'll take Stallworth any day...over premadonna Marshall and always injured Boldin..
Posted by: sonny | February 09, 2010 at 02:52 PM
sonny- R U kidding me? Donte Stallworth isn't any better then Devon Bess and at what? 3 times the $ salary? Glad Parcells not Cameron running this team, which means, no, he ain't no Dolphin.
A better acquision then Brandon Marshall? ho ho hee hee, ain't that funny. Marshall is a physical presence and a true #1 WR, Stallworth couldn't catch a cold on former Patriots team with Brady, Moss, Welker, etc.... And... powerhouse Cleveland (minus Braaaa Edwards) thinks they are better off without him.
Don't sign Donte Stallworth.
Posted by: Jimbo | February 09, 2010 at 04:25 PM
THE U's FORGETTABLE WEEK:
I don't really see how McKinneys disappearance has ANY reflection on U of Miami. Irving has been away from the game as a player for a while and don't see the U in the picture either. The U has put so many top players in the NFL the last 2 decades, you can't expect all of them to be alter boys.
Posted by: Jimbo | February 09, 2010 at 04:35 PM
I hear Bill Polian is recommending to the rules committee that that the super bowl be played in an indoor stadium. That way there will be no chance of bad weather, or a cool breeze like payton and his poneys had to put up with sunday night. When you play a lot of your games in a climate controlled arena, to play outdoors on that nasty old real grass, puts them at a disadvantage.
Posted by: naplesjackpatsfan | February 09, 2010 at 05:27 PM
So you include Bryant McKinnie getting kicked off the Pro Bowl squad last Wednesday but not the Pro Bowl itself with a record 11 Miami Hurricanes last Saturday?
Yea, pretty shameful stuff.
And Irvin didn't do it.
Sapp probably did...
Posted by: Fil | February 09, 2010 at 06:51 PM
Greg Cote,
Youre a retard... There are so main better writers than you. You find the negative in everything... Youre a tool!
Don Estell
Posted by: DON ESTELL | February 09, 2010 at 09:54 PM
Back from Siberia. Yahoo.
jack if not for the phuck the raiders rule, the pats would have 2 SBs both of which were easily losable. hardly a dynasty. in any event the pats are history. next year 8-8 at best.
Dolphins on the way up will be waving bye to the pats on their way down.
Posted by: Tom | February 09, 2010 at 10:54 PM
Dolphins should NOT even look at Stallworth. It's been three years since he had a decent season. He signed a $35 million contract with cleveland, then proceeded to have 17 catches in 11 games. And let's not forget that by age 28, he had already played for 4 NFL teams. This guy is NOT a team player. He is a headache who is probably well past his prime. Miami is slowly building a great team, brining in this guy would be like bringing in TO. It's just stupid.
Posted by: Jim Hollander | February 09, 2010 at 11:24 PM
I posted a joke last night and the blog gestapo removed it this morning.
Posted by: Jimbo | February 10, 2010 at 07:17 AM
Cote, what is with you and your man love with criminals? Last year Vick and now Stallworth? Who wants to see these guys. The NFL is soft allowing these turds to play.
Posted by: klndry | February 10, 2010 at 07:21 AM
Stallworth is fifth option...and i don't think he should be in Miami after that tragedy.
Cote ask about Stoudamier!!!!! Anyone else want him???
Jimmy Johnson is a Miami guy...and don't all you miami guys have a preoccupation with your manparts???
UM's Shockey & Vilma are not some afterthought Cote!!! They led the way on the Super Bowl Champs...not sidenotes...they made huge plays at the end of the game to seal the win! The rest was bad of course for UM....the having double digit ProBowlers the week before was too good to let go without controversy for the U.
Posted by: Chris F. | February 10, 2010 at 08:12 AM
HE MADE A MISTAKE AND HE PAID FOR IT. I THINK HE WOULD DO WELL IN MIAMI AND WOULD BE A CHEAP PURCHASE. HE WITHOUT FAULTS. LET HIM CAST THE FIRST STONE. PROVERBS 3:6
Posted by: RICK THE TRUTH SPEAKER | February 10, 2010 at 08:21 AM
Greg,
If Jermaine Gresham at number 12 pick, Donte Stallworth would be an interesting signing. We keep talking about a #1 receiver, but a #1 TE, can also open the field up for Hartline, Bess, and possibly Stallworth. Can teh Dolphins actually move Ginn to DB [he played it at OSU], use him on return teams, and move Will Allen to FS.. I know, I'm reaching, but Gresham at 12, is teh play to opne the offense up, if healthy. I'm out!
