August 16, 2016

SALVATION AT THE RIO AIRPORT


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Posted by MiamiHerald on August 16, 2016 at 03:53 PM
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August 15, 2016

THE FINAL UPDATE FROM RIO

From The Blog, that is; we assume other people will be sending updates on actual, like, facts and stuff.

Posted by judi on August 15, 2016 at 01:48 PM
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August 14, 2016

UPDATE FROM RIO

Dong Dong, etc.

Posted by judi on August 14, 2016 at 02:42 PM
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WE SAW THEM OPEN FOR STRAWBERRY ALARM CLOCK

Dangerous Triangular Flapjacks

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)

Posted by judi on August 14, 2016 at 10:57 AM
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August 13, 2016

YET ANOTHER OLYMPIC COLUMN

...featuring beer.

Posted by Dave on August 13, 2016 at 05:50 PM
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August 12, 2016

UPDATE FROM RIO

The Blog reports from Copacabana

(Don't miss the video)

Posted by judi on August 12, 2016 at 05:42 PM
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WE SAW THEM OPEN FOR PHISH

Give it up for Manatee Mating Ball.

(Thanks to Steve Thompson)

Posted by judi on August 12, 2016 at 05:19 PM
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EXTREMELY QUICK CHANGE ARTIST?

Woman strips naked and tries on four different pairs of underwear in full view of other customers. Apparently the staff was busy.

(Thanks to W. von Papineau)

Posted by judi on August 12, 2016 at 04:58 PM
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FLORIDAAAAAA

Fighting crime one pizza-prank-call at a time.

(Thanks to Steve K.)

Posted by judi on August 12, 2016 at 04:31 PM
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BLAZING TOILET ROLLS

When you really need to make a runway.

(Thanks to Meg Breuer)

Posted by judi on August 12, 2016 at 04:27 PM
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August 11, 2016

UPDATE FROM RIO

Here I am with a member of the Brazilian Olympic flying team.

DB angel

Posted by Dave on August 11, 2016 at 09:46 AM
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August 10, 2016

UPDATES FROM RIO

Sorry about the lack of posting, but judi has been celebrating her birthday (it was yesterday) and I've been having trouble posting from Brazil. Assuming this goes through, here are my two most recent columns, on:

-- Volleyball and angry Brazilian Twitterers;

-- Cupping, gripping and the cheeseburger shortage.

Posted by Dave on August 10, 2016 at 05:21 PM
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August 08, 2016

CELEBRITY ENCOUNTER IN RIO

Olympics update

Posted by judi on August 8, 2016 at 05:01 PM
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BEER OF THE DAY

Image

Posted by judi on August 8, 2016 at 12:28 AM
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BILLBOARD OF THE DAY

In dog beers, I've only had one.

(If anyone knows what this is a billboard FOR, please post it in the comments. Thank you.)

Posted by judi on August 8, 2016 at 12:10 AM
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August 07, 2016

ADVISORY FROM RIO

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Posted by Dave on August 7, 2016 at 07:22 PM
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OLYMPIC FENCING

Here is a detailed report.

Posted by Dave on August 7, 2016 at 06:50 PM
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August 06, 2016

ALBUM COVER ART?

Rock bottom rock
(Please note that we at The Blog know how to use apostrophe's. And, commas. Also: Yes, ALBUM. Whippersnappers.)

(Thanks to Ken D.)

Posted by judi on August 6, 2016 at 02:09 PM
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IS IT OVER YET?

The Opening Ceremony

Posted by judi on August 6, 2016 at 12:21 PM
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FLORIDAA... OH WAIT, NO

Burglars tried to pawn stolen items at the same pawn shop where the victim works on Tuesday.

(Thanks to The Minx)

Posted by judi on August 6, 2016 at 12:11 PM
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SOON TO BE MAYOR OF A CITY IN FLORIDA

City of Fairfax Mayor Arrested in Meth-for-Sex Bust, Police Say

(Thanks to Jon Harris)

Posted by judi on August 6, 2016 at 12:07 PM
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August 05, 2016

HERE'S MY SECOND OLYMPICS COLUMN

Rio is great, if you can find the lobby

Posted by Dave on August 5, 2016 at 04:14 PM
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August 04, 2016

OLYMPICS UPDATE

Here you go.

Posted by Dave on August 4, 2016 at 02:57 PM
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OLYMPICS UPDATE

Here I am at the Rio airport with a Brazilian person wearing a traditional Brazilian costume.

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Posted by Dave on August 4, 2016 at 02:12 PM
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August 03, 2016

RIO BOUND

There has frankly not been enough stress in my life this summer, so I'm heading down to Brazil for the Olympics. Assuming I survive, I'll be writing columns from there, but I won't be blogging as much for the next couple of weeks. It is safe to assume, however, that (1) bad things will continue to happen, and (2) some of these things will involve squirrels.

Posted by Dave on August 3, 2016 at 05:15 PM
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'RADICAL WINE PRODUCERS'

Wine floods streets of French town after 'act of sabotage'

(Thanks to Le Petomane)

Posted by Dave on August 3, 2016 at 01:12 PM
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OTHER THAN THAT, IT WAS A LOVELY FUNERAL

The criminal complaint says, “in front of the casket, Troy lifted her dress and told Schweitzer to kiss her a**!”

(Thanks to Allen at Division)

Posted by Dave on August 3, 2016 at 01:10 PM
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COUPLE OF THE WEEK SO FAR

An argument that started over sloppy mango peeling ended up with an 84-year-old West Palm Beach husband stabbing his wife, city police said.

