June 26, 2015

NO

Is Michael Jackson doing the moonwalk in these clouds during lightning storm?

(Thanks to The Amazing Steve, who says "That's clearly Fred Astaire.")

Posted by Dave on June 26, 2015 at 11:05 AM
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DEPARTMENT OF WAYS TO MAKE GOLF MORE ENTERTAINING

Trashed golfer gets head stuck in garbage can

Related: Man Sues, Says He Drank Beer With a Dead Rat Marinating Inside

(Thanks to Al Barkafski)

Posted by Dave on June 26, 2015 at 11:02 AM
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OOPS

Chinese outdoor advertising screen shows porn video

(Thanks to Al Barkafski)

Posted by Dave on June 26, 2015 at 11:00 AM
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SEND THIS SECURITY TO WASHINGTON

Politician is carried out of meeting by security because he wouldn't stop talking

(Thanks to Ralph)

Posted by Dave on June 26, 2015 at 10:59 AM
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FRANCE ETC.

Escaped Giant Rhea Bird Can Disembowel A Human With One Strike

(Thanks to Azaliah Yadinah-Parker and Charles Cates)

Posted by Dave on June 26, 2015 at 10:56 AM
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EW

Pee, not chlorine, causes red eyes from swimming pools

(Thanks to many people)

Posted by Dave on June 26, 2015 at 10:51 AM
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IF YOU SEE ONLY ONE UTTERLY INCOMPREHENSIBLE NORWEGIAN COMEDY VIDEO ABOUT POTATO CHIPS THIS YEAR

It might as well be this one.

Advisory: You will never get this 1:04 back.

(Thanks to Claire Martin)

Posted by Dave on June 26, 2015 at 10:49 AM
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HAR

A Guy Got Struck by Lightning Twice, and His Name Happens to Be Rod

(Thanks to Al Barkafski)

Speaking of names, here's one our strict policy prohibits us from linking to.

(Thanks to Unholy Slacker)

Update: We also cannot link to this.

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)

Posted by Dave on June 26, 2015 at 10:46 AM
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HEY, 'BAMBI' HAD SOME SCARY PARTS

Ohio Theater Accidentally Shows Horror Movie Instead of Disney Film

(Thanks to Al Barkafski)

Posted by Dave on June 26, 2015 at 10:43 AM
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HOW THE COUCH DEVELOPED FIVE TEETH WE'LL NEVER KNOW

Fake dentist in Texas arrested after pulling 5 teeth on Dallas woman’s couch

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)

Posted by Dave on June 26, 2015 at 10:32 AM
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NEGOTIATING STRATEGY OF THE WEEK SO FAR

A woman was arrested after allegedly biting a Macy’s employee in a Newark store because she was upset over the price of an item.

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)

Posted by Dave on June 26, 2015 at 10:26 AM
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June 25, 2015

TRUST US

Manure expo: Don’t miss a minute of the action

(Thanks to Unholy Slacker)

Posted by Dave on June 25, 2015 at 05:06 PM
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NAME THAT STATE

Thompson denied displaying a gun and told police the couple’s vehicle nearly crashed into him while leaving the Taco Bell lot, and he said Newcomb threw food at him when he pulled alongside the car to check on their well-being.

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)

Posted by Dave on June 25, 2015 at 04:19 PM
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ATTENTION, TRAVELERS

Rude hand gestures of the world

(Thanks to The Perts)

Posted by Dave on June 25, 2015 at 09:32 AM
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WHY ARE THEY EVEN ALLOWED IN THE WATER?

Stats Prove: Cows Take More US lives Than Sharks

Advisory: Autoplay.

(Thanks to Kevin Smith)

Posted by Dave on June 25, 2015 at 09:28 AM
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TOTALLY JUSTIFIED

A woman dialled 999 to call police from a hairdresser’s because her new haircut was “a mess”, one of Yorkshire’s four forces has revealed.

(Thanks to Ralph)

Posted by Dave on June 25, 2015 at 08:04 AM
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FLORIDAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Authorities say Tarpon Springs residents reported a loud bang at a home early Monday morning. The Tampa regional bomb squad was called in to investigate and found a hand grenade had detonated in the home's backyard.

(Thanks to Ralph)

Posted by Dave on June 25, 2015 at 08:02 AM
Permalink | Comments (8)

WHAT'S THAT SMELL?