Posted by: Gern2000 | February 10, 2010 at 09:12 AM
You should check out Lebatard's article where Bryant mckinney said he was sore like 20+ other players did to bail out of the probowl (but his agent didn't communicate this)... ooooohhh real bad!!
Irvin gets accused by a money hungry golddigger on a 3 year old account... ooooh nnooooo even worse!
Now Sapp, the jury is out on him, so if this is the only blip on the radar for bad reporting on UM these days, I'll take it...
Go a little further up north in Gainsville on the other hand, you can find plenty of law breaking there... get a grip cote
Posted by: HRod | February 10, 2010 at 10:21 AM
Tom- You and flipper-72 were talking all the same shit last year. Let me see if I have this right, 10-6, 7-9. Flipper was so distraught about your up and comming team, he went into the witness protection program. If I am not mistaken, you had them at 12-4. The sad thing is, your dolphins are looking up at, OH NO, the fu***ng jets. Just for the record Tom, when was it the last time the dolphins even had a sniff at a super bowl?
Posted by: naplesjackpatsfan | February 10, 2010 at 10:31 AM
RIP- Capt. Phill Harris, from the deadleast catch. Them cigarettes and coffee got you before the sea did.
Posted by: naplesjackpatsfan | February 10, 2010 at 03:05 PM
RICK truthfulness person.
I agree about letting Stallworth play his profession and second chances but.... the guy isn't any better then the talent already in Miami but making 3 X the $. Donte Stallworth is a very average WR who is a team problem and has obvious alcohol issues. Kill a man at 7am while intoxicated behind the wheel on alcohol and ILLEGAL drugs in his system,, you got major issues.
Posted by: Jimbo | February 10, 2010 at 04:34 PM
Ohhh cool Susan Miller has a BIG glass of Canes Kool Aid right next to her. She is drinking that stuff religiously.
Posted by: Random 2 Star Recruit | February 10, 2010 at 06:00 PM
jack why so defensive? And you did not have it right. I said 10-6. BFD. We had a ton of injuries that ruined our season. Our QB went down. Or best RB went down. We have no WRs. Things are getting better in Miami. Best part is the Pats are history. They were the beneficiaries of some of the worst officiating EVER. That phuck the Raiders rule call is a classic. What a freaking joke. Hey come to think of it, the Pats haven't won a thing since they can no longer cheat. Bottom line is Brady is no longer Brady and the Pats defense sucks the big one. Welker is done and there goes the offense. And forget those Jets. No one will be looking up at the Jets. They will implode. It's in their coach's genes. He can't help himself. Like father like son.
Just phucking with you jack.
Posted by: Tom | February 10, 2010 at 06:23 PM
Gern2000,
jermaine gresham was a TE in a spread offense, which probably translatesinto his being a less vicious blocker on runs. USC's TE, i think fred jackson is his name, played for a conventional offense that ran the ball and might be a better blocker. i believe that in the tony sparano scheme of things, i would say blocking is a high priority for a TE.
Posted by: the shadow knows | February 10, 2010 at 07:16 PM
Gern2000,
anthony mccoy, not fred jackson (i think he played a few years ago) mccoy, not a burner but really good hands, was listed at #4 in somebody's rankings, with hernandez the gator, gresham the sooner, and ed dickson of oregon ahead of him. all these guys played in spread offenses. #5 was from alabama (dollis?) and is probably a better blocker than any of the top three.
Posted by: the shadow knows | February 10, 2010 at 07:23 PM
horse racing fans,
A) we all know what unbelievable athletes jockeys are, even without the dancing. dr. robert kerlan, orthopedic specialist to the athletic stars, stated that lafitt pincay was the best specimen he had ever seen among the many, many athletes that he treated; charlie finley wanted pincay to play second base for the athletics at 5' 1", as pincay was a really good baseball player while a kid in panama.
B) no match races between rachel alexandra and zenyatta. match races favor speed and RA has way more than zenyatta. jerry moss is no dummy and isn't gonna sign his mare up for a speed contest with the way quicker RA. with a rabbit or two to tackle RA on the front end in adistance race, zenyatta has a big chance; let to run alone, RA would win by daylight.
