May 21, 2017

CANADA: THE TIME HAS COME FOR AN INTERNATIONAL INTERVENTION

Farting, peeing dinosaurs come to the Manitoba Museum

(Thanks to Ralph)

Posted by Dave on May 21, 2017 at 12:10 PM
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MEN (ALSO WOMEN):

Do not click here.

(Thanks to many people. Way too many people.)

Posted by Dave on May 21, 2017 at 12:06 PM
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IT CAN'T BE SAID OFTEN ENOUGH:

Don’t put ground up wasp nest in your vagina

(Thanks to Debbie in Den Haag)

Posted by Dave on May 21, 2017 at 12:03 PM
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'MISTER, ARE YOU AWARE THERE'S A BODY ON YOUR TRUNK?'

Couple drives 14 miles down an interstate without knowing there is a drunk man sleeping on the trunk

(Thanks to Patty Villanova)

Posted by Dave on May 21, 2017 at 11:56 AM
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May 20, 2017

TOTALLY JUSTIFIED

Woman charged for macing fast food employees over stale french fries

(Thanks to Jay Brandes)

Posted by Dave on May 20, 2017 at 06:33 PM
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CLEANUP ON AISLE SEVEN

Unsuspecting Wal-Mart customer takes down startled deer

(Thanks to Alan Dean)

Posted by Dave on May 20, 2017 at 06:21 PM
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WE'VE HAD GUESTS LIKE THAT

Incredible moment giant bull escapes Spanish fiesta and destroys family’s living room

(Thanks to Roberto)

Posted by Dave on May 20, 2017 at 06:15 PM
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THERE IS NOTHING LOWER

Sea Cucumbers Smugglers Busted With More than $17 Million Worth of the Delicacy

(Thanks to Andrew Mendez, Jay Brandes and The Perts)

Posted by Dave on May 20, 2017 at 06:06 PM
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CANADA'S CONTINUING DESCENT INTO CHAOS CONTINUES TO GO ON CONTINUING

Twice in the span of a few days, a large quantity of perogies, cabbage rolls and other baking from Ruf's co-owned Saskatchewan food processing business, In Good Taste, was stolen from their outside storage freezers, he said.

(Thanks to The Perts)

Posted by Dave on May 20, 2017 at 06:05 PM
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May 19, 2017

NOT WEIRD AT ALL!

Brazilian 'mermaids' ride quirky fashion wave

(Thanks to Le Petomane)

Posted by Dave on May 19, 2017 at 02:19 PM
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WHAT HAPPENS IN VEGAS

A tourist is suing a Las Vegas Strip hotel, claiming a life-sized mannequin in his darkened room caused him to flee and suffer injuries.

(Thanks to many people)

Posted by Dave on May 19, 2017 at 02:17 PM
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WHILE YOU WERE WATCHING 'GAME OF THRONES'

Photographer waited in a river nightly for 4 years to get this singular shot of a beaver

(Thanks to Alan Dean)

Posted by Dave on May 19, 2017 at 02:15 PM
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BUT WITHOUT THOSE, OUR BRAINS WOULDN'T OPERATE AT ALL

Journalists’ brains operate at below average due to excessive booze and caffeine: study

(Thanks to The Perts)

Posted by Dave on May 19, 2017 at 01:10 PM
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THE APOCALYPSE, THAT'S WHY

School Suddenly Finds Itself Covered In Dead Fish In Middle Of The Day – And No One Knows Why

(Thanks to Le Petomane)

Posted by Dave on May 19, 2017 at 01:09 PM
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HOLD OFF ON THAT CREDIT-CARD PAYMENT

The world’s going to end in a massive earthquake on May 31

(Thanks to Ralph)

Posted by Dave on May 19, 2017 at 06:29 AM
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SOUTH FLORIDA WILDLIFE REPORT

Woman lifts toilet bowl lid to find an iguana lounging in the commode

(Thanks to many people)

Posted by Dave on May 19, 2017 at 06:23 AM
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FOR ONLY $49.99!

If your dream is to dine in a darkened cafe surrounded by (domesticated) rats that you can "interact" with, then San Francisco has quite the opportunity for you.

(Thanks to Jay Brandes)

Related: Smart Thinking Saves Pet Rat After Heroin Overdose

(Thanks to James Flynn)

Posted by Dave on May 19, 2017 at 06:20 AM
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NAME THAT STATE!

