Who's the best local TV sportscaster? (with The Daily Poll) and much more
A whole new mess o' miscellania...
[Tuesday night bulletin: Dolphin Jason Taylor survived tonight and advances to next week's finals on 'Dancing With the Stars,' along with skater Kristi Yamaguchi and the guy with the fake arm injury whose name I can never remember. Eliminated: The chubby gal whose name I can never remember, either. In other entertainment news, if I never heard another note from David Archuleta, it wouldn't bother me].
[Tuesday night bulletin II: Feds re-indict Barry Bonds tonight on 14 counts of lying to a grand jury about using performance-enhancing drugs. Anybody still wondering why Barry is an unsigned free agent?].
Name the best South Florida TV sportscaster: Vote in our poll and drop a comment saying why you like who you do. Limited this poll to the regular on-air sports personalities for the Big Four stations serving Dade-Broward; the list is alphabetical with station channel number in parentheses:
[Poll note: Our poll format limits me to 10 answers and there are 11 local sportscasters. Sorry, Prim Siripipat of Channel 4. You got bounced because you are the newest of the group to our market].
Building a better NBA lottery system: Good column by colleague Israel Gutierrez today (click here) about the flaws in the NBA lottery system -- flaws that may well screw the Heat when the ping-pong balls fly a week from today. 
The whole idea of using ping-pong balls is ridiculous. Don't they know those are intended for beer pong? Might as well use tiddly winks or have the coaches of the worst teams vie for the No. 1 pick by playing Parcheesi. The real problem, of course, is that 14 teams (!) are in the running for the first pick including two that were .500 or better. Dumb. My solution: Limit the lottery to only teams that won fewer than 30 games. This year that would be seven teams. Then figure a way to weight it favoring the worst teams based on number of wins. In other words, a worst team with 15 wins (like Miami this season) would have a greater advantage than a year when the worst team has, say, 27 wins. There also should be a safeguard whereby the team with the worst record can never fall below the third overall pick. There. Next problem? How would you change the lottery system if at all?
F
ootballroom dancing: Is it just me, or does a season of Dancing With the Stars seem to last as long as an entire NFL season? Found it interesting they hauled out Dan Marino for the video pep-talk last night. The reason is that (sad truth) none of Jason Taylor's current Dolphin teammates -- not a single one -- is a big-enough star or sufficiently recognizable nationally to pull that off. Bill Parcells is, but Tuna recently was voted "Least Likely to Say Anything Nice About a Player Doing the Fox-Trot."
It's why the Internet was invented: Sexually explicit photos of French Olympic swimmer Laure Manaudou apparently have surfaced on the Internet in the wake of her breakup with Italian swimmer Luca Marin. I believe Olympic swimming would benefit from more scandals of this nature. Manaudou is pictured here being sexy during a meet, but not too sexy (barely) for a newspaper blog!
The new Mike Tyson?: His handlers are trying to makover Tyson's image. Good luck to them. Click here for today's column by me on this doomed transmogrification.
Martial artist departist: Cuban judo star competing in the Miami defects. Gee, now that was totally unexpected!
Mayo on the (unseemly) side: Basketball star O.J. Mayo took received cash via an agent while in high-school and at USC? Geez, will the shocking news never end!?
Goodell inserts head in sand: NFL commish Roger Goodell met three-plus hours this morning with Matt Walsh and then declared Spygate dead. Man, the stunners just keep on comin' don't they?
Countdown 5 Days: Finally, a reminder that this coming Monday May 19 I take over the paper's weekly sports columnist chat in the Q&A Forum, accepting the metaphoric baton from the sabbatical-ing Le Batard. It'll be live from 1-2 p.m. every Monday. Tap in. It beats working.
Mr Cote,
female swimmers have awesome bodies-lithe and lean and not overly muscled; plus, ALL THE LATEX IS ON THE OUTSIDE OF THEIR SKIN!!!
Posted by: the shadow knows | May 13, 2008 at 03:11 PM
I've never understood the convoluted machinations of the NBA draft. It's current form is just plain stupid. The worst team should ALWAYS select first and obtain the best incoming player. Period. In case of a win/loss record tie, settle it similar to football.
Posted by: OC Dolphin | May 13, 2008 at 04:00 PM
All of our local sportscasters blow, so I can't vote in your poll. Please add a "none of the above." At the very least, can we vote on worst sportscaster (Kim Bokamper)? I would much rather vote on local weather girls as we have had some real talent inaccurately forecasting our weather over the last few years. They were always right in as much as they were always wrong and I knew what the weather would be, as it was always the opposite of what they said.