Posted by: the shadow knows | February 10, 2010 at 07:31 PM
There’s a billboard along I-35 near Wyoming, MN, with a huge photo of former president George W. Bush that asks the question: "Miss Me Yet?"
http://minnesota.publicradio.org/collections/special/columns/news_cut/archive/2010/02/the_mystery_billboard.shtml
Obama and the Dems responded with their own billboard
http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_0O2CPGcOPk0/S3FjARnFKZI/AAAAAAAAFcE/jduBAqJF_aI/s1600-h/That's+A+Mean+'Ol+Billboard+On+I-35!.jpg
Posted by: Tom | February 10, 2010 at 09:42 PM
another joke that I posted was erased by ? My guess is who ever is overseeing us is uptight about jokes involving, hookers, vegas, trannys.
Posted by: Jimbo | February 10, 2010 at 11:20 PM
here's another.
CALMNESS IN OUR LIVES
I am passing this on to you because it definitely works, and we could all use a little more calmness in our lives By following simple advice heard on the Dr. Phil show, you too can find inner peace. Dr Phil proclaimed, "The way to achieve inner peace is to finish all the things you have started and have never finished."
So, I looked around my house to see all the things I started and hadn't finished, and before leaving the house this morning, I finished off a bottle of White Zinfandel, a bottle of Bailey's Irish Cream, a package of Oreos, the remainder of my old Prozac prescription, the rest of the cheesecake, some Doritos, and a box of chocolates.
You have no idea how freaking good I feel right now.
Posted by: Jimbo | February 10, 2010 at 11:22 PM
Tom,
funny, very good post pertaining to the billboards.
fact is the one of Bush in Minn that states "Miss Me Yet" is authentic. a group of small business owners fearing what has come down the pike from Washington (anti business) wishing their names ommitted paid for this advertisement. the second is a spoof of coarse.
Posted by: Jimbo | February 10, 2010 at 11:57 PM
Jimbo,
i am sure that dr. phil's sound medical advice got you a goog night's sleep. when you wake up in time for the NFL draft we'll chat!!
Posted by: the shadow knows | February 11, 2010 at 10:18 AM
Jimbo- You are right about the blog police. A week ago I tried to needled cote and his side kick lebetard, it got deleted. No profanity, nothing, they must have some toady watching things.
Posted by: naplesjackpatsfan | February 11, 2010 at 11:16 AM
As bad as Obama is, I will never miss Bush.
Posted by: Mort Rainey | February 11, 2010 at 02:41 PM
naplesJack,
I have posted far worse friend and it stayed. A couple of my comments - can't remember the topic- have been censored and canned 2. wtf??
I thought that we were given free reign to post practically anything outside of an obvious threat or such.
Posted by: Jimbo | February 11, 2010 at 04:35 PM
I still miss Ike
Posted by: Iron Mike T | February 11, 2010 at 06:17 PM
I miss Tina Turner
Posted by: Limp Pete | February 11, 2010 at 07:22 PM
Hey Pete, how'd you know that WAS the Ike I was talkin' about?
Posted by: Iron Mike T | February 11, 2010 at 08:36 PM
Too much over analysis on the game. Won at the line of scrimmage? Maybe it helped. But basically, two veteran superstar QB's simply lost their games to the Saints on bad throws late. First Favre, then Manning. I've come to terms that all those blown games by Marino just come with the territory .. they all screw up. Manning's throw was nothing short of pathetic for someone with his experience. While Favre could've easily run into FG range than make that idiot pass. But the fact that the Saints held their own and played tough is testament to their ability.
Posted by: mike1 | February 12, 2010 at 03:48 AM
Favre sucks Manning's a**.
Posted by: I'm just saying | February 12, 2010 at 11:59 AM
mike1,
right you are my friend about those throws. the saints were well-prepared and benefitted from the other teams' lapses- specifically the second half kickoff. from that moment the game turned, and the failed long FG giving the saints the ball close to midfield was another big play.
maybe favre and manning were too concerned with the league play, europa cup, and the FA cup all going on simultaneously. it is dizzying, but great.i think feb 25 has chelsea at ac milan, a veritable super bowl in itself.
Posted by: the shadow knows | February 12, 2010 at 03:00 PM
Ike would have been nothing without Vice-President Nixon & Checkers!
Posted by: I'd rather not say I'm in politics | February 13, 2010 at 05:09 PM