October 28, 2014

THIS HAPPENS FAR TOO OFTEN

Man dressed as yellow Teletubbie enters friend's house uninvited, takes Chinese food

(Thanks to Chuck Cody)

Posted by Dave on October 28, 2014 at 04:39 PM
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UNDOUBTEDLY FOR PERSONAL PROTECTION

TSA Finds Cannon Barrel In Checked Bag Of San Francisco-Bound Passenger

(Thanks to Gargoyle Socks)

Posted by Dave on October 28, 2014 at 04:33 PM
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BUT IT MIGHT GET YOU KILLED IN OTHER WAYS

Sex with 21 women lowers risk of prostate cancer, academics find

(Thanks to Unholy Slacker, Jon Harris and Greg Snow, who says "The only problem is, the 21 women are extremely booked up right now.")

Posted by Dave on October 28, 2014 at 04:26 PM
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RIIIIIIIIGHT

Kraft has responded to the controversy over its Jell-O Jigglers college team mold trays by saying it's not intended for college students to use in alcoholic Jell-O shots.

(Thanks to Janice Gelb)

Posted by Dave on October 28, 2014 at 10:08 AM
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IN THAT CASE, SIR, YOU ARE FREE TO GO

Naked Man Accused Of Raping Pit Bull In Neighbor’s Yard, Says ISIS Sent Him

(Thanks to Bill Jones)

Posted by Dave on October 28, 2014 at 09:05 AM
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THEN HOW DO YOU EXPLAIN HUGH HEFNER?

Reptiles That Wait for Sex Live Longer

(Thanks to Bill Hudgins)

Posted by Dave on October 28, 2014 at 09:02 AM
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IT'S THE MOST WONDERFUL TIME OF THE YEAR

Maine woman in Hello Kitty costume arrested for drunk driving

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)

Posted by Dave on October 28, 2014 at 08:59 AM
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IT'S HEAVY, BUT VERY HIGH-PITCHED, BREATHING

Bats Listen for the Sounds of Fly Sex

(Thanks to Peter Metrinko)

Posted by Dave on October 28, 2014 at 08:53 AM
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BE ADVISED:

Ancient Viruses Lurk In Frozen Caribou Poo

(Thanks to Gargoyle Socks)

Posted by Dave on October 28, 2014 at 08:51 AM
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A BOLD STRIDE FORWARD IN HALLOWEEN TECHNOLOGY

Baby-head masks.

Baby-head-masks-10830

(Thanks to Suzie Q. Wacvet)

Posted by Dave on October 28, 2014 at 08:49 AM
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CSI: HOUSTON

A Texas school district police officer has been charged with misdemeanor official oppression after he was accused of demanding to smell the socks and underwear of a woman he had stopped.

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)

Posted by Dave on October 28, 2014 at 08:47 AM
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WHAT COULD POSSIBLY GO WRONG?

Investigators say Jeffrey Stiles, 45, of Muskegon was attending a Halloween party and decided to step outside to try and scare drivers with his zombie costume.

(Thanks to Jim Kenaston, coscolo, Bill Hudgins and Focalpoint)

Posted by Dave on October 28, 2014 at 07:38 AM
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ATTENTION, NOBEL PRIZE JUDGES

The world's first magnetic bottle hanger for your refrigerator.

(Thanks to Stever)

Posted by Dave on October 28, 2014 at 07:35 AM
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THIS JUST IN

Tesco milk packaging leaves little to the imagination

(Thanks to Unholy Slacker and Robert Mathis)

Posted by Dave on October 28, 2014 at 07:33 AM
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October 27, 2014

GET THAT NOBEL PRIZE READY

The Suitsy.

(Thanks to Claire Martin)

Posted by Dave on October 27, 2014 at 06:02 PM
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THEY WILL STOP AT NOTHING IN THEIR QUEST FOR WORLD DOMINATION

Squirrel crawls into Grand Rapids Police patrol car

(Thanks to J.R.Absher)

Posted by Dave on October 27, 2014 at 11:44 AM
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HMM

Woman who had no idea she was pregnant gives birth at GP surgery after going to appointment for stomach ache

(Thanks to Jon Harris)

Ladies: Stories like this always strike this blog as highly improbable. Is it really possible to be nine months pregnant and not know it?