Posted by: Cote = Blah Blah Blah | May 13, 2008 at 04:38 PM
All I know is (1) if the Heat somehow get the First pick in the NBA Lottery, then the system will be great. (2) If they get the Third or Fourth, you all will say the system sucks.
It's funny how Miami loves to change the rules - when they pertian to them!
Lastly, Cote - they use ping pong balls for the same reason the daily lottery and lotto uses them - it's simple and it's a statistics based system. I guess you need to have brains to figure that one out. Too bad for you, Cote.
Posted by: Kurt | May 13, 2008 at 06:38 PM
I'd be willing to bet that now that Kurt is posting it won't be long before Bostonian does. They always seem to show up together funny isn't it?
Posted by: Nuff Said | May 13, 2008 at 06:54 PM
Nuff Said, you're a dumbass.
Who the %uCK are YOU!!!!!!
Posted by: Kurt | May 13, 2008 at 07:39 PM
By the way, jerkoff, I've emailed Cote and asked him to simply list everyone's email address next to their names - he said they're working on it - then you'll finally get it and be able to figure out who is REALLY who, you sheep.
Posted by: Kurt | May 13, 2008 at 07:41 PM
The money bet is Nuff Said is TOM.
Longshot is Nuff Said is Flipper.
Wildcard is R Duke.
Why can't you just post under your own name, asswipe?
Posted by: Kurt | May 13, 2008 at 07:43 PM
Dancing w/stars: At least it doesn't run as long as baseball season. Go Jason & Edyta! Hope she wears the Phins colors again.
Swimming: Any sport would benefit from such photos. Didn't Curling have a photo shoot?
Tyson: Does he still have ear stuck in between his teeth?
Spygate: I don't believe it. Cheating is addictive. You do it once and succeed, you don't stop. Students cheat more and more til they get caught. Probably the evidence just doesn't exist anympre.
NBA lottery: Teams have rested good players near season's end to get the #1 pick or position themselves better. In NFL, 1 player makes less of a difference on the field (22 players) compared to basketball, 1 among 5. You can't compare the two sports. I think the idea behind the system is fine, just need to weigh the bottom end higher perhaps. Or, I'm ok with maybe just the bottom 5 - 7 teams having a shot.
Posted by: mike1 | May 13, 2008 at 08:17 PM
best sports caster? Carrot top or Flower top, pick one.
Current NBA draft does need to be more like NFL..
Kurt- I aint no Heat fan either, so my comment isn't tainted with bias.
Nope, I ain't nuff said either.
Posted by: Jimbo | May 13, 2008 at 08:47 PM
Sorry Flipper, Looks like spygate is going away.
Posted by: Noel | May 13, 2008 at 11:35 PM
So, do you care how one regular sees you? Well, for whatever it's worth, here's OC’s 2¢'s worth.
First, I should say that our host receives favorable marks for sponsoring this format and keeping the topics fresh, fun and engaging. But enough already,
Here it goes:
Al Coholic - See Jimbo
Bruce - Good humor as demonstrated by the stuff you did with the Godfather. Good arguments, just wish you would contribute more.
Dave in VA - Berp! Dude, thanks for the hospitality, pics and all. Keep up the good work, but confess, the YouTube stuff is accredited and thanks to your teenagers - right?
David Tucker - Fellow bloggers do like your stuff. As with Bruce, would like to see you post more often.
dean - Your dissension from all things Miami continue to be your M O. You do manage to keep it civil and more importantly, creative.
George Takei - See comments under your real name.
Grandma and the bus - See comments under your real name.
Flipper72- Mr. hardcore Dolphins' fan. Keep defending and standing by our team. Your support and staunch support for our team is something any other city's fan would love to have.
Jimbo - Top level sports reasoning, and a sense of humor to boot. Really look forward to reading your stuff. Keep it ALL up. Tell Franco that I still have stored size 11 1/2 maroon and beige 6" disco heels in primo shape. If he cares to borrow.
Jose Can-Snich-o - Would only like to see you post more often. You always seem to post some good sh**!
Kurt - Everyone is not an enemy. I think you will find that the level of respect you receive by-way-of your views will be proportional to the respect you initiate toward others. We've all been among buds in a stadium or at a friend's house, with another team's fan. We all cheer our respective ways and still manage to enjoy the company.
Mr. Woodcock - Where's the $20 you owe me?
Mike1 - Consistent topical poster. Good contributions. Only suggestion would be to venture more creatively.
Naples Jack, pats fan - Amiable coexistence amongst Florida team fans. Good stuff, good contributions.
N. J. John - Another great poster, AND creative! Your characters are classic! Great stuff dude, keep on keeping on. Shsss. I hear a wabbit.
