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Great expectations? Modest hopes? Weigh in, Dolfans: There is no NFL city more than Miami where expectations for the 2009 season vary so wildly. The experts are in near agreement that a healthy Tom Brady, coupled with the Dolphins' much-tougher schedule, makes New England the team to beat in the AFC East. The Las Vegas over/under on Miami wins is only eight, lowest of any 2008 playoff team. But Dolphin players -- notably LBs Joey Porter and Channing Crowder -- have taken umbrage and say the experts are wrong. Take a dip in our poll and let us know realistically why your expectations are where they are.
[Blogpoll commentary: MAN, you all are optimistic!]
Lakers win again, grab 2-0 lead: Won't be a 25-point blowout like Game 1 was, but I see L.A. winning at home again to put Team Van Gundy in a deep hole. And they did! It was 101-96 in OT. Magic had a chance to win it in regulation but Courtney Lee blew a layup of an alley-oop pass. Not discounting Orlando altogether from here, but still liking my pre-Finals pick of Lakers in 7.
Monday fantasy-baseball update: Adler's Marlsox sit in third place of 10 teams with 58 points, but it's a nnervous perch. A charging herd is right behind, with the next four teams all bunched between 57.5 and 55 points.
Jimmy Johnson stopped by airport security carrying monkey: But it was only a dream! Today's big Herald piece on Johnson (click Happy JJ to read) confirms it: Johnson has moved up the charts into second place, now trailing only laid-back icon Jimmy Buffett, on the list of people who have gotten the most mileage out of their carefree, happier-than-us, fishin' 'n flip-flops lifestyle.
Straight man looking forward to Tony Awards: Yes I am. I am looking forward to the Tony Awards for Broadway plays on TV tonight mainly to see if the Elton John musical Billy Elliot sweeps as expected. There. I said it, OK? By the way, who the hell is Tony!? I looked it up. Tony -- actually Toni -- was the nickname of a long-ago Denver actress, Antoinette Perry (pictured right as a child), who later was a successful producer and director in an era when women rarely had those roles. So why aren't they the Toni Awards? I think I'm starting to spend too much time thinking about this. [Thus concludes the single most non-sports item ever to appear in this blog].
Federer conquers clay, clay pigeon: Roger Federer today won his first French Open and tied Pete Sampras with a 14th career major, dispatching some guy who was ill-prepared to give him a decent match, as well as a loony fan (left) who ran onto the court thinking it would be a good idea to try to put a silly hat on Federer. Should we be beholden to that majors record, though, by saying Federer and Sampras or either are the greatest ever? I dunno but it doesn't quite feel like it to me. And in other tennis news...
Woman gives birth to two-set victory: In the French women's final between two Russians, all of that grunting made the match sound like childbirth. Either that or the throes of passion that lead to childbirth. I felt like a voyeur. How about a little modesty, women? Can't you strike a damned tennis ball without such an unladylike display of audible exertion? Imagine if we had that in other sports: Kobe Bryant releases a jumper with a superloud UNNNGHH! Hanley Ramirez swings at a curve with a blood-curdling AARRGGH!
Alex Rios video: Click here for what can happen when a fan says the wrong thing to a ballplayer the night after he went 0-for-5 with five strikeouts. Warning: F-bombs.
Red Wings' champagne on ice: Detroit up 3-2 over Penguins heading into Tuesday's Game 6 in Pittsburgh. Age taking Youth to school. Octupi ready!
Love,
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JJ isn't about time for you to get caught having relations with a waitress from HOOTERS... Bring Wannstadt along. He knows what he's doing. Isn't that what you tenderly whispered in Huiezenga's naive ear.
Posted by: r, duke | June 07, 2009 at 05:38 PM
boys,
this eldrick fella with the golf clubs is pretty good- didn't miss a fairway all weekend? yikes- back better than ever! scary
Posted by: the shadow knows | June 07, 2009 at 09:48 PM
Duke, maybe Ole porno star 'stash Wanny needed to whisper or tickle JJ ear.
Jimmy Johnson, Jimmy Buffett, 2 pot bellied douche bags I hope I never meet.
Let's talk Football.
Do you watch golf SHADOW? Isn't it like watching grass grow? Happy Gilmore & CaddyShack provided me with the only golf entertainment in this lifetime.