Posted by Dave on October 27, 2014 at 11:41 AM
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SEE IF YOU CAN GUESS THE GENDER

Friends dare each other to lick electric fly swatter

(Thanks to Focalpoint)

Posted by Dave on October 27, 2014 at 11:37 AM
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SOMEBODY IS GOING TO BE SLEEPING ON THE SOFA

Drunk Chinese man falls into container full of raw sewage on shortcut home from bar

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)

Posted by Dave on October 27, 2014 at 11:34 AM
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DADS:

Turn the sound up and watch this.

(Thanks to Claire Martin)

Posted by Dave on October 27, 2014 at 10:14 AM
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APOCALYPSE UPDATE, HALLOWEEN EDITION

"Sexy Ebola Containment Suit"

Enhanced-26162-1414336108-1

(Thanks to Jon Harris)

Posted by Dave on October 27, 2014 at 08:45 AM
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HE'S AN EXPERT, SO WE REALLY SHOULD LISTEN

Errol Louis Warns New Yorkers To Not Eat Ebola-Infected Poop or Mucus

(Thanks to Steve K)

Posted by Dave on October 27, 2014 at 08:37 AM
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WE'RE STARTING TO REALLY LIKE SCIENCE

First alcohol. And now this: Compound in cocoa found to reverse age-related memory loss

(Thanks to coscolo)

Posted by Dave on October 27, 2014 at 08:28 AM
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TURNS OUT SHE *DOESN'T* LIKE PINA COLADAS AND GETTING CAUGHT IN THE RAIN

A Georgia man has been charged with assaulting a woman in Eastern Kentucky because he thought she didn't match the description she had given on the Internet

(Thanks to Jon Harris)

Posted by Dave on October 27, 2014 at 08:21 AM
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EW

Doctors remove 9-pound hairball from teen's stomach

(Thanks to Sarah Westermann)

Posted by Dave on October 27, 2014 at 08:18 AM
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BE ON THE LOOKOUT FOR A SINGLE SMALL CAR

A wave of panic sparked by evil clowns stalking French towns has spread to the south of France

(Thanks to Bill Hudgins)

Posted by Dave on October 27, 2014 at 08:12 AM
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WHICH MEANS THEY QUALIFY FOR FLORIDA DRIVERS' LICENSES

Plants Can Tell When They’re Being Eaten

(Thanks to Focalpoint and DaninDallas)

Posted by Dave on October 27, 2014 at 08:10 AM
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'CHINA'S ONLY PENIS SPECIALTY RESTAURANT CHAIN'

A chef poses with a plate of yak penis

SCCZEN_171014SPLYAK_620x310

(Thanks to Ross Marks)

Posted by Dave on October 27, 2014 at 08:06 AM
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October 25, 2014

ADVISORY

Getting pregnant gets easier when eating ice cream

(Thanks to The Perts)

Posted by Dave on October 25, 2014 at 11:04 AM
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THE WILD (MID)WEST

A pack of wild coyotes in Illinois has proved to be pivotal in the capture of an Iowa fugitive.

(Thanks to Diane Bursack)

Posted by Dave on October 25, 2014 at 11:03 AM
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CHICAGO

Roach Scurries Around City Council Chamber As Pest Control Boss Testifies

(Thanks to Allen at Division and coscolo, who says "It felt right at home.")

It probably also voted.

Posted by Dave on October 25, 2014 at 10:59 AM
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WE CAN'T REMEMBER WHETHER WE ALREADY POSTED THIS

Seniors, Rejoice: Drinking Alcohol May Preserve Your Memory

(Thanks to Allen at Division, who says "Way ahead of you here.")

Posted by Dave on October 25, 2014 at 10:53 AM
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THE INTERNET

You can find anything. Anything.

Advisory: Semi-NSFW.