Noel - Mr. Steady. I, and think others, would welcome POV’s you feel strongly about. Otherwise, just make sure you are not one of the last three surviving humans living in the world. That is you along with Tom and Cam Camaron.
Nuff Said - See comments under your real name.
Odor Eater - See comments under your real name.
raoul duke - When is your new book coming out? Great creative, and I might add, tolerant approach. A bit dark at times, somewhat rambling in a manner fitting someone experiencing a constant stream of conscience. High marks all around!
The Bostonian, et all - See comments made to Kurt.
Tom - You su**! Just kidding. I've really enjoyed, not just last year's Cam, and the Ginn and Family banter, but many of your learned posts. All props aside, I would enjoy nothing more than kicking your a** on the slopes or on the golf course.
the shadow knows - You're a pillar in this here blog friend. Always informative, appropriate, interesting and respectful. Keep-em coming!
Good night all. Love all your work!
Posted by: OC Dolphin | May 14, 2008 at 02:45 AM
Oscar_g and any others I might have overlooked. Rather late, and missing one here or there was inevitable. Will comment in the future.
Posted by: OC Dolphin | May 14, 2008 at 03:06 AM
Liberals have become even more hypersensitive than normal about any sort of criticism aimed at Barack Hussein (oops can't say that name) Obama. Now what could I do to really piss them off? Question his patriotism? Nah, it's not his patriotism I question (wink), it's his manhood. He's been a pussy his whole life and now Michelle runs the Obama roost. Trust me, I'm Barry's grandmother so I know. Plus, let's face it, Barry is a huge panzy, especially compared to John McCain. Hell, Barry's even a panzy compared to that gas-guzzling fat ass hypocritical redfaced tree hugger Al Bore. Heck, even most Democrats will admit that in a race between Hillary and Barry, the candidate that needs to "man-up" the most ain't Hillary. Right Michelle?
By the way, will someone please get a jack and get this freaking bus off of me?
Posted by: Grandma's still under the bus | May 14, 2008 at 08:01 AM
Will Manso looks like a character from the television show The Addams Family.
Posted by: Jose Can-snitch-o | May 14, 2008 at 08:47 AM
Jah, Vandma is big as ze bus! And usen's zay the Holocaust never happened! Just ask Her Farrakhan and Shorty running ze Iran. Obama agrees with us.
Posted by: Heinrich Himmler | May 14, 2008 at 12:26 PM
Kurt I only made it to the wildcard round? I'm clearly losing whatever touch I may have had. BAAAAAAAAAAAAA.
Posted by: raoul duke | May 14, 2008 at 12:41 PM
Kurt By the way I have absolutely no idea what you're talking about but it sounds full of intrigue.
Posted by: raoul duke | May 14, 2008 at 12:42 PM
Why thankyou OC. I'm hanging your critique on my refrigerator for all to see!
Posted by: raoul duke | May 14, 2008 at 12:44 PM
Heinrich how is the chicken farm in hell working out for you guy?
Posted by: raoul duke | May 14, 2008 at 12:49 PM
Buy the way Heinrich lose the spectacles. Poor eyesight is a sign of "veakness"!
Posted by: raoul duke | May 14, 2008 at 12:51 PM
One last obervation Herr Himmler. Love the SS/Deaths Head uniforms. Too bad NAZI's played for wrong team. I've often thought I'd like to see Fins in similar uniforms however intense Florida sun and heat wouldn't make them very practical I'm afraid...
Posted by: raoul duke | May 14, 2008 at 12:59 PM
Kurt
While in theory posting someone’s e-mail address may sound like a good idea, consider that with the resident dimwit or dimwits that frequent this blog, do you really want your address out there? They obviously have way to much time on their hands and I believe the last thing you would want is to be flooded with several hundred junk e-mails a day, only leaving your computer open to infection by damaging virus’s. I’m sure Cotes crew could come up with an identifying code, but it would require a lot of work that they more than likely feel wouldn’t be worth it. My suggestion to you is to do what I do and just walk away and ignore the dimwits posts, it’s difficult sometimes, but it does work. Responding only intensifies the bullshit.
OC Dolphin
Great job analyzing the blog members, could not have done better. A personal Thank You, you were way to kind.
Posted by: N.J. John | May 14, 2008 at 01:02 PM
The Ant and the Grasshopper
Two Different Versions, Two Different Morals
THE CLASSIC VERSION:
The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.
The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.
Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed.
The grasshopper has no food or shelter, so he dies out in the cold.
MORAL OF THE STORY: Be responsible for yourself.
…………………………….
THE MODERN VERSION:
The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.
The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.
Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while others are cold and starving.
