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February 08, 2018

DOES ANYBODY BLAME HIM?

Toronto police officer allegedly becomes intoxicated while guarding dead body

(Thanks to John K)

NOW WITH ADDED RODENT FECES!

A Little Caesars in Indianapolis, IN, was shut down by health inspectors Tuesday morning after a couple found rodent feces baked into the crust of their pizza.

(Thanks to Le Petomane, who says “This pizza tastes like crap.”)

WAIT, WHY IS THAT BAD?

70,000 karaoke microphones recalled across Canada over explosion concerns

(Thanks to Roberto)

TOTALLY JUSTIFIED

An Alabama man allegedly beat his roommate after discovering that the victim had failed to properly seal a box of Cap’n Crunch cereal, which had gone stale, police report.

Key Excerpt: At one point, Smith demanded that his roommate remove his dentures so that he could experience how hard it was to consume the Cap'n Crunch. 

(Thanks to Steven Pudlo, Chris Elzi and Greg Snow, who says “Roll Tide.”)

YOU'D THINK THAT WOULD BE EXCELLENT PREPARATION

A New Jersey sheriff's officer has lost her job because she previously appeared in bondage films as a dominatrix.

(Thanks to Kevin Smith, who says "Didn’t even need training to use cuffs.")

BOLO

A Houston couple wants their vacation house returned to them.

(Thanks to ubetcha)

THE POLICE 'OPERATION RAPTOR' TEAM HASHTAG IS -- REALLY -- #POOWATCH

Harlow drug suspect on 20th day of toilet strike

(Thanks to Kevin Smith and Emily, Leslie and w)

SPIRIT AIRLINES HAS A SOLUTION

In Plymouth, ‘emotional support rooster’ has people complaining

(Thanks to Not My Usual Alias)

CAPITALISM

A Snowball Vending Machine In Minnesota

(Thanks to John Lobert)

WHY YOU SHOULD ALWAYS PAY ATTENTION TO THE SAFETY BRIEFING

Nigeria's Dana Air blames passenger after door falls off

(Thanks to Matt Filar)

THIS IS ON THE FRONT PAGE OF TODAY'S MIAMI HERALD

Bad info from Spirit Air led me to flush pet hamster down airport toilet, student says

IF YOU WATCH ONLY ONE VIDEO THIS YEAR OF AN EXPLODING BEETLE ESCAPING FROM A TOAD'S STOMACH

Make it this one.

(Thanks to The Perts)

GO FIGURE

A simple sketch of a suspected thief in Pennsylvania drawn by a witness to the crime has been mercilessly mocked on social media

1518029005295

(Thanks to Roberto, John Lobert and Le Petomane, who says "You would never forget a face like that.")

A WIN IN THE STRUGGLE FOR FUNDAMENTAL HUMAN RIGHTS

Prosecutors in South Carolina have dropped charges against a woman who had been accused of dressing up as a dinosaur and scaring two carriage horses in Charleston.

(Thanks to Peter Metrinko)

NOW WITH ADDED PROTEIN

Woman claims to find 3-inch lizard inside store-bought lettuce

(Thanks to Jane Linderman)

IN THEIR DEFENSE, THEY USED EXPRESS MAIL

Someone tried to mail a tiger cub

(Thanks to Le Petomane, who says "Tiger Gram?")

THIS HAPPENS FAR TOO OFTEN

Woman comes home to find neighbor’s corgi riding her one-eyed pony

(Thanks to Janice Gelb, who says "These euphemisms are getting ridiculous.")

ATTENTION, TAXPAYERS OF EDMONTON:

Leanne Olson is beginning her stint as the first artist-in-residence at the city’s waste management centre.

(Thanks to The Perts)

WHEN THEY WERE DROPPED OFF, THEY HAD UNIBROWS

State investigating after moms claim Pasco daycare waxed children's eyebrows

(Thanks to Fabian Marson)

 
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