Posted by: Jimbo | June 07, 2009 at 10:54 PM
Jimbo I heard Wanny left numerous black & blue hickey marks all over JJ's mangams for getting him Dolphin HC job AND because he wanted to, after one too many Coronas.
Posted by: r. duke | June 07, 2009 at 11:32 PM
Jimbo,
my golf watching is limited to the last rounds of the majors whne el tigre is in the hunt. didn't watcha hole of yesterday's tournament- just knew that the guy was in his red shirt and close, and when i got back home and opened up the screen, there was the "news" that indeed tiger woods had broken the other golfers' hearts again on sunday. been following him since his youth in cypress, CA and he has never disappointed with the grace with which he handles being tiger. british open next, i believe, and he goes wild on those links courses
Posted by: the shadow knows | June 08, 2009 at 09:57 AM
Jimbo,
there is also a great w.c. fields short "the golfer" which is worth a look; also the honeymooners episode where ralph gets invited to play with his boss; norton reads the manual and it says "adress the ball'; NORTON: "Hello, ball"!!
Posted by: the shadow knows | June 08, 2009 at 10:09 AM
shadow,
Actually, the next tournament for Tiger will be the US Open. He is the current defending US Open champion, and also the defending champion of Bethpage, N.Y., the last time the US Open was played there in 2002. Good luck field!
Posted by: OC Dolphin | June 08, 2009 at 11:15 AM
OC Dolphin,
thanks for the correction; yes, it was in june last year that he won the US open at torrey pines near my former abode in la jolla
Posted by: the shadow knows | June 08, 2009 at 12:07 PM
Golf!?!? Twain had it right.
Four rounds is just too many. It allows a stinker of a round and still the capacity to win.
Charge a really high entry fee, shorten it to three rounds with making the cut being a single round endeavour, and allow crowd noise. Then you might have something interesting. A million dollars for hitting a little round ball for 4 days. Please.
Posted by: Good Walk Spoiled | June 08, 2009 at 01:43 PM
They should be able to use their golfclubs as weapons against each other too.
Posted by: r. duke | June 08, 2009 at 04:56 PM
JJohnson looks like a drunken gopher with those rosy red cheeks. Or a gay squirrel with some-one's nuts in his mouth.
Posted by: Jimbo | June 08, 2009 at 08:26 PM
shadow, i used to own a set of clubs and tried the sport at least 50 times. haven't played in 18 yrs. don't care for it very much. most of the appraisers i work with part time love the sport. couldn't watch it on tv.
tiger woods is one of the top pro athletes of our lifetime. very accomplished, can dominate to the point it isn't even a contest except for 2nd place on down.
WC Fields cracks me up. Showed him to my Sons on YouTube and they didn't get the humor.
Was also calling Jackie Chan... Charlie Chan, once again explaining it to the kids thru YouTube. They thought Charlie Chan, Fields, Stan and Ollie, WC were "lame"
Although they loved the "Stooges" more so with Curley than Curley (Gay) Joe, Shemp.
Posted by: Jimbo | June 08, 2009 at 08:34 PM
Jimbo,
the curly imposters qwere horrible; shemp howard was quite funny but not in the style of curly.
w.c. fields' movie "it's a gift" has some of the great bits of all-time, especially "mr. muckle", the blind man who come into the store-awesome fun!!
Posted by: the shadow knows | June 09, 2009 at 11:37 AM
shadow,
I'm pretty sure you remember this character from your days back in So Ca. Those of you who followed the "showtime" Lakers should also find this story somewhat interesting.
To be filed under: "Where are they now?"
http://www.ocregister.com/articles/lakers-barry-dancing-2451636-richards-game
Posted by: OC Dolphin | June 09, 2009 at 11:54 AM
Shemp was a wonderful alcoholic stooge...
Posted by: r. duke | June 09, 2009 at 02:27 PM
Good morning fellow Dolfans. Here is some news that will shock you. Adam Lambert announced in the new issue of Rolling Stone magazine that he is a gay American man. NO PHUCKING WAY. Adam is gay? Holy shit. I'm gobsmacked. The next thing you know I'm going to read that ginrai is a member of the Children of God.
Posted by: Tom | June 10, 2009 at 06:48 AM
Ginrai is off that Nebraska farm in Children of the Corn. Right Maliki
Posted by: Jimbo | June 10, 2009 at 11:12 PM