CBS, NBC, PBS, CNN, and ABC show up to provide pictures of the shivering grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a table filled with food. America is stunned by the sharp contrast.
How can this be, that in a country of such wealth, this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so?
Kermit the Frog appears on Oprah with the grasshopper, and everybody cries when they sing, “It’s Not Easy Being Green.”
Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton are staging a demonstration in front of the ant’s house where the news stations film the groups singing, “We Shall Overcome.” They then have the group kneel down to pray to God for the grasshopper’s sake.
Nancy Pelosi & Barack Obama exclaim in an interview with Larry King that the ant has gotten rich off the back of the grasshopper, and both call for an immediate tax hike on the ant to make him pay his fair share.
Finally, the EEOC drafts the Economic Equity & Anti Grasshopper Act retroactive to the beginning of the summer.
The ant is fined for failing to hire a proportionate number of green bugs and, having nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the government.
Hillary gets her old law firm to represent the grasshopper in a defamation suit against the ant, and the case is tried before a panel of federal judges that Bill Clinton appointed from a list of single-parent welfare recipients.
The ant loses the case.
The story ends as we see the grasshopper finishing up the last bits of the ant’s food while the government house he is in, which just happens to be the ant’s old house, crumbles around him because he doesn’t maintain it.
The ant has disappeared in the snow.
The grasshopper is found dead in a drug related incident and the house, now abandoned, is taken over by a gang of spiders who terrorize the once peaceful neighborhood.
MORAL OF THE STORY: Be careful how you vote.
Posted by: Grandpa's at the wheel | May 14, 2008 at 01:02 PM
Steve Shapiro is an insufferabke egomaniac. I am thrilled to see JoeRose kicking his a$$. You should run a poll on the most annoying blowhards in local tv to see that jack a$$ take the prize. Him and Sid whatever his name from 790 the ticket. F both those a holes.
Posted by: Patriots cheat | May 14, 2008 at 01:14 PM
With Memorial day soon, thought you may enjoy this, let me know if you are not affected by it. Be sure to have your speakers turnehttp://www.costoffreedomtribute08.org/WeThankU.PPS?d19f1af8d on.
Posted by: N.J. John | May 14, 2008 at 01:34 PM
oc,
nice job. keep up the good work. i enjoy your posts as well.
- gearing up for the world series preview, marlins vs. devilrays! expecting twice the usual turnout. 10,000 paid! + another 50,000 dressed up as stadium seats.
- kudos to mr. cote. using the word transmogrification impressed the hell out of me.
- i think barry bonds would prosper in oakland, tampa or boston. he would also push any of these teams into the playoffs and greatly increase attendance in the first two.
- looking forward to red wings / penguins stanley cup. does anyone south of tampa, but me, have an incredible passion for nhl playoff hockey?
- who the hell is tila tequila?
Posted by: dean | May 14, 2008 at 01:46 PM
tila tequila = tila nguyen, bisexual hottie. close friend to hanna montana.
Posted by: OC Dolphin | May 14, 2008 at 02:00 PM
Grandpa's at the wheel. You sir/madamme are a true genius. Ever think of running for El Presidente offa these here "Aunited Astates"?
Posted by: raoul duke | May 14, 2008 at 02:06 PM
No disrespect with Madamme address. Hard to tell who is who and what is what at times on this blog. Wanted to give ladies benefit of the doubt causa thatsa whatta Iya learned atta a sensitivity training atta work.
Posted by: raoul duke | May 14, 2008 at 02:09 PM
Alright alittle present for all you gentlemen that adore lovely ladies. Look for "Sweet Eve" or "Eve Shine" same babe with different names. My God man as Mick Jagger once said, "She makes a grown man cry."
Posted by: raoul duke | May 14, 2008 at 02:15 PM
Be sure you're an adult boys and girls or get your parents permission before venturing to "Sweet Eve" or "Eve Shine".
Posted by: raoul duke | May 14, 2008 at 02:18 PM
Forgive me Lord for I No Not What I Done Just Like Roger Clemmons...
Posted by: raoul duke | May 14, 2008 at 02:21 PM
In fact I not know the proper usage of know just like Roger Clemmons without help from Coach Ernie Pantuso.
Posted by: raoul duke | May 14, 2008 at 02:23 PM
Thanks raoul, I'll be sure to hang your critique on my refrigerator for all to see.
Posted by: grandpa's at the wheel | May 14, 2008 at 02:33 PM
By the way, as much as I would like to take credit for that piece - I cannot. The piece was being circulated among a group of friends, both liberal and conservative.
Posted by: grandpa's at the wheel | May 14, 2008 at 04:07 PM
Anyone else happen to catch the CNN story about those Curious George "T"shirts?
