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January 30, 2018

*YOU* TRY TELLING IT TO STOP

Elephant Crosses China-Laos Border, Ignoring Security Checkpoint

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)

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No doubt checking how high the corn crop is.

Totally unrelated, but this seems a good opportunity to share this anecdote (and it does say something about elephants):

The final episode of the first season of The Twilight Zone was a lighthearted Richard Matheson script about a playwright (played by Keenan Wynn) who is able to conjure up objects simply by describing them into his dictaphone. In one scene, when his wife thinks he's insane and tries to leave the house, he conjures up an elephant in the front foyer to block her way. The only way to make it look convincing on film was to shoot the whole scene live with a real elephant. Producer Buck Houghton later described the experience: "I came around a stage corner and there was the elephant. And the elephant man was having him go on his nose and then on his back legs, and on his nose and then on his back legs, and then his nose -– I stood there wondering what this guy was beating this poor elephant to death for. Finally -– he didn’t give the next order -– the elephant shit a bale of hay. And he says 'Now he’s good for two hours.' So I went in and I told (the episode's director) 'You’ve got two hours to use the elephant or we’re in trouble.'"

This wouldn't have happened if that TV channel hadn't aired HATARI! recently, showing baby elephants chasing the woman around and "ensuing chase ends when the three baby elephants corner Dallas in a hotel lobby in town." It's a gateway to elephant deliquency!

What? John Wayne, we need you now....

Can I see your passport please?

My be of interest if you are in the market for a new home.

I have a Laotian friend I have been an acquaintance with for some twenty odd years. Laos is a very poor underdeveloped, third world county of approximately 5 million. 99.5 percent of the population have never seen actual money. Several years ago He went to Laos and built a home from the ground up for his wife's family. Wood is very expensive so no one builds with wood. He built the house with cement cinder blocks. I didn't ask him what the cost was, but I got the impression the money involved for construction looked something like this.

Construction material for sides, roof, entire exterior including mortar. $27.85

Wiring for three electrical outlets. .76 cents.

Gravel for driveway. The entire country is made of gravel. Free.

One windows complete with trimmed cider block fame. Windows are expensive. Waxed paper window. .14 cents.

Total cost for new home: Around fifty bucks.

So if you are in the market and plan to have a custom home built look no father than having that dream home built in Laos. Schools are expensive so no school district will be nearby, but an Elephant crossing into China probably is.

Thank in advance.

If only China had some kind of big wall to keep that from happening.

So if he's a tourist, did security check his trunk?
Thank you...

Nobody at the checkpoint was in their pajamas, so they couldn't shoot it.

I think this is how WWI started.

@manual tomato--The elephant only was in Laos for two hours. Maybe it checked out the housing and schools, then decided to return to China.

I spent time in Laos during my misspent youth. This elephant is way smarter than we were. It only took it two hours to discover there was nothing there to see or eat. The Air Force gave us two months to come to the same conclusion. Elephants are smart.

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