Man defecates on search warrant after arrest

(Thanks to Larry Carnahan)

Posted by Dave on May 19, 2017 at 06:17 AM
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SMOOTH

A city man was drunk when he parked his car at the State Police Academy and got out to lie in the grass Wednesday afternoon, troopers said.

(Thanks to Bill Hudgins and DaninDallas)

Related: Texas man drunk texted officers, 911 to report bar that overserved him

(Thanks to Bobby Grawl)

Posted by Dave on May 19, 2017 at 06:11 AM
Permalink | Comments (3)

ISN'T THIS WHY WE HAVE WASHINGTON?

Out-of-work clowns must find 'real jobs' after Ringling Bros. folds

(Thanks to Not My Usual Alias)

Posted by Dave on May 19, 2017 at 06:03 AM
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STAY CLASSY, ADULTS

Adults brawl at high school graduation ceremony

(Thanks to Fabian Marson)

Posted by Dave on May 19, 2017 at 06:01 AM
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May 18, 2017

YOUR POINT?

This week, however, the town’s 31-member council overwhelmingly rejected the proposal on the grounds that if sexual intercourse should be subsidized, then so should many other personal activities, such as gardening or cleaning.

(Thanks to Le Petomane)

Posted by Dave on May 18, 2017 at 02:47 PM
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REMINDER TO MOTORISTS:

Always check the tide charts.

Witnesses said the man insisted on driving the vehicle away after it was towed, even though its lights were flashing and its engine was making strange sounds.

A Florida boating license is on the way.

(Thanks to Bill Hudgins)

Posted by Dave on May 18, 2017 at 02:16 PM
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INCREDIBLY, CARL HIAASEN DID NOT WRITE THIS

Feliciamae Farrington, 36, of Harvey, Louisiana, was naked in the living room of the home on Big Pine Key when Deputy Richard Wang arrived and looked in the window, sheriff's spokeswoman Becky Herrin said.

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson, Bill Hudgins and Allen at Division)

Posted by Dave on May 18, 2017 at 02:14 PM
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MANAGER OF THE WEEK SO FAR

Pizza Hut supervisor pepper-sprays employee after argument

(Thanks to Roberto, Patty Villanova and Jeff Meyerson)

Posted by Dave on May 18, 2017 at 02:11 PM
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NAME THAT STATE!

Putnam County man bit on tongue while trying to kiss rattlesnake, neighbor says

(Thanks to Rudy Prince, Layla and The Perts)

Related: Snakes Shut Down the Mail in a Kentucky Neighborhood

Autoplay.

(Thanks to The Perts)

Posted by Dave on May 18, 2017 at 06:11 AM
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WE SAW THEM OPEN FOR RANDY SPANISH SUPERSLUGS

Crazed otter bites and chases man back to his car in Scotland

You know who was behind this.

(Thanks to Janice Gelb)

Posted by Dave on May 18, 2017 at 06:07 AM
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SOMEBODY HAS TO DO IT

Erendira Vasquez Wallenda plans to dangle by her teeth from a helicopter as it flies over the American side of Niagara Falls.

(Thanks to The Perts)

Posted by Dave on May 18, 2017 at 06:03 AM
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MAYBE NEXT MOTHER'S DAY

The Chanel boomerang.

(Thanks to Jay Brandes)

Posted by Dave on May 18, 2017 at 05:59 AM
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THE NEWS FROM PHUKET

Randy Russian Tourists Only ‘Dirty Dancing’ In Back Of Tuk Tuk

Although reportedly there was some ta-ta flashing in the tuk tuk.

This has been The News From Phuket.

(Thanks to manual tomato)

Posted by Dave on May 18, 2017 at 05:57 AM
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May 17, 2017

UNDOUBTEDLY HEADED FOR FLORIDA

Drunk Driver Crashes into Heineken Offices

(Thanks to Le Petomane)

Posted by Dave on May 17, 2017 at 01:51 PM
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ART UPDATE

This is pretty great.

(Thanks to Clayton Carroll)

Posted by Dave on May 17, 2017 at 01:47 PM
Permalink | Comments (8)

FLORIDAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Woman with meth in bra reports buying drugs at Vero Beach yard sale

Key Quote: "I have to poop and I'm pregnant!"