Posted by: grandpa's at the wheel | May 14, 2008 at 05:35 PM
OC
Thank you OC, for even noticing my posts.
I usually post regular dolphin stuff since I have been a fan for a long time.
But, sometimes I feel I have to defend against intruders so I tend lose my objectivity and get into a confrontation.
Someone even called me a vigilante (hey, I like that!).
Your posts are one of the few that actually makes any sense to me so I appreciate that you even mentioned me.
Posted by: oscar_g | May 14, 2008 at 07:48 PM
My God man whoever said Taylor's dancing outfits are REALLY REALLY GAY was on the money. He looks like a flatulent Billy Zane. Do we really want him kind back on Fins? I mean were already mocked mercileesly for being loser wussies and he's not helping our cause AT ALL! I think Taylor is in the process of "changing"
Posted by: raoul duke | May 14, 2008 at 09:01 PM
Knock on my door, bitch and I'll answer, bitch!
Spygate is done! Flipper whore is wrong again!
Tom & Flipper are still the biggest idiots on the blog.
Posted by: the bostonian | May 14, 2008 at 09:03 PM
oscar_g is still a sad sac of shit!
Posted by: the bostonian | May 14, 2008 at 09:04 PM
N.J. John,
heh, nice to see you're still with us.
Posted by: the bostonian | May 14, 2008 at 09:07 PM
OC- Thanks for noticing my posts. I just love to talk NFL. football. Love my Patriots, Will go to my grave a diehard, like argueing with dolphin fans. Hate and detest jets, and there blowhard fans. They are the bottom of the barrel.Love sparring with flipper72. I think we are cut from the same cloth. Tom, yourself, jimbo,raoul, nj.john,dean,blue dave,ginrai,oscar_g, everyone else I missed, great fans to joust with. It makes this site fun to come to.
Posted by: naples jack,patsfan | May 14, 2008 at 09:12 PM
random thoughts from a very bored mind.
boobs and beer, anyone interested?
I heard Obama was in Michigan today. I guess hope is in the air, or is that a skunk?
If you guys are good tonight I'll give you my recipe for PolturduckenBostonian. (chicken, stuffed in a duck, stuffed in a turkey, stuffed in a polar bear, all packed tightly in a Bostonian's arse.)
If you have sex with a prostitute without her consent......is it rape or shoplifting?
IF Obama wins in November .. i'm gonna find a nice orbiting planetoid that i can sit on for the next couple of years and pick up the old Television of yesteryear.
What do you call three lesbians in a closet? A Licker cabinet
I heard today that Hillary said something like she is "ready to execute the office of President of the United States". Doesn't she have experience at that execution stuff?
Obama may be bad, but anyone who survived the Carter years really lived through torture in his own country.
John McCain was proud of his country...even as he was being tortured for over five years as a POW. Michelle Obama was never proud of her country...even as she was being pampered in Harvard for five years.
That's it. More later...maybe.
Posted by: Tom | May 14, 2008 at 09:48 PM
Tom, the comparison between Michelle Obama and John McCain experience is on the money. Gotta give it to you there! On the money!
Posted by: the bostonian | May 14, 2008 at 09:58 PM
What is this blow hole bostonian bellowing 'bout now. Some jive ass turkey and gravy crap without the fixen's. All hot air without saying anything.I outta take my 11" platform shoes along your backside.
Gotta get back to my workout on the total gym and buns of steel tape.
I'm Franco Harris for crying out loud, Jeeze!!
Posted by: Franco Harris | May 14, 2008 at 10:40 PM
Franco,
There's no "e" at the end of jeez! Also, it is not capitalized!
Posted by: the bostonian | May 14, 2008 at 11:00 PM
If the prostitute is ugly it's self-hatred.
Posted by: raoul duke | May 14, 2008 at 11:38 PM
Welcome bostonian, glad to see you're back correcting spelling and grammar. I can certainly use all the help I can get. Usually will try to keep Websters on hand but with 20/200 vision trying to see that small print is a pain in the a**. So what do you think of Jason Taylor's outfits? Gino Versace's or what? He is somewhere between Brian Boytano, Billy Zane and Jim Nabor's escort for the evening. It's embarrassing. No wonder Parcell's is disgusted. Sorry Flip Jason has been great player and likely still can be but oh those outfits look like they should have a zipper in the back.
Posted by: raoul duke | May 14, 2008 at 11:47 PM
Tom can you imagine Obama Hussein Po Pot Bin Laden as President? I'll move to f***ing Switzerland.
Posted by: raoul duke | May 14, 2008 at 11:50 PM