(Thanks to Le Petomane)

Posted by Dave on August 3, 2016 at 12:08 PM
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AMERICA'S GOT LOUSY AIM

While Ryan was performing one of his impressive sword-swallowing routines, AmberLynn accidentally shot him with a flaming arrow

(Thanks to Kevin Smith and Patty Villanova)

Posted by Dave on August 3, 2016 at 12:02 PM
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A FLORIDA PILOT'S LICENSE IS ON THE WAY

Stunt pilot lands small plane on moving truck

(Thanks to Bob Brogan)

Posted by Dave on August 3, 2016 at 12:00 PM
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AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Florida woman shoots self while using Snapchat, deputies say

(Thanks to Samuel Sprague and Ryan Tindall)

Posted by Dave on August 3, 2016 at 11:56 AM
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CANADA: A NATION GRIPPED BY FEAR

Ottawa cyclist survives serious goose attack

(Thanks to Al Barkafski)

Posted by Dave on August 3, 2016 at 11:55 AM
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FINALLY, SOMETHING IS GOING RIGHT

New Lucille Ball Statue Replacing "Scary Lucy" to Be Unveiled Saturday

(Thanks to Al Barkafski)

Posted by Dave on August 3, 2016 at 11:53 AM
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TELL US ABOUT IT

For biologists, few phenomena are as mysterious as the female orgasm.

(Thanks to timbang)

Posted by Dave on August 3, 2016 at 11:50 AM
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August 02, 2016

TOTALLY JUSTIFIED

The unemployed De Paola became incensed at his 51-year-old spouse due to her “using three slices of cheese in a grilled cheese sandwich.” De Paola told cops that he had told the victim she “could make a grilled cheese sandwich with two pieces of cheese instead of three.”

(Thanks to Le Petomane)

Posted by Dave on August 2, 2016 at 05:05 PM
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FOOLS. EVERYBODY KNOWS ARMAGEDDON WILL HAPPEN IN A CHUCK E. CHEESE.

Armed Men Clad in Body Armor Arrested at Walmart, Claim They Were Preparing for Armageddon

(Thanks to Steve K)

Posted by Dave on August 2, 2016 at 02:57 PM
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'HI, I MADE AN EXPERIMENT WITH MY BALLS'

A MAN covered his genitals with plaster in a bizarre experiment - and then desperately tried to break it off with power tools when he could not stand the heat.

(Thanks to funny man)

Posted by Dave on August 2, 2016 at 02:52 PM
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REMINDER: NEVER STEAL SOMEBODY'S LUNCH FROM THE OFFICE REFRIGERATOR

Man Has No Idea Why Former Coworker Blew Up His Home

(Thanks to funny man)

Posted by Dave on August 2, 2016 at 02:51 PM
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SHE'S PROBABLY DOING HER HAIR

Dutchman flies to China to see online girlfriend, lives in airport for 10 days waiting for her to show

(Thanks to funny man)

Posted by Dave on August 2, 2016 at 02:49 PM
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THEY ARE OPENLY MOCKING US

As of July of this year we squirrels (and our fellow animal operatives) have conducted over 1,400 unclassified operations that have resulted in aggregate of more than 67 days without power, affecting over 3.6 million people.

(Thanks to George Byars)

Posted by Dave on August 2, 2016 at 02:47 PM
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BLASPHEMY!

Medical benefits of dental floss unproven

(Thanks to oneblankspace)

Posted by Dave on August 2, 2016 at 02:44 PM
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73 MORE WEEKS OF WINTER

Groundhog Killed by Golf Cart During Police Golf Tournament

(Thanks to Jay Brandes)

Posted by Dave on August 2, 2016 at 02:42 PM
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WHAT'S THAT SMELL?

A poop-themed restaurant is about to break wind in Toronto

(Thanks to Rick Day)

Posted by Dave on August 2, 2016 at 02:40 PM
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RAISING AWARENESS

Male Cancer Awareness Campaign launches ‘SKYBALLS’ hot air balloon

(Thanks to Unholy Slacker)

Posted by Dave on August 2, 2016 at 02:37 PM
Permalink | Comments (2)

YOU KNOW WHO'S BEHIND THIS

Monkeys steal secret documents at Malacca army camp

No, not the Russians.

(Thanks to John Mayson and W. von Papineau)

Posted by Dave on August 2, 2016 at 02:35 PM
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ADVISORY

Nearly 100 domesticated ducks that officials say were illegally released in New Jersey are expected to be available for adoption early next week.

(Thanks to Le Petomane, who says "Surprisingly, most will be adopted by owners of Chinese restaurants.")

Posted by Dave on August 2, 2016 at 10:12 AM
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LAND OF EXCITEMENT

Norway’s Socialist Left Party has proposed a new national “slug hour”, which will see people in Norway hunt and destroy the invasive Spanish Slug.

(Thanks to Not My Usual Alias)

Posted by Dave on August 2, 2016 at 10:08 AM
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APOCALYPSE UPDATE

Baltimore County libraries to host 'National Coloring Book Day' event Tuesday

(Thanks to Nachum Hurvitz)

Posted by Dave on August 2, 2016 at 10:06 AM
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OBJECTION

Judge Outraged After Defendant Appears In Court Without Pants

(Thanks to Kevin Smith)

Posted by Dave on August 2, 2016 at 10:05 AM
Permalink | Comments (10)

WELCOME TO THE SUNSHINE STATE!

Florida man hits tourist with shovel

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)

Posted by Dave on August 2, 2016 at 09:47 AM
Permalink | Comments (5)

 
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