(Thanks to Joanne Fineberg)

Posted by Dave on October 25, 2014 at 10:46 AM
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BOLO

Portsmouth police seek man who asked women to see his pantyhose

(Thanks to Poker, who asks, "Possibly related to the Zebra Dress Bank Robber?")

Posted by Dave on October 25, 2014 at 10:44 AM
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October 24, 2014

INCREDIBLY, ALCOHOL APPEARS TO HAVE BEEN INVOLVED

Double 'wet Willy' lands airman in jail

(Thanks to Chuck Cody)

Posted by Dave on October 24, 2014 at 11:56 AM
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THIS TURNED OUT NOT TO BE WHAT WE THOUGHT IT WAS, THANK GOD

Chinese woman spends entire week in KFC after dumping

(Thanks to Unholy Slacker)

Posted by Dave on October 24, 2014 at 10:56 AM
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WEST VIRGINIA SOCIAL NOTE

Man arrested for sex with beagle

(Thanks to Bill McGeachen)

Posted by Dave on October 24, 2014 at 10:51 AM
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IT LOOKS AS CLASSY AS IT SOUNDS

Realistic Japanese doll dispenses drinks when you squeeze her breasts

(Thanks to Ron G.)

Posted by Dave on October 24, 2014 at 10:49 AM
Permalink | Comments (16)

SMACKS OF DESPERATION

Bald Head Seeks Permit for Terminal Groin

(Thanks to SCemjazz)

Posted by Dave on October 24, 2014 at 10:42 AM
Permalink | Comments (6)

GENEALOGY UPDATE

Unfortunately, our strict etc.

(Thanks to James)

Posted by Dave on October 24, 2014 at 10:39 AM
Permalink | Comments (4)

'COME HERE OFTEN?'

Ferns "talk" to each other to determine their sex

(Thanks to Peter Metrinko)

Posted by Dave on October 24, 2014 at 10:34 AM
Permalink | Comments (6)

MIRACULOUSSSSS

World's Longest Snake Has Virgin Birth

(W. von Papineau)

Posted by Dave on October 24, 2014 at 10:31 AM
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DUDE

Man accidentally texts his probation officer asking for weed

(Thanks to Larry Martell and Chris Elzi)

Posted by Dave on October 24, 2014 at 10:29 AM
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SCIENCE

Male Spine Motion During Coitus: Implications for the Low Back Pain Patient

(Thanks to Jon Harris)

Posted by Dave on October 24, 2014 at 10:23 AM
Permalink | Comments (4)

IN THAT CASE, MA'AM, YOU ARE FREE TO GO

Oklahoma woman says she’s a witch, and she needs her meth

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)

Posted by Dave on October 24, 2014 at 10:16 AM
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YOU'RE WELCOME

This Saturday night sees the return of Soulboys v Rudeboys in the Cellar bar on Eglinton Street. The brainchild of local vinyl junkie and DJ Dave Barry, the idea has been copied in clubs in Europe but it all started here in Galway.

Posted by Dave on October 24, 2014 at 10:14 AM
Permalink | Comments (4)

BE ON THE LOOKOUT

Man wearing zebra-print dress robs Rochester bank

He accessorized with nylons. (On his head.)

(Thanks to Poker)

Posted by Dave on October 24, 2014 at 10:12 AM
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October 23, 2014

IT SEEMS UNFAIR UNTIL YOU REALIZE THERE ARE *THREE* ATTORNEYS

An Alabama man who sued over being hit and kicked by police after leading them on a high-speed chase will get $1,000 in a settlement with the city of Birmingham, while his attorneys will take in $459,000, officials said Wednesday.

(Thanks to Jon Harris)

Posted by Dave on October 23, 2014 at 12:47 PM
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THEY'RE FOR LINCOLN

850 voters in NYC are officially 164 years old

(Thanks to Bill Hudgins, who notes that they all have valid Florida drivers' licenses)

Posted by Dave on October 23, 2014 at 12:42 PM
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ALSO TOTALLY JUSTIFIED

Uncle accused of stabbing nephew over pork chop

And again, you know the state.

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)

Posted by Dave on October 23, 2014 at 12:39 PM
Permalink | Comments (10)

 
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