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)

Posted by Dave on May 17, 2017 at 01:44 PM
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WE SAW THEM OPEN FOR THE CLASH

Randy Spanish superslugs measuring six inches in length are hitting Britain's gardens - and pellets won't kill them

(Thanks to Le Petomane) 

Related: Sex-starved Jeremy the lonely 'lefty' is in a tragic love triangle after his two mates leave him to procreate with each other

(Thanks to Jan in Grimsby)

Posted by Dave on May 17, 2017 at 01:41 PM
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SPORTS UPDATE

Someone threw a skinned duck onto the ice during Game 3 between Predators and Ducks

This has been your Sports Update.

(Thanks to Bill Hudgins)

Posted by Dave on May 17, 2017 at 01:37 PM
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WHO SAYS ROMANCE IS DEAD?

Not this blog.

(Thanks to Not My Usual Alias)

Posted by Dave on May 17, 2017 at 01:35 PM
Permalink | Comments (9)

WAR CLOUDS ARE GATHERING

Boar chases British ambassador in Austria

(Thanks to Le Petomane)

Posted by Dave on May 17, 2017 at 06:31 AM
Permalink | Comments (15)

BOLO

Leeds police hunt 'giant penis' costume man after assault

(Thanks to Jan in Grimsby)

Posted by Dave on May 17, 2017 at 06:29 AM
Permalink | Comments (15)

TIME FOR U.N. ACTION

A charity bookstore in Wales has more copies of The Da Vinci Code than it knows what to do with.

(Thanks to The Perts)

Posted by Dave on May 17, 2017 at 06:27 AM
Permalink | Comments (10)

SHE WAS RELEASED AFTER THE LIZARD PRODUCED A VALID FLORIDA LICENSE

Woman drove drunk with bearded dragon lizard in her bra, authorities say

(Thanks to Stan Ruth and Lisa Aschkenasy)

Posted by Dave on May 17, 2017 at 06:24 AM
Permalink | Comments (7)

PUKEKOHE TRAFFIC ADVISORY

The clown, from a nearby circus, had come loose in winds early on Wednesday morning and was blocking Mill Rd, one of the main roads into Pukekohe, a Fire Service spokesman said.

(Thanks to Ralph)

Posted by Dave on May 17, 2017 at 06:22 AM
Permalink | Comments (5)

SHE WON'T GET FAR WITHOUT MILK

Girl Scout leader on the lam after stealing $15,000 worth of cookies

(Thanks to PirateBoy and Le Petomane)

Posted by Dave on May 17, 2017 at 06:08 AM
Permalink | Comments (10)

THEY SEEM TO BE HITTING IT OFF

Austin man sues date for texting during movie

(Thanks to Janice Gelb, Rob Simbeck, Jim Kenaston and Layla)

Posted by Dave on May 17, 2017 at 06:01 AM
Permalink | Comments (8)

May 16, 2017

'ACCIDENTALLY'

A BBC reporter found himself attracting a lot of attention on social media after he accidentally grabbed a woman’s breast during a live broadcast.

(Thanks to Roberto)

Posted by Dave on May 16, 2017 at 05:09 PM
Permalink | Comments (9)

OOPS

A Union Station ad screen played PornHub videos Monday night

(Thanks to Stephan Smith)

Posted by Dave on May 16, 2017 at 05:04 PM
Permalink | Comments (10)

IT WAS RELEASED AFTER PRODUCING A VALID FLORIDA LICENSE

Police chase steer through Tennessee Waffle House parking lot

(Thanks to Bob Brogan)

Posted by Dave on May 16, 2017 at 03:48 PM
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THIIS IS A JOKE, RIGHT?

The RompHim

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson, who says "Hell no!") (Also thanks to James Flynn, who sent another version,)

Posted by Dave on May 16, 2017 at 03:45 PM
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FINE BY HER

Man threatened to shoot off his penis after argument with wife

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)

Posted by Dave on May 16, 2017 at 03:42 PM
Permalink | Comments (10)

THEY'RE WATCHING US

Lucy and I encountered this squirrel during our morning walk. The squirrel is trying to look cute and harmless, but Lucy and I were not fooled.

Squirrel

Posted by Dave on May 16, 2017 at 10:02 AM
Permalink | Comments (10)

APOCALYPSE UPDATE

A species of vulture has been filmed putting on make-up for the first time

(Thanks to Le Petomane)

Posted by Dave on May 16, 2017 at 06:05 AM
Permalink | Comments (17)

 
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