Study ranks Tampa as America's sweatiest city

(Thanks to Rick Day)

Posted by Dave on June 25, 2015 at 07:57 AM
Permalink | Comments (5)

APOCALYPSE UPDATE

Shakespeare repackaged: Yolo Juliet.

(Thanks to Jon Harris)

Posted by Dave on June 25, 2015 at 07:54 AM
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MAKES TOTAL SENSE

Florida gun store owner wants to serve alcohol at Daytona Beach shooting range

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson, who asks "What could go wrong?")

Posted by Dave on June 25, 2015 at 07:53 AM
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WITHOUT THE INTERNET, WE NEVER WOULD HAVE KNOWN ABOUT THIS

Here’s a Guy Lip-Syncing to Marvin Gaye While Wearing a Giraffe Mask

 (Thanks to Steve K)

Posted by Dave on June 25, 2015 at 07:50 AM
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FRANCE ON HIGH ALERT

Investigation launched after Buddhists release non-native species of Canadian lobster and Dungeoness crab into the sea off Brighton

(Thanks to Charles Cates)

Related: New Hairy-Chested Crab Identified in Antarctic Hydrothermal Vents 

(Thanks to Horace LaBadie and Bill Hudgins)

Posted by Dave on June 25, 2015 at 07:44 AM
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EMAIL OF THE MORNING SO FAR

Hello Daveblog

It won't be even a month when you see an extra nice inch down there while standing in front of the mirror.

Posted by Dave on June 25, 2015 at 07:43 AM
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June 24, 2015

'TEENTECH' AWARD WINNERS

They want to create a condom that changes colour when it detects an STI.

(Thanks to Azaliah Yadinah-Parker)

Posted by Dave on June 24, 2015 at 03:03 PM
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NEW JERSEY WILDLIFE REPORT

This fish will eat your testicles, and it's swimming in a pond near you

This has been your New Jersey Wildlife Report.

(Thanks to Bruce Webster and Jan in Grimsby)

Posted by Dave on June 24, 2015 at 02:59 PM
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WE SAW THEM OPEN FOR THE TROGGS

Fatal Farts

(Thanks to Rick Day)

Posted by Dave on June 24, 2015 at 10:01 AM
Permalink | Comments (8)

AGED TO PERFECTION

Some 800 tonnes of smuggled frozen meat have been seized by Chinese authorities, including one batch dating from the 1970s, state media reported.

(Thanks to Jon Harris)

Posted by Dave on June 24, 2015 at 10:00 AM
Permalink | Comments (12)

MEANWHILE ABROAD

Women going gaga over 'Taiwan's hottest bean curd seller'

(Thanks to Allen at Division)

Posted by Dave on June 24, 2015 at 09:56 AM
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#GOFIGURE

#SummerInSyria social media campaign fails to take off

(Thanks to Allen at Division)

Posted by Dave on June 24, 2015 at 09:54 AM
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WAIT... WHO?

Florida man Dick Oranges bit a store employee and swung a knife at him during a confrontation over stolen clothing, police said.

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)

Posted by Dave on June 24, 2015 at 09:52 AM
Permalink | Comments (9)

SPEAKING OF BEER AND MANHOOD

Chemical in hoppy beer may cause man boobs and erectile dysfunction

(Thanks to Godot51)

Posted by Dave on June 24, 2015 at 09:51 AM
Permalink | Comments (9)

HOW A REAL MAN HIDES HIS BEER

This is how.

(Thanks to Ralph)

Posted by Dave on June 24, 2015 at 09:46 AM
Permalink | Comments (4)

THOSE TERRORIST BASTARDS

Chick-fil-A Customers Attacked by Birds

(Thanks to Ralph)

Posted by Dave on June 24, 2015 at 09:34 AM
Permalink | Comments (2)

IF THIS DOESN'T PROMOTE SEXUAL HEALTH, WE DON'T KNOW WHAT WILL

A nineteen-year-old in Norway has been hired by a sexual health charity to play a giant penis who surprises passers-by by spraying them with golden confetti.

295858a53bd38ff692edf8d813589d12700965a6e80642579b0557f0d94f90e2

(Thanks to Eric Y, Ralph and Azaliah Yadinah-Parker)

Posted by Dave on June 24, 2015 at 09:30 AM
Permalink | Comments (11)

NO S**T

Georgia workers win $2.2 million in 'devious defecator' case

(Thanks to Eric Y)

Posted by Dave on June 24, 2015 at 09:28 AM
Permalink | Comments (6)

OTHER THAN THAT, IT WAS A LOVELY AFFAIR

Groom arrested, bride treated for dehydration at rowdy wedding

(Thanks to Steve K and Al Barkafski)

Posted by Dave on June 24, 2015 at 09:23 AM
Permalink | Comments (6)

June 23, 2015

BECAUSE OF ALL THE LOST BRAIN CELLS

Listening To Heavy Metal May Actually Make You Calmer

(Rob Simbeck)

Posted by Dave on June 23, 2015 at 02:45 PM
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PREVIOUSLY HE 'DID A POO ON THE FLOOR OF HIS LOCAL COUNCIL OFFICES'

An angry dwarf impersonated a Dalek by sticking a sucker dart to his head and threatening to ‘exterminate’ two carers… before being tasered by a police.

(Thanks to funny man)

Posted by Dave on June 23, 2015 at 02:40 PM
Permalink | Comments (5)

CSI: CANADA

Winnipeg police sorry for 'X-rated' chopper talk overheard by public

(Thanks to funny man and Jan in Grimsby)

Posted by Dave on June 23, 2015 at 02:37 PM
Permalink | Comments (2)

NORWEGIAN GUYS IN ACTION

The man had filled a 200-litre hot water tank with gas in order to shoot kohlrabi, also known as German turnip, in his garden.

(Thanks to Not My Usual Alias)

Posted by Dave on June 23, 2015 at 01:29 PM
Permalink | Comments (7)

INCREDIBLY, THIS DID NOT WORK

Couple try to flag down Ryanair plane on airport runway

(Thanks to John Mayson)

Posted by Dave on June 23, 2015 at 12:27 PM
Permalink | Comments (4)

MYSTERIOUS ANCIENT STRUCTURE BAFFLES COMMUNITY

Fridgehenge

Screen Shot 2015-06-23 at 10.24.33 AM

(Thanks to Ralph)

Posted by Dave on June 23, 2015 at 10:25 AM
Permalink | Comments (14)

ONE BY ONE, WE ARE LOSING OUR BASIC CONSTITUTIONAL RIGHTS

LaPorte man arrested, accused of licking toad in restaurant parking lot

Richard+mullins

(Thanks to Ralph)

Posted by Dave on June 23, 2015 at 10:21 AM
Permalink | Comments (12)

FLORIDAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Super drunk Florida man arrested for posing like Superman without pants on, public urination

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)

Posted by Dave on June 23, 2015 at 10:18 AM
Permalink | Comments (7)

CELEBRITY UPDATE

Ryan Gosling Stands Up for Chickens in Letter to Costco

(Thanks to Kevin Smith)

Posted by Dave on June 23, 2015 at 10:16 AM
Permalink | Comments (7)

CANADIAN GUYS IN ACTION

Man rides moose.

(Thanks to Allen at Division)

We are thinking that beer may have been involved.

Posted by Dave on June 23, 2015 at 10:07 AM
Permalink | Comments (14)

FLORIDAAAAAAAA

Man, 90, threatened to blow postal worker’s head off

(Thanks to Horace LaBadie)

Posted by Dave on June 23, 2015 at 09:58 AM
Permalink | Comments (11)

WE SAW THEM OPEN FOR KANYE WEST

Notorious Invasive Worm Just Found in U.S.

(Thanks to wire"snoop"dogg)

Posted by Dave on June 23, 2015 at 09:55 AM
Permalink | Comments (7)

BRILLIANT

The man who owned the house that was slated for demolition is accused of changing the address numbers with the house next door.

(Thanks to Al Barkafski)

Posted by Dave on June 23, 2015 at 09:52 AM
Permalink | Comments (4)

DIAGNOSIS OF THE WEEK SO FAR

Rhabdomyolysis and bilateral peroneal and tibial neuropathies as a result of squatting in ‘skinny jeans’

(Thanks to Allen at Division and Bob Brogan)

Posted by Dave on June 23, 2015 at 09:50 AM
Permalink | Comments (7)

 
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