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January 09, 2018

NOBEL PRIZE ALERT

With ingestible pill, you can track fart development in real time on your phone

(Thanks to Dana Sutton)

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Brought to you, without irony, by Ars Technica.

This would be way more useful if it tracked other's fart development.

I know when I should leave the room on account of me, it would be nice if others in my household had an early warning system. "Oh,nothing, Dear."

The Apple iToot will soon be a must-have device. We have always had to deal with them, so here is an ode to farts:

A fart can occur
in a number of places
and leave everyone there
with strange looks on their faces
from wide-open prairie
to small elevators
a fart will find all of us
sooner or later.
----Anon

I don't need this. From the moment I hit the Taco Bell drive-thru window, I can already predict the sequence of events with clocklike precision.

(Yes, I know, TMI.)

One small step towards fartological advancement: leading inexorably to this vision of the future.

Hmmm -- I just noticed I used a colon in the previous sentence.

" The authors are optimistic that the capsule’s gas readings can help clear the air..."

Oh... I doubt that.

I've got the perfect generic name for this capsule: The Crop Duster.

C-SPAN has an app?

I now know way more